September #4

[Frillyhorseyknickers]

I couldn't see one - hopefully I haven't duplicated...

A weekend of centerparcs and I'm marshmallowed out!!

StarWishYes, I had EMCS with my last baby - long induction and he got stuck and distressed at 7cm, so whipped him out through the sun roof. By that stage i didn't care what they did, i'd been in hospital for 4 days and wanted the baby out!!

Although it wasn't planned it was a relative calm experience. Everyone was very cheery (despite it being 4am) I was in and out of the operating theatre probably within an hour..then home after just 1 more night.

Everything I've read has said that a planned section is far better than unplanned, you're not exhausted from labouring, so the recovery is easier. Having said that, my recovery was fine. I was up and in the shower about 12 hours after surgery (it was very painful, but I hadn't had a proper wash or washed my hair in 4 days and I had visitors coming, so was desperate!). i did end up with an infection in my scar but I think that's because I did too much too soon, I was stomping along with the pushchair the day after I got home and with hindsight should have allowed myself to take things a little easier, which I will be doing this time.

I wanted one again because it's the devil I know basically, and also I'm more worried about ending up in a similar situation. Having had a section before they won't induce me and they will want to monitor me constantly so I'll more than likely be strapped to a bed and each stage of labour will be timed, so if I don't do what they want me to do in the time frame they want then I'll probably be sent along for an emergency section.

I would far rather rock up at the hospital all fresh and clean and with my hair washed, go down for surgery and hopefully be home the next day than wait around for either labour to start on it's own (and end up with a late section) or an emergency section if labour starts sooner..

Do you mind me asking why you've been offered a section? Is this your first?

Also you'll get a date for the section, or at least a rough idea of the week they'll want you in, so you can plan better and won't be hanging around waiting for baby to make an appearance!

Thanks Olivers it's really useful to hear your experiences. It's an option for me because of a family history with very difficult labour and EMCS and also because I have a lot of anxiety around birth (due to family history). I was surprised they said that I could have an ELCS to be honest but they've said it's my choice between 1) natural labour on maternity unit (I'm not keen on this option as the monitoring will be less frequent), 2) natural labour on consultant unit but with higher monitoring and early intervention of any issues or 3) ELCS. I'm stuck between option 2 or 3 - part of me wants to let the baby come in their own time and to do things the natural way if possible but then I have this real fear of something terrible happening to the baby during natural birth (like it sadly did for a family member) and I just want the baby out safely. I've got a lot to think about...

I actually had an EMCS last time and have also been given the choice between MLU, hospital or ELCS too. I'm really struggling because although there weren't any major complications the first time (just an extremely long labour with no progress) I have anxiety and really don't know how I'll cope in the waiting time for labour.

I had an EMCS last time due to failure to progress and a big baby. I'm aiming for a VBAC this time because the recovery was very long and would be very hard with a toddler.

I originally wanted an ELCS as I was traumatised by it but I had a long meeting going through my previous labour and it made me feel so much more confident.

Haven't posted in a while but just caught up...

Regarding nct and hospital courses I did both last time - nct was one of the best choices I made as I still see the majority of the mums each week 2.5 years later and consider them some of my best friends. Best part of hospital courses was the tour of the units, very useful to have seen the place beforehand.

With regards to the elcs I am also having one due to complications with my last birth. Have had a number of meetings about it and consultant agrees its best option, the date will be booked at my next appt at 32 weeks. Will be having it at some point in week 39. I read this book which gave me a great insight into the whole process and recovery. https://www.amazon.co.uk/Caesarean-Birth-Positive-Approach-Preparation/dp/0956848001

I am so ready for this weather to end (SE England, 34c today ) hoping it'll cool a bit after tomorrow!

Showed up to the wrong NHS course this eve (mine's tomorrow). The midwife was amused .

Really interesting that there's a few of us with different birth options / experiences. I'm currently going to pregnancy yoga and when discussing it with them the other day I felt a bit judged for even saying I was considering an ELCS (but that was probably just me being hot and hormonal).
Anyone else with leg cramps in the morning and hot feet?

I fell off the thread again so just checking in!!

How are you feeling olivers? - has a specialist midwife contacted you yet? In our area if you test positive for GD a midwife specialising in gestational diabetes contacts you. I had my test last week - I've heard nothing back so I'm assuming all is well. I'm seeing my midwife next Thursday (first time in 3 months) and assume she'll confirm then.

So sorry you've felt so rubbish lules - this heat is horrible in some ways. Thankfully I've been able to do very little when it's at its hottest, and have been doing necessary housework of a late afternoon / evening when it's cooler. Did feel quite faint yesterday though when I was sitting with DD trying to get her to use the toilet! 15 mins in the smallest room in the house in the middle of the day!!
Fortunately the heat seems to have helped my SPD a little. Or maybe it's because I'm doing even less than I was. Either way, I'm happy that I haven't cried my eyes out in pain for a few days!!

All this discussion of C sections is making me think I should write my birth plan. Not that it was used last time (DD came very quick - no time for midwife to do anything!!). But considering the bad SPD I want to make sure my preferences are on paper and my mum and DH are very familiar with them. Last time I was put on a bed in a very awkward position (laying on my back but not supported very well so leaning on my hands) which made my contractions stop. I definitely want to birth either standing up or on all fours/sitting on birthing ball etc. I found those positions to be more progressive last time. Also they are better positions for my hips - I really don't want to damage them further!!

coldfeet oh I just got flash backs to DS2 birth when the midwife kept trying to get me to stay on all fours and hold the top of the bed but I couldn't take the pressure, it was too intense!! I kept going back to curling up on my side, gave birth that way too, didn't even know what I was doing obviously, and eventually she stopped trying 😂 DH said she got me up about 4 times but there was no need anyway because he was born in under 4 hrs so things moved quickly even if I would have liked them to slow down a bit!! Oh god it's all coming back to me again... hoping for another fast delivery this time, at least it's over and done. I have a little fantasy that it will happen so fast I'll be randomly in the shower getting ready to go to hospital and baby will come (nice and tidy hahah) but then I remember that I always tear and so always need an episiotomy as well... and I think no id rather not have a bigger tear, better not have baby at home by accident 😝 I just want a super fast, minimal pain and zero tearing labour. Third time lucky? Is it too much to ask??? 😜

Starwish I think there is probably some stigma over ELCS, but to be honest I couldn't give a f**k what other people think. I didn't get pregnant to have the perfect natural birth. I got pregnant to have a baby and the best way for me to get him here is likely to be a cesarean..Please don't think there's anything wrong with one if that's what you and your medical team think is best for you and your baby!

coldfeet feeling ok about this diabetes thanks. It's only been a few days, but I'm finding it very easy to control with diet so far, been testing my blood sugars for 24 hours now and they've all been perfect and well below the limits set by the diabetes midwife.

I will be having more appointments at the hospital which is a pain as it's almost an hour away (another reason to push for the ELCS!) and more scans to check (guess) size of baby. But I have the midwife's mobile number and a dedicated line to contact if I struggle. So I'm very happy with how I'm being looked after and would rather all the extra checks, than it be missed

So pleased the weather has cooled down, had best night's sleep in ages last night!

Star my main takeaway from all my meetings regarding the elcs is that you just have to make peace with your decision - do what you and the professionals feel is best for you and sod the rest of them. People are always shocked when I mention having an elcs - but they have no idea about my previous birth and some, often the older generation, have very old fashioned views on what a cs entails (my mum was ever so relieved when she realised that 99% of the time you aren't knocked out for them)....believe in yourself and get the book I suggested a few posts ago, it really helped me

Had my first growth scan this week - all ok expect blood flow to placenta a little low (placenta failure caused a lot of problems with my DD)....no real concerns just yet but will be keen to see how it's going at 32 weeks.

