April 2015 thread 2 for miscarriage survivors. today we are pregnant!

[TinyTear]

Thread 2
Nearly at the 12w mark for all and we can start some stats!

14+0

Me too tiny! I am so tired at the moment and just want it all to be over and be back to being me again. Hoping I get a bit more energy soon. I am glad I am feeling less sick and more tired though. Â

Little - I think sands could help with that. I think it is also a good way to deal with it by being prepared. I always have a plan of what I will do with each scan if it goes wrong. (Have learnt now to keep it quiet from dh who doesn't want to even think about the possibility of bad news.) Gave me a grin at the thought of going shopping at 7 am but in our house it is more often me waking dh up to not waste the whole weekend (but that is always after 9am).

Babiecakes - no lifting sounds tough. Annoying that it wasn't sorted before you were pregnant. The nhs can be so slow sometimes. Will you ignore them and lift ds nonetheless?

16+3

Tiny I'm so with you on the Christmas wishing, not even as a kid I'd I want it to be Christmas so badly.

LIG my DH is similar he thinks just because he says everything will be ok then it'll be ok. Easy for the guys to take that approach they aren't the ones going though it!

Babies please don't believe its a lack of trying or anything else on you and your DPs part, when autism is involved they won't do it until they decide to do it.
It sounds like you are making good progress with the walking.

Christmas then it's dd birthday in Jan...

No proper movement, just the odd flutter, but with dd only felt at 20 w...

17+3

I've only felt the odd flutter too tiny

Glad you're doing ok little If you think sands can help then do it - it's not planning the baby's passing, it's being informed and prepared. Anything that helps with your worries is a good thing in my opinion.

I know what you all mean about wishing time away - April seems a loooong way off at the moment.
Luckily I have a few things going on at the moment to keep me busy - nothing exciting, school viewings for DD1 who starts in September mostly, but it does help keep my mind off things.

16+1

Im with you all on wishing time away, I will be entering my 3rd trimester christmas week so am desperately counting down.

ive got my anomaly scan next friday and am getting more and more anxious about it, I dont know why, the baby is moving and has a strong heartbeat according to the doppler, my bump is growing by the day so I should be excited to see the baby right? Instead I just feel panic.

smiling I'm the same 3rd trimester over Christmas I might even buy an advent calender.
Those sort of feelings about scans us normal once you have had bad news at a scan you loose your innocence in a way its mo longer a fun trip to peek at the baby it really is looking for anomalies.

I'm sneezing a lot its made me suddenly realise I better work on my pelvic floor...

shetland Ahh the joy of school choosing good luck!

16+3

My friend is having her 20wk scan today, shes so excited, I feel so jealous that its exciting for her, im also very glad she hasnt had a mc and lost that feeling but I so wish I felt that way

im not sure that makes any sense but I know you will all understand what I mean.

20+2

Smiling your worrying is understandable as most of us here have had bad scans where the baby's heart beat was not visible/not beating etc. It's only natural but you should definitely be reassured by the strong heart beat and movements.

Little I keep forgetting to do my pelvic floor exercises as well - and I definitely need to do them. After having DS, things aren't quite the same there!

Nothing new at my end. I'm only 15+2 and wishing time away till baby becomes viable. Oh and I've got my 16 week midwife appointment next week. I hope that she can find the heartbeat easily and not make comments about my weight - I can't stop gaining weight at the moment :(

smiling I feel that way too, I wish I could go back to that excited happy way I felt during my first pregnancy. I used to get frustrated at myself for it but I have to accept it will never be that way again for me.
And while I know everyone loves their babies, I know I would never take this DC existence for granted. We know the fragility of life first hand.

*London I'm also starting to gain weight not helped by being inactive. IME midwifes are usually much more sensitive about weight comments. They have mentioned a few times to me that they might not find a heartbeat but have never mentioned weight.

I still don't have any midwives appointments, its almost like they have or gotten about me. But then again I'm not sure I want to end up with regular midwives appointments at hospital too, DH has to take time off work to drive me.

So what appointments are happening this week?

I have on Thursday the regular consultant appointment - hope to be prescribed some vitamin D and have a sneaky scan (last time they had these teeny portable scanners just for a peek)

Friday I am meeting the Hematology (sp?) department as I was on clexane the midwife referred me to it, but not sure what they will do as I stopped the clexane at 13w and will be 17+6 then...

I have my 16 week scan on Friday. It's a biggy as it's the one that should hopefully rule out spina bifida. I am very very nervous.

Shetland fingers crossed for you!

I have 16 weeks midwife apt next week.

Then I have no appointments till the beginning of December - Consultant appointment (4 Dec) and my 20 week scan (9 December - seems ages away!)

