The March-ers (2019) #3

[Angelmiracle]

We're a chatty bunch 😄

Thread 3 for the March-ers!!

Everyone check in please 👍🏼
🤰🏻👣

@Moosterthemoose I sleep the same way, tummy/side, and have one side lining my front and the other down my back so I can lie the same way but take the pressure off the belly/boobs. If you like to hook one knee over you can pull in the back side underneath you and under the knee to increase the height and padding. Sooo comfortable! It also works if you want to lie partially on your back safely. Options always good later in pg!

That pillow is a beast murphyrocks! It must be like getting a hug from a giant.
I still have my Theraline one from last time, but it’s tiny compared to yours.

@newatbabystuff I would agree with Mooster. If you feel like you need more room then I’d definitely do it sooner rather than later. Even better if you can move before you buy any baby stuff - it’s crazy how quickly it starts accumulating! I found the first 6 months were basically just trying to survive from day to day so something stressful like a house move is the last thing you’ll need.

@newatbabystuff for our sins, we will be moving (buying) before the baby comes. At least that's the plan. We're in a two-bed flat at the moment which wouldn't be the end of the world, but had planned to buy asap even before getting pg, so we are just going to get on with it. We're looking for places that need a bit less work than we'd initially planned though. Some friends of ours moved into their new house less than a month before their baby arrived, which was pretty hair-raising, so I'm consoling myself that at least we have more time than they did.

@MurphyRocks that pillow! I actually exclaimed when I saw it! Showed it to DP and he said, 'I need that!'. So maybe we'll get two... and a bigger bed...

commiserations and solidarity to everyone who's feeling gross. I know, @BadBadBeans I keep thinking about those women who have 16 kids - actually HOW?! imagine feeling this gross for about a third of your life. Mrs Beeton's mother had 24 children. Think on that.

Me too - I feel so horrible and fed up @MistakenHoliday -
Putting on weight at a rate of knots, unwanted hair growing quicker than I can sort it, constant nausea, tiredness, and generally feeling so so yuck!! Eugh.
I'm going on a group holiday at the end of August (my idea of hell at the best of times) - all the ladies keep messaging about the clothes they're buying and the beauty treatments they've got booked. I feel so blobby and yucky I can't even think about trying to look nice.
All my friends with new second babies are having a hellish time too so I can't even look forward to the baby actually coming! Hormonal rant over xx

@ladycarlotta hope you find somewhere and have a straightforward sale. New house and new baby! Exciting times.

Horrible insomnia tonight, I've been up since1.30am. A combination of hormones, pg anxiety and work stress I think. I'm feeling a lot of anxiety due to my MC in Jan and even though I've reached 7+6, I still feel like this is going to be ripped away from me again. I just want to lock myself away and I'm exhausted from it all. I've got my booking appointment on Friday so I know I need to talk to her but I just needed to let this out.

Sorry for the stress @hidcat are you having an early scan or waiting for 12 weeks? Pregnancy after mc is terrifying. Remember that every day that you are pg, the mc risk drops.

We just bought a house and will be moving soon. We’ve been in a 2 bed apartment for the last few years and in some ways it was easier with a baby—> toddler. I can always hear what he’s up to and keep an eye of him. It’s also kind of nice that visitors have to stay in a hotel! But with 2 kids and a dog we will definitely need more space now so we went for it. I’m a bit scared about the big change. At the moment I have a lot of mum friends living nearby and often bump into them and go for a walk or a coffee. Now we are moving out to a village where I don’t know anyone and meet ups with existing friends will have to be arranged.

@Shampooeeee no, I'm waiting for the 12week scan. I've got 2 weeks off after Friday so I'm hoping that's going to help.

@ladycarlotta We’d be selling/buying too - i’ve never sold before so bit daunted by the whole process, and the step up is so big where I live. Sounds like it will be worth it though just for a bit of peace of mind that it’s done before baby comes!

I definitely agree with others that it's easier to move while pregnant- especially with your first as you can pack and unpack in peace without having to supervise anyone.

Also worth considering it might be harder to get a mortgage once you're on maternity leave if you need both salaries to make the sums add up.

This constant nausea can do one. I've had enough. Work is really busy too so I feel like I just work, feel sick, and sleep.

Sickness is back with a vengeance

Whoever called it going away at 8w and coming back at 10w wins 🤦‍♀️

@newatbabystuff our house is up for sale at the moment https://www.rightmove.co.uk/property-for-sale/property-73301963.html if anyone is feeling nosy :)
It's been up a little while so starting to worry we won't get sold in time.
What @Sarahandduckarehigh said about it being harder to get a a mortgage is also right.
The bank will lend us £30,000 less once we have a LO. That's without taking maternity into consideration... it's just by putting that we would have 1 dependent.
So we're trying to hurry things up as much as possible. We had a viewing last night (I think the 17th one) and I was so ill that my mum, dad and brother came to help me tidy the house and garden. I couldn't have done it by myself as I threw up 14 times yesterday!
I hate the garden picture I looks awful! And there are photos missing of the bathroom and our bedroom so I'm going to get the estate agents to come back next week and take some more pictures.

