November 2014- thread 4- 12 week scans and blooming in the second trimester!

[barmybunting]

Hi everyone, we have run out of posts on our last thread so hopefully we'll all find this one easily enough.

Here is to more positive 12 week scans and enjoying our second trimesters, all feeling more human hopefully!

Hi barmy! I dont know about that tbh but hopefully someone will be along soon who does!

Barmy five letters certainly seems overboard! The reason they test in pregnancy is that if you contract rubella in pregnancy (particularly the early part) it can cause the baby the be disabled (mostly vision, hearing and cognitive impairment) or miscarriage. You can't have the vaccine in pregnancy because it's a live vaccine and in the pregnancy state of slight immunocompromise there is a risk you could contract the disease. They give it after pregnancy to try to make sure you are protected in any future pregnancies.

Hope that helps?

Morning all! Eek it's scan day! Only two-and-a-half hours to go til we get to see our little bean again - am wavering between excited and terrified (no surprises there!)

Good luck to everyone else with scans this week and glad to see all the good scan news coming through on this thread

I'm loving the idea of a rainbow muslin collective too - bold and bright beats baby blue or pink any day so count me in!

A FB group might be nice a bit later on but only if everyone's on board (don't want people being left out on the thread) and if it's a private invite-only type group just for us, that way it won't pop up in friends' news feeds or anything. I'm in a similar type brides group and that works well!

Some really interesting points being raised about families and stereotypes/attitudes too - in this day and age the 'nuclear' family isn't really the norm at all and as long as the family is loving and secure it really shouldn't matter what the setup is!

Random - I'm STILL in shock about your postie's attitude! Un-fricking-believable!

Loving the rainbow theme of this thread and I'm so jumping on the rainbow muslin bandwagon. My old muslins are so grey and cut to pieces.

Barmy, I was told this too last pregnancy and it completely skipped my mind until after I'd gotten pregnant again. I'm sure I will get my wrist slapped when I EVENTUALLY get bloods taken at 16 weeks .

When I was pregnant with dd I was so adamant that I didn't want loads of pink crap in the house. Then when she was born everyone rushed out and bought her pink clothes anyway. I didn't care as much by then, I was so touched by the amount of people who thought of us and she was such a pukey baby that I was just grateful to have multiple changes of clothing to hand, never mind what colour they were! We also inherited a lot of clothes from relatives who were a fan of pink. I just relaxed about it. I do quite like baby blue - especially on girls actually, the colour is amazing on dd so she has a few nice bits in blue.

My friends have a little boy with the best clothes ever. Hardly any blue and he looks so cute and cool, wears a lot of green which I also love - also,he has those really cute baby boy tights.

Alita, sounds like you'll have no issue with your milk coming in if you're planning to breastfeed! Mine didn't come in til 5 days after birth (vaginal birth) so it was a bit nerve wracking, all ok in the end though.

Good luck amyrose! I have a sneaky ten week one I Saturday but a long way to go til the 12 weeker!

The only un stereotypical thing with me and my partner is we're not married, seems all my friends think marriage should come first, but it's 2014, we roll how we roll!

I find it so interesting to hear everyone's different set ups, so nice that so many interesting people connect through a thread, good old mumsnet! Is anyone else in Barnsley/Sheffield? I'm right on the border!

I'm not on FB so wouldn't be able to join a group, but don't mind if the rest of you do so long as you pop back now and then while I'm wittering on into the void!

We only got married last year when dd was 15months, amylou. I was surprised how many people were a bit...not judgy, but taken aback that we were having a baby first. Dh was raised quite unconventionally for times (won't say too much or it'll out me/him) but hilariously the result is that he is quite straightlaced now! Minus any chauvinistic attitudes thank fuck.

Thanks for everyone on the tips to get ds to eat- managed to get him to have a bit of custard and some smoothie thanks random for the tip can't believe I hadn't thought of that. Really not looking forward to work this morning but know it's the right thing to come back early for my students who have exams next week.
barmy I'm not immune to rubella either which was picked up on last pregnancy after ds was born I tried to arrange a jab but drs surgery were very incompetent so still not immune now! We just have to stay away from people who have it (luckily it is rare). My midwife annoyed me a little but about it as I am also resus negative she said oh you have everything wrong with you you're not going to be easy (not my fault). Is anyone under consultant care? I just had my appointment letter through to see the consultant so hope he/she is nice as had quite a few problems in pregnancy with dvt and an ongoing medical problem.
Loving the rainbow baby items idea!
Anyone with scans today hope they go well and all good news!

Hope all the scans go well today! one lovely thing about the scan that i didn't expect is that they're very quick to show you the baby straightaway. They don't faff about.

