Oi LG&T you gin soaked old hag...
Firstly.... ((((((((((((((((hug))))))))))))))
Crikey. I don't know what to suggest. DH's sister is an option but I know you're probably worried that you're labour will be super-fast and she can't get there in time. Do you have a kindly neighbour who could come and sit with the clan if you go into labour at home and alone? Plus, it would likely be so quick that you could put a film on and sit them in the other room for the duration! What about other family members? Could one come and stay for a week at 36 weeks? One at 37? One at 38? I know you'll be heavily pg and won't want the hassle of a house guest but it could be reassuring especially if they're willing to help out. I wish I lived closer to you! Please don't worry about shoulder dystocia now. You know the position to get into if it happens to try and remedy it yourself? On your back, knees by your ears- usually works- and if that doesn't work you just call 999. It is unlikely to happen though. And chances are, like you say, that you'll give birth in the night when the brood are fast asleep.
If you go into labour and are alone with the children and there are complications then the midwives would find a solution. They would have to go in the ambulance with you or one of the midwives would have to stay with them while they found somebody to help. This is still a worst case scenario, you are highly unlikely to have problems.
What if you call DH's sister as soon as labour starts whatever the situation so at least you know you have an hour until another pair of capable hands arrives? Would she be willing to do this?
Oh bugger it, I'll come and live with you and then the only concern is that we both pop at the same time.
No chance of hiring a doula? I know they're expensive but an option I suppose. Bill it to the Navy!
TYG- get making some stuff. The things you list should be easily manageable. Your nursery sounds lovely. Oh and not only do we all think DH is a dinkus, my DH is horrified at his behaviour too. In fact, I told him this morning about the lightbulbs and he said he wants to be careful his pregnant wife doesn't fall down the stairs- spooky. Are you alright? Take it easy and let DH grovel.
Ditto AM you clever old bean. I love the 'mural'. Bit pinky, but otherwise very lovely.
The two best and easiest things to do with lemons, apart from putting them on pancakes is to make lemon curd or make a lemon sauce (like a white sauce but with lemon added) to go on white fish. I like it with cod. Yummy yummy.
House hunting is a bloomin joke LG&T. I'm giving up and starting a commune. Quite fancy Ina May Gaskin's farm set-up. That'd save your labour worries LG&T, come and live in my yurt. You can make yummy food, I'll knit and crochet all day and the children can all run around in a meadow.