November 2018 #2

[BadBadBeans]

Ante-natal thread for babies due this November, continued...

Stats spreadsheet is here - add and update yourself as needed!

Hi all, I've not been posting but have been keeping up with the convo. Hope you're all doing ok. Sorry to hear about the spotting and bleeds, hope you managed to get checked. Sending love.

I saw One born every minute got a mention. I just have to say that it really annoyed me last night! Both women were just laid on their backs the entire time!! Luckily the births ended up ok in the end, but the lady on the gas and air (4th baby) almost got into trouble because she just wasn't in tune with her body. She'd had so much gas and air she could barely even push. Ending with both midwifes just screaming at her to push. She could have had such a peaceful and productive birth in a more natural position. The younger lady had a baby in back to back position. Why didn't they get her squatting to at least let gravity help and open up her hips?! This just isn't how it's meant to be and is the reason my first labour ended up in emergency c-section. I was also strapped on my back to a bed. I wish I knew then what I know now! Anyone else feel the same?! And for first time birthers (if you're planning natural labour) pleeeease look into active or hypno birthing etc so that you can be clear to your care team, nice and early about how you want to labour. I wish I'd known! I've just found an active birth Doula who runs partner workshops etc too (I'm hoping for a homebirth this time) so I think I'm going to book in with her.

Can you tell I'm feeling emotional right now?!

Thank you for all the good wishes! Had my scan and all ok! We are very relieved! No reason for the bleeding but if it happens again they’ll see me in the EPU no problem. Best wishes to everyone else having early scans too 🤞

@marchblossom the same thing happened n to me as you - back to back baby, strapped to bed lying on my back so they could monitor baby as had meconium in waters and ended up c section. It was so annoying as I was just shouted at and not allowed to get into a better position or walk about! Have you had a VBAC or will this be your second?

march and toaster I thought the same about the beds but was a bit worried I’d sound preachy if I mentioned it
I was really fortunate, we have a local Positive Birth Facebook page that someone linked me up with and I discovered a local hypnobirthing teacher who was a friend of a friend and had a very similar science background to me (so not at all ‘woo’) and DH and I did a private course with her. It was amazing, it prepared him as well as me much better for the birth and he was brilliant on the day. I was even more lucky to get the one pool room in our entire city and my ideal waterbirth. I spent a whole 5 minutes on my back when they asked if I could possibly lay down for them to examine me and that was it! I nearly didn’t have a midwife in the room when DS was born as they weren’t convinced as was as far along as I was and DH didn’t think to pull the emergency cord when he started to be able to see a head! Fortunately she popped in at just the right moment and called the second midwife too. There was a scary minute where both the midwife and DH were telling me to push even though we’d agreed no coached pushing - I figured they knew something I didn’t and pushed. Turns out DSs head had been born and they could see the cord round his neck so needed body out ASAP! He was fine. I’d love a waterbirth again but to be sure of that in our area means a homebirth, which I’m a little nervous of.

Hi @toasterstrudle yes this is no. 3 had a successful vbac with no.2 - super quick labour, started very gently at around midnight and she was born at 3am. Unfortunately as I was considered high risk due to previous section, still ended up on my back strapped to a bed with the male consultant doctor at the 'helm', telling me I needed to be cut etc. Feet hooked up in stirrups so he could see better Luckily by the time I got to hospital she was already nearly out so I wasn't like this for long - I remember them telling me to sit down and wait to be triaged when I arrived, but I could feel her head coming out lol!! So wasn't on that bed for long. Can't wait to have a home birth this time round (with a midwife and hopefully doula too). I genuinely feel really confident now after reading so much around natural, unassisted birth. Going with the body, moving around, water bath or just home comforts, darkened room, sacred space, not being told when to push, fetal ejection reflex etc etc. Pregnancy and labour really aren't the medical condition that we've forced them into being. Yes, modern medicine for the few that need help is truly wonderful and life saving, but for most women it can be at best, a bit intrusive and at worst, entirely counterproductive.

Are you hoping for a vbac? I'm so glad I went for mine!

@DrWhy I thought the same (still waiting to be told off for being judgy!) and almost didn't post it, but then thought about how I wish I'd known when I was young and clueless and pregnant with my first so posted anyway
Your birth experience sounds dreamy! That's what I had hoped for with my first. The staff there had other ideas. That was at the Whittington in Islington 10 yes ago, which I found our after, really didn't have a great rep (might be better now I have no idea!) It had a super high emergency c-section rate at the time. Good luck and keep us posted on your options for a water birth!

