May 2017 #10 - To be prepared or not prepared

[RasperryInAMelon]

Here's a link to the last thread and photo updates just incase anyone's looking for anything!

Thread 9

Photo Page - Bump Update

I don't have access to a desktop right now though so can't post the link to the GoogleDrive spreadsheet, but it's a few posts down in the previous thread!

Happy chatting!

Wow, it's taken me forever to catch up!

My fur baby is walking on 4 legs again, with no limp in sight! Think he must have pulled something, so a day and a half hobbling and he's fixed :) Thanks for the well wishes Badger :) stretch marks are around my belly button.

Been told I won't make it until May as I'm carrying low and so big (thanks for that, just what a pregnant lady wants to hear 🤔) so can't wait to speak to MW and see what she says.

Sorry to hear so many people are feeling rubbish again. Hope you all pick up soon and manage to get some happy/healthy days in before our babies appear and turn life upside down!

Looks like my few weeks of sleeping past 3am have vanished, and now back to being awake stupidly early, oh the joys!!

Low and big?! I had a massive bump and went to 40+19... Admittedly probably not too low though. Was that a midwife who said?!

Bright I keep being told I'm massive and my bump is 'worryingly low' my midwife just laughed and told me to ignore them. I figure she's the one with the qualifications not everyone else who feels the need to comment/attempt to worry me!

Morning all

Peach thank you I'm feeling a shade more human today and the course let me transfer to April for free-a relief...

MrsJw I want to curl up on that daybed!
We have a lovely old vintage squishy armchair arriving on Thursday that we figure will be good for feeding and cuddling. No lounge to put it in yet though, just a room full of builders sheets and rubble

Ticky, redblue, rise I am def doubting my original plan to work up to 38w...so tired, physically slow and not as mentally sharp as second tri. Only problem is I've just had 2 (desperately needed) pay projects land from a newish client that knows when I'm due, but wants to continue working with me...argh!! Calling in troups...or maybe I'll start using my 4am pre-baby wake ups to do some extra work

Power, autumn, wish- so sorry to hear about your mobility and pain problems. I feel physically rubbish enough, I can only imagine how frustrating that must be layered on top. Hope you all get some relief.

Bright good luck with birth plan/midwife. I'm hoping for some clarity today from mine on what they suggest given recent factors (low bmi, high amniotic fluid level, and placenta covering the exit!)

On general buying of basic equipment, I'm starting to feel a bit panicked financially. My dear mum knows we're strapped for cash and has insisted she buys us a snuzzpod.
She had a heart attack in late feb, and whilst recovering ok (we were very very lucky she was in surgery within 2 hours), I obviously absolutely don't want to go there now. I just want her to rest and not worry about anything.
I don't think I mentioned it on here-I just fell off the board for a couple of weeks to get my head around it.

So reason I mention it now is if anyone has any suggestions for tried and tested cheaper cots that attach to the bed, they would be gratefully received.
Funny thing is she'll probably be really annoyed if I get a cheaper one without telling her, but I don't want to trouble her either...can't win

How much is the snuzpod mighty? We are renting a bednest for £90. Sorry to hear about your mum. It sounds very stressful. So glad she is getting better

@lullaby23 I'm convinced he may be whisked off, but If that happens I'll send DH with him if I can't. Can you have Skin to Skin with a CS?

Off for a scan, another sleepless night worrying.

@mightymouse76 bless your mum. I use to be a cardiology nurse and any cardiac event is scary xxx

Thanks esme and nurse.
It's been a surreal few weeks.
Esme, Snuzzpod is 199, so bednest sounds like a great alternative thank you.

Nurse keeping fingers crossed for your scan today, hope all goes well x

@nursebickypegs definitely put that in your birth plan and tell your husband to follow baby. We ended up in theatre (forceps, or if that didn't work c-section) and as the 'trace' on baby's heartbeat hadn't been good the peadiatricians etc were all on standby so once he was delivered they carted him off (without telling us where he was going!) and as we had no idea what was going on hubby stayed with me in theatre - if that happens this time he's following baby!!

@savagehk thanks savage! All I know is "he will be checked over". I feel like they aren't telling me everything as they know I'm a nurse and I know what everything is. I'm also sick of everyone telling me "it will be fine". What will happen is it's not fine??

DH and I had a chat last night about me having a wobble. Not sure why I'm so upset these past few days, I'm convinced I'll be a crap mum or Bub will be poorly or that I won't cope. I've been right good up until now, really confident about my ability and that I'll love him so much. Now I'm scared I'll be useless.

Off to clinic we go, have a good day ladies xxxxx

Hormonal wobbles are normal in later pregnancy (heck, all through pregnancy really). You'll cope and you'll be fab, but remember if you do feel like you aren't coping get help sooner rather than later. I know a few friends who have had PND and - in hindsight - regret not getting help sooner. Your hormones will be up and down for a few days post-birth and with milk coming in (and again with milk stopping, if it's sudden), but anything beyond that get help.

Completely normal nurse it's all the hormones and lack of sleep. I hope all goes well with the scan.

