Due June 2007... the new thread!

[NattyandThomasandBump]

got sick of how long it took my poor computer to load that mammouth page so i have started a new one!

oh and can i stay?

Thanks Doggus - got told the same at Boots, pharmacist couldn't even recommend one of their own products. Came home with big bottle of peppermint Gaviscon and it is RANK. Guess another of the joys!!!!

Doula - wtf? Something else I know nothing about. God I'm not very good at this, eating all the wrong things, taking medication I'm not supposed to and not a clue about what I should be planning and organising. Should have taken a course beforehand!

LOL Tallulah. I am completely clueless too. I had a surge of energy when I first found out I was pg, went to Mamas and Papas and was overwhelmed by the choice of pushchairs and baby baths. There's so much STUFF. Now ms and fatigue has taken over so I just lie around watching crap telly and stuffing myself (probably why I have got indigestion).

Taichimum --- Thanks for telling me your thoughts on the elective section. Here's where i'm at at the moment,

Reasons to have elective

Know exactly when dp needs to take paternity leave.
Know when i need someone to look after dd1 and dd2 for birth.
Dont have hours upon hours of labour so in theory is short and relaxed birth.

Reasons not to

I absolutely hate needles etc so knowing exactly what is going to happen weeks before it does will be absolutely awful for me, ill be dreading the day.
I won't be able to drive for 6 weeks after the birth so would have to get 3 under 5's on a bus to take dd1 to nursery (not an attractive thought when i can't chase them and buses very funny about the type of prams you can take on them.)
DP will probably only get the standard 2 weeks paternity leave and probably won't be able to take holidays as its a busy period for his work. Oh and he works away mon-fri so will be alone all day. Although mum will help out when she can she works till 5pm.
I want to be at home asap after the birth. With my sections i was in 4/5 days.

I don't think i could get the same help that you talk about, both my parents work until 5pm, dp's parents would probably take dd1 for a week or so but then she wouldn't bond with her brother or sister and i'm sure she'd protest and want to be with the new baby anyways and i'm sick of them just wanting dd1 and acting like dd2 doesn't exist, but thats another issue.

I may not have a choice anyway, as i had my lest section because my scar may have been rupturing.

TALLULAHBELLE - I was completely clueless during my first pregnancy also. I was only 17 at the time so i had really absolutely no idea what was going on. My m/w was very unhelpful and i always felt like she was judging me. So all my information came from the pregnancy book they gave me at my booking appt and i liked watching the baby progs on discovery channel. But then i changed hospitals at 32 weeks so got new midwives, they were lovely and i got tonnes of info from them. i didn't feel stupid asking them questions either. As it turned out i had the same ones for dd2 and this pregnancy too.

Also Gaviscon do an Aniseed flavour sure it's much better than the mint one!

Have my booking appt tomorrow and will get scan date then. Don't know why they are giving me a scan, i'm 12 weeks on friday but we dont have 12 week scans here unless they changed the policy......

Hope you are all well

Hello all - been a while since I posted so pleased to see you're all well (you know, other than the heartburn, the sickness, the tiredness etc etc). Been feeling much better for past two weeks (am 10+1 now), so have managed to get my life back a bit. Yay!
In terms of delivery, I'm thinking elective, too, but would really appreciate any advice. Saw an obstetrician who said that with twins an elective is the best option - he said I could try a natural delivery but the likelihood was I'd end up having the second via an emergency c-section anyway because you often find the second one is in an awkward position, and then I'd be exhausted from the labour, incapacitated from the c-section AND there would be two babies to feed... Whereas elective would be planned, straightforward, unstressful (??!!) and safer for both babies. My question is, how good is the aftercare generally? I'm panicking about being on bed rest, unable to pick up my babies and waiting in vain for busy midwives to feed/change them. My Mum and DH will be there to help, but not at night... And how long is recovery, generally? Does anyone have any good/bad experience to share?
ps, Annobal, am impressed by you having big night out. Nearest I get to that is falling asleep in front of the telly!!

Are people having 12 weeks scans yet. Mine is in ten days... can't wait.I feel so pg already tummy is round and I feel full. Bit scary as it is so early . Hope it is not twins....

Sarahsausage - understand all your thoughts on elective. I don't drive so I don't have that issue but I can see how the bus thing would not be much fun. Any chance you could do a taxi for those weeks after your DP goes back to work or is there anyone at nursery who might be kind enough to take your little one along with theirs and bring them back for those weeks before you could drive? Also I know of people who have started driving a lot earlier than six weeks. Not sure if they should but they did and it was fine. Also any chance you could afford a doula? Whatever way you go then you would have really good support. I can't afford it but I would if I could.
I know what you mean about the other kids being away and coming back to find a baby at home. I think my DS will be hopping mad when he comes back but on balance I'll take the risk. I appreciate I only have one DS to deal with and you have two and less help than I will have so it is a more complex decision for you. Good luck. Also Have you looked here www.vbac.org.uk/? Apparently the helpline contacts are really helpful and supportive.
Marylou -most people I know who have had emerg c-section recovered quicker than I did. I was physically exhausted before I even got to c-section and emotionally traumatised by labour which is probably why my recovery was slow (waters broke on Monday and had c-section on Thursday. I'm sure you get the picture). I physically shook for two weeks after, did not bond with DS1 for ages etc etc. However, I was still going out for short walks after about 7 days and four weeks later was walking pushing buggy up big hills. Everybody else I know seems to have recovered much quicker, carrying their babies after a few days like mothing had happened. I'm not saying it is not major surgery, just in my experience it does not have to lay you out for weeks.
Electives seem to have a good recovery time as you are prepared and have not got exhaustion of labour before hand to contend with.

In terms of after care, c-section or not it comes down to the same thing -which hospital you are in and whether they are understaffed or not (most are as there is a national shortage of midwives in NHS). My personal advice is to expect your loved ones to care for you and meet the NHS shortfalls. That means tending to your baby all day if you have had a c-section, bringing you food and drink you like (hospital food on the whole is neither tasty or nourishing and you need to get your enrgy back), taking you to loo, going to look for help if there is noone around etc. If you get good assistance from the staff then it will be a bonus.

At night there will always be staff on duty. If you have a section you will have a buzzer to call for assistance. Even though my after care generally was pants, people still came in the night when I buzzed to attend to the baby and many of them were very kind to me and my baby. A couple of things you have to watch out for though. Some hospitals make no effort with breast feeding. Several care assistants gave my baby formula while I was drifting in and out of conciousnes. I wish they had not. Secondly there is often a shortage of pillows and sheets. take your own. DS kept being sick and they had no spare sheets. Thirdly if you have the option to pay for your own room, do it. If often does not cost much, but will get you more sleep and privacy. My final advice if you have had a section would be to get the catheta out and get mobile as soon as they will let you and try and walk upright as you can, as this speeds up the recovery. I did not know this at the time and I wish that I had done. Then get out of hospital as soon as you can. I recovered so much quicker when I got home. And take arnica.
Sorry this is so long - this subject is on my mind a lot at the mo!

Taichimum, thanks so much for that - it was really helpful. BTW, my stomach is definitely round and it IS twins, so who knows!!! I've got my first scan on 4 December (first NHS one; I had a couple of private early scans which is how we discovered there were two of them...!). GOod luck with yours - can't wait to see mine again (the last time they were basically little blobs in a yolk sac, so not a huge amount to see!)

I agree with Taichimum....I felt pretty rough after my C-section, but that was after 60 hours with very little sleep and having been in active labour for more than 16 hours. But, I left hospital after three days (couldn't get any sort of rest there) and was out and about a few days after that. DH and I were living in different cities at the time (long story), so when he went back to work after two weeks, I was pretty much on my own and managed. I got a loan of a changing table with integral bath from a friend which was invaluable as it saved on the bending, and I was careful getting out of bed as advised (I had problems with my abdominal muscle not going back properly as well) Yeah it was tough... I remember walking home from the shops in tears with DS in sling and two carrier bags to balance me up. But, I got all the heavy stuff delivered from Tesco till I was driving again and it all worked out fine. One thing that I found good about the whole experience is that the fallout seemed much less than what my sister had to put up with after normal deliveries....suppose a lot of it gets suctioned out before they stitch you up (TMI....sorry all you first timers )

With regard to driving, I spoke to my GP when I went for my six week check and she said I could have been driving before that if I'd wanted and I should have come in earlier for a chat!! What was nice though was the feeling of freedom when I got behind the wheel and was able to leave the city again and not be reliant on other people for a lift.