That's fab @marchblossom, thank you so much for sharing your experience and how it was positive despite adverse circumstances! I'd like to look into VBAC more and think I'm going to do hypnobirthing course before making final decision. Feel a bit 'better the devil you know' with the section but also would really like the positive vaginal birth I'd hoped for last time. Have been put off a bit by last experience but have booking app next week and hoping to get VBAC info and then look into hypnobirthing.

@DrWhy your hypnobirthing experience sounds great too - you must have been very chilled if you didn't pull the cord at the sight of the head, haha! Water birth looks fab, if you're near enough a hospital then home birth probably worth enquiring about too!

@toasterstrudle you're welcome and good luck with your journey. It's great to feel more informed and empowered isn't it? I'm also going to look into hypnobirthing. Has anyone read Orgasmic Birth by Elizabeth Davis? That's next on my list. Whatever you decide, I'm sure it will be the best outcome for your baby and you

Regarding One Born Every Minute - I watched loads of it when I was pregnant with DS. Cried at pretty much every episode! The one that really stuck with me was a super-calm hippie woman who was very determined to labour naturally and was active about getting into good positions etc. (That is what I hoped I would be like!) I found it was useful for giving me a bit of insight into what actually goes on during a variety of births. If it had made me feel uneasy I would have stopped watching!

@toasterstrudle it won't be a huge gap, but DS will be 2 years and 3 or 4 months, so quite an established toddler! We got pregnant right away the first time, so we did wait until we were definitely sure we were ready for another before we tried again. Good job too, as we were first time lucky again! My DH is pretty hardcore about pain tolerance etc and suspects me of being a total wimp, thus the lack of sympathy. He was reasonably impressed by my breastfeeding through recurrent tongue tie and mastitis though!

@wejammin @SkyLucy Yes! I used hypnobirthing when I was induced with DS and it was BRILLIANT. I vaguely remember the midwife saying to my husband that she was impressed by how calm I was and how good my breathing was. (She probably says that to everyone though to make them feel good - haha!) I felt like it gave me control and I didn't even think about asking for pain relief for the rest of the time I was in labour - not even gas and air. Full disclaimer though - I never got past 4cm dilated, and I did take two paracetamol and a dose of oramorph very early on in labour. I'd never heard of oramorph before, and if I'd been more compus mentis I would probably have turned it down. It sounded like a weak painkiller to me - I hadn't realised it was liquid morphine!!!! Anyway, I'm all up for hypnobirthing again this time, even with a C-section - I'm certain it would help.

@Clarigirl87 great news on the scan!

@marchblossom it's lovely to hear about successful VBACs! Still don't think it's for me - but I am trying to keep an open mind.

Hi all,

Can I tentatively join please? I got my BFP 2 weeks ago and have been lurking on this thread ever since. For some reason I feel quite cautious about this pregnancy and have not been getting myself over excited. Based on my last period I am due on 11th Nov - however I imagine this will get pushed back a little when I have a scan.

This will be baby number 2 for us I have a two year old DS already. First delivery was by EMCS following a 3 day induction. I am hoping to avoid similar this time around. I am quite open to a planned CS or Vbac but I want to avoid an induction this time as my body just did not respond well to it.

I have been having spotting since Monday - but I had this at pretty much the same time in my first pregnancy so trying not to get too worries about it. Heading to the GP this afternoon to get referred to the midwife so will mention it then.

Just catching up on One Born now

Yep @BadBadBeans I've totally been crying at it already and I totally empathise with your decision - it was so hard for me to try again for a natural labour the second time round and I did nearly book a section. I was so utterly terrified the whole pregnancy. If it wasn't for getting that one vaginal delivery under my belt (so to speak !!), believe me I wouldn't be so confident now! Good luck with whatever you choose - either way it'll be the right way for you and baby x

Welcome @ReadySteadyWiggle and congratulations:) I had a similar experience with my first (induction and then emergency section) and totally agree that avoiding the induction is the main priority. They really do seem to contribute massively to emergency sections.

@LastNightsMakeUp thanks that’s really helpful!!

