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Original poster

Martians 2014, thread 13. Who will win, team pink or team blue?

999 replies

LyraSilvertongue · 22/10/2013 16:52

New thread, hoes!

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IceNoSlice · 27/10/2013 18:16

mrsk that is hard. But don't engage with the 'pregnancy top trumps' or game playing if you can.

Is SIL your MIL'a daughter or DIL? Hard as it sounds, I think it is different when it is their daughter having a baby, somehow makes it more 'theirs'.

Just enjoy your parents' joy in it all, and hopefully PIL/SIL will come round. I think I'd try to counter any negativity about your pregnancy/DC with 'won't it be nice having two children so close in age - they can grow up as friends'. And you might be in line for some nice hand me downs (though the gap would ideally be bigger for that - 6 months is ideal Grin).

Fasterkillpussycat · 27/10/2013 18:19

Liberuna - we have had no water since 8 this morning so my plan to hold off weeing failed some hours ago!

mrsksays sounds like you cannot win. It is not your fault she had problems getting pregnant. It could be a shared experience for you both but I guess she would not be interested in that.

mrsksays · 27/10/2013 18:21

Yep SIL is MIL's daughter (sis of husband) so obviously they are going to have a closer bond than me - but I'm not up for competing, never have been. I just wish I could fully enjoy the next 5 months without feeling the need to hold back. This little one may have been unplanned and a total shock to the system but we were only weeks away from TTC, so to us it's just accelerated things and we feel so lucky to have skipped all the TTC drama and I know I'm lucky to have escaped 1st trimester hell! I'ts very much loved and wanted and we are as excited as we would be if we had taken months of TTC.

I'm chuffed that we're expecting 8 weeks apart - could NEVER have planned it like that and it will be magical to have little cousins so close in age and will so so nice for us to give each other support when we're going through the same thing with 1st newborns.

Fasterkillpussycat · 27/10/2013 18:24

I would not hold back - if she is minded to make it an issue, she will do so regardless of what you do. Better that you enjoy your pregnancy.

mrsksays · 27/10/2013 18:24

Fasterkillpussycat Nope, she is mainly interested in being 'first", "bigger", in more pain, getting less sleep, being more prepared, rubbing it in that I am not doing pregnancy yoga, hynobirthing etc.. I'm self employed and just don't have the time nor money for all these extra curricular activities!

Fasterkillpussycat · 27/10/2013 18:38

She sounds delightful!

mrsksays · 27/10/2013 18:47

funnily enough we are actually really close and really good friends - but she is just so ruthlessly competitive with me for no reason!

Fasterkillpussycat · 27/10/2013 18:54

Hopefully she will calm down as things progress.

BakingEating · 27/10/2013 18:54

In which case mrsksays you need to be smaller, in less pain and with a younger, cuter baby. These things always cut both ways. However, I have cousins my own age and it is lovely, so if you can be friends then it could be so nice.

mrsksays · 27/10/2013 19:06

yeah we are being friends, i don't think she actually realises she's doing it to be honest!

MummyPig24 · 27/10/2013 19:11

Mrsk that's such a tough situation. You sound like you are being much more mature about it and dealing with it well though.

As if things aren't crap enough today, it has become apparent that dd has chicken pox. Great. Chicken pox at half term. What the hell am I going to do with 2 kids in our house for a whole week?!

Blockette · 27/10/2013 19:22

MrsK that sounds hard, espeshally when you like her! It's nice that you are trying to make it easier for her though, that's really sweet of you! I know some people would be jumping in and compeating back (if you know what I mean, that didn't come out right!)

Weather aside, I've had a really good weekend! Not been sick for the first time in 4 months, and got loads done! - bump and also appeared from nowhere so I feel officially pregnant now! Not lying anymore! - still no movement but MW side in the next 2 weeks I should feel something.

Blockette · 27/10/2013 19:25

Ohhh mummypig the dreaded chicken pox! - I've never had it and it sounds horrible! - hope your dd doesn't suffer too bad! (My brother only got 5 spots and hardly noticed!)

mrsksays · 27/10/2013 19:38

Oh gosh i remember me and my younger brother and sister all having chicken pox all at the same time when we were kids - the house stank of calamine lotion! Hope it's not too itchy and unpleasant for your little one mummypig

IceNoSlice · 27/10/2013 19:48

FasterKill are you in Brum? I read about a broken pipe or something at Frankley. We would have been cut off too if we still lived in our old house. Hope it goes on again soon.

