December 2013 part 2.

[TakingTheStairs]

Just starting a new thread as we're starting to run out of room on the first. www.mumsnet.com/Talk/antenatal_clubs/a1716486-December-2013#38680515

Hi all,

violetbean that was a lovely post. Think we're all hand holding at the moment.
ladymedea hope all stays settled and you have a lovely holiday. we're supposed to be going away at 13 weeks but need to wait and see what consultant says. Fingers crossed for you.
After checking the post for a week I found my appointment letter today buried in a pile of papers on floor. It was sent 2 weeks ago, the next working day after my scan which is a good sign that they're organised! Same can't be said for my house! is all DH fault
Appointment is just before 12 weeks. It says I need to take a wee sample with me, but also try and have full-ish bladder for scan...

Morning
Lady fingers crossed for you.

I have my booking in visit with the midwife tomorrow, and then I don't see her until 25 weeks! I do have 2 scans in between though. I've just read I should take a urine sample, but I don't have a proper pot for it, so I think I'll just have to do it there.

thanks violetbean thats a very calm and rational way to deal with your anxieties- the counselling is obviously useful for such thought processes! Thanks for the food for thought - you're right when you say there's nothing you can do if it did happen anyway. I guess my fear is finding out baby died and I didn't know till a month later or something...

Hence why I'm nervous about telling people (only told close family and 2 friends)

I like the idea of a doppler- I'd buy one right now if I thought DH would think the same way- but I know he'd say it's a waste of money (he's very practcally minded!) as thats what going for appointments is for and also since I don't work I have to be careful with money. I think it's a great idea if you can justify the cost and it eases anxiety. I can see that it would be addictive and also worrying if you couldn't find the hb!

As I don't work I find myself thinking about this stuff a lot....have the kids to keep me busy but there are still times when I obsess over it a bit. Bring on the 12 wk scan!!

on a lighter note, those of you who dye your hair regularly, are you holding out till after 1st trimester?

I wanted to but I've got a month to go and I'm starting to look like a witch with all these grey hairs I use the home dye stuff and I don't know if it's worse than the salon stuff- I've heard semi-permanent can be safer but it probably won't even last a few weeks with my brown hair....

any opinions on this? I know it's a bit like the nail varnish debate- some people avoid it, some think the risk is pretty low and just carry on as usual...

Mumoftwoboys, I had my hair dyed at the hairdressers at about 5/6 weeks, really can't see why this would be a problem. I also had a tattoo done the same day. The only potential problem with that is shock if it's very painful but it's my 5th and I knew exactly what I was letting myself in for, no problems at all! Your body is exposed to all kinds of chemicals and pollutants every day and is capable of protecting you and bean from them. There's so many things we definitely need to avoid I don't see much value in adding even more stuff like nail varnish and hair dye to the list, neither of which enter your blood stream.

Re mc and mmc, I guess it's an anxious time for all of us until we get to the magical 12 weeks mark. And even then there's no guarantees, ever really. So I'm just trying not to dwell on it basically. If anything does happen, it will be out of my control and will almost certainly be because there's an abnormality of some kind.And worrying about it serves no purpose other than stressing me out so I'm just pushing any negative thoughts like that away. But I feel strongly that it is going to be ok, my boobs are permanently sore, my jeans don't fit and my bowels are different so they're my symptoms! Statistically we'll probably be ok and with every passing day the chances get better. I have told loads of people which I may come to regret if anything does happen. There again I'm a very open person and the people I've told, I'd probably tell them if I had a mc anyway. I imagine I would be utterly devastated, would want people's support, would need time off work and it's not something to be ashamed of or hide. And I also imagine that telling people and what they thought would be the least of my worries at that point. I'm tempted to get a doppler but potentially I think that way madness lies. If you can't find the heartbeat, you're going to freak out and I could just see myself doing it ALL the time. I'm going to wait and see when my scan date is next week then decide about getting a private one.

Have pretty much decided to have a home water birth. The more I think about it, it's a no brainer really. My doctor friend isn't keen, neither is DF. But I expected that reaction from both of them tbh. And since it's me that'll be going through it and not them, it's not up to them is it?!!

Ahh, I just slept for 12 hours. Bliss, I actually have some energy! (for the moment..)

