Due in February 2017...thread #3!

[SkyLucy]

A home for all of us enjoying the surreality of the first trimester. We're sick as dogs, exhausted to the core, our boobs hurt, we've developed superhuman senses of smell and we're shirking all alcoholic bevvies with a variety of lame excuses...

...we're preggers and over the moon! Join us if you're due in February 2017 and fancy wisdom for the weirdness, support for any sadness, and a safe place where you can get excited about what the future holds, before you go public!

Third thread already (we're a chatty bunch!) Second thread here: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/antenatal_clubs/2662110-Due-in-February-2017-thread-2?

Bird don't know if it helps but I've been bleeding for nearly a week now and as of Monday everything was fine. Impossible to relax I know but symptoms sound positive and brown blood is probably old?

Have had my first actual voms today which I'm mega pleased about. Still bleeding but the epu nurse said the scans probably aggravated things so have an appt next Weds for another one. Hoping that symptoms getting stronger is a good sign.

How far along are you rocket? Could it be the time of your period? Some women still experience bleeding when their period would have been? Hope everything is ok on Weds x

I honestly don't get scared by labour stories. I've heard some terrible ones, friends telling me some really gory details but I guess I never thought it would happen to me so I never took it in.

It's like, I've never had a baby so can't even imagine that type of pain, so I can't get worried about something when I don't know how painful it will be. Plus I'm kind of excited to see just how I handle (or don't handle) it!

11 weeks today, so only 29 to go. Jesus!

Hi Londongirl83 I am diabetic and so the appointment is with a specialist or something....I've never tried to become pregnant and never had miscarriage or IVF.
My doctor told me I would have more appointments and scans than normal because being diabetic and therefore they will monitor myself and baby more closely.
I'm just terrified because of what the lady said on the phone!! I couldn't remember when my last period was so I think it's also to measure and confirm how far gone I am.

I have an appointment on 21st July for the midwife appointment and was told that's about 1 hour long so will see how that goes!

Haz really don't worry about the birth. I had what could be described as a bit of a nightmare birth with DS, and I am completely not bothered about the thought of doing it again. It is over sooooo quickly (it felt quickly for me even though I was in labour for 2 days, so anything less is going to whizz by this time)! And your body really does bounce back very quickly afterwards (and I had an episiotomy at the end).

Ah thank you carrie. I am excited to experience labour at the moment. I want to know what it's like! I know I probably sound crazy! But I am so curious. My sister's first was breech so she had to have a planned c-section, then had a natural birth (with epidural) with her second, and she felt so much better after a natural birth. I know every experience is different though! Blimey 2 days! How did you do it! X

The thing about birth is that there is such a huge variation in how things can go and there's only so prepared you can be. I know plenty of women who had complicated births, but if you think about it this used to be one of the most dangerous things a woman can do. That said, modern medicine means that even the most complicated births usually have a happy ending, and for every tough labour there's a ridiculously easy birth that actually happens as described in nct classes with a baby who is just b-r-e-a-t-h-e-d out.

Still, the only people I know who really suffered with trauma and had difficulty coming to terms with their birth story were the ones who had a strict plan for labour and had expectations about how things would happen.

So in a way it's good to know the gory horrible stories just to be aware of how things might progress. But if you think that's all that's out there you can check out the positive birth movement for less traumatic stories!

haz, that's interesting- my sister had the opposite (natural first birth, planned section breech baby second) and she says her second recovery was so much easier! Even sections can be hugely variable it seems.

I second not having a set plan and being flexible with what happens. I was very sure last time I wanted a water birth and definitely no epidural. I didn't ever make it into the pool because dd had pooed in my waters so I needed constant monitoring. Ended up begging for an epidural (it was wonderful) and having an emcs. Despite very powerful contractions I just didn't progress and dd was massive so I'm glad I did have to squeeze her out! My recovery was much quicker than two NCT friends who had forceps and tore quite a bit. I'm going to demand a csection this time too. I am of the view that as long as the baby makes it out safely it doesn't matter how or how many drugs it takes to get there!

Totally friendly I will be asking for all the drugs haha!!! Wow wispa yes you are totally right, no one birth is the same. I can't wait to have my own story to tell. You guys are absolutely right, we are lucky to be pregnant in this day and age and not a hundred years ago when the risk was so much greater! Even 50-60 years ago. Thank Christ for modern medicine (or maybe not Christ, thank science!)

God the thought of labour terrifies me, just the thought of a blood test will keep me up all night!

