December 2013 - steaming towards 3/4 cooked

[LadyMedea]

Our shiny new thread... Pile in!

hetsto I don't think there really is a way around it with tinies. Some airlines will let you book a seat and use a compatible carseat. Other possibility is a travelling nanny - I've flown to the US as an extra lap before, and it's the same as booking a seat for a carseat, plus you get the benefit of an extra pair of hands.

mrs I was in a bikini at 40 weeks with DS. Stuff what everyone else thinks!

Stretch marks.....the good news is the longer you avoid them the less bad they'll be. The bad news is they can appear even after you give birth (I know, wtf?!) so you're never truly 'safe'. I reckon you're either prone to them or not and there's precious little you can do.

I plan to get round the snow issue with a sling. Buggies and snow are far more lethal than a good secure sling with yaxtrax on your shoes. And by good, secure sling I don't mean a high street baby bjorn...

Sorry about your OH's grandad abc :( thinking of your family.

Wow rose! It's getting close (and exciting). At least you'll have a fair amount of time to adjust and find some friends before baby arrives. We're still waiting on news of DH's threatened transfer. I've said I'm not moving in December or January so if he goes then he's off without me!

Wow there loads to catch up on lol

Just had my 25 week check. I'm 24cm which is about right she said. Baby kept wiggling away from the dipper when she was trying to hear the heartbeat lol lil bugger...

She's referring me to a consultant due to my hypermobility and back problems and they also like hypermobility people to see a anaesthetist just incase I want a epidural.. Which I will be avoiding if i can.

On the heat front i cant stand it i usually love summer but right now winder can hurry up lol

Hope everyone is ok. Sorry your feeling rubbish crying. Hope your feeling better now. Xxx

Glad to hear that all went well at your appointment Stom . Fingers crossed that a consultant can make your back pain more manageable.

I had my appointment too. Nearly died on my way there and back! Somebody turn off the heating please! Walk that would normally take some 30 min took 45 mins at least as I had to keep in shade, sit down on every bench on the way and I could only move my cankles forward very slowly. Now feeling so dizzy and tired, that I haven't gone back to work for today. Can't do it.
All this suffering for nothing really. Saw a different midwife once again and found out that at 25+3 my bump measures 26 cm.

Bring on the rain tomorrow!

The travelling nanny is a good idea Nom, thank you! I?ll have a look into it. I think it?s something to do with the number of oxygen masks in a row, so you?d need one baby to be in each row, and therefore one adult too.

Glad to hear your appointments were ok Deya and Stom! :)

O2 masks are why if you have twins you find yourself in the aisle seats with random strangers in the middle who get annoyed by the bassinet! The rules about 1 adult per child are down to needing to hold the children on your lap for take off unless the airline has approved certain seats. When DS was tiny I used the Pebble (got that over the cabriofix because it's approved for flying) and we now use a CARES belt.

Thanks guys - I shall bear my bump with pride...whilst remembering to avoid the jacuzzi

So i got my matb1 form today. Yay!
Mw said I need to also out in writing when j want to leave... But no have know clue how to start the letter...

Was just going to say something like. Due to medical conditions I would like to start my maternity leave on 5th October..

Think I may Google it. Or any suggestions I'm not very good at writing lol x

stom don't overthink it.

I would just put something like: I would like to inform you of my mat leave start date which will be 05.10.2013.

you don't need to give them explanation, it is your right to start your ML up to 11 weeks before your due date.

Ok thanks... I wrote on the form they gave me that I wanted to take it in November but because of all the problems with pain etc I'm just going to start it earlier...

It'll be ok to change it.?

Any advice on approaching my impossible working day with management and my colleagues without p*ssing everyone off?

If I seek to swap rooms with colleagues to involve less travelling around - they will have just as a hellish time with the constant moving around and treat me with deep resentment which would actually be more unbearable than the aching legs.

I don't really want to play the legal card, but I have only had a meeting with the boss and no formal risk assessment has been done since April/May and my whole working day has been changed since then.

I don't think I can do this for next seven/eight weeks though - one room was 36 degrees today.

Sorry to be so negative - I promise to cheer up soon.

stom you have to give them 28 days notice, so as long as you hand it in with 28days to go before 5 October, and as long as that date is 11weeks and under till your due date you are fine

mscat it depends what you actually want to do- do you want to do less moving around? Is it better for you & baby that way? If so sod your colleagues, plus they might not actually mind & may understand that since you're carrying an extra person around with you you need to be taking it easier than normal. Or is there a compromise? Don't suffer quietly, definitely speak to your manager and see if there's something that can be done

I'll be handing it in tomorrow. I'll be 24+6.. And I'll be exactly 29 weeks on the 5th October x

MsShrubs I'm a teacher and currently in a different classroom each lesson which isn't too bad if they were all on the same corridor, near the loo but a lot of time they are three flights of stairs to get there and then to get back again. Couple that with lugging the equipment too, it's exhausting.