Agree with what people have said about moving whilst pregnant - definitely easier. We are in the process of remortgaging to finance a loft conversion and were asked to disclose anything that might change our income. The bank specifically mentioned maternity leave, so I had to say yes (especially as I am a solicitor, so have to be whiter than white in these sorts of situations). I then had to provide a letter from my employer with agreed dates of maternity leave and pay and predicted salary on return. I also had to provide evidence of savings to cover any shortfall in income during maternity leave and estimated childcare costs on return. All a bit much!!! But the mortgage is now agreed in principle. Just thought I’d flag up in case anyone else is planning to remortgage...

I come to end of the fixed term in exactly 1 year. I'm dreading it as OH is self employed and our mortgage is purely based on my salary as I bought it before we were together.

Just wildly crossing my fingers

My nausea is worse than ever before. Even brushing my teeth triggered my gag reflex this morning. I don't want to be in work today, I'm due to be out at meetings all afternoon and I'm just not feeling able to cope today. I know that sounds pathetic. I've been up since 5am, I'm sleeping really badly, I'm more constipated than I've ever been in my life, I've got rampant body hair going on that grows like it's on a mission to take over the world, I'm so bloated that none of my clothes fit, my hair is greasy, my skin is spotty, I've sprouted another chin from somewhere and I'm really fucking grumpy. I know people who have 'glowed' throughout their pregnancies. The only glowing I'm doing is the faint sheen of perspiration over my pale, clammy little face as I struggle to hold back the rising tidal wave of nausea. I think we all deserve medals. I know this is super exciting and wonderful and I do realise how incredibly lucky I am, but it's also shit to feel so shit.

My irritating colleague is also excelling themselves today. They know I'm pregnant and are commenting on everything I put in my mouth. "Oooh, that's not very healthy is it?" about some flavoured water was a personal highlight. It's flavoured water, not meth, calm down.

Sorry, I'll stop grouching now. Pregnancy hormones are making themselves known today. The rage is indescribable.

toastfiend your post made me laugh that pretty much sums up how I’m feeling right now. I feel a right grump but I’m hot, uncomfortable and just feel blurgh

I have glowing spots all over my face if that counts?

@Bas27, what a beautiful house!

We're in the south east and only managed to buy our first flat last year. More than double the price of your house which is so ridiculous!
We have two bedrooms and one is currently our office space with a desk and storage bits. For now we will leave it like that and baby will be in with us for a while so no need to panic yet. But long term it will be a squeeze. Unless we move we will never afford a bigger property than this!

Moving now is a good idea, babies apart from the pram don’t take up lots of room but when they get to toddler age and your house resembles a toy shop that’s when you need more room

thanks @pushit, it feels like we are becoming Proper Adults in warpspeed time. And I'm sorry you are feeling so horrible. It's so sucky.

@hamandpease ha, I'm glad this is at least a weight off your mind, even if the effects are unpleasant! I had a nice lull at 8 weeks too, now I think about it.

useful to think about the financial effects of mat leave/having a dependent @Sarahandduckarehigh, @Bas27, @peonylover22. So its definitely sensible to get the mortgage now. I won't have maternity leave as I'm self-employed and get my £ in big chunks anyway, so hoping to just set things up so I get a few wads of cash in the months before baby comes, then can take it easy. DP is the one with the salary, it'd be nice if he could have some decent parental leave but we'll see how it goes.

Bas, the pics are really nice! It looks like a sweet little house, and the open plan is great. Don't worry too much. I'm sorry you have been so sick.

Bas thanks for indulging us with a link. Rightmove is my favourite pass time! You’re house is really lovely and in such a big plot too! Remind me where you are? I live daaaan saaaaath and prices are just ludicrous compared to the value for money of your place.

Oh toastfiend I really feel for you, though your post did also make me giggle.

Sleeping so much at the moment, thankfully DS is pretty good at looking after himself and waking me up if I drop off properly!
Sickness is from morning to night and sometimes waking in the night too... Eugh :(

Definitely move as soon as you can! We did it last year and it was stressful trying to pack with DS around. The whole process was super stressful so definitely before 3rd trimester if you can!

@toastfiend goodness that did make me laugh (not at you of course, but you have a witty turn of phrase!) hope you get through today without pouring your flavoured water on your colleague’s head. I think people should be banned from commenting on what pregnant women eat - I can already feel the carb only stage creeping in and DH learnt from last time not to say anything about the beige meals and snacks that were all I could manage.

Hmm I’m a bit concerned about mortgages etc now - thanks for the info upthread. Sounds like lots of us are in flats and wondering what to do. We are in London and while we have a two bed flat there’s no way we could afford to upgrade to a house or ground floor flat with garden in the same area - it would mean moving out and I’m not sure we are ready to do that. I actually earn more than DH so not sure where that leaves us when I’m on mat leave.

My mortgage is up for renewal in September when I’ll be 12 weeks - do I need to declare that I’m pregnant on the forms? (Mortgage in my name only as bought a while ago just after I met DH.)

@ladycarlotta thanks for the sweet reassurance! I am finding it a little stressful now we're on a timer.
@Orville in Nottingham in the East Midlands. The area we are in is to the north of the city and near open fields and i grew up here. It's very much a "middle of the road" place. Crime is OK but it's not fancy. I also spend a lot of time on rightmove. Mostly looking for a new house. Then i get attached and it sells. :(

@nightmanagerfan I would tell them but only if they ask. If it says about circumstances changing or whatever then say so. If they don't ask then they clearly don't need to know. They ask for so much information!