Babie I would love to think that once you lie down, the weight rolls back. I had a horrible experience due to my high BMI at my 10 week private scan. Lying down did nothing to seeing the baby more clearly!

Shetland Fingers crossed that everything is OK with the baby.

Ive got my scan on the 14th, obstetrician appointment on the 19th then midwife the first week of December.

ive got a bmi of 39 and the midwife hasnt said anything to me about it affecting hearing the heartbeat or scans.

hello hello!

Nothing happening here, Doubt is slowly taking hold again that something has happened to this baby, even though I have a bump, I am exhausted again and still thirsty alll the time. I don't feel under the weather or ill at all, in fact I feel good. So why am I doubting that anything is wrong? My 20 week scan is next thursday, not long to wait now but I would like it to be here tomorrow!

Sending lots of positivity your way shetland.

Hope you get a sneaky peek tiny!

I had a physio app today, I have regular problems with my neck and shoulders so it was my maintenence session and we were discussing what I can do to help prevent lower back pain and its basically all about keeping your hips tilted forward as our tummys are pulling everything forward because of the weight. ( does that make sense? ) I have been given a maternity belt by a friend and she said if it starts playing up to start wearing it, during the day rather than waiting for it to get really bad.

Hope thats helpful!

Thanks everyone :)

The problem with BMI is that it based on whole body mass, if like me you carry the weight on your stomach then regardless of cut of BMI it can still make scans and finding the heartbeat difficult. It was difficult to find DDs heartbeat at 18 weeks even thought my BMI was about 33/34.
But that still the NHS/midwives are much better trainned and wouldn't be so rude, I would be suprised if they said anything weight related.

shetland I hope Friday goes well.

lila I'm sorry your feeling anxious, pregnancy in our circumstances is emotionally exhausting.
I look forward to hearing how you feel about the belt. I'm getting regular PGP pain and I also have an old shoulder/kneck injury that although much better than a few years ago does flare up occasionally. I was thinking if it gets bad I might try out a Chiropractor.

I've got my cervix scan tomorrow, I'm nervous I don't know what I want. If it shows shorting or dilation then they will do a stitch but I'm now at the stage were they are less effective.
But if its fine and they do nothing the risk is when things do kick off is it being too late. I seem to kick off suddenly very quickly last time I had a good cervix scan 10 days before dilation and I only have scans every 14 days.
So I'm praying for a heartbeat and a content baby.

16+3

Little - will be thinking of you tomorrow. Must be so stressful.

Lila - I think the doubt is always there. After my 2 mcs both discovered before 10 weeks, I thought I would get to 12 weeks and relax but I don't think I ever relaxed with dd although it did get alot better after 20 weeks especially as movements were more regular.

Smiling - I am also jealous of the naivety of some people have. Although I think my 1st mc was so devastating because I didn't expect it. With my 2nd whilst it was very early I had built myself up for it to go wrong, so when it did it wasn't a shock.I see people in the waiting room for scans looking excited and I also worry for them in case they get terrible news that they weren't expecting.

No scans or midwife appointment for me till 2nd December when I have got my 20 week scan. It does seem a long time when I have up till now had something every week or two. I am starting to feel movements but not enough to reassure me - no kicks yet.

smiling, Little & LIG know exactly what you mean, feel the same. Always have a sinking feeling at the start of a scan trying to prepare for 'there's no heartbeat' again. Glad people enjoy theirs but can't help feel a little jealous/frustrated that some seem to take for granted it'll be alive. Friend just sailed through her 1st pg (at 43) but her blasé attitude throughout nettled me a bit even though I know no point worrying so maybe the right approach.

Realised I've spent 10 of the last 24 months 'pregnant' - or at least, not having miscarried. 3+3+4 now so fingers crossed for 3rd time lucky.

Good luck for tomorrow's cervix scan Little, & Tiny for you & I on Thu (just mw appt for me, hope she'll check for a heartbeat).

Shetland also for Friday. My obs consultant made me nervous suggesting that my '20-wk' scan scheduled for 19+1 might be too soon to see neurotube defects but if it's possible to rule out spina bifida at least at 16 weeks that's great.
lila hope the belt helps.

Oops, past midnight again (need to get a phone I can surf on during the day)! But almost snap Little, one day behind you 16+3

Good luck today little

Thanks, I know you are right, theres always a niggling doubt, its just that I am a lot more aware of it right now as we come up to the scan.

Little, I have realised that I need regular maintenece to keep it under control otherwise I am in [ain. IF i go every 2/3 months for 2/3 sssions its stops it becoming to bad and then needing 6/10 sessons. Good luck today.

18+5