We were running late to the scan (traffic + husband needed to go to the loo 200 times before leaving, I'm already very prepared for toddlers clearly) so I was jogging through the hospital in stilettos at quite some speed. When we got to the scan room I took my shoes off before getting on the bed and somehow had cut my feet to ribbons without noticing, so I left a pool of blood in my shoes and on the floor. I looked like some sort of crack head.

Good luck anyone with scans!

oh dear miskate! hope your feet heal ok, surprised you were late , when I had mine I got there 5 minutes early and was waiting over an hour.

I really want to breastfeed due to health benefits, bonding, tummy exercise and the fact that formula is expensive :p but I have extremely sensitive nipples, I hate them being touched I literally squirm, is this going to be a problem?

Scan day aaarrrrgggh scared!!! Just over an hour to go- the whole things still feels very surreal.

I'd be happy with a fb group as it's nice to put proper names/pictures to people you feel you are getting to know. Will stay on here and use both though so that noone is excluded. Providing scan is ok, am happy to set a private group up if you like, then people can join if and when they see fit? What do you think?

I'm consultant led not that I've heard who this consultant is or when I'm seeing them yet! Nor have I had my physio referral through yet! Feeling quite meh about my mw still. She really does seem to be doing the minimum and not bothering with anything extra. I'm not hugely worried having had these same problems previously and knowing how to deal with them but if this was my first this "care" would be seriously lacking and I'd be screwed! I mean with the spd she's just like "Oh well, nothing anyone can do, tough luck" when I know there IS stuff you can do, there are ways to ease it at home, ways to get equipment you need, certain therapies which help, she's not spoken to me about safe or dangerous painkillers, no referral yet, nothing! I had 4 mcs before 11 weeks in the past and she didn't get me an early scan. She made a big hooha about me being high risk and having extra appointments and keeping a close eye on me and nothing, nowt, niente, nada, neicht.

Alita, I have no experience bf as this is DC1 for me, but I would have thought there is enough stuff out there today to give you the best chance possible of successfully breastfeeding - stock up on Lansinoh & nipple shields in your hospital bag?! Find a mw with lots of experience & patience too, so she can help you find the best & most comfortable position for you & baby to help minimise any ouchy moments. I would guess that after a while, the nerves 'get used' to the sensation & stop being so sensitive?

I would definitely be on board with the muslin collective! My DP (ironically given the current conversation!) actually owns & runs a DIY store which sells clothing dye in all sorts of funky colours. There's a really lovely emeraldy colour I've got my eye on & an amazing peacock blue.

Hope your feet heal quickly Miskate & you get the chance to stay off them as much as possible.

Good luck for today's scannee ladies!

alita I breastfed my ds for 6 months and my nipples slowly got desensitised, as long as you work on getting a good latch then you should be fine. Be firm with your midwives and tell them you want to breastfeed and they should help you with your latch.

Lasninoh was an absolute godsend and I slathered it on after every feed.

The scan went really well, I'm a muppet for worrying so much! It's all a bit of a blur, but they redated me as 13+2 instead of 12+1, so I feel I have saved myself a week of pregnancy grief but now have one less week to prepare! Nucal was 1.8 so happy with that.

This has all suddenly got so real!

Good luck to those having scans! X

I'm consultant led care. my first appointment with them is at 21 weeks!

greenstone I suspect we'll be given a lot of clothes that are agressively pink or blue.

But like that I'll be so grateful anyway!

And I've seen a lot online of Sarah Jessica Parkers twins, and she dresses them EXACTLY like I'd dress a girl - all multicoloured. In other words, even if they're wearing a pink dress, then they have rainbow tights on, and green shoes, and a mad cardi on. Its adorable.

So mix and match will be my motto I think.

Of course my friends warn me that after a couple of years the kids can get very bolshie about their clothes and start to demand "princess" clothes - all stereotypical pink and glitter. They pick it up from ads on telly, and other little kids, and toys in shops. And its either put your foot down and have a row at 8am, or give in and let them wear however much pink they want.

I'm not quite ready for a FB group yet, and had planned not to put anything about my pregnancy on there until after the baby is (fingers crossed) born happy and healthy. Might consider a secret group a bit later on but not ready for that yet, but quite happy for others to go ahead.

Good luck for scans! Miskate - hope your feet recover!

I'm also hoping to breast feed, but worried it's going to be hard. Will have to look up lots of local breast feeding support groups in preparation!

