November 2018 #3

[olderthanyouthink]

Ante-natal thread for babies due this November, continued...

Stats spreadsheet is here - add and update yourself as needed!

Thanks, bleeding has almost stopped now and isn't fresh blood anymore. I'm just going to not move very much for a few days and hope for the best!

How scary, @Saraswati! But so glad you were able to get excellent medical attention right away and that the bleeding is now stopping. Think I've read in the past that the placenta attaching can sometimes cause a blood vessel to burst. Wonder if that's what happened in your case? Either way, sounds like you've been in great hands. Do you need to check in with your mw when you get home?

@sarahhh1984 I think that's what the Italian doctor was trying to say to me, either that or a haematoma near the placenta which I've heard of before. Can feel baby having a little flutter which is reassuring! We get home late sat so I will ring my midwife on Monday, luckily my scan is on weds 2nd so I expect they'll tell me to just wait for that but I want to report it just in case and for it to be noted.

Just catching up on the thread .. so tired all the time over here I'm barely making it though the days so much harder this time around with a little one, can't wait for my energy to come back!!

But on the bump - I don't have only yet but I am sooo bloated all the time! I really didn't shift any baby weight from my first pregnancy so I already feel awful an a lot heavier than I was, I feel as if everyone in work etc. will think I'm just putting on weight if they haven't guessed am pregnant 🤦🏽‍♀️ my boobs are getting bigger but I don't want to get measured and get maternity bras too early?!
I am 9 weeks on Wednesday- you seriously forget how slow the first trimester is, we found out at like 2-3 weeks! Had a early scan at 6 weeks and our next scan will be next week was our estimated 12 week but I am only gonna be 10 weeks. Does anyone know if they can still do the measurements etc for the NT test or will I have to be rescanned at 12 weeks?

saraswati gosh how scary to get that blood and be on holiday. I’m glad to hear it’s stipped and fingers crossed that’s it now.

All of those having second babies I found that my second pregnancy although I shot out pretty quickly at the beginning it all sort of caught up fine later on and although I thought I was going to be bigger I actually wasn’t at all and measured the same. I think tummy muscles are stretched from the first time and so everything starts off quicker! This time I have such a noticeable bump and I’m only 9+3 I can’t belive no one has said anything on the school run. Or maybe they are behind my back!!!

@Emma0802 I think I read yesterday that the NT can be done between weeks 11 and 13, with the optimum time being week 11, so maybe you'll just be on the cusp? Might be worth ringing the midwife to avoid any unnecessary appointments!

@Emma0802 (doubting myself) or maybe that was optimum in week 13? If only I had the book to hand!

@saraswati I’m so sorry to hear that - sounds scary. Look after yourself.

Just back from 12 week scan and had bad news. Baby has a heart defect and chance of downs came back at 1:5. (NT 4.6mm, should be less than 3mm.) we are at kings so saw the highest up professor who was lovely, and fitted us in for CVS later today, which will give us a result that’s 100% accurate by Friday.

All rather a shock and v emotional.

@Saraswati sounds scary but so pleased you were seen quickly and sounds like you've had some excellent care there.

@Nightmanagerfan Must be really worrying for you. Glad you got seen and referred quickly. A lot of information to take in, grab any leaflets offered to take away with you as I imagine it'll all be a bit of a blur. I used to work with babies with heart defects so I can understand a little of what you must be feeling. Keeping everything crossed for you xx

@nightmanagerfan oh god you must be terrified im so sorry. Fingers crossed for a good result on friday. Could they give you any indication of the severity of the heart defect?

nightmanager I’m sorry your scan showed up heart defects and other news you weren’t expecting. I’m glad you’ll have a clear result by Friday.

Thanks @saraswati and @lastnightsmakeup they didn’t say anything about the severity - just that there is leakage in the heart and that they would be able to tell more at 14-16 weeks. We are opting for CVS and Harmony. They were so lovely and actually wanted to do CVS there and then but couldn’t find my blood group, so heading back later today once yet another blood test comes back from the lab (the test for blood group at booking in was inconclusive.)

I could tell something was wrong in the scan - they were v quiet and while he’d been saying here’s the bladder/brain etc all looks normal, when he got to the heart he was quiet and took loads of images and measurements. It also took almost an hour. I’ve been so worried anyway and was really hoping (like everyone) that the scan would
Be normal and I’d feel relieved. Not sure what we will do if it’s positive for downs. I’m a Christian and always
Thought I would be very pro-life in this situation, but it’s different when it’s happening to you.

And to top it all, the dull ache on my left
Side that I mentioned a while back is a bloomin 5cm fibroid!!

I'm so sorry to hear this @Nightmanagerfan. Hope you get the results back quickly.

Had my booking appointment on Saturday, they were ridiculously efficient and it was a bit of a whirlwind. The midwife was very good about my issues with needles, she said she often gets people saying they don't like needles but rarely anyone like me who gets upset at the passing mention of them.

