September 2014 reaching the final stretch!

[ilovemonstersInc]

Last thread was full.
Some of us are in the last trimester and some nearly there!! Eeek not long left!

East I've signed up for lazy daisy, start in a couple to weeks. They lady I emailed got straight back to me with dates and a form - some must be more organised than others. However I've still not sorted my nhs classes, the leaflet the MW gave me has no details of how to actually book it and too lazy to find out for myself

Also having rubbish sleep and crazy dreams. Last night I dreamt the baby was properly pushing his head through my stomach so I could see all his features, eventually I could even see hair . I would love a full a nights sleep and find it really a tad depressing that this will be it for a good nights sleep for years to come!

Hey ladies.

Sorry to hear so many of us have aches and pains and bad nights at the mo. I'm finding needing to get up for the loo every 1-2 hours at night is getting rather annoying, and my back is still playing up. I just want to sleep!

After the short-notice cancellation of our NHS classes we eventually relented and signed up to the NCT classes next month. I was bit reluctant to because of the cost (£140) and have heard some really mixed reviews about them, but just feel so woefully underprepared at the moment. What with working full-time and life in general going on I've hardly had any time have been too lazy to read my pregnancy book or any of the birthing books / DVDs lent to me by friends. Plus I find I just seem to learn better from classes than I do from books. My only annoyance is that the course classes are set out over a week (one class every day or two), which is the exact week of my birthday (including my birthday itself), which me and DH had booked off work especially, and was rather hoping to have a really nice few days away together as it would have been our last chance as a couple for well, a long time, and there's no chance of doing that now.

Also DH and my brother have been re-decorating the en-suite this weekend. I am very pleased they are doing it but am struggling to comprehend how, given that the room is not much bigger than most people's downstairs loos, the mess from this re-painting project is over the entire house. Literally when I came home from work at the weekend, there was DIY stuff in the hallway, the lounge, upstairs, our bedroom, the nursery etc. The whole house is a tip, and I spent bloody ages last week hovering and cleaning the whole place. I think the plan is for them to finish it this evening and I'm looking forward to the house looking a bit more normal again.

Hope everyone else is doing okay. xxx

KitKat I feel your pain! DH is fitting a new bathroom and also decorating a bedroom atm... house feels like a bomb site. I'm hoping the end product is like one of those amazing paintings that looks like total chaos at first then comes together at the end and is beautiful... keeping fingers crossed!

Also struggling to sleep what with getting up so often and hip pain. Tried sleeping sitting up, well, propped up against pillows, last night and it was a bit better. Might be worth a go for you ladies who are also suffering

Inbloom I'm hoping the same! Am sure you are right and we will both have lovely looking houses by the end of it. It's very difficult though isn't it as I'm having to supress my inner desire to moan about the mess as I know they are working hard and some mess is unavoidable, and I've been on at DH for ages to make a start on some of our DIY jobs before baby is here. I just don't understand how re-decorating such a small room has resulted in the entire house looking like a tip.

Sorry to hear about aches and pains, I've has sciatica since 10 weeks and thoroughly fed up with it now.

I'm impressed by those who have nurseries coming into place. Still not sure what to do about ours in the long run as we need to swap the other DCs bedrooms about, the new baby will be in with us for the first few months so haven't worried about it too much yet.

DD2 is teething and I'm so tired today!

How organised is everyone so far? I had an order from Mothercare arrive last week with some bottles, sleepsuits and maternity pads, and got the car seat in the sale a few weeks ago. I still need to buy a new crib mattress and just a couple of packs of newborn nappies (we're using cloth, just need them for hospital), and my mum is buying us a Moses basket. I also need a playmat and bouncy chair but not such a desperate hurry for those, I really wish we hadn't got rid of everything!

Sorry to hear some of you are having sleep troubles. I have an arrangement of pillows which bring a different meaning to the word "nesting". Ha ha.