Think I'm whingy because it's been so hot today too. Thanks for listening.

One good thing has happened though - clean bill of health at the dentist!

msCatShoes definately ask to swap rooms. I feel guilty now that I am the only person in the department who only teaches in 1 room and 1 lab, but my department have been lovely and even take all the equipment and books I need so I don't have to carry anything (except laptop, iPad, keys, cushion to sit on, and last minute (is there any other kind?) photocopying.

I've now asked for longer in between lessons - I have a 30 minute lunch in between 2 labs, it takes at least 10 minutes to clean and set up for the 2nd lab and the physio has told me to walk even slower and NEVER use the stairs (which with 1 lift in the building takes forever). I also got covered for a 75 minutes lesson so I could go to physio, and got back to school 5 minutes into the lesson but just hid in the staffroom rather than teach.

stom Could you be signed off sick rather than use your maternity leave? Your maternity leave would be triggered at 36 weeks, but you would save a lot of leave for after the baby.

yeah id like to do that, but when i spoke to the mw, she said if im off sick then ML automatically starts at 29 weeks?
cant being off sick will be less money than ML.

so it will be financially better if i go on ML, im not worried about going back to work earlier, as i would only get a weekend job due to not being able to afford childcare, so it would only be weekend that i wouldnt get much time with DD.
if that makes sense?
*Mscat8 i would definately ask to move rooms, you're pregnant, not them, im sure they will understand and if they dont then bugger them,, you and baby are more important, i learnt that the hard way after my boss had ago at me for being off sick xx

crying i want that snow suit! sounds so cute!!

ML can only be triggered 4 weeks before you're due, and only if it's pregnancy related sickness.

Maternity Action do a great leaflet which explains the situation.

thanks nom ill have a read x

Welcome zoogeek

Stom if you are in the UK, your midwife is wrong. Pregnancy related illness will only trigger maternity leave at 36 weeks. I was off from 30 weeks with SPD with DD, and my maternity leave started at 36 weeks. The info is here www.gov.uk/maternity-pay-leave/leave

You'll get sick pay for weeks 29-35, then start maternity pay. So you get 6 weeks longer off with some pay.

Hi ladies, I could do with some perspective if anyone has a min. I'm sitting here crying not knowing what is the right thing to do. Our cat is ill. He's been I'll for months- his illness? Vet isn't sure but basically some sort of bowel disorder resulting in pretty vile explosive poos. Poor DH has had to clean most of this every morning (he tends to miss the litter tray) we keep him in at night to reduce fighting with other cats (hence having to use a litter tray). Vet bills so far have been in the hundreds despite insurance (bloody insurance company changed their policy and now we have to pay 20% of bills) the next step is to do an operation to get a biopsy- more bills to pay. This morning DH put the litter tray on a stool in the garage so cat wouldn't use it (we make him go outside during the day) he found it, crapped in it and some of it went all over the place (including wine bottles!) DH went mad, major argument ensued. He wants him put down. I think he's being an insensitive shit. I'm sat here blubbing my eyes out cos I love that cat but know we can't keep paying money out, have a baby on the way and can't be dealing with cat shit as well as baby shit AND I shouldn't be clearing it up and will now spend the next hour doing just that. He says most people would just accept the cat has to be put down but I don't know... Anyone with pets out there help with any sort of perspective/thoughts??

DH says I'm putting the cat before him and the kids!??! Am I?...

Hi mum. Please don't cry. I'm not too good at the reassurance thing. But we had a kitten once and he had something wrong with his bladder and he couldn't empty it so it was getting really full and the toxins were killing him... We took him the to vets abd they said they could do at op which would cost £4000 but the insurance wouldn't cover (not sure why think is because we hadn't had it long enough) anyway... We could either go ahead with the op but that meant that our kitten would have to be on a special diet all the time couldn't eat anything by acccident like grass or anything else he would become I'll.... We couldn't afford the op... And even with the op they said it may not work or could happen again. So we found the kindest thing would be to have him put down as he was so poorly.

It doesnt really help. But I guess you just have to do what is right for your situation.... You have a baby to think about too abd your health.. And the last thing you want to do is get into debt from all the bills.
If the best interest for your cat would be to put him down instead of putting through the pain of the op.

If im honest. I love my cat but if I had to choose between his health and my baby and money. I think in the interests of the cat being unwell and us not having the money I'd either outbid down. Or send him to a charity that will pay for the op and then look after him (we tried to do this but ko charity would pay for the op due to it may not work) but could be worth a try... You won't get to see him agaib but he won't be put down.

Sorry I'm not too good at this but please down cry xx

Mum- sorry you're having a stressful time. I have to admit I've never really had any pets so I just have no perspective on this. However the only advice I can give is not to make any decisions in a hurry, especially whilst you're feeling so upset. If its possible, let things settle a little and talk to your DH again then?

That's prob not hugely helpful .. In the short term, cup of tea, sit down.. Look after yourself.