The March-ers (2019) #2

[frankiefumbles]

Eek! On thread 2 already...welcome over everyone!

@ladycarlotta we absolutely have rights! Time off for antenatal appointments, maternity leave, and something along the lines of reasonable adjustments for pregnancy. Obviously very open to interpretation but reasonable employers/humans tend to be pretty good about it :)

I did the same last time, worked really hard during the second/third trimesters when I felt better to make sure I left things in the best possible position and therefore went on maternity guilt free!

Gosh you guys move fast on here - I thought the Nov 18 thread I was on was quick-paced, but this one takes the cake! @Murphyrocks I'm glad I wasn't too slow to follow you over to these boards! Thanks for all the welcomes and the advice about GP appointments. Where I am (Devon) you have to see your GP first, who gives you your notes to start filling in by yourself at home. Then you have a booking-in around 8-10 weeks. Mine was scheduled for 9+1 last time but I started miscarrying the day before - ugh! I think I will ring the GP late next week and try to book an initial appointment for when I'm 5-6 weeks.

Who's told people so far? I've told three of my friends this morning. I have a real thing about not keeping it secret as it's important to me that I have people in real life I can talk to about it and who will support me if things go awry. On the other hand, I don't want the world and his wife to know for a while yet!

@Wineandchoccy my first pregnancy with DS was a surprise while I was on the pill, and this time it was planned and I conceived on the second cycle trying. I was 20 the first time and 27 this time round, so was a bit concerned it wouldn't be as easy now I'm older but I know I am still young! I feel very lucky as I have hypothyroidism which I thought might cause issues, but it has been relatively well controlled for the past year or so and it didn't cause any problems ttc.

@hamandpease I'm really struggling at work, partly because I have realised how hard I was working before to meet my objectives and I feel like I'm no longer able to do that due to nausea and tiredness, so I'm just working my contracted hours which means I am now behind on deadlines. My work has a culture of 'just get it done' so there is an expectation of working long hours and taking work home to meet deadlines, but I think especially once I announce I'm pregnant they will need to lay off and realise I need my rest! I am also studying for a qualification in my spare time so just feel totally maxed out

Like @ladycarlotta my plan was to work as hard as I can until Christmas time so as not to let my team down but it's easier said than done! I was planning to negotiate better maternity pay as well but I feel I can only do this if I've been performing well up until that point.

Only DH knows so far, nearly accidentally mentioned it to a colleague earlier. Will probably tell parents ~8 weeks like we did last time but after scan for others. Not sure I'll get that far without saying though, I'm more excited this time.

@Wineandchoccy it certainly is! You get to the point of wondering if it will ever happen don't you? Glad to see it didn't take you long at all with your DD though, and not quite as long this time around too!

@BadBadBeans yep we're a chatty bunch! There's a Facebook group too which is a bit easier to keep on top of. Here they pretty much insist on seeing you for booking in by 6 weeks so they can tell you all the do's and dont's. I've told my parents and 2 friends, trying to keep it otherwise quiet until my 8 weeks scan next Wednesday.

@mostimproved sounds like you've got a lot going on - do try and take care of yourself too! I found this stage really hard so took it easier, then put the hours in between around 12 and 36 weeks when I had all the energy in the world!

@Murphyrocks I remember the second trimester being the easiest last time so hopefully it's the same this time around!

@BadBadBeans welcome and congratulations! I have told mine and DP's parents, who have told our grandparents and siblings, but haven't told work yet which is the one I'm apprehensive about. I'm going to try and wait until after my 8 week scan which is on 22nd July but may have to tell them sooner to explain my recent sick days and general lack of concentration.

BadBadBeans only DH knows currently but I bet my Mum has guessed she had done previously
Won’t tell work until after the 12 week scan I have new female bosses this time who are nice but very much like to crack the whip so will be nervous telling them. My old boss was a man with 3 children of his own and was just lovely when I told him was like a Dad fussing around me
I am a sales rep so out on the road not looking forward to getting to the weeble stage again driving was very uncomfortable last time.