Mummypig that sucks. There was a case if chicken pox at DS's nursery a couple of weeks ago so I've been watching him closely. So far no spots. Poor you - half term and no day trips, play dates etc. rubbish.

Fasterkillpussycat · 27/10/2013 20:01

Hi Ice - yes, I am in Birmingham. A burst water main has meant no water all day. Just starting to come back now, thank god. Desperate for a shower!

MummyPig24 · 27/10/2013 20:12

I had planned a trip to soft play, which is very rare now seeing as both children are at school and pre school, plus money is tight, but we won't be going now.

I remember having chicken pox when I was 5 but I don't remember my brother having it, although he must have at around the same time.

PiratesMam · 27/10/2013 20:37

Mummypig well the weather would put you off going out this week anyway so maybe it's a "less bad" time to get it! My two got relief from the mousse you can buy rather than calamine. DS hardly complained or itched at all; DD (younger) was pickled and much worse temperature. She had it second, and I heard from someone that it gets worse as it goes through the siblings!

Blockette if you've not had chicken pox, I really recommend you think about getting immunised against it - when it went around DS's preschool there was a mum who hadn't had it and she said it was SO awful - much worse as an adult. We looked after her kids for her for a few days as she couldn't even get out of bed.

MrsK I find inlaw politics so hard. And I don't even have it badly. All I can recommend are deep breaths!

The rain has started here, am really nervous about the storm coming! I really hope it doesn't tear off the temporary tin roof we have over the house!!Shock

PiratesMam · 27/10/2013 20:40

Mummypig ps if she's not too poorly for it then you can do playdates with kids who have had it or any that have it currently, if it's doing the rounds. Might break the monotony!

OwlinaTree · 27/10/2013 20:57

Ah, mrskay ti's a shame about the competitiveness. Probably pointing out the obvious but it can be hard to deal with people getting pg very easily if it's taken you a while or youve had a loss. Sounds like you are being very kind and giving her space. Once you've both had your babies it will probably be different and she'll really enjoy having you nearby to share the experience.

liberuna · 27/10/2013 22:36

pirate excellent idea. Chicken pox party!

mummy hope they feel better.

block I had chicken pox as an adult, it is evil. Took me out for two weeks, didn't know my own name for the first 5 days.

faster re: shower. Probably time to call in friends and family to use their showers. or the gym facilities if you're signed up?

mrsk sounds like a very mature attitude. I wouldn't be telling her anything. As long as you can look back on the pregnancy as a happy time and not frustrated for holding back then all is fine.

Coolhand · 27/10/2013 22:53

Had great afternoon out with a steam train ride for DS. He was so excited and was doing choo choo noises constantly in the bath tonight, then fell asleep completely exhausted, even better. He still woke up early this morning but we managed to get him to go back down until just after 6am new time, so not bad.

Pirates I really hope your roof stays on!

MrsK sounds difficult - don't hold back in enjoying your pregnancy though. If you can stomach it, ask questions like you want to learn from her, might make her feel a little bit better - she obviously needs to feel superior about the whole thing.

Good luck for scans tmrw - I really hope your scan goes ahead Floaty.

Mummy that is rubbish timing - hope it's a mild case.

Coolhand · 27/10/2013 22:55

Faster glad to hear your water is back on. We lost all water for 3 days a few Christmases ago - made me appreciate how much water it takes to flush a flippin toilet as were filling the cistern up with bottled water!

Blockette · 28/10/2013 04:51

So anyone else waking up in the middle of the night and not being able to get back to sleep? It's been an hour already :(

Omg Pirates!

MummyPig24 · 28/10/2013 07:41

Block I am not sleeping well at all. I had this in the first trimester, then I slept like the dead, now I'm struggling again.

Dd has more spots today, but seems happy enough and not too itchy. I have already issued a plea on Facebook for friends to come and play this week!

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