Hi all, been lurking throughout this thread, but just wanted to say hello. I had my first scan a week and a bit ago and they put me at 6 + 1, though I was sure I'd be 7. Have any of you with kids already ever had a dating scan that turned out to be out a bit later on? We saw it's wee heartbeat (just a few pixel flickers) so that's a good sign, right? Been worried sick with nerves

Also, found out that someone at my work (I'm a support worker for adults with learning disabilities) has taken it upon themselves to tell service users I'm pregnant, which I'm seriously pissed off about

violet that was a really good post. My 12 week scan is a week on Thursday now. When I got the date it was over 3 weeks away and I felt like the day would never be here but time does actually keep going, I find it so hard to keep rational.

mumof I had my foil highlights done on Friday evening. I had been putting it off due to fear of risk but the roots were getting a bit silly, the previous time had been when I didn't know I was pregnant but I was. I discussed it with my hairdresser and she reassured me. Also, with foils the dye doesn't touch the scalp. I feel so much better after having it done. She told me that pregnant ladies come into the salon for all sorts of dyes all the time.

holly I had been thinking about getting a Doppler and even had a snoop on eBay. Then, when I was sitting outside the midwives office waiting to be called for my booking-in appointment I saw a poster outside saying midwives advise you don't purchase your own Doppler and that if you have concerns you should contact the midwife and when further along monitor the kicks. I haven't bought one but am still debating it as my current concerns are normal I think. I don't have pain and signs of bleeding has stopped but I'm concerned there will be no baby at my scan. But then if I couldn't find the heartbeat with the Doppler it would add to my worries. Maybe I should just hold out now until the scan.

fluffy ooo bliss.

Welcome ccsays

Welcome ccsays and thanks violet and others for such thoughtful and supportive posts. I find them really helpful - I'd really like to relax and enjoy this pregnancy as much as possible and the handholding really helps!

ccsays I can't believe your colleague has been telling service users! Outrageous! Guess there's nothing you can do now it's done... What were they thinking?!

Does anyone know if a massage is ok? I will speak to get when I book it, but I read it can make you feel sick (I've had no morning sickness) I've got a few days off next week, going to ready myself to a pedicure too. Shoulders feel tight &i love a good massage!

Hi fluffy, I think you do need to tell them you are pregnant before you go and I also think some places do special pregnancy massages so perhaps you can opt for that?

Thanks for the posts re mmc. It's good to know others feel the same. Am also worried but trying to stay positive and calm and focus on all the exciting times ahead (although that's easier at some times than others!) we decided to do the harmony tests so am going for a viability scan in a couple of weeks and will be worried until then I think. It also hasn't helped that my NHS appointments are quite late - 11 weeks 5 days for my MW appointment which seemed late to me but apparently is normal in my area (SW London).

I think massages are fine as long as you're comfortable on your front. And I suppose later on you could sit in one of those forward facing chair things. I saw my osteopath about 2 weeks ago and he said it's fine to continue going as long as I can lie comfortably on my front and if not you can work round it and lie on your side etc. He said other than being a bit more cautious with the manipulations, no problem at all. Since osteo (mine anyway) is mostly massage, I imagine that applies too. Tell the therapist you're pregnant though.

A massage sounds wonderful Ducky! A friend recently told me that Clarins do pregnancy treatments, so I might treat myself to one of those after i've got through the next few manic weeks

Mum I've dyed my hair twice now since falling pregnant. The advice is generally that hair dye is ok in pregnancy. I just make sure it's washed off in the shortest possible time!

I've been this morning for my private scan and my Harmony blood test. It was sooooo lovely seeing my little bean 'in the flesh' so to speak. They have put my EDD 2 days earlier as well, at 10 + 6, so every little helps

CCsays.. re dating of scan, yes that happened me on my first pregnancy but I was fully expecting it as I had been charting and was sure I had ovulated very late. That could be what has happened to you, but there's also probably a +- few days margin of error with scans anyway so try not to worry!

Hi all,

Sorry to have gone to radio silence- been in deepest Cornwall with no hope of t'Internet on phone!

Thanks again for the support last week.. Fortunately the spotting settled the same day. Still felt worried though. Spoke to GP who refused referral to epu & whose solution was to come in Monday for her to listen for fetal heart with Doppler. I know some people have joy this early but I just thought I'd end up super anxious if she couldn't find it! So we trotted back to private scan place. Second time in 5 days! They must make all their money from people like us!

Anyway- all still well in there. Mini-Mildred waving and doing somersaults.. Was fab to see. Ah to be a squillionaire and have scans whenever you fancy .

Hope all well with you all.. Lady- sorry to hear about your scare. I hope you've got off on your hols ok and have a lovely relaxing time.

Back to work tomo after a week annual leave .

