Martians 2014, thread 13. Who will win, team pink or team blue?

[LyraSilvertongue]

New thread, hoes!

cookie my labour with ds2 was lovely. The mw completely left me alone to do my thing and right at the end when I was pushing she just stood out of the way watching and encouraging me until she stepped forward right at the end to catch him as he came out.

The thing that puts me off home birth is that if something does go wrong you then have to be transferred to hospital which when you're 10cm and pushing surely has to be the most hideous thing ever.

I had a nursing chair gifted to me with the boys and I used it for all the bedtime and night time feeds. I gave it away after. Won't be getting another. It was lovely and all that but a luxury rather than necessity!

Hi everyone - I'm back after a lovely weekend away visiting friends.

Interesting debate going on here about medicalised births and whatnot. Thought I'd chime in with my two pence worth...

I'm currently officially in my notes as consultant led due to the fact I was a late booker - I will get this changed over to midwife led at my next appointment at 25 weeks - I waited until my 20 week scan was all-clear so that I would have a strong case to argue I am no higher risk than anyone else now.

I am opting for a MLU which is attached to a traditional labour unit - for me, hospitals make my feel nervous and the MLU is lovely, modern and feels like a home from home - kitchen facilities, en suite bathroom and beans bags and cushions rather than a trolley bed + discharged 4 hours later.

I would have loved a home birth because I love the thought of being in my own bed with my new family straight after and eating food cooked in my own kitchen however for my first baby I thought it might be best to be near the hospital for peace of mine - I would consider this for subsequent births though.

In terms of medical interventions and drugs - I am fit and not overweight and there is no reason why I can't give birth on my own steam without a plethora of drugs - epidurals scare the shit out of me (hate the thought of being stuck on my back with a catheter in and risks associated with subsequent bladder problems, plus slowing down labour) and things like pethidene don't appeal in the slightest as I get nauseous very easily - I am even thinking gas and air might make me feel queazy.

All in all - without wanting to be either a hippy yoghurt weaver or a total hero - I know that I am aiming for a drug free, non medical birth in as much of a non medical setting as I can. Aiming being the operative word - I'll do whatever is best for the baby.

Well, she didn't say the sofa was unsuitable, just that it can be hard to find and stay in a good position for any length of time, and that she found herself forever rearranging pillows behind her back to try and get comfortable.

I'm frankly horrified with the idea of sitting up in a cold spooky house in the middle of the night. Hmm, I've possibly not thought this whole baby thing through

I was attempting to look sexy Cookie. It failed, admittedly, but we got a good laugh out of it at the very least.

lumpy that's exactly what sis said - 'a luxury not a necessity'. She didn't have one, but she would have liked one.

mrsk I wish my MLU was connected to the hospital. There would be no question then. Instead it is a 40 min journey away. Boo.

But the important thing is Jols did the knickers have the desired effect in the end?

Think we've got our scans about the same time tomorrow.

Fox there is a standalone birthing centre near me too but I'm much more comfortable knowing I am only a corridor away from all the medical facilities should either of us need them.

I've never heard of a breastfeeding chair - it's going to be the sofa here! Baby hasn't even got it's own room at the moment - we definitely haven't got space for a breastfeeding chair ffs!

I will be kept in for 24 hours after the birth to monitor mine and babies blood sugar levels. I freakin hate staying in hospital (not sure if I told you about my stay a couple of months ago where the woman opposite me just kept letting rip the most horrendous farts all night) but as needs must!

My uncle is making me a rocking chair to go in the nursery, which I will be covering with cushions. The chair is supposed to be a cheaper option but as he lives in Spain and I am going to have to get it shipped back I suspect it won't be! I am figuring it can become a family heirloom (he is brilliant at carpentry. I think I might be getting a wooden rocking horse too!). In reality I will probably spend the time sat on the sofa so I can watch tv .

Talking of the sofa, I can not wait to get home at the end of each day at the moment. I am so tired and work is really just an inconvenience getting in the way if me doing sod all. But DH is away tonight so I (a) don't need to wear stupid earplugs to drown out the sound of his snoring and (b) get the whole bed to myself. Woo hoo.

It did indeed Fox...I must get other men looking at my arse more often as I think his possessive side may also have played a part.

Are you feeling good about the scan? I'm a bit nervous but just want to get it over with so I know all is well.

That would be my ideal option mrsk but the hospital is just a hospital and the MLU is just a MLU, so it's one or the other for me.

Hottie Mamas and Papas have a reputation for horrific customer service, are you sure you want to get everything from them???

Cookie although the birth is only a tiny dot in the baby's life, its a significant event for you, there are plenty of women I know (myself included) who have struggled for a long time afterwards over how the birth went, be it physically or emotionally. It's not necessarily as simple as baby lives, so everything's fine (although obviously that's the most important thing!!!). Re cord around neck, DS's was, they just unhooked it once his head was out - I didn't even know until I read my notes!! I had continual monitoring last time and it didn't pick up any problems.

