March 2013 IX: Cruising to Christmas with burgeoning bumps

[Sheldonella]

Thanks sarahs999 for the lovely new thread name :)

Old thread here

No 9, can you believe it

Hi All,

Finally getting a chance to catch up a bit!

Zoey hope you are being a good girl and getting lots of rest!

Sheldon i'm afraid i'm not much of an expert on reusable nappies. I know that there are so many out there and you can usually try different types before you buy. Also, a few friends who have used them have found different styles/brands work at different points in a baby's life (for example, I know there's one type that is supposed to be much better for newborns) So it may be that you need a few anyway. Sorry not to be more helpful!

Lexi really sorry to hear about the ongoing builder woes. Must be so disappointing to have everything ready and mentally prepared and then to be let down. If it helps at all, we aren't going to have a nursery for dd. She will have a little crib in the corner of our bedroom for the first few months and then she will have to share a room with her brother (it's currently a digger themed room too !) All her clothes will just have to be squeezed into the limited storage that we have in his room. I'm a bit sad because I would love to have created a pretty, girlie nursery but I know she won't care so am staying reasonable and spending the money on other things!

Emsy it sounds like you are staying strong despite some very difficult circumstances. Hope things can settle down a bit and you get some good support from your dh.

Pink Loving the idea of unwrapping the children's christmas presents and putting batteries in first. Genius! I've done all my wrapping this year but am definitely going to try and do that in future.

Ethel weeing on the floor! Little monkey! I do find the whole toddler 'pushing the boundaries' thing very challenging sometimes, never entirely certain how to react. Nothing worse than them giggling when being told off!

Manda and Tramp and anyone else feeling groggy (everyone then!) I know how frustrating it is! There's so much to do at this time of year as well. Please be kind to yourselves. You're going to need all the energy you've got in a few weeks!

Just texted a friend this morning asking her what her 6 month old dd wants for christmas. She said 'cot toys' - am i being thick? What is a cot toy?? Can anyone explain?!!

Not much to report here. Rubbish night's sleep last night. Too much back and leg pain! Last day at work before Christmas and not back until the 7th!! Yay! Then only 7.5 working days 'till mat leave! Sorry for name checking you all. Hope everyone is ok.

Em ds3 has this cot toy which he loves. We also have a Tiny Love activity centre that fits on the cot so I would say something like that?

Lexi, walking through fog is a good description! That's a bugger about your boss sending you more and more work - hope it's not stressing you out too much. Is there someone you could spread the load with a little? Really feel for you and your builder woes. I think if you have lost faith in your builder at this stage (and he sounds like a pain) then you should ditch him. It's such a big job and a lot of money is at stake. I know it would be just perfect if the work was completed before Beanette's arrival, but 'it is what it is' (as my DH is prone to saying annoyingly often) and it will still be perfect but just in a different way! At least this gives you the chance to put out feelers for a better and more reliable and communicative builder in the meantime? I often use FB for things like that, say if we need new plumber or other trades recommendations.

Sheldon yippee re lactulose!

Em wow for last day at work before xmas!

Hospital have this morning confirmed that records no longer exist for my 1996 surgