October 2013: Newborn snuggles and waddles to the finish line

[FeministInTraining]

Stats sheet here

New arrivals here

Key:
SC - still cooking (pre EDD)
SFW - still f*ing waiting (post EDD)
OWT - on way to theatre (CS)
IP - induction in progress
SWIL - somewhere in labour
LIT - lost in transition

...

I know karma... how are your contractions progressing? I had what I thought was one earlier and got really excited but it was a one off... so nothing to write home about... I also checked my bum crack earlier, inspired by your earlier message, and it looks depressingly normal... thought I should share it here... when exactly are you due?

pink very impressed at how organised you are and I love your little booties...! a couple of ladies here mentioned that the food in Guy & St Thomas is outrageous so I'm not holding my breath either. Hoping to stay there as little as possible

MrsH perhaps you just need another glass of wine? I always say that the best thing about a glass of wine is the second glass of wine.

shooting good your little boy is reacting so well to the baby!

I'm afraid nothing else to report here... other than my DS's continued obsession with death. We were trying to explain the concept of weeks and months earlier and told him how many weeks and how many months he's already been alive. He just looked at us in a matter of fact way and asked "right, so when do I die"?

....

oh pink, meant to say - the main problem with the new Bridget book is the lack of Mark Darcy... so one can't read and fantasise about Colin Firth... no more...

untitled my sleepy baby tips are
Strip to nappy
Play with ear/arm when their drifting off
Blow on face/ in ear
Drip cold water on cheek
Change nappy mid feed and then offer the other breast.
Hope it helps.

Sorry all the ladies who are SC or SFW and getting fed up.

Congratulations for all the new arrivals.

MrsH whilst Ailla has a good latch, I seem to be unable to make her 'milk drunk' very often at all. She falls asleep feeding, and then as soon as I move her she is awake and asking to feed! Especially at night time, which obviously is the time when I'd like her to get milk drunk...

I'm feeling quite detached from everything at the minute. I love my little girl to bits, but it still feels very unreal and like I am going to wake up any minute (it's been 2 weeks). I'm slightly concerned by how teary I still am and how much I don't feel like doing anything at all. Had a pyjama afternoon with Ailla and it was probably the best I have felt in a few days, but it still feels like it's all happening to someone else. I really need to get her sleeping in her own cot, this co-sleeping malarkey stresses me out because I can't fight the 'what if something happens' feeling.

I also keep getting labour flashbacks and I think it was more traumatic for me than I originally realised. It all happened so quick and was so painful (back to back, 4cm to 10cm in less than 45 mins and no pain relief) that I think it's only now flooding back to me!

Sorry, slight tangent there but my emotions are so all over the place at the minute that I am worried I might be heading down the PND route so I thought better to share my feelings here and that might make me feel a bit better! And yes, I have spoken to DH about this!

changing nappy mid feed is my tip untitled :)

my sister and dad arrived today yay! they brought treats from london and nigeria :). hobnobs, digestives, mints, even sausages for dh!!! plantain chips and peanuts from my dad! and some baby clothes and toys for ds. we feel very spoiled now. the little things in life :)

hey clapham. how re uou? and the heavy breathing? is ds s obsession an age thing??

legally thats brilliant about your dh and potatoes

are you using lansinoh mrs hn ?

will check in later xx

sorry x posts rox. i think sleep deprivation can make things very hard. m sleeps for about two hrs in cot and then after feed she wont go back. sleeps most of night on me. very stressful and like you am scared what if. i dont think ds was that bad. i do feel that maybe cos she was two weeks early and quite small harder for her to adjust to the world. try and nap during the day with dh bringing her to you for feed

chickie I've also added constant sniffling and occasional burping to heavy breathing - such a fine female specimen I am right now...

glad you have your family with you and all the little treats - little things in life are very important! especially edible little things

rox I remember that I hit my lowest with DS two weeks after the birth. I found that this is when the novelty wore off and the tiredness and sleep deprivation caught up with me. It got better later but, from personal experience, I found weeks 2-6 hardest.

Slathering on the lanolin. Had a short sleep (and no more wine) as teary turned into tears... Feel a bit better now and gritting my teeth while he feeds. I can't seem to get him to take a big enough mouthful of boob and his grip is unbelievable. I struggle to get my finger in to unlatch when he's on wrong.

and chickie yes, my friends with older children say they all go through this death obsession when they are 5-6. It's really funny actually (although disturbing at times). He is so matter of fact about it. I mist say we painted a very beautiful picture of the afterlife... it features: marshmallows, ice-cream, lots of cars, lego etc... not sure if this is the right way forward but haven't figured another way yet...

mrsH ouch... poor you... I still remember this pain... but your nipples will toughen up over time and it won't hurt forever. I promise you. I know I might have lost all credibility now with the afterlife stories I'm telling DS... but trust me, it gets better and totally painless eventually

Thanks all for the tips!

Still in hospital with LO and a very sore c-section wound! Bless him; he's very mucousy and struggling to sleep/lie down because he keeps retching :(

I'm just not cut out for this having a baby lark. I definately did not feel like this with my first baby!

Oh dear Nat sorry you are feeling this way. Have you told dh how you feel? Do you think you aren't bonding with him for a particular reason? Hugs for you xxx

Oh dear natalie is it the sheer exhaustingness of it all or something more?
Little B finally slept from 1 until now and he's feeding again but he literally did not detach from my boob from 9-1am last night. I thought he was perhaps a vampire baby
Hoping to get out today so we can at least be exhausted in the comfort of our own home.
Seeing as I've got time I'll start my birth story......

So waters broke on Thursday morning. Not a dramatic gush but a definite soaking. Phoned triage who said go in to be sure. Fed ds brekkie and then popped along and they confirmed yes waters, mild contractions started about lunchtime. Decided to pop to john lewis and get some last minute bits and bobs so headed off with my mum. Contractions getting stronger but still not too bad. Have a normal day really until midnight when things get too painful to sleep through. 6am go back to hospital and am pretty sure I must have dilated a bit- exam shows 1cm! Am clearly a big wuss and these contractions are not strong at all. My consultant arrives at 7 and advises as it's now over 24 hrs since waters broke we need to either be in active labour or doing a cs. Also apparently my blood count slightly high so they are querying infection. Also baby is back to back which gives an increased chance of emcs and forceps/ventouse. I decide to carry on for a bit so he disappears until 10. Reexamined at 10am and no cervix change. Consultant thinks my chances of successful vbac are less than 20% so DH and I decide a cs now would be better than an emergency one later in the day.
So that's that cs was calm and as good as it could be. Same scar used as last time, same plastic surgeons stitches so hopefully scar will be invisible again. Ds2 was pulled out screaming, delayed cord clamping, he wee'd twice on the paediatrician and was given straight to me for skin to skin whilst I got stitched up. Fed for hours in recovery room and then slept all afternoon and most of the night. He was checked every two hours by paediatricians incase of infection but he passed with flying colours and has been signed off to go home just waiting for me to be signed off.
So not my planned vbac but a safe arrival for my gorgeous boy and as he was 8lb 12oz my consultant said its better really that he was a section as that's pretty big

Congrats again shooting, labour and babies often don't seem to go as planned, but glad it was a calm and positive experience in the end.
to all with sleeping/feeding/bonding issues.
SFW at 41 weeks. The babycentre app has given up on me and told me 'congratulations on your newborn'

I have missed so maby births but Congratulations to you all! Loving the pictures on Facebook.

shooting glad all was well in the end.

Hugs to roxvox and nat I dont really have any advice other than to make people close to you aware of how your feeling as you already have rox. Are you day 3-5 nat? could it patially be baby blues making you feel so rubbish this morning? also still very teary here and struggling with the anxiety over whether im giving enough time to either DS or DD.

Hope things pick up soon pink

Sending to all SFW and to all struggling with feeding and non sleeping babies.

started infacol yesterday as Isla so uncomfortable after every feed. it seems to be working but have had a couple of ridiculous projectile vomits so worrying she might not actually be keeping much down. shes alzo just slept for 7 hrs and midwife told me not to let her go for more than 6 so now feeling like im an awful mother. shes back to sleep now after both boobs so hopefully is full but did have a large vomit half way through. eugh its never simple is it!

Good Luck to anyone SWIL!

SWIL

oooh exciting pink

Did your waters go? Tell all (and good luck)

Go Pink!

Good luck PinkBpys! Buttons, Alice is still puking ( sometimes with an incredible projectile range) after about half her feeds. I was also worried about her not keeping enough down but she has produced 3 dirty nappies since midnight so is definitely getting enough - my lovely midwife was not at all pushy with weight gain, just said if they are peeing and pooing a lot then they ate getting enough food. Also, I think when the sick is all spread out over baby/ you/ nice clean Moses basket/ sofa that it looks like alot but isn't really. Good luck to anyone I have missed who is SWIL or SFW.

Yay pink - best of luck!

agree with not being able to tell how much baby is throwing up, I think it does often seem more than it is!!
pinkforboys glad things are happening for you. good luck!!
nat how are you now? do you think its hormones etc or something a bit more?
I've definitley struggled with becoming a mum more than I thought I would, but I'm getting there and bonding with H more every day. We're at day 16 today and its getting better!

Yay Pink

Sanjifair the same happened to me and I sent them a shitty email about it. I was sooooooo cross that there was no acknowledgement that you might be completely beached and fed up. Then, the only way I could work out to stop the emails was to "remove child from family" and then they flashed up a message about dealing with stillbirth

Yay pink look forward to hearing your news later.

I hate breast feeding I'm finding it so hard and difficult. I'm trying so hard to get it right but it's just not happening.

Some midwife was horrible to me yesterday and insinuated I wasn't trying hard enough, I burst into tears, plus dp's mum bf all her 4 children she said to dp "you must keep encouraging her to bf" I feel under so much pressure to perform. I'm expressing 4 times a day and dread feeding times, it's getting me all anxious and stressed. My nipples kill and that lanisosh does nothing to soothe them.

Alex goes to the breast I have the positioning correct then she sucks for a few minutes and drops off or just doesn't open her mouth enough and I can't get enough breast in her mouth and she chews the nipple or just smacks her lips all around the nipple and slobbers on them.

I really don't know what to do I'm at the end of my tether, I really really want to establish bfeeding so bad as it's the best thing for my daughter but it just doesn't seem to be happening here , plus she's a hungry baby as she's so big!!! Dilemma here and feeling shitty about it.