So, all in all, if the c-section is elective, then the recovery should be quicker...I'm still not sure whether to have one or not (suppose it depends on what the professionals think after seeing my notes). I do feel that I missed out on a bit of the whole birth experience, being taken into theatre after all that effort and would like to try for myself. I'm not sure how fast I'd recover this time either, being five years older and much more unfit than the last time.

Sarahsausage...I think you should talk it over with your care providers before making up your mind....have you had a c-section before or were your other births normal? My sister was in and out of the hospital in only eight hours with her second so that's got to be a consideration in not having a section....and if this is your third, shouldn't you be expecting an easier time of it anyway?

I know that I'll change my mind more than a dozen times between now and June...sleep on it a bit and see how you feel in a few months. I'm sure we'll hear more on this topic as things move on.

Hello, just want to say hello to the recent writers and thank them for the honesty regarding c-sections as it's definitely what i'm planning this time around. The more I search for mother's opinions (rather than statistics, which can summarise too much and therefore be misleading) the better I feel. Not everyone takes 6 weeks to recover, driving is often allowed sooner than you think (check your specific insurance) and there are def benefits. If I were a first-timer I'd probably still want to try for a natural birth again, but now that I have, there's no way you'll convince me that it's the best thing! No amount of pelvic floors will help me now, IYKWIM.
Counting down to my scan on 1 Dec!!!! Hoping also it's not twins, or we really are going to have to move house!

My tummy round too. At first I was excited thinking it was baby bump but now realise it's the result of eating every hour to try and stave off the nausea and replacing my gym routine with lying on couch cos feel so sick and tired.

Had to pack away some clothes at weekend and bring out gear usually save for 'fat days'. When I said mournfully, 'Don't think I'll ever fit into my size 8 jeans again,'not so DH remarked, 'Did you ever?' Grrr!

Know exactly where you are coming from on that score Tallulah, Ive managed to do my normal exercise routine precisely once since becoming pg. Have resolved at least try and eat healthy things if I'm going to stuff myself but it's tough as the need to eat comes on suddenly and the things I actually feel like eating are limited, and don't include things like friut or veg! But I have realized that eating crap may not be making me feel better in the long run, so trying to make the effort.
Luckily I have a range of clothes in various sizes as I only just lost most of my last pg weight!

LOL, me too with the non-existent exercise and faux baby bump... though i gave in a long time ago and put the old maternity jeans on because they're just more comfortable. Don't worry about the weight, it's pointless because you need to eat and it will all come off later anyway, once you're running around looking after the little one. I think i fit into my skinny size 8's for about a week before I got the BFP though! Was straight back into the various fat jeans...

I haven't been to the gym in WEEKS. Am walking quite a lot, but I just get so hungry all the time - largely for things like belgian buns or eggs and buttery toast, and this hunger is not like any I've known before - I nearly stole pizza from my nephew the other day because mine wasn't ready..!! Get into skinny 8s in the morning, but by the end of the day I look about five months PG. But am not going to worry about it. Apparently breastfeeding twins requires 4000 calories a day. And if they both feed for the average eight hours a day ( Someone please correct me if I'm wrong), then that doesn't leave much time for eating. So my theory is I'm stockpiling now...!!

Yeah but Lilkel your DS is 7 months and my DD is 2.5 . I didn't manage to lose anything for over a year. It was tough and, just when I'd bought myself a mini-skirt to celebrate, wham bam up the duff again!
Marylou, I think having twins justifies you eating just about anything. Dunno where you got the 4000 calories thing from though, sounds a lot! In my experience bf made me even more ravenous than I was when pg.

