Due in February 2017 - thread #9

[twocatsandatoddler]

New thread - hope everyone finds this! I'll try and post the link in the old thread if it will let us go over 1,000 posts.

ooh twocats that's excellent! Yeah, I would love to try for the birth centre so long as I don't have any increased risk etc as things progress. So far, so good...I have to have the glucose challenge but my BMI is 30, and they refuse mums with a BMI of 35 and over....

One of my friends started at the birth centre but went on so long with her labour that the midwives transferred her up to the birth ward, for hers/baby's safety. It's good to know it's not 40-odd miles down the road in a different building.

I'd also like to try the pool....(did I already say that?! Brain.... )... I love being in water anyway, I'm such a waterbaby myself, that the idea of it seems comforting and relaxing to me. We shall see, of course!

kiki I have to have the glucose challenge at 28 weeks too, and my BMI was under 25 at booking. I questioned whether I need it as I didn't have it at Harlow last time, and was told it's standard practice at Addies now. It's a bit different from the glucose tolerance test as you don't have to fast overnight, but I guess it's a good indicator of whether you need the GTT as well.

Ahhh, I didn't realise it was standard practice, twocats! I was a bit annoyed at yet another thing to go in and do, but if it's for the health of me and the baby, fair enough.

Speaking of health.... have any of you ladies used chalk paints for any nursery items? We have an old chest of drawers in dark wood which need to be cheerier for his clothes, so I'm eyeing chalk paints as an option, with some nice new kid-friendly handles. I was looking at the Rust-Oleum make, but didn't know if anyone had heard of better makes out there rated for nursery safety? This one looks ok - and of course I'd confirm with the shop staff before buying anything.

Pretty much all chalk paint is safe - we have been using Annie Sloan for ours, and it's lovely!

You have to have bloods taken at 28 weeks everywhere I think, as they check your haemoglobin levels to see if you've become anaemic. Not sure what else they check as standard, but Addenbrookes definitely also checks blood sugar levels now. I think it's a 1hr fast as opposed to the overnight fast for the GTT but I'm not 100% sure as not had it before. It's a real pain for me as I'm not actually in Cam so it's another journey up the M11 just to have blood tests done, but I guess if it did turn out I have gestational diabetes I'd be glad I made the trip to find out!

Fenella I love Annie Sloan paint! I bought a cheap dining table and chairs on eBay and transformed them with a couple of tins of paint, so easy to use!

Arrrrggghhhhh!!!!!!!! Just spent half an hour on the phone to the benefits office as I received a letter today saying I'm not entitled to statutory maternity pay. After asking me about a million stupid questions including the gem 'does the baby you are expecting live with you at the same address?' I was told that I am not entitled to any benefits. When I asked, exasperated, why aren't I getting anything when I go on maternity leave the young gentleman replied 'well we're only basing it on what you are doing now to see if you qualify for income support' I said ' but I'm asking about maternity pay' and he said 'I don't deal with that - do you want me to send you a form?' So o feel like crying a lot. I don't think I'll get any benefits as I took loads of time off last year to do ivf.

Thanks 'divadee' that's really reassuring to hear. I made the mistake of Google erosion last night and got some mixed feedback. I was just a bit thrown because the midwife mentioned it as I was leaving the ward and the doc hadn't said anything! I have another cervical length scan later in the week so that's good (i had one large loop excision after abnormal smear). I hope you are getting on ok with your appointments.

In terms of names, we found out we are expecting a little man last week. I have found it really hard to think of boys names. They either feel 'too out there' or too common. We have settled on one name we both like which we're trying out. Neither of us are 100% sold on it but I am hoping it will grow on us as it's lovely!

I can't say I am feeling the cold but starting to have 'hot flushes' but then maybe it's just because aren't heating in work has been put on to the max!

In terms of sex, a couple of times a month perhaps. I'm not really enjoying it to be honest as worries about damaging the cervix and I am sorry of this is too much information but finding a lot much fluid discharge the next day after sex which makes me feel a bit anxious too as I thought it was my mucus plug one time! I feel like I sound like an anxious wreck writting on here! Happy relaxing thoughts to you all!

I also had a normal BMI and am doing the glucose test at 28 weeks. I've been told its standard where I am now too.