I have a long list of pregnancy niggles that, although I know baby and I are absolutely fine, mean I am seriously considering getting signed off from work. I tried to talk to my Headteacher today but wasn't getting anywhere and ended up crying and coming home. I was off Thursday and Friday after being very sick and thinking I might have had a bug. Today I was trying to talk about how I could cope better and run some ideas past her and I got a very concise response. I know I have lots of rights and the maternity guidance says adjustments can and should be made to my role but I just feel it would be easier for everyone if I wasn't there. Braxton Hicks, sickness, anxiety and a busy, oven of a school are not working for me! Anyone else feel like this or had any similar conversations at school? Feel very cross with myself for not doing better.

Sorry to hear everyone is suffering! I am feeling much the same - very emotional and struggling to sleep properly every night. Starting to feel very anxious, and as someone who likes to be mega prepared and in control, I am struggling to come to terms with the fact I won't be able to from now on!

Last night I had mega preggo rage when DP moaned at me about phoning the hospital about GTT results (though, they should phone me if there is a need and they also should have been available for the consultant in the first place). This was about half 11 at night - I got out of bed and kicked some doors and threw things around in the living room and DP had to come and tell me to stop and then I burst into tears, so annoyed with myself for behaving like that. Feel like I am a bad mother already for behaving like that with the baby having to go through it too.

Did the hospital tour yesterday and i'm currently also experiencing a lot of fear and anxiety about actually giving birth so I don't think that helped at all to do it when I was already feeling such a state. Felt like a total psycho.

This morning I got up for work and was in tears basically straight away because I was tired but still felt like I should go in. In the end DP convinced me to stay home and I got a couple of hours of sleep.

I'm annoyed at myself and feeling guilty because I feel like I should be better at being pregnant and enjoy it more as I do desperately want this baby, but feel like she just hears me screaming and shouting and crying and that can't be good. Need to get a grip!

bugoven would you want to be signed off just for a couple of weeks or for the rest of your pregnancy? Bear in mind if you're signed off within so many weeks of starting ML (not sure how many) they can force you to start ML early, therefore you'd have to go back to work sooner after the baby comes.

lilone remember it's just a bad combination of hormones, tiredness and reaching the third trimester where we're big and uncomfortable and generally getting a bit fed up. It certainly doesn't mean you're going to be a bad mum x

Hi everyone, sorry no time to read threads but wanted to let everyone know that mothercare have 30% off loads of stuff for today only, Ive ordered some fitted sheets and....The White company using code AD199 FOR THE NEXT TWO DAYS GETS YOU 20% off plus free delivery and Ive just ordered the most lovely looking cellular blankets!

happy shopping folks xx

lilone sorry to hear you are feeling down, but really don't beat yourself up, hormones make me feel terrible too and it certainly doesn't make you a bad mum. Here are some of my preggo meltdowns -

While pregnant with my first, my ex p offered me a bacon sandwich - and then didn't deliver. After waiting 45 mins for said sandwich, I stormed into the kitchen and started making it myself, slamming the bottle of ketchup down on the kitchen side. The plastic split and it all sprayed up the cupboards and tiles, so I threw it at the bin and missed and it exploded all over the wall. Cue ex p walking into the kitchen to find me sitting on the floor crying in what now looked like a murder scene. Actually making me giggle now looking back on it!
In a similar hormone fueled strop I yanked a kitchen cupboard door open into my face which gave me a black eye. Everyone thought I was a victim of domestic abuse when I explained I had bumped it on a door.

In my last pregnancy I got sent home from work because I couldn't stop crying. For no reason. It started at about 10 in the morning and my boss gave up and sent me home at lunchtime when she found me crying into a cheese sandwich.

The other day dh came home early from work with flowers and some treats and again I just burst into tears, it was ridiculous!

You're not alone, honestly, but if you are feeling really terrible talk to your midwife, there is such thing as prenatal depression too.

bug I hope you feel better soon, work gets really tough at the end. If they won't help you and you decide to call it a day, don't feel bad - you need to look after yourself and baby.

