THREAD 12 Jan 2014 - The one where we start mainlining raspberry leaf tea and festive treats for "the baby"

[fryingpantoface]

Thought I'd go for it

Anyone else waking to pee and then just being unable to sleep? Every night this happens. It's really frustrating

frying I'm getting that way which is so annoying. Only 4 weeks left at work though :)

Ok ladies can I have your opinions please.

I got woken up last night by quite a bad pain in my right hand side up just under my ribs. Only way to describe the pain was it felt like that feeling when you get bread stuck in your throat and you drink water but that makes the bread swell and get more stuck for a bit. Walking around didn't really help. Thought maybe it was a weird heartburn thing so sat up and leaned backwards but that just nearly made me throw up. Still niggling there a bit this morning. Wasn't helped by my whole upper back hurting as well (I'm assuming the two were unconnected but maybe not and it was my muscles in spasm).

Anyone any ideas what it may have been?

So just got out of bed and stood up and it hurts in my back when I breathe. Hmm maybe I've pulled a muscle.

Could be muscular. Sounds to me like the baby wedging part of itself up by your ribs. It happens to me quite often and it's really quite uncomfortable.

The back spasm could be related (ie if you were holding yourself differently and it made muscles spasm in your back) or coincidence.

What Toby said, yep!

Thanks toby hadn't thought about baby wedging itself as not had problems like that so far. Will take it a bit easier today and hopefully that will ease my back.

Frying I have this every night now. Went to sleep around 10-10.30 last night after many frustrated tears due to pelvic pain. Woke up around 12.30 to pee then was wide awake for hours. It's doing my head in!

Work have basically said no to bringing my mat leave forward Today sucks

Wasn't it only a week you wanted to bring it forward by, nature?

I wouldn't normally advocate this, but fuck 'em. Go to your GP and get signed off for the last week. Wankers.

It was two weeks forward. Really peed off. Considering how hard I work for them. Can't really get signed off as only have three full days of sick pay left (which I will be using). They have offered me part time but I don't see the benefit of that as I'll still be stressing about work and it will be a waste of a holiday. Feel utterly let down. They have said if I am really tired then I can leave but in a way that means I can't as it will be used against me at a later date.

How many weeks will you be when you start official maternity leave? Can you get signed off as soon as you reach the point (36 weeks?) where mat leave kicks in automatically if you're off sick?

Is there no way you could take the hit and take it unpaid?

When I start officially mat leave with the way my holidays are at the moment I will be 38+5, but leaving at 36+2 because of holidays and the bank holidays over Christmas.

Could take the hit but don't really want to get signed off as I don't think it would go down too well. As I am taking more than 6 months off (although only 2 weeks longer) they don't have to legally give me my job back just a job back so I didn't really want to be leaving on any bad terms.

I don't think going part time will work for me as I'll still be worrying about what is happening on the days I am off and the likely hood is that I will have a load of crap to deal with on the days that I am in. Just utterly disappointed, especially as I gave more than enough notice to change my holiday and mat leave dates. I've not replied to the email I have had yet but I will be pointing that all out and basically saying that I don't feel I have been given a choice other than to continue working full time till the end of December. So glad I decided to work from home today. I don't think sitting at my desk in the office blubbing would be a good look!

frying yy! Thats me every frickin night! DH comes to bed after I have been asleep for a while, wakes me up, then I have to pee and cant get back to sleep. Very annoying!

nature I agree with Toby. Sounds like when bubs sticks his foot under my ribs on the right hand side - really uncomfortable and sometimes so painful I have to rub to try and encourage him to move!

Cant believe they wont let you bring your mat leave forward by two measely weeks! Grrrr!

