Trying to make our fannies wider, Epi-no,no,no! All the pregnancy glamour of difficult shags, dribbly naps and pissy pants. JSers - encouraging food envy for 33 freds.

[DulcetMoans]

Welcome, welcome, welcome to the 32nd grads thread... celebrating the success of Just Shagging in getting us viroids upduffed!

For those that don't know, a 'viroid' is from the original JSing thread 1, where someone was trying to type ladies (in reference to all the JSing ladies), but their phone decided to call us all viroids instead!

The name stuck and we've been the JSing viroids ever since.

The thread we have graduated from is here in its 50th outing. WARNING: they're all a bit kerazy not to mention randy!

There is also a Just Mumming thread here for once your babies come along, or to keep up with the graduated graduates!

There is also a private facebook group (so it doesn't give the game away in your news feed!)... if you want to join to see photos of new babies etc, just ask in-thread!

Here is the stats list, please update your own spot with any updates.

looking I express about one feed a day for mr tee to give tiny tee his bedtime snack. Sometimes I can do more, I started expressing as soon as my milk came in, largely to ease the engorgement pain, but also to get into the habit. I've been quite fortunate that TT isn't too fussy as long as he gets fed, but that said sometimes he will refuse a bottle hands down, and only boob will do. Don't know why. I've been very lucky with bfing, he got on it almost straight away which was a massive relief,
but it is surprisingly tiring, and in spite of good latch etc, my nips are a little raw just because he's on them all bloody day still. (Lansinoh is on tap here...) Pretty much 45 minutes every 2-3 hours. And that's a good stretch, sometimes he continuously hangs out at bar chez boob for over an hour. Which is a hoot at 3am when I am falling asleep... but it's worth seeing his little milky drunk face

Lol Tee! I love the mental image of TT getting pissed on milk, propping up the bar night after night. Bless him.

Sore boobs ahoy!

Vomming and shitting ga, bad day! Hopefully today is a bit better. What's neighbour baby called? Inspire us!

Glad your mum has come round a bit tea. Maybe discussing alcohol-free beer was DF way of contributing to the discussion!

That's not crazy at all chat, makes perfect sense. I'm sure it won't be the last time either as little things remind you everyday. You are staying strong though.

Morning! I slept for 5 hours straight!

Yay for sleep!

Was about to tell you about the corn snake post la but see you found it! They don't bite, do they?

that person is completely unreasonable. She wants a charity dealing with cruelty cases, neglect and abandonment cases who are totally short staffed to drop what they are doing and blue-light yo her house to pick up a harmless snake that could be anywhere in house (or not) because she's not contained it. And she thinks it's bad that they didn't ask if she had a baby.

I'd like to see a corn snake try to eat a baby. They eat mice and are completely harmless.

That said though I'd be interested in listening to the call she made originally. Call takers are not meant to be id-ing snakes over phone.

I don't believe her version of events. I think she'd have been asked to contain it in the room by blocking exits or putting something over it and call back when she has. At that point they'd come and get it. They can't come out to every report of an animal without knowing whether it's going to be there when they get there as they have too much to do. Otherwise they spend their days on wild goose chases looking for animals that are no longer there (I have many times been called to pick up a swan or goose in the middle of nowhere that is no longer there).

But I'm just going to have to shut my gob and watch the haters slag them off. I've asked for my list to be removed as it might out me.

It's the big hunting vote on wed so the anti RS brigade will jump on that thread and I'll just get sucked in

And no I do t know anyone who's been bitten by one without having to really provoke it (or accident whilst feeding it). They are really placid nice snakes

I'm seriously thinking about not returning to work. I really love not having the stress

Yeah, story was a bit all over the place. I wouldn't have expected them to come out at all - not sure I would have thought to ring them! If I did I would expect advice, not action. I might have thought the council would come out but then that's normally pest control. I don't know, but it doesn't seem fair to blame RSPCA!

Oh let's not get started on the fox hunting thing - what a waste of MP time!

Right, I have been looking at positive birth affirmations on Pinterest;

• I plan to have such an awesome birth, Morgan Freeman will narrate it.
• She thought she could, so she did.
• You never know how strong you are until being strong is all you have.

And a Dulcet household favourite for many occasion:
Babies are like wizards, they are never early, they are never late, they arrive precisely when they intend to.