@marchblossom and @toasterstrudel it really was a really positive experience, I was well prepared by the hypnobirthing which helped as I had a range of relaxation techniques to draw on but ultimately I was just very lucky that our hideously understaffed midwife led unit was open that day and no-one else wanted the pool. I also had a lovely midwife who wasn’t bothered that DS was measuring a bit big and a consultant who I saw after a scan at 39 weeks that showed he was already 8lb plus just said if I was happy she was happy, no pressure to induce. I did end up with a tear and some grazing so I had stitches and took what seemed like an age to heal but all seems to be well now. I will be doing pelvic floor exercises like crazy through this pregnancy though!!
I think I must have been quite calm, I didn’t see the head although DH apparently did, when the midwife said she could see it and pulled the buzzer I just said ‘I told you it felt different’ in between swigs of gas and air! I then got lovely skin to skin in the pool before getting out to deliver the placenta, still with baby and then stitches where they gave DS to DH (who’s chest he immediately pooped on ).

@BadBeans my DS will be the same age as your first. I’m really hoping that I can explain to him what’s happening and that he stays his lovely cheery helpful self when the new arrival turns up rather than becoming a resentful tantrumming mess...
I’m not planning to tell him until after 12 weeks when I’ll have the first scan and probably Harmony test again. They are expensive but given my age I would want to know if there was any problem sooner rather than later - now I have DS to think about too it could be a very hard decision.

Thanks @marchblossom congrats to you too. I think I’m going to keep my options open, chat to the midwives and make a decision nearer the time. I would love to experience labour fully (last time I only got to 2cm dilated before the crashed me for the EMCS) but if they push to induce again I will be asking them to go straight to CS. It’s good to know you had a vbac the second time around. Gives me confidence that’s it can be done.

I hope we aren’t scaring all the first timers with the birth chat It’s a very long time before we will need to make any decision or even know enough about the pregnancy to make any decision.
(but do try hypnobirthing )

Hello! I lost you all for a while - is it too early to blame baby brain for not finding the new thread?!
Yes to everyone saying about weight gain. I'm 8 weeks and feel like I've put on about 6 pounds 😳
I've been spotting all week, so got an EPU scan tomorrow. Trying to stay positive.
Hope everyone is ok.

I need to step away from testing but I can’t help myself. Did a clearblue this morning, I’m 4+3 and got 2-3 weeks on it which although has made me happy has got me thinking about peeing on more stuff....

whining hope the spotting isn’t anything sinister and your scan tomorrow is ok.

Sorry to hear about everyone who didn't have a great experience in previous births.

I just wanted to balance the view for first time mums who may need inducing. I was induced at 38 weeks, laboured for 5 hours, give birth naturally, and only had grazing so no stitches required. Was it painful, hell yes, the contractions do not build up but happen at top pain immediately so your body does not get a chance to get use to them. However I am the biggest wuss around. My family constantly joked they didn't want to be in the country when I gave birth and I managed on gas and air. I did request an epidural but I was to far gone at 9/10cm (I was in transition period which my NCT class taught is the most painful bit and it really is).

Would I mind if I was to be induced again: I wouldn't necessarily choose it but I wouldn't be worried about it.

Also I insisted on bouncing on my ball throughout so I made them work around me with monitoring of heart beat. Do not let them restrict you to a bed, especially on your back. I gave birth on my knees.

I am so sorry for those who did struggle with it and everyone is different but I just thought it was important to share my good experience for first time mums who may be frightened.

@confuddledconfudle a nice story to share, thank you. I'm only 7+1 with my first and not currently thinking about anything birth related!!

Can anyone let me have their nausea-reducing food tips? I'm eating little and often but getting a little fed up of mini cheddars, tucs and water biscuits. I'm finding fizzy drinks also help. What other food/drink works for everyone?

Had my scan and consultant appointment letter today, 30th April, will be 12+2.

Nice to see some of your early scans, I have one booked for this Sunday when I’ll be 7+1.

Absolutely @confuddledconfudle - I'd also just like to say my section itself was actually brilliant and a very calm experience with a great team and straightforward recovery. Lots of my antenatal friends had really positive birth experiences too! Sorry if I scared anyone with my moaning, I don't actually have any trauma from my birth (hence pregnant again 7 months later ) but was just annoyed at not being listened to and a bit wary of a VBAC but keen to get informed!

Will read through properly late but I hope the spotting and bleeding it's nothing serious.

I've been feeling lightheaded on and off all day and now I feel nauseous. Really hope I don't throw up. Think I'll go get something to graze on now.