Agree with fluffy speaking to older people about cs, so many of them who've had one, go on about having a "epidural cesar" likes is a major deal...they don't realise that all being well, they are all done under epidural or spinal..

So many people don't consider the possibility of having to have a section in an emergency and think that if you plan one it's because you're "too posh to push"...to be honest I don't care anymore. It's what my DH and I have come to decide on and discussed with midwife/consultant etc and it's the best option for us for several reasons. I don't feel like I'm missing out by not having to push a huge baby through my fanny! I've also known people who've had worse recovery from tearing or episiotomy than cesarean, my recovery really was fine last time. For the first day or so it's sore, but it soon gets better and I don't mind the not driving for a while, as I want to be able to sit at home and snuggle my new baby..everyone can come to us!

Bit off topic but have any of you got any sling recommendations?
I was going to get an ergo because of how good they are at holding hips in the correct M shape, but actually thinking for the first few months I'd quite like a sling instead because they're quite a bit cheaper by the looks of things and look much easier to store and use (can be shoved in a bag when out and about if baby isn't in it)

I don't think I'll get to a sling library for quite a while after baby is born and it'd be nice to have something ready to go tbh

real I was wondering this too, thanks for asking!

I had a close Caboo with DD and loved it, will be using it again this time. It's like a wrap but with rings so it's very easy to use, no tying involved which I liked. I mainly used it around the house though rather than out and about.

I also had a connecta when she was a bit bigger but think about buying an ergo as well this time as you can use from newborn (with the insert) which I don't think you can with the connecta.

You can go along to a sling library before the baby arrives, they often have weighted dolls so they can show you how to put one on, put a baby in it etc. You tube is also helpful!

MrsY that's great to know I thought I'd have to trek down there babe in arms and all! I was wondering how anyone knows what to buy before baby gets here.

I'll have a look out for what's available. To anyone who can afford it the ergo baby IS amazing if you like buckled carriers, quite comfy to wear.

We have splashed out on an ergobaby 360 with newborn insert. Did get 20% in a mamas and papas sale though. We both tried it on (I'm 5 ft 3 and DH is 6 ft 2), with a weighted doll, in a shop and found it easy and comfortable so fingers crossed. I wanted something that would last and be sturdy enough for big walks. Very kindly, a lady at work is giving me her soft sling now she no longer needs it so I think I will use that at home in the early days.

Oh also just to let you all know, there's a few places to sign up and you get little freebies if you haven't already. Off the top of my head we got a teddy cow from cow and gate, a polar bear from aptamil (both perfect size to be little teddies for the buggy) and Mamia (Aldi) sent me a sample pack of newborn nappies and wipes.

They're just little things but sometimes this stuff can be really helpful, especially the nappies if you're not sure which brand will work for you.

Star my feet are red hot and sore heels, they've started going numb now too! Sciatica related I believe.

Is anyone's OH refusing to go to antenatal classes? Mine won't go and I'm sure I will be the only one there alone 😰

nut I've seen lots of women there alone at mine, that's nothing to worry you. But I'd tell him that my DH - who frankly can't stand these things usually - has gone and learnt loads about how to support me in labour/post-birth, and it's worth him coming along to one class at least to see how he gets on.

I'm a big sling fan, my experience with DS was a Moby wrap from birth to 10 weeks, a Lillebaby (soft buckled carrier) from 10 weeks to 12 months, then a toddler Tula from 12m to about 24m.

Now I'm pregnant I don't think I'll be carrying DS again, but we're thinking well do the same again this time. DS loved being carried, and don't have to buy anything new!

I'm torn about treating myself to a Sleepyhead or other pod type thing, because we're not having to buy much at all. But I've seen some threads about having to wean baby off it, so I'm not sure whether it'll be worth it down the line. Anyone else decided on this point?

Bedwise, I'm thinking of putting my mattress on the floor, having DS1 on a small mattress to one side and having new baby to the other side in the moses basket. Hope that'll work!

don't - sorry, total sling novice - are there slings that you can use from birth to 6+ months, or is it the norm to use 2/3?