Hee hee Dulcet.

la not returning to work would be lush. Is that a possibility for you? My head teacher said to me yesterday that I need to return for at least three years. I said 'We'll see' and he was a bit . I will be out of three once mat pay is paid off, adios amigos!!

I agree - so many more things MPs need to do

Ok - so Morgan Freeman would be nice.

My one is always 'teenagers do it so I can bloody do it!'

Why three years pud? I don't have to return but we need the money. I've also worked my ass off to get where I am career wise but I'm pretty tired of the stress

We want to go home to Scotland and will do as soon as we get the money together

Yesterday I was sitting on my ball doing hip rotations and chanting 'rotate to dilate'!

I have to go back at least a year to not have to pay back enhanced benefits. I don't mind going back (hopefully reduced hours) but DH keeps talking about me not working. Not sure why!

News just said SNP will vote no la so that will help. I don't think it will get through.

I'm looking at childbirth like a roller coaster - once you are on it you just have to go with it. The only way to get to the end is to experience it. And probably about the same amount of screaming!

I like this one:

'The power and strength of your contractions cannot be stronger than you. Because it is you.'

Every time I get nervous about labour I remind myself of how many other women have done it and in fact how many are also doing it today or right now. Makes me feel less overwhelmed

When they were ramping up the induction drip I kept telling myself "I get to see my baby after this, it's worth it because I get my baby," that helped a bit

Dunno La, he just said it. Very much wishful thinking on his part because there is literally no chance of that happening. I was applying for non teaching jobs before I got upduffed and will continue to do so once I return to work.

Thanks tee! That's what I'm worried about if I don't introduce a bottle early - that baby will point blank refuse to take it. Dh's friend's baby is almost 6 months, they tried to introduce the bottle at around 3-4 months so his dp could have a break and go out without baby for more than a couple of hours, and the little bugger still refuses to take it!

To be honest although I will definitely give bf a go and my preferred option would be combo feeding using breast/expressed bottle, if it was a choice between solely bf (no expressing) or formula, currently I would choose formula for the convenience. Does this make me a terrible mum

I agree with pud in that be is rammed down our throats, but I suppose it sort of has to be if it is proven to be the healthier option for babies? I do think that women who don't want to or can't should have more support though.

Morning viroids. Lots of chat last night!

chat thinking of you every day in non creepy way

la I didn't see the corn snake post but sounds like the woman as a numpty. I love corn snakes.

Also I'm glad to see the SNP are going to stick it to the Tories on the hunting vote.

My friends friend who bf her little one couldn't get her to take a bottle at all so she had to do all the feeds! Poor woman!

la, dulcet and fleur will you all hurry up and do a baby!

My boss told me yesterday he's dealing with HR regarding my pregnancy but I feel a bit weird about not talking to them myself!

Oh and the sickness was back slightly this am! Joy

Pud I reckon your head teacher is worried because of how many teachers are leaving in general. My old school went from 10 science teachers to 4. The local middle school doesn't have any!

La I thought of you when I read that thread. Ridiculous. I don't think people understand what the RS is for!

Jelly I think you can request meeting with hr whenever you want normally? I met with them to make sure I understood the maternity policy as I wasn't sure my boss did (and I was right!)

Baby eviction day today!

Yay for sleep La

I've just realised that purplebaby boots me when my alarm goes off. I should stop snoozing it 5 times

I've been told not to try bottles til 3 weeks to get supply established and not to leave it later than 6 then do regular bottles. It was Wil who told me about it

Morning all!

I got all excited in the night as I woke up with pains and feeling a little damp - turns out I just really needed a wee and a little had already crept out

Just in case it turns out to actually happen, what do we do if our waters start leaking (as opposed to "breaking")? Does the 24 hour thing still apply? It made me realise I am not sure whether I would have to go in or not.

Other than that nothing to report from chez champ. Nothing at all

You should stick a pad in your pants Fleur and call your midwife. Leaking is still ruptured membranes, and they like to have something to verify it with

I was induced with DS and my waters broke just like in the movies, it was the weirdest sensation. Don't worry, it's one of those things that'll you'll definitely recognise when it happens. Like when your milk comes in!

thanks la i think i might just do that, I think i understand the policy but want someone to clarify it for me (and my boss hasn't a clue, I think i'm the first colleague he's ever had who's pg).

Oh and yay for baby eviction day!!! :)