What a wonderful group of ladies =)

lilone you sound very similar to me as does your DP who has been telling me to stay home since early pregnancy. I read a post like yours and think "poor woman, beating herself up unnecessarily after trying so hard" so why do I feel so guilty too? I think this means we have done all we can and given it all we've got. About baby hearing you - if you are kinder to yourself maybe you wouldn't get into that horrible state, not that I think you're doing baby any harm just sorry you are so upset. Hope you feel better about it all or at least give yourself the credit you deserve.

teabiscuits your ketchup story has made me laugh out loud. I can imagine a collection of anecdotes being published called "Things I have done that I would like to blame on hormones" or similar. I did the same crying thing this morning, just couldn't stop!

Theonlyseven I am very lucky to work in a school so my work finishes 23rd July but maternity leave would not start until 3rd September, which is also one of the reasons I feel so bad and wish I was coping better. At 36 weeks my maternity leave could start automatically but by then it will be the summer holidays. I genuinely do not want to be signed off at all but also realise I am not helping anyone by being so unreliable.

Thank you ladies! Your kind words have really helped. And the ketchup anecdote certainly sounds like something I would do!

bug It does seem we are both beating ourselves up and trying to cope the same as we would pre-pregnancy, which I suppose is just not possible, and I think that is the most frustrating thing. I'm sorry your boss is not being more supportive as i'm sure there are adaptations that could be made to make things easier all round without you having to resort to getting signed off! However, i'm going on maternity leave coincidentally about when the schools break up (at 34 weeks, on 25 July) which is quite early but I already know I couldn't stick it out longer, and even that still seems like a lifetime away! You just gotta do what you gotta do!

Off to brave several modes of public transport in this heat to go to a meal for my brother's 21st birthday. On a Monday. Crazy. (I also feel guilty about going to this because I called in sick at work - like i'm being a naughty teenager and bunking off school!)

lilone I feel exactly the same. I don't seem to be coping, and the littlest thing makes me cry; with plays and concerts and prizegivings all looming, I feel totally overwhelmed for the first time ever and I just have turned into this sobbing wreck. It's not me and I hate it and I think people think I am useless. I told the head of part of our school today that they had made me look like a twat. professional.

xx

Hi all. just caught up on the threads. I really feel for those of you at work, this heat cant be making it any easier. Hormones are indeed flying about.

I ordered the relax and de-stress dvd as recommended on here and I listened to it on sat and thought it was great...my mum rang us sat evening back off her hols and my ds told her I'd been listening to an 'anger management' cd....cue us all laughing as Ive been very grumpy!

I was back at the docs this morning having bloods re-done to check white blood cell count so hope to have results on those tomorrow as I have an apt with consultant at the hospital- where Im hoping they will allow me a b12 injection.

Has anyone been to an ikeas sale yet, im wondering about going on wed. (by the way if you go on their website you can print off a ten pound off £100 voucher!)

When does the Ikea sale end? It's my favourite place for shopping! :)

My school have been lovely (im an unqualified teacher at an independent school) but just been on a PgCE placement that turned really negative in the final stretch after the hwad took a dislike to me. The highlight being the head telling me that she didnt think I was good enough to teach and that my approach 'may be very well for secondary but it doesnt work here' I did very well holding it together for the rest of the day but spent a good 2 hours sobbing at my husband after that especially delightful day.

Tea you've totally made me laugh out load - thank you!

nazly if you look into active birth positions - apparently tears are very rare if you are in an upright position eg kneeling, supported squat etc. This is what I am hoping for this time :)

Hormones are definitely making themselves known today! I cried a bit when I got home for no particular reason, just felt a bit too hot and tired after work I think .

Had my whooping cough jab today. It was super quick and didn't hurt at all. My arm is aching a bit at the mo, feels like i've been doing weights with that arm haha.

Sorry to hear about people's sleeping troubles. I'm sleeping ok apart from the frequent changing sides due to sore hip area. Sometimes I get up for a wee but sometimes just hold it in (and then my bladder will keep waking me up!). Our bathroom is downstairs and at the back of the house so it's a bit of a trek when you're sleepy lazy !

Tea you're pregnancy rage anecdotes made me laugh hehe! It's good to be able to look back and laugh but I know at the time how serious we feel!