Mildred so glad everything is ok, what a relief!
Well for the first time in the pregnancy I'm phoning into work sick. I feel dizzy & woozy when I get up, feel spaced out. Not much fun, had to abandon buttering my toast to lie down earlier! I felt so good when I first got up

fluffyducky I had a massage a few weeks ago- spoke to the massage therapist (she's more of a massage therapist/sports massage person rather than one of those in a beauty salon) as I wasn't sure about massages in 1st tri and she said the reason a lot of places say they won't massage pregnant women is to avoid legal action if someone was to miscarry and blame the massage. She said she's done her research and there is no research that says it's dangerous though if you're worried keep it shorter. I had a voucher for an hour and only used 1/2 just for my own peace of mind. And it was LOVELY so go do it! (going to claim the other half soon!)

like the others said- just make sure you tell them you're preggers as some salons use various aromatherapy oils and some aren't suitable during pregnancy.

I had massages throughout my previous pregnancies and just used that special chair- so good when you have backache. She even said she had one client that used to lie on her massive bump as she felt comfortable!! I couldn't do it as soon as I had any form of bump, felt I was squashing the little bean...

Glad all is ok Mildred.

Dasie I'm going to go get some hair dye!! Its bad enough that my face is one big spot fest, I can't cope with awful hair too!! As they say, a happy mum means a happy baby

Thanks girls.. Fluffy this may be stating the complete obvious but are you drinking enough? Sounds a bit like your BP maybe on the low side.. I felt shocking all weekend even vomiting for the first time ( had eaten half a block of Brie!) only really started feeling better when I drank plenty. I know it's awful for me but full fat coke is my friend at the moment. Limited to one, two max a day and have cut coffee but its a lift, a little bit of sugar and fluid all in one. Wouldn't have touched it pre-pregnancy!!

Mildred I think so. today I haven't felt like eating or drinking much. Felt better about 6 but feeling woozy again. I think my iron is low as I can feel my heart fluttering (I've been anemic/had low iron before) but I'm hoping its just a funny day. It's weird it feels like a cloud of woozyiness comes over me.
I have been so bored today, I hope maternity leave (before little one comes along) isn't going to be like this, I'll be climbing the walls.

Fluffy - Have you tried Spartone - its a liquid Iron that is so much better on the body then tablets, you can mix it with orange juice to improve the impact too, it was a life saver both in 1st & 2nd Pg, and especially important after birth as I found my self low on iron both times.

Mildred - I am also on the full fat coke- but not only that I am eating things like fast food that I would never of touched before Pg - yet all my lovely fruit and green veg just makes me sick.

Starting to have the odd day of feeling better so hoping it continues.

I'm on full fat sprite. It's amazing.

I've been soo very ill for the past few days. Harmony Bloods today at 4:30. I think theres a viability scan involved...

oh, and for anyone in the greater london area

I have an amazing massage lady who comes to your home; her hands are amazing. Let me know if you want/need her number. She specialises in antenatal massages. I've been using her since 2007.

Hi all,
Haven't posted much but have been lurking! Hope everyone's doing ok this week?
I'm still not feeling like it's quite real although various symptoms tell me it is! Queasiness has kicked in properly now and I have some strange food preferences. I can't get enough apples (the sourer the better) and raspberries, but have gone off coffee. Also desperate for steak so I am wondering if I am low in iron as I am still crazy tired. Might look into the spatone but am a bit nervous of,the constipation side effects!

It was my birthday yesterday and I decided that a birthday in the first trimester sucks! Dh took me to a posh restaurant and hotel on Friday night - I got a wave of nausea during my main course so just felt rough, and then was so knackered I really just fancied my own bed! I felt so sorry for Dh who'd planned it all before I was pg, but it ended up being wasted on me! Took yesterday off work and spent it with my mum which I do every year but spent most of the day feeling sick!

I still haven't had a mw appointment but popped into my GPs last Friday to chase up and ended up speaking to a midwife there and then! Apparently my booking in appt is likely to be 25th May when I'm around 10wks with the scan approx 2 wks later.

Just found out that the maternity unit of the hospital I'll be using has just had a massive revamp and makeover so I'm quite excited to see it! Love the idea of a home birth in lots of ways but it's out of the question for me as DD was a c-section (she was breech, which we discovered very late on so turning wasn't possible which meant the birth plan went in the bin and it was a very calm and collected elective c-s, which was very different from the unpredictable natural birth that I'd been hoping for). I keep hearing lots of differing opinions over whether to go for elcs again, or a vbac. Pro's and cons for both, so I am hoping I get a nice midwife to help me make the right decision!

Sorry this is so long - I got very rambly there!

hope everyone else is doing Ok and managing to keep sickness and anxiety at bay as much as possible.