How r u feeling now Joll? You made me laugh reading about your flashing, and it made DS jump!!

I wouldn't have a nursing chair with no arms - baby's head is surprisingly heavy! I used to put a cushion on the arm of the couch to lean my arm on, it got DS's head to the right height to feed.

Stressful day - DS is coming down with something I think, my usually placid, happy toddler has been a complete nightmare today

I feel the same way Jol (about the scan, not about your arse).

I'm feeling alright Rock. Mellowing out a bit I think. Though still teary sometimes.

I'm sure many of you will have seen Co-op in the news? Well, that cluster fuck has resulted in all job vacancies being pulled and as a result, I won't be getting the role I applied for. (I'm sure I'll have to name change eventually...I'm far too open with you guys ). I'm actually relieved in a way. Can't quite work out why though.

Fox - I'd be worried (though flattered) if you'd if you'd grown a particular attachment to my rather sizeable arse.

I didn't know that Rock, thanks for the heads up! There wasn't any particular reason I started making my list with them, it was just the first website I went on. Are Mothercare any good?

Cookie, whatever kind of birth you have the MWs would want to monitor your baby's heartbeat regularly and frequently. People sometimes think that continuous monitoring is better and more likely to pick up problems than intermittent manual listening in but from what I have read, research has not found any difference in outcomes between the two.

Just been reading this on Which about pregnancy freebies!

Ah, Jolls and Fox you're my scan buddies for tomorrow! I'm anxious but excited at the same time. I'm sure someone else has their scan tomorrow too...?

On the birth options, I think we all want a straightforward birth in a safe and comfortable environment. The reason we find ourselves saying we don't want certain things is probably because we don't want to need them. Unfortunately labour doesn't always work out that way and that's not a reflection on the mother, just the circumstances.

I've been having weird preggo dreams lately but last night's was a nightmare and dh had to cuddle me until I fell back to sleep.

I don't really have room for a nursing chair in the nursery or lounge but I've got a v shaped pillow which you put the baby on to help. Ov I've not tried it yet!

cookie thanks for your understanding. This thread is not the place for long discussions about my experience, other then to say what happened is extremely rare. I'm really enjoying this pg now I can feel the baby and enjoying reading about everyone's choices. I'm sure you will be thinking carefully about your options just as everyone else in here is. Isn't it good that their are choices, I bet our mums had very little say in their care!

Back at work today, so hard to deal with these dark nights. I just want to hibernate!

Ah man I can't seem to copy and paste but what BakingEating said about how we dont want things a certain way because we hope we dont need them, I wholly agree with.

I am planning a home birth. Had one planned for my ds but last minute concerns about him being possibly breech scuppered those. He wasnt it turned out but I had a pleasant straightforward birth in the yospital. Ideally, Id like nothing more than to be in the comfort of my own home with midwives I have got to know over nine months. I am lucky in that I live very close to one the top hospitals in the country, and I know if god forbid, touch wood, etc. anything happened id be to the hospital in no time.

Its normal to me as I grew up with my Mum having my younger siblings at home.

That said, I'll do whatever the healthcare experts highly recommend. If I had to give over my birth plan and have all the medical intervention needed to deliver baby safely, then that's how it would be.

Anyway, here's hoping we all have comfortable and healthy births and babies.

Yospital??

cookie Yes it was me, well the first one anyway. Not the second however.

I had a chat with the consultant about MLU vs labour ward today, and she seems keen on the labour ward, but I'm not entirely clear of the reasons. The baby has a rare genetic condition but the consultant agreed with me that this is highly unlikely to affect the actual delivery process, or require urgent care soon after birth, so I'm not sure why it makes any difference. It sounds like it's more to do with getting the baby into their systems for seeing a paediatrician, also that the midwives might not feel comfortable about dealing with a condition they're not familiar with (although there's no reason they would need to do anything differently). I'm going to see if I can go and have a look at both places as she said the facilities are very similar, so if this is true and it will keep the staff happier then I'm not too bothered. My only experience of hospitals is with elderly relatives in geriatric wards so perhaps I've got a misleading impression of what to expect.

Floaty I just assumed that you were from Brum and 'the yospital' was the local accent. It's my new favourite phrase anyway.

I'm off to bed now. Utterly knackered.

evening all

birth choices.. interesting chat. Bc of my palpitations they forbade the midwifery unit last time but that turned out to be a good thing as after labouring half way at home all I wanted was drugs and whatever assistance the medical model can offer! it's such a personal choice though.

nursing chairs , yes to luxury. Couch & cushions & bbc3 for night feeds thank u v much!

tis my birthday today although I celebrated at the weekend. My mum's been here and has spoilt me rotten as have the boys. Got v excited at a sewing machine present. Have NO idea how to use it ... had an impulsive Kath kidston moment last year and bless my mum for being so thoughtful but I really. have. no. clue. Anyone?

Also found myself back at Mass again this Sunday and considering going more often with ds.

What happened to rock n roll?!! Someone please heeeeeeeeeelp! Turning into my mother.