Having a rare toddler/work free hour to myself this morning. Have gone back to bed with a cup of tea and Netflix. It's wonderful!

nurse yes you should be able to request it. DS went off with DH who was under strict instruction to do skin to skin and when I got wheeled into the room he was standing by the cot staring at DS not sure if he was "allowed" to pick him up 🙄 Maybe you can ask what scenarios might occur depending on what the first checks show? It must be very stressful for you but so amazing that they can pick this stuff up in advance so at least it won't be a complete shock

Agree with savage and also pre-natal depression is a thing so always worth checking with your gp or midwife if you think anxiety or sadness is causing you concern. Sending sympathy to all struggling, it's such a big change to cope with.

Mighty sorry about your mum, sounds scary can understand you not wanting to bother her. We got a second hand Next2Me on Gumtree, can't remember where you are but I also saw loads on eBay that we're collection only. Cost us £100 and Amazon have mattresses to fit for £20. If you're in a more populated area you might be lucky as some of them were as cheap as £50. Because babies are in them for such a short time they mostly look barely used. You might also get a second hand snuzpod but mattresses seem more expensive!

Nurse hope your scan reassures you today, I think it must be hard knowing the medical side too because you know all the things that could go wrong, I guess sometimes ignorance is bliss

On wobbles I've kind of decided I'm not going to worry about stuff... (if I didn't I'd be a gibbering mess in the corner) I know that's easy to say but I think to keep my sanity it makes me feel like I'm more in control if I decide not to worry (I'm a bit of a control freak). I can't (not that I want to) change the fact that baby is going to arrive, I can't control when s/he will turn up, I can't control who will buy our house or who will put our perfect house on the market at the right time for us to buy it. What I can do is pack hospital bags, plan hospital routes, give baby lots of cuddles and love when s/he does arrive and trust that everything else will work out. People keep saying your life will change completely when baby arrives and you'll think differently about everything and yes it will but I'll still be me and DH will still be DH so it's a whole new adventure, and we quite like adventures

Rise I live your approach regarding wobbles. That's very wise and well said.

rise you have the wobbles thing spot on. Once baby arrives you aren't in control. It will cry at inconvenient times, it will make a dirty nappy just as you are about to leave the door, you will be tired when you'd planned on doing other things.... IMO the sooner you make peace with that the better! Other parents will cut you significant slack :)

Scan went amazing. He's already weighing 4lbs and has a curl on top of his head! Heart condition has corrected itself so I'm thrilled.

Saw consultant today. Wasn't my usual guy. This OBGYN was horrible; she asked if I was my first appointment (ERM what?). She looked at me up and down and went "oh you need your GTT." I explained I had it, and my BM was 5.1mmols, she said I was just under and I need to go on a diet. I explained that to my knowledge it's above 6.8mmols. She said I needed to be weighed, and I declined. She went "well I'll make you then". I She took me in a room, wouldn't let me take off my huge dr martens and even though there was someone else in the room and I said no again and said "what about dignity for me and this lady?" She went "get on with it" & forced me. She then said my weight out loud to everyone in clinic. Back in the room, she went "oh it's different from booking" yes it is, because that was in October! She ignored me and went "your BMI is way too high now and you have gained too much weight". I've gained 6lbs and my BMI has jumped from 36 to 41?!

also, they have missed my blood levels for 3 months and I'm really anaemic. Got to have iron 4 times a day and a b12 in 2 weeks. Also gave me aspirin as "I'm so large I'll get a DVT". Wouldn't book my CS until 37 weeks despite my other OBGYN saying that I'll probably have it at 37 weeks.

Wouldn't book my next appointment as they are too busy. Explained I can travel to the other hospital and the receptionist said no I can't.

Just sat at home in floods of tears. Should be thrilled that his heart is better, but I'm so conscious about everything now and I feel disgusting.

Also there was a CAT in clinic that kept coming in and sitting on all the chairs, tables and in the clinics. Now I love cats but in a baby clinic....

Mighty, gosh you have so much going on currently,  for you and your mum. Glad they let you move your course back for free!

Nurse, I sympathise with the worries. I was talking to DH about how terrified I am for when baby arrives, I don't know the and first thing about looking after a baby!! But I like Rise's approach to the fear :)

My gym ball arrived in the post today, so nice sitting on and bouncing about a bit. But the fur baby is terrified of it (in fairness he's terrified of everything! 😂🙄) here he is pretending he's big and brave

Nurse, that sounds awful! I would complain about being forced to be weighed and it being said out loud to everyone! Very rude! And also about the cat! Very unhygienic! Look to the positives of his heart (yay for that!!) and try to forget about the rubbish horrible nurses

That's deserving of a complaint nurse. Can you take someone with to future appointments for moral support and help saying 'no'?! Can you ask only to see someone else (is the other obgyn better?). Do you still need cs as heart condition has resolved now?

@Brightsmoke I am writing an email now. I'm livid. I work so hard to provide dignity in care every damn day, and one OBGYN with an attitude problem can't be bothered.

@savagehk I'm going to take DH with me next time, he just stayed for the scan today and left for work. I've seen 3 different OBGYN now... and my
Midwife is leaving at the end of the week. Yes as I have perths disease in my hips

I'm going to go swimming to try and shake off my anger.

Nurse, so pleased the heart condition is under control, but truly disgusted at your treatment. I hope they are disciplined and you get better care on your next visit. I'm quite shocked by what you describe...

@mightymouse76 I'm so relieved by his heart being better. Such a relief. So angry at this OBGYN so I've just rang PALS. I'd love to say I was exaggerating but I honestly wasn't!

Nurse I'm really sorry to hear this. It is worth to give a feedback to make sure it won't happen again. Big hugs