Try not to worry too much about bf'ing. The thought of it made me feel queasy last time, I really didn't want to do it, ex-husband said I WILL do it or else (he was a real gem) and I got myself in such a state over it. I tried it after she was born and it just worked! So I said for as long as it just works I'll do it. I fed for 10 months. However my boobs are fake which means that I can't feel anything internally (yay!) and although I was plagued with thrush and mastitis for the entire time & DD with oral thrush I didn't feel a thing. The GP actually tried to dismiss me and usher me out of the office saying I'd be hammering his door down screaming in agony if I had thrush and mastitis till I insisted he check them. At one point I was pumping strawberry milkshake instead of milk. If I could have felt any of it I'd have stopped immediately but I was very lucky and externally I was fine, no pain, no cracked bleeding nipples, all fine. And I only leaked a tiny bit once whilst shopping in Gap so I could buy a new t-shirt there and then luckily! It was all fine. I'd say plan to give it a try, be prepared with a small couple of cartons of ready made formula just in case and bottles which you'll need anyway for water and expressed milk, but don't put pressure on yourself or any expectataions, just play it by ear. If it works well and you and baby are happy, fantastic! If it hurts or you don't like it or its not working then switch. Even if you breastfeed it's ok to top up with the odd bottle of formula if you need to now and then, if you're all dried up, exhausted and baby is still hungry, don't beat yourself up and just do what works for you. There's no point killing yourself over it - happy mum = happy baby.

Anna if this is a girl and she wants to be princessy that's fine and I really love pretty dresses :D but I will educate her about princesses in different cultures and how they can wear any colour.
After all I will buy the clothes I can afford so she can choose from what is there :p

Happy scan news Miskate and bunny! It's true, it's amazing how quickly the image pops up, it's just right there bobbing around. I enjoyed it so much more this second time, with dd my bladder was way too full for me to concentrate on anything and it was positively uncomfortable. Good lucky to Tigsy and Amyrose, pop back and let us know how you got on.

alita, it can be painful yes for the first few weeks, but provided you get the right support, it gets better with each day and certainly with each week that passes. You can put Lansinoh on before a feed as well as after and that can help a lot.

books and Nessalina, hope you're both doing OK, haven't heard from you in a while :) Also I do hope that if anyone's lurking and too nervous to join that you feel you can pop by at any stage! I was far too nervous about everything to join any antenatal threads with my first pregnancy so just lurked obsessively. This time around I just thought oh to hell with it, what will be will be and now I'm on here all the bloody time

Spannertime - hope you're doing better too

annarose - we are lucky in that DD is not "girly" and made a decision herself to avoid pink from about 3 as she was aware of all the arguements amongst little girls at nursery about who got the pink cups / plates / spoons etc. She is the one who says "but all colours are for everyone" and her fav colours are turquoise blue and purple She loves dressing up but has a full range of outfits to be whatever she chooses to be. have to say tho' that she doesnt watch television with adverts and we actively counter gender stereotypes. I ended up dying alot of the pink clothes she was given as a baby to purple and blues.
some friends are having real difficulties with their wee girls feeling they have to only wear pink, wear dresses and have all girly items / clothing. I think it is really sad and so limiting.
Twiglet - love the sound of those dyes you can get your hands on. does he do online ordering?? The dylon ones are a bit restricted in shades / options..

bunnykitten - glad it went well for you

I breastfed DD up to the age of 2. That was not my initial plan but that's how it ended up. We did have alot of problems in early months and i know that some women find it easy, whilst others dont. I found it incredibly emotive when i hadnt expected that and was lucky enough to be able to access excellent support from specialist unit to get us through those early days. If you get your Bumps to breastfeeding DVD - check it out and you will see our story included ... DD loved to watch it recently and she remembers feeding very well. She used to bf her dolls - so cute!

Get your hands on as much info as you can, go to any BF classes if offered and think how you will get support whilst pg. I found the support on here fantastic - if i posted at 4am looking for help - there always seemed to be someone about to reassure and guide me. I will be eternally grateful to those Mnetters.

I used coconut oil for pretty much everything and the few times I did need to put anything on my nips I used that, didn't like the idea of using chemicals then DD sucking those chemicals off. I have a huge tub of the stuff in my bathroom and I use it for oil pulling, make up remover, body moisturiser, eye and lip balms, hair styling, baby balm, everything. It's my automatic go to stuff - nappy rash, cradle cap, dry patches, everything!

As for girly with DD I tried to keep her pretty gender neutral and she was always in jeans and some sort of punky rocky t-shirt. I did not want to ever encourage the princess thing and actively avoided it. She had as many trucks and builders dress up stuff as she did fairies and we read books about trains and firemen and astronauts and dinosaurs more than princesses but I think it's in the genetics because as soon as she hit 3 it was all pink pink pink princesses fairies and glitter.