March 2013 IX: Cruising to Christmas with burgeoning bumps

[Sheldonella]

Thanks sarahs999 for the lovely new thread name :)

Old thread here

No 9, can you believe it

Phew :)

In fact, I coped so well with it that the midwife on the phone didn't believe I was actually in labour - I had to be quite firm with her and told her I definitely was and that I was coming in. I got to the hospital 8cm dilated!

manda I agree with you about the various reasons people have sections - many of us have various medical/other reasons which may make a section necessary or at least a serous consideration when it comes to birth options.

What I find massively frustrating is that when you medically have a real option whether to try to labour or a just jump to an elective section, the hospital seem very reluctant to go into massive detail about the risks and statistics of this abdominal surgery (until the last minute when they want you to sign the consent form!). Actually this is something people talk very little about compared to how much discussion there is about the risks and difficulties of natural labour. I am the kind of person who needs to understand the statistics for all options to make an informed decision. I don't find 'scary' statistics off putting - quite the opposite, I am empowered by them because I feel I can make the best choice for me. However in my experience doctors/midwives tend to treat you like the lowest common denominator and I absolutely detest the paternalistic approach to advice which is very common, for example being told that sections are incredibly common procedures does not negate the risks that go with this surgery which I want to know as much as possible about.

jojo everyone has very different experience of labours - I certainly wouldn't assume you will feel pain in the traditional sense of the word. I certainly didn't with DD1. I think positivity combined with a power to make well informed decisions can be the difference between a good and bad birth experience irrespective of the kind of labour/birth you have.

Now that's my kind of labour! I want to do as much of it as possible at home where I'll be more relaxed! Though i am a little bit confused about when I know it's time to go go in! I'm not going to any antenatal classes so I either have to pull my head out of the sand and buy a book (any suggestions?) or just hold on until I can't bear it and go in!!

That would be mine as well JoJo, but we shall see when we get to it. No use worrying about it now, there are more pressing issues (such as the fact that I'm thirty weeks and have only bought three babygrows. ).

Tramp come and talk to me, I hated some of my baby groups for that very reason. I'm still a little bit opposed to the whole idea of being a walking, talking womb even with dc2.

Tribble - i am here and talking. I can also be found in real world too, if you are in London that is.

jojo - I am also going with ostrich approach. I know Labour is different for everyone, but I have read and seen enough to know it is bloody unpleasant and no-one will be able to convince me otherwise. I have heard tell that if I have an easy time I will laugh at myself and wonder what I worried about. That sounds marvellous, bring it on. However female family history suggests that not one woman in our family had an easy time of it in labour, that the term labour would be better replaced with excrutiating, and that if I manage it all without complications I will be doing marvellously well. So I am aiming for that. And lots of pain relief. And where possible a nice dark space where I can hide from everyone whilst I suffer it all. Still, I get to meet Socs at the end and it isn't like I can avoid it, so that is a life experience I will experience at the time and not bother my head with in the meantime.

Crikey, it is 7pm, MrM is late and I have to prettify before heading out (think curlers, fluffy slippers and dressing gown, but the office based equivalent - snow boots, scruffy trousers, cat hair everywhere and unbrushed hair). Best dash. Anon ladies.

JoJo, and others, have a read of www.mumsnet.com/Talk/pregnancy/1638254-Breathing-the-baby-out-Vs-pushing. Some really awesome experiences there! Not at all!

Arm has stopped hurting now ? but I'm keeping an open mind as others have suffered quite a bit with this one it seems! When did you have yours JoJo? Oh and well done with birth plan! Have a bath for your aches if you can!

Have a nice night Tramp!

DH has just got home and told me a catalogue of brilliant things he's done this afternoon, like deciding on which Oxford college xmas concert to take his mum to at the weekend and even buying tickets, and also setting up appt for us to go see some double-glazing clients of the local two-lad firm. I normally do all this kind of stuff, and if I ask him to he normally takes an age and I end up nagging or doing it myself, so I am pleasantly surprised and really chuffed with him. He is also cooking dinner while I try to finish the 3000 word article which will earn enough to buy us a wood-burning stove. It's about a month beyond the extended-extended-extended deadline though so I'll be surprised if I actually get paid!

Babies going mad all of a sudden. Belly feels like a washing machine!

Tramp We're currently SE of you (well dependant upon where you are), have a nice night!

Mand Ooo well done Dh!

Jojo I went in when I was no longer comfortable enough to stay at home.

Hey all,

Quick wave really as so tired, been in bed since 7. Found out today that they won't be covering me on matty leave as no applications for my job and manager wants me to take matty leave early as was off sick on friday... Have to say sounds tempting!
Love to all x

lanny they can't force you off unless you have a sick day related to pregnancy unless you are 35 weeks plus. If its unrelated to pregnancy, then they can't stand your mat leave until 40 weeks. Unless, you want to go off that is . I hope you feel better soon.

lanny mat leave can only be forced if you are 36 weeks and off with a pregnancy related condition. Hence me being off sick until Feb.

trib been meaning to ask when you went south? I just kept assuming you were there visiting then I realised you'd been talking it for ages

Well hubby has hidden the car keys incase I get any ideas for morning so that's me told!!! Getting worried no news on FB yet though- I feel bad for starting some sort of mis behaving baby chain

I had a natural delivery for DS1 and needed ALOT of stitches and lost a lot of blood so wasn't allowed to special care for 2 days which was hard ESP as he weighed 2lb people assume I must of coughed and there he was!! In fact they didn't believe I was in labour so didn't remove stitch and my cervix and stitch ripped out with him!