I was supposed to have a blood test that day and then another one at the 12 week scan later this week but she decided to roll them together so I don't have to go through it so much, which was very nice of her and she will ask about putting my nut allergy test in the list of bloods too. I'm supposed to have the glucose test as well late because of having Afro-Caribbean blood 😒. She is also going to try and get me some kind of help for my needle-phobia 🤢 by islets not going to be a quick fix.

I also told the midwife about my brother having SN and a chromosome issue and showed her copies of his letters about it and she is going to consult a geneticist about that and get back to me.

@Emma0902 I've got my 12 week scan this week and I'll be 10+3 then so hopefully they'll be able to do the NT test then, the midwife said they would

@Nightmanagerfan I'm so sorry to hear that, I've got my fingers and toes crossed for you

@Nightmanagerfan I'm so sorry to hear about the scan. It must be a total mix of confusing information and emotions. Great you had the top guy though. Glad they can get the results through by Friday to minimise the wait.

@saraswati how scary that happened but glad it seems to have stopped. I hope it doesn't taint your holiday too much, Sicily is beautiful, one of my favourite places in the whole world. I hope that's all of the worrying over now for you.

Over here my nausea seems to have kicked up a gear again last night and today. Sense of smell through the roof and feeling grim after a week of everything being bearable and I thought I was on an upward trend. Now 14w. Just hoping it's a blip. I def felt baby move last night when I bed feeling so so ill though. It was like it was a "hey, I'm here, what you're feeling is worth it mummy!" which was strangely comforting and made me feel less miserable.

Hoping everyone else feeling OK and any upcoming scans go well.

really sorry to hear that @nightmanagerfan, it's a tricky one to know what you are going to do if you do find out the baby has downs, there is such a variety within the diagnosis as well. I know of a little boy with downs syndrome at my daughters mainstream school and he is the happiest and loveliest child ever!

Also remember that although the risk is 1 in 5, that is still a 4 in 5 chance of not being. Also there are so many things they can do with heart defects now, particularly as they have spotted it very early on - they can have the heart specialists there as you give birth to give your baby the absolute best chance of a fantastic life.

Yes it's a tricky time to deal with, and yes you have the absolute right to mourn the easy pregnancy you hoped for, but then pick yourself back up and keep looking at the positives. It is not a typical journey, but that just makes your journey more unique and special to you :)

It is worth asking for advice/support from your minister/church, but ultimately, despite being in the christian faith, you will know how YOU feel, and how YOUR family can best deal with the situation you have been dealt. And if that means termination is the best option for you both then maybe that is the option that you want to consider. Similarly you might feel that you want to go ahead, which is absolutely fine too, but you will hear naysayers for each side of the argument. Be kind to yourself, and be gentle with your emotions x

Just catching up - @nightmanagerfan, this must be such a difficult time, fingers crossed for the best possible outcome and that the next few days goes quickly. If it comes to it, you know you’ll make the best possible decision for you and your partner. Wishing you all the best for the next few days

@Nightmanagerfan I'm so sorry, I hope for a good outcome for you. X

@Nightmanagerfan I feel for you so much. It's hard to balance being hopeful and being realistic and I guess that boils down to your own coping mechanisms. I've had a few attempts at responding to your last post and I suppose my struggle with trying to write the 'correct' thing is that even with my lack of faith, and having a background of working with children with heart defects and chromosome abnormalities, I hand on heart wouldn't know what I would do either. It's such a personal situation and what is right for one family is not right for another. And as pp said DS is such a broad diagnosis between those who are severely disabled and those who live a relatively independent life.
I'm pleased they're able to give you the extra tests today and the wait (although I'm sure will seem an age) is not too long. Kings is an excellent centre for foetal medicine so you're in good hands.

@Nightmanagerfan I hope that came across as intended. I will add that I looked after far more children with heart defects who didn't have DS than those who did xx

Thanks all. I so appreciate your messages of support. What I didn’t mention is that the risks of other chromosomal abnormalities are also high. In a way I am hoping the result is either good or really bad - that way it will be made for us.

I asked the Professor what he thought in his opinion, and he said that the combination of blood result & nuchal translucency & the heart problem meant he thought it was highly likely it has downs.

This is really hard. I’m going to be kind to myself and spend lots of time with DH (who is being amazing.)

Sorry to hear your tests didn't go well, @Nightmanagerfan. I hope your further tests give you more clarity and allow you to make the right decision for you and you DH. Thinking of you.

@sarahhh1984 i really hope you are ok since & can enjoy some part at least of your holoday.

@Nightmanagerfan so sorry for the worry now you are going through 💗

When did anyones nausea subside, im 10+2 & itsdefinitely not as debilitating but still there, scaring me as had bit of brown tinged cm this morning & of course fearing the worst even with seeing all was good last week.

I think you meant to direct your kind message to @Saraswati, @keepinghopeful.

Sorry @sarahhh1984 😳