I read it in a book about having twins (written by a Mum of twins who no doubt wrote it to justify the huge amount she ate during pregnancy!!!) But hey, it was in print, so who am I to argue?!

I think the eating thing is Ok. There are little other pleasures we can indulge in at the mo! I also took over a year to loose the weight and never lost it all. Like some of you others I just got back into some of my favourite clothes and now they are back in storage again already! Weight watchers once breat feeding is over seems to be most effective having canvassed all mum friends. Will defo do it after this one.

Besides the big ol' tum I have been feeling very strange in my lower abdomen, like all my stomach muscles are strained or pulled. Anyone else had this? I am hoping it is just that because it is a second pg and stomach muscles are wrecked from the first and the c-section and just can't hold it all in. This is a bit depressing if it is as I had a great strong stomach the first time and did not even look pg until about 6 months.
Also suddenly have nausea feelings and off my food and feeling crap when I have had no pg symptoms up until now. Seems a bit odd when symptoms are sposd to be going away now.. Seems I can't stop worrying even though I have done it all before. I guess until I see the scan (also on the 1st Dec) I won't be at ease. Lets hope there are not two babies on scan. I think I would have a heart attack

Marylou, just realised that you meant 4000 in total, not 4000 extra! That could be reasonable then.
I was like you Taichimum in that I didn't get into mat. clothes til 6 months last time round and with a bit of artful dressing nobody really noticed. Wondering how long I'll last this time though. I haven't had any strange feelings in my abdomen but I did get that funny sensation of having your ribs pressed out from the inside the other evening, and it alarmed me a bit as I don't remember getting it til much later on last time. Gone now though.

Also, what's with all these size 8s? You guys should count yourselves lucky that you EVER fit into size 8 skinnies

I agree. The thought of me in skinny jeans makes me want to laugh and as for size 8 I don't think one of my legs would be a size 8. Lucky you lot! I guess us bigger girls only have one advantage and that is looking a bit more in proportion when pg than the slimbos.However, it is a pathetic advantage and one I would happily surrender.
I don't even have the joy of the pg big boob thing, as mine were massive anyway and ironically my dh is not really a boob man. Don't you just hate wire free bras- they are utterly useless even the expensive ones. As if you don't feel whale like enough when pg without having your bristols sitting on your huge stomach!
And my hair is greasy

Are we not allowed underwiring then Taichimum? That's a new one on me. I'm the opposite of you in the nork department but still prefer them.
For what it's worth I have a wonderful image of you performing graceful taichi (something I always fancied trying) with your future bump and no greasy hair comes into it at all. This is the beauty of the internet

Yes, underwiring is out when you're pregnant, apparantly its 'dangerous'. WHY??? Unless having large bump to contend with means you're more likely to fall over and get speared by underwiring.
Topshop have some v.nice skinny jeans in black for those looking....
Anyone being offered seats on public transport yet? I am all the time, EXCEPT when tube is v.v.v.packed and you need it most. When its like that, people seem to bury their heads in their books and ignore. When tube is empty, seats get offered v.loudly so everyone can turn round and look. Am still at dreadful stage of 'is she or isn't she'. Read a great quote from Jimmy Carr in the papers re:the whole offering seats to pregnant women on public transport:
'Better a pregnant woman standing than a fat woman sitting down crying'.
I guess you can see their dilemma.

BTW to everyone - as we are all due after 1st April 2007 the statutory paternity leave has changed from 2 weeks - 4 weeks. Hurrah!

Hooray for 4 weeks' ... but will we get paid for it, that's the question!!