Welcome @BadBadBeans

I am seeing GP tomorrow at 5+5. I’ve just self-referred to the hospital so not even sure I need to see the GP but thought I’d better just in case 🤷🏻‍♀️
So many questions! I have sore nips too 😫
Came off the pill after Easter so 3 months until BFP. I was away at the wrong time of the month in May though so only really started TTC in June. Feel very grateful that it’s happened so fast, fingers crossed for a sticky one. Last time took 6 months from stopping taking the pill including a chemical pregnancy.
Am trying to keep the circle of trust small but it keeps growing. Obviously DH, also my mother and sisters and a few close friends. But as part of mortgage application the bank said they needed a letter from my work with mat leave dates and pay details 😱 so I’ve had to tell my head of department and someone in HR.

@BadBadBeans I have told parents, MIL, sister and sister in law. And two friends who came for dinner a few weeks ago - the no drinking would have opened up too many questions! I have also told my manager as last pregnancy I had lots of bleeding and figured if that (or anything else) happened I may need to leave in a hurry. I am firmly in the camp that believes you should tell people who you would want to support you in something does go wrong.

I am so tired today, can't be bothered at work, hence why I am posting so much! This does not bode well for the next eight months!

We've told my parents as will need childcare for the other three when I am in labour and I didn't want them to book a cruise I've also told two close friends. I am in the same camp as you @SharpSharp but don't think people are as interested when it's number four.......

I'm hoping to book an early scan soon - I'm about 6+3 now so probably next week.

I've been really lucky so far - I don't feel sick or tired(er than normal). My other pregnancies were really easy - obviously I'm slightly older now (nearly 30) but I only work very part time.

@SweetheartNeckline four before you're 30! That's impressive.

I'm 30, married and still felt like I was breaking the rules a bit when I got my BFP 😂😂

We haven't told anyone! It's really hard. Even with the footy last night.. everyone drinking and going go on have 1?!? I'm like no I'm driving I can't.

I'm so anxious though that we're waiting until 12 weeks even though we had a early scan Monday with heart beat!

Yep we've told both sets of parents, my sister and her hubby, a mate who we went away with (she was all "let's share a bottle a wine"...), and I've told my boss. It's a little network of people who I know I'd need their support if things went wrong - and has meant I don't feel so much pressure on myself at work as the boss knows what's going on. No right answers, I think it's whatever sits most comfortably with you personally! I'm a bit of a sharer.

I'm also really envious of all your scans with sacs and blobs. I'd really love to see my blob. It's got a lot to answer for! I'm trying to hold out for the standard 12 weeker, unless anything concerning happens in the meantime. I'm itching to clap eyes on the bean though!

We've been married nearly a decade which never fails to shock me haha.

We live in an area with (comparatively) very cheap housing so most of my friends got married around age 25 and had their first babies not long after so I'm only slightly ahead of the curve! I had my eldest when I was 23.

One of the things I find fascinating on Mumsnet is how things vary from place to place, chronological age doesn't matter it's more about the stage of life you're at Apparently my stage of life is drowning in laundry, boobs gone south

Anyone else napping every day? I have a 2yr old so take advantage of her sleeps. I do feel guilty though sometimes! Today I left the house in the whirlwind for playgroup day trip and came back straight to bed. Poor hubby is at work since 7.30 and will be in at 6. Better at least cook some dinner...

@pushit 100% napping daily. I'm so wiped. I've been able to work at home the last few afternoons, meaning I can indulge in a half hour siesta mid afternoon and then carry on. My brain isn't functioning without it! DH still cooking dinner though. 😅

oh god, I'm so so tired today. I swam this morning, which I haven't felt up to for a few days, and I think it really took it out of me. I can't concentrate at all - I keep fighting the afternoon nap but I think I just need to embrace it while I'm working from home.
Terrified that I'll feel really sick tomorrow and it'll be horrible getting to the scan in the morning, but can't do much about that.

I had a couple of days of afternoon naps but the last two days I haven't been able to sleep. I seem to be suffering insomnia at night too. I figured out that the lack of nausea was from getting up really early and eating a decent breakfast before it kicked in. I'd rather sleep though!

I can't nap 😩 Working 7:30-6. Shattered from 1 ish too.

Then I get through it and go to bed about 10:30.

@welshsoph I've never heard of them coming to your house apart from when you get to 40 weeks, it seems to vary so much from one area to the next! So is she taking your blood at your house as well?

Has anyone had their 12 weeks scan booked a couple of days before the 12 week?

Thinking 11+5?

Basically our 12 week falls on a Monday and the weekend before is crazy busy with hen do's and family leaving do's etc so was hoping to have the scan and tell people that weekend whilst everyone is together 😬