Between DS1 andDS2 I had both my femurs cut in half and rebuilt and when pregnant with DS2 the second metal plate was still in and was slightly bend after throwing myself out of bed within half hour of waking up from operation so they were worried about movement and knew I could not open legs far etc and wasn't sure how it would effect things and decided too high a risks so with mobility problems anyway so c section!
This time the metal is all gone but the stitch needs to be out before birth and epidural won't work plus have same mobility problems so final choice is mine- plus have group b strep and with a small baby labour coud be fast! C section is prob safest choice and what I will have but can't help bein a bit broken hearted if I am honest that it will mean another baby born and I am not awake to remember the moment

Tribble - we've no excuse not to meet up then. FB me if you fancy it.

NCT bump meet consisted of just one other couple. So not quite the numbers I had expected. i think alot of people bailed. Which is a bit rude really. The two ladies who organised it were v nice though, so chatted to them and they shared a few stories. So not a dead loss. Have been informed about being tongue tied, and how this can cause breast feeding issues and the positives of using the services of a lactation consultant. Seriously ladies, this is a whole new world. First breast pumps, now lactation consultants.

Zoey - glad to hear that your hubby is making sure you stay put and rest up. Your poor body has been through it and then some hasn't it. Not being awake isn't great, but you know what, baby won't mind and you will get to say hi and bond after.

Yes v important to get tongue tie snipped. Dd3 has tongue tie which doesn't affect her massively apart from feeds took hours. We only found out when she was older and would have needed a GA for it. It doesn't affect her speech though as she has enough movenent.

Hi all, have we had any more news?

Am WFH home today as have part three of my dental extravaganza this morning, so hopefully will get chance to read and catch up.

Eek on the dental extravaganza.

Good luck ethel

zoey your dh knows you too well!! Glad you're having another day of rest. Your story re ds1 has just made my eyes water!! Ouch!

No news on Facebook. Hope everything is ok.

manda I know I'm just repeating what others have said up thread but in our nct group there was a set of twins. The mum had a planned c section at 37 weeks and to this day swears she had the easiest time of birth compared to the rest of the 8 of us! She speaks really highly of her experience. I know you've got lots of people to chat to but if you ever want to chat to her I'm sure shed be more than happy to email you- let me know and I can pm you her email address.

Must take ds to nursery. (Sigh) my mobility is that of a snail today! Could be a long one!

manda I had a schedule section on DS. I had a fibroid blocking the cervix so 2 weeks before due date the consultant who I paid a lot to for his advice and implicitly trusted said that I needed one the following week. TBH I was happy he made the call rather then let me labour and then need an emergency which would have been a lot worse. I found it a very positive experience. Had skin to skin contact with DS in the recovery room. Was well able to mind him the following morning and was showered and up walking around by the next morning. Once the decision was made I never thought anymore about not having a natural birth. In fact a friend is due her 3rd baby and had an emergency section on her first, a natural on her second and would love a section on this baby as she found it easier but her consultant is not having any of it!

Horrible wet day in Dublin. poor DS has a wee cold. And we have a big trip to town and the panto and afternoon tea planned. He has lots of calpol in him and hopefully will have a big long nap and be like a new man when he wakes up.

Hope everyone is doing well. Had an il event yesterday and my sils were lovely saying how well I looked. Mil however was saying oh you have a fine bump. Grrrrrr... I am fecking 28 weeks pregnant and actually still fitting non maternity clothes but hey thanks. She is annoying me lots these days and I don't know why as she is generally nice.

Happy Wednesday all.

Oc x

confuddleds thread

Thanks for updating with confuddled news ood. And thanks to all for sharing their stories of labour and sections. Very good to hear such a range of experience from everyone for us first timers!
Tramp I know what you mean about the womb thing! I do end up talking about little one a lot, but also want to talk about work, life, builders...I get frustrated at the assumption that the baby is all I can talk about!
Zoey doing the stern face at you, glad you are resting!!

Tramp I'll message you if you so wish. Shame that there was only one other couple, I found it really helpful to be able to pop round to peoples houses in the early days. It is especially true when you have a newborn that misery loves company, just having someone else who was taking out shares in Touche Eclat made everything seem a bit easier.

BTW, if anyone needs it I make a mean cuppa and my toddler is trained to be able to rock a car seat (in exchange for biscuits).

Tribble, I'm up for meeting up - also se london. Mentioned it earlier in the thread, thought after new year would prob be best...

ood, how exciting, Robert winston answered your question!

I know, I never get answers on wrbchats :(

Manda I have lots of friends who have had planned c-sections, including my twin friend last year and they have all said that they were very calm, positive experiences. I think if I was having twins, even after 3 natural births, I would probably favour a c-section. The risk of having one naturally & one by c-sction would put me off a lot!!

JoJo All of my labours have been really positive, even ds1's where I had an epidural (the relief was amazing! ). With ds2 & 3 I wasn't even examined once during labour. The midwives just said to trust my body and it did what it needed to do. They were both born without even a graze or tear and so no need for stitches and I was able to go home very quickly. Fingers crossed this one is the same!

October I hope your ds is feeling better & that he enjoyed his afternoon. ds1 is sick today and was awake every hour last night feeling rotten. We have had a quiet (well as quiet as a day at home with 3 small boys can be) day at home. I am knackered from no sleep too so early nights for us all this evening. So many horrid bugs going around at this time of year.

Zoey hope you are still resting

Has anyone else got the vile metallic taste again? Mine went but has come back and it's disgusting . It makes me want to eat more to try and mask the taste but that only happens for about a minute. I hope it goes again very soon.

Hope Confuddled is Ok.