Ditto liking the Topshop jeans! Got two pairs of the maternity ones in dark colours. Size 12s (so my nice small size 8's are already def a distant memory!!). They have that lovely lycra in them somewhere though so it sucks you in very nicely. (sorry for mentioning sizes, i just worked so bloody hard to squeeze my midwestern-US arse into nice slimmy jeans that I treasure them quite a lot). Ah, well, it's better to be a slightly wobbly mother than thin but kid-free. Never thought I'd say that

Wish I had the problem of expanding bustline though. I actually had a co-worker, staring at my flat chest, (he was drunk at our xmas do) tell me "oh you're pg? But I thought you were supposed to get big boobs when that happened?" As if I needed further humiliation after all the push up bra discoveries with first boyfriends... (cringe) . I couldn't find a maternity bra small enough to work last time either!!

Good afternoon ladies

Just had my first appointment with m/w. She took my blood and I had the customary 10 minute lie down with "are you sure you are ok? just stay there as long as you need to". Ah the joys of blood tests!

Anyways, turns out i don't have any choice regarding the birth. It's a section and that's that. Apparantly I'm extremely high risk (having had 2 sections the last one 12 months ago) and i am out of their catchment area. I nearly cried. It's not a big thing for me to have a vaginal birth, i would jump at the chance to have a section if i didn't know when it was gonna happen and they just kidnapped me while i was out doing the shopping or something and if it didn't take so long to be able to drive/lift older children etc etc. But ho hum no choice.

On the bright side i heard baby's heartbeat. I nearly cried then too! Is there any need for us to be so emotional? I even cried at Holby City last night! M/w said section will be at 38/39 weeks, the later the better so if i'm at 38 weeks will be a may baby, if 39 will be a june baby.

My driving instructor said i'm more or less ready for my driving test, but that it would be after xmas if i wanted him there as he is away for xmas from middle of december. Told him i'd wait till after xmas, but then was looking on DSA website and found a cancellation for NEXT WEDNESDAY!!! How scary is that? There's only me, mum and sister tat know about it, don't want to tell anyone else in case i fail. Not even telling dp, he'll only try to talk me out of it as he won't want me using his precious car while he's away working. Oh and next wednesday is dd2's birthday, didn't realise till after i'd boooked it.

And i'm with sputnik i'm that you all fit in size 8s!! I'm a size 16 after losing loads of weight that i'd gained after Lottie. I was a size 20 and nearly 3 stone heavier than i am now.

Since getting pg i have put on about 4lbs, how is everyone else's weight gain?

Sorry its another long one, i never think i have much to say then i write an essay lol!

Hi all,

Fortunately we have 12 wk scans on the NHS - had my scan this afternoon - and there IS a baby in there - makes me feel much more reassured that I now have a picture! (Also sigh of relief that only 1 - think I would have had a heart attack if there were any more!)

I am also having mega probs with the weight gain - although I was a size 12 before DD was born - have not managed to get below a 16 in the 5 months since she was born. Think I will be the size of a house by the time this one pops!

Also having to eat exactly what I fancy to get rid of MS - which is generally chocolate, cakes (all unhealty stuff!)

Re: those thinking of elective CS - I would definately go for it if offered (although don't think it's v. likely in my case unfortunately.)
Had bad experience with DD - developed pre-eclamsia at 37 wks, spent a wk in hospital and ended up getting induced, which involved 3 days of v. painful contractions & ended up with forceps delivery.

Don't think I drove for at least 6 wks as couldn't stand up, had difficulty even sitting as so sore for weeks and weeks afterwards! I never imagined it would be that bad for so long afterwards!

Anyway being more positive, here's hoping for a better experience this time round!

Apparently with underwire bras the wiring can dig into breast tissue and damage the milk ducts. Armed with this knowledge, and sure that my boobs MUST have got bigger I went to M&S to get fitted. The lady was very nice as she broke the news that I was still a 34A and sold me a sports bra since I would never fill a maternity bra. Worrying thing is I read that your breasts enlarge in the 1st 3 months then don't change much until bf. Hoping for record-breaking growth in my final 2 weeks of first trimester then.

I was a size 18 a year ago, got down to a small 14, and am now dreading having to do it all over again. Even when I was 8, I wasn't a size 8!

I got my nuchal fold date - 13th December - a friend mentioned separate blood tests. Anyone know anything about this? As an elderly first time mum, I am anxious to have all the tests I can, without harming the bub of course.