SBS here is the government guidance for qualifying for SMP. The time you took off for IVF shouldn't matter as to qualify you need to have been continuously employed under an employment contract for the 26 weeks before you reach the qualifying week (which is 25 weeks pregnant). I'm not sure when you started working or if you are still working but if you've been working continuously with your employer since you've fallen pregnant, you should qualify.

www.gov.uk/maternity-pay-leave/eligibility

Even if you don't qualify from SMP you should qualify for Maternity Allowance. The eligibility requirements are below.

www.gov.uk/maternity-allowance/eligibility

I find dealing with customer service / the government and absolute nightmare! If after reading the links you think you qualify, let me know. I know someone who works in this who might be able to at the very least give you the right number to call to get it sorted out.

Hang in there!

Thanks London that's really kind and helpful! I only started working full time in September so that might be why...

SBS if you've worked for a total of 26 weeks out of the last 66 even if its been with different employers and not continuously, you should still qualify for maternity allowance. Maternity Allowance is virtually the same as SMP so definitely worth applying for. You need to submit a MA1 claim form (available online) to the Department of Works and Pensions.

Good luck!

London hmmmm not sure if i have....might have to use our savings to live off.
On a quite gross note..... anyone having trouble with piles? Every night my bum hurts and ive just realised what it is! Only just come on this week (24/5 weeks)

You can get child benefits too SBS, I don't think there much (£80 a month I think) but I am thinking every little helps. Perhaps a phone call to citezens advice can help.

Oh and yes to piles 😳

Sparkles I've had them since my last pregnancy, they never went away . Not painful as such, just uncomfortable sometimes.

Please can someone tell me how to 'tag' peoples names. Ta!

Not having that problem (yet) thankfully. What can you do to treat it? Sounds painful.

Sparkles I've also had them since last pregnancy but they're not as bad this time because I've been making more of an effort to eat loads of fruit and veg and to drink a lot. Prune juice also helps but it's vile!
Newmummy you just put a * on either side of the name when you're writing it.

Just read this, which makes me rather worried!

www.theguardian.com/society/2016/oct/18/dangerous-and-unsafe-care-driving-midwives-out-of-nhs

I was speaking to a friend in Belgium and they get a specific gynaecologist and midwife allocated to them from the moment they find they are pregnant, right through the birth and care afterwards. They stay in hospital for several days, in comfortable private rooms with proper food, being shown how to care for their babies properly. Heard similar from friends across Europe and in Japan. Makes me concerned about the care here. We have been provided with little information so far, there seems to be no consistency, all a bit haphazard. You would expect as a first time parent they would spend some time talking you through the process of the appointments and what to expect as the pregnancy progresses. How are other people finding it?

oneroi I feel like I've barely seen anyone or spoken to anyone. had my booking in apt., 16 week midwife appointment and the 12 & 20 week scans, but apart from that have been left to just get on with it! For example I see people on here mentioning the GTT - nobody medical even mentioned that to me.

Sale here Fenella. I think it's really bad when thy know it's your first baby, there is so little support. I may bring it up at my next midwife meeting but I doubt it'll do any good. I asked at the first appointment if it was possible to meet the midwives at the hospital and look at the facilities and they looked at me like I'd suggested flying to Mars. Makes me very anxious for the birth, when I get very worried with doctors and hospitals anyway!

*Same

Too early to type properly!

We've just moved house so I actually haven't even met my new GP or midwife or anything - it's not helping me feel less anxious about everything!

Goodness me, that must have been an exhausting thing to do right now. It's such an upheaval. I hope it all went well? And that you find the services in your new area are a bit more helpful!

There is no 16 week appointment in my area so I'm seeing my midwife today for the first time since booking in. I'd rather not be stuck in a hospital for a week with a new baby, regardless of how fancy the facilities are. I did 2 days last time and by the end just wanted to get home to my own bed and start figuring out life as a family.

Gaaaahhhh, wrote long reply and it didn't post! . I know moving was a crazy decision - diva moves at the same time as me and we did question our sanity a fair bit!

6 weeks on and I am still waiting for a referral to the local midwifery team! Luckily I still work in London where we moved from, and kept my 20 week scan and 25 week appointment booked there in case!