Bug I can sympathize with you and working in school. I'm doing all right at the moment but I feel so out of breath when i'm teaching it's getting hard work. I just cant seem to talk fast enough! I finish on 18th July which is only 4 weeks but it feels like an age away! Just do what you feel is right. No point in struggling on if you feel it's having a detrimental effect on your health.

karigan Can also sympathize with working for an unpleasant head. The head at my last school was so scary and horrible she literally made your legs shake when she walked into your classroom! I think her style was try and get results by pure fear - not very inspiring whatsoever. I will get off my soapbox in a minute but I feel that training to be a teacher is so pot-luck whether you get put in placements with supportive mentors and teachers etc. Anyway I will stop there....... this post is mega long already!

:)

Oh forgot to say.. Nazly tearing during VB also terrifies the most, but I plan on trying this cream to use when doing perineal massage. This is the website where you can buy it: www.elastolabo.co.uk/pages/the-elastolabo-guide-to-perineal-massage

My mum (MW) says you could just use olive oil lol but says that the cream is worth a try too.

I think its all these fucking hormones getting to everyone now
Dh is being an arse. I've not had 2 mins to myself all day today. We are trying ds2 on fresh milk but he wont drinkit so hes not urinating properly so ive given in and gave him baby milk. Hes guzzling it down. I've only just offered him fresh too. I even put some sugar in to sweeten it up I know not the best thing to do but I was desperate. It was only a tiny bit like less than half tea spoon.
Dc wont sleep. Ds1 making noise. Ds2 teething. Dh is out. Had a bit of a cry and ds1 said 'someone eat mamas.donut' which cheered me up a bit. Mum saved me my fav krispy kreme and ssomeone ate it and ds over heard.

Just want a cuddle and be told everything will be ok during labor and that im doing a good job looking after baby and ds1 with all his sn. Hes currently pretending to be a dog give it 2 mins and thr baby babbling and shouting nonsense will start.

Sorry
rant over

About tearing. It does happen sometimes. I tore with ds1 as I had a shit midwife who didn't tell me to pant rather than push at the right time.
With ds2 despite all the other problems and him being oz of 9lb I didnt tear at all. Just listen to mw when they say stop pushing and breath or pant as thats when jts important. Same happened with my mum.i was there at her last labor and when mw told her to stop she wantwd to carry on but I kept shouting you will tear so don't and she didnt push and didnt tear!

I learned a perineal stretch at my lazy daisy class, start on all fours, bring one foot up by your hand, so your knee is by your shoulder (or as close as you can get!) then rock backwards & forwards, repeat on the other side. I'm not the most flexible so couldn't get a very deep rock on (!) but will try anything
I'm going to bed shortly, hoping for a better sleep.
Hope everyone else can get a decent bit of shut eye tonight x

Thanks top, I just ordered the creme... Joys of pregnancy, you would do anything when you are scared of sth, let alone ordering a £17 creme ... I also read in nhs website olive oil is fine, but then watched the add movie on the website you sent and decided to go for it, by the way, is your mum delivering your baby then?

Ilove I know what you mean, but isn't it pure chance whether your mw on the day is experienced and kind to help reduce tearing?

Deardina I couldn't work out from your description how I can do this exercise :( will google it...

Kath, that's interesting, I didn't know... But isn't it the case that if you have epidural then you can't really stand up or kneel while giving birth ? (Haven't decided on epidural yet but my pain tolerance is not good)

I'll have to get OH to take a picture if me doing it, you can all have a laugh! Haha!
Well I'm awake again, this time from a nightmare :( I can't believe I'm still scared of bad dreams, I daren't close my eyes!
Anyway, I'm hoping I can give birth leaning over a birth ball or squatting in the pool, this is my 'ideal' (my real ideal is that the stork brings my baby...) I know legs can sometimes go to jelly, but here's hoping! Anything to avoid being on my back.

Nazly with an epi your confined to a bed as you can't feel your legs either..I definitely want one this time. Im not doing this without it. If they have to work on mr again after delivery then at least I won't be in pain. Last time I was just given gas and air after delivery while they fixed me and it was bloody painful but was too exhausted to really care or say anything.

Most midwives are very trained mums midwife was very young and she was wonderful! I had a mw as old as mum and a student mw and before that I had a youngish mw and she was really nice too