Dreaming once you've nine months pregnant you'll be fed up of being huge, impatient to meet your baby and want the baby out whatever. It's a long way off yet but however it happens it's worth it in the end.

Friendly I think you are so right about not getting toO caught up on having a specific plan. I am preparing myself mentally for anything.

Huge babies run in my husbands family (he was 11lbs). He did so much damage to my mother in law she didn't have any more kids for 10 years before finally realizing she was running out of time and it was now or never to have his two much younger brothers. These days, I'm sure a baby that large would come with a recommendation for cs, no? If I'm measuring large I'll insist as there is no way I'm willing to deal with with what my poor MIL has had to deal with.

On the other hand, I was born in 4 hours and weighed less than 7lbs. My mother intended to use drugs but ran out of time as the labor was so quick. She said it didn't really hurt until near the very end.

I definitely agree with what other have said about not having a set plan or too many expectations - you just don't know how things are going to go!

It took me a while to come to terms with my labour experience last time. My mum had three easy labours with no pain relief so I just assumed I'd be 'good' at natural labour. And I might have been had things been different - but DS was engaged at an awkward angle, so my body just wasn't going to be able to get him out naturally. I ended up with an epidural, induction drip, and ultimately an EMCS - about the worst scenario I could have imagined beforehand. I was a total mess on the post-natal ward as I was convinced I'd already failed as a mother because I hadn't been able to give birth naturally. DS had bad jaundice (just below the level requiring light treatment) and midwifes and doctors were a bit worried about him, and I blamed myself for that too.
I had panic attacks when I tried to reflect back on my labour, and generally was not in a good place (two nights of no sleep in labour, and a total of about 10 hours sleep over the four nights on the postnatal ward definitely didn't help me state of mind!). My DH had to fight with the head midwife on the ward to get me discharged as they were (understandably) concerned about my mental health and thought I was at risk of PND.

Thankfully over the next few weeks, once I had a bit more sleep and time to reflect on things, I realised how thankful I was to have a healthy baby and that the way he came into the world didn't matter at all.

This time round I'm not going to make a birth plan for my VBAC (assuming I don't opt for ELCS), beyond discussing pain relief preferences with DH beforehand. The only thing I know I don't want is an induction, but I think they're reluctant to do that if you've had a previous section anyway.

For any first time mums worrying about labour - I had a pretty awful experience during, and immediately afterwards but it was 100% worth it! Less than 18 months later I was willing to get pregnant again so that probably speaks for itself...

Struggling today ladies. Feeling exhausted. Puked twice.... feeling a bit spaced out. Eugh. An hour and half left at work and then I can relaxxxxx! X

I have heard gravity helps, my mum delivered standing up at home! My family have big babies and OH is 6ft 2, so I am bracing myself for a biggun!! I will just think it's more baby to love lol.

MrsM God how awful! Hope you are ok :(

I'm 9 weeks today and very nervous mama, I suffered an ectopic pregnancy last year so am worried about everything. I've had 2 scans already and we saw the heartbeat last week but your body makes you worry so much!! Sickness has faded some this week and I'm feeling like eating a bit more which is good. Love to all expectant mums - we are all miracle workers

:( I want to curl up and be in bed. I shouldn't complain, I know some people have it far worse. I dealt with the sickness very well this morning I think. The best I have so far. I am PRAYING I don't have this all the way through!

Staying in hospital until Friday 😥 But it is going well, and I'm hoping that this will be my turning point.

Yes yes to gravity! I laboured and delivered in a standing/leaning/crouching position. I went all hippyish and followed my instincts and they came out lovely .

Ah well you are in the best place scary. are you in because of severe m/s? Hope you feel better soon! Wow yes I will be trying the old gravity trick out then haha. Embrace my inner hippy :D

Those wondering about a water birth. I wanted one with my first but was nervous how Id be in labour so decided against it. Turns out I'm actually very quiet and calm in labour so went for it second time around. Absolutely amazing experience and definitely want the same again this time x

Anyone else feeling constantly thirsty?! We are so chatty the thread moves on at such a pace!

Sorry to those having a tough time x

theresa you've sold it to me! I really enjoyed both labours and my friends raved about water birth.

haz no, just for my ulcerative colitis that has completely gone out of control and I couldn't keep down my oral steroids because of morning sickness. It's calming down now- hoorah! Two more nights and I'm out of here!

Hello everyone. I am new to Mumsnet and to the idea of being pregnant so really please to have found this group! I am 7 weeks +2 and had a transvaginal scan today after a week of bleeding. Pleased to report that all is in order so hopefully can relax a little now before my 12 week scan next month.