Just written my response email to my managers. Going to let it sit in my draft box for a while and re-read when I don't feel like crying to make sure I haven't been too over-emotional (very difficult after crappy nights sleep and in pain anyway!). I've basically just said I will stick to my original dates but want to work from home a number of days during the week and given they are moving to this policy from January anyway (and how I have gone out of my way to minimise the impact on work with all my antenatal appointments and the added stress I have been under) this isn't unreasonable! and means I can get some housework done during the days to reduce the amount I have to do at the weekends

Thanks for the biscuits sultana I may have just consumed a number half a large packet of bourbon creams who cares it is only 10 in the morning!

nature well done for not just pressing "send"! Are your bosses male? If so I have found I have got the best responses from keeping things concise. I dont know about u, but my first draft always contains tons of waffle....

Good luck! Really hope they agree. You totally deserve a "biscuit eating" day! Dont give it a second thought!

Sorry about the twatty bosses nature. Your proposal to work from home sounds sensible, hope they go for it.

I'm stationary on the m40, and two hours late for a workshop. Thankfully I have found some teacakes in the boot, so won't starve. Bloody bored though.

Morning all!
nature that is very sucky. I'm sure pregnancy related sickness has to be recorded separately from other sickness, otherwise it's sex discrimination. There's a fact sheet on the valuing maternity website here but I haven't read it fully. I get what you mean about not wanting to get signed off though...

Nature that's just rubbish. It's crap they they are putting you under more stress.

i thought you are entitled to the same job if you go back by nine months, but not at 12?

Oh enjoying there is nothing worse than sitting in traffic! Really hope it clears soon....

Frying I think it's at the end of ordinary maternity leave you are entitled to your job back (which is 6 months), and I'll be taking some additional maternity leave.

Sultana yes my bosses are male which is why I thought I would give myself time to calm down before sending (and also why they don't get why I want to finish early!)

MrsAVB my sickness is recorded separately so can't be used against me to get rid of me but I am still only entitled to the same benefits as everyone else, so once I have used up the number of full paid sick days they will be unpaid.

Today is just sucky, to top it off I paid extra for a something to be delivered on Saturday and it didn't arrive and just phoned the delivery company and they have lost it! Grrrrr!

Sorry about the woe is me posts today. I think I will eat the other half of the packet of biscuits and then I should be a bit cheerier or at least fatter

Nature that's rubbish :( it's not like you're asking to leave weeks and weeks early. Good idea with sitting on the email for a while and re-reading it later. I always find I ramble when I'm upset about something and it doesn't sound too good. I'm very fortunate that both managers in my office are female and have small children themselves so are very supportive. Also I thought they had to at least provide you with a job at the same level that you work in now once you return? Or are there different rules if you take additional maternity leave? It's all very confusing.

I worked out the other day that we will be £80 worse off a month when I return to work, compared to if I packed my job in and didn't have to pay any childcare. I can't believe it!

I am just sat contemplating if I should go back to bed or not.... Also I'm super happy as the mysterious missing soy sauce has been recovered! OH thought it was a good idea to put it on top of the kitchen cupboard where only his 6ft 4 self could reach it

The delivery company isn't DPD by any chance, nature? They are my nemesis!

Glad the soy sauce mystery has been solved, Felix!

I've officially started Christmas shopping today! Only the stocking fillers in Sainsbury's, but still...
I've also done a huge food shop, started soaking the fruit for the Christmas cake (I know, I'm late!) and cleaned out the fridge.

I knew sitting down was a bad move, though. I have a steak and stilton pie to make for dinner and have run out of momentum :(

Toby it's Yodel. Pretty annoyed about it really as it was a present for Dh to cheer him up and I had told him it was coming Saturday.

Yay for the missing soy sauce Felix glad the mystery was solved. I once lost a whole bottle of ketchup until Dh told me he had thrown it out because it was out of date! Thought I had been going mental. They do still have to give you a job on the same pay and responsibilities but it doesn't have to be your job, which means I may not be in the same team (although unlikely to happen). It's rubbish that you will be worse off for working, although I know a few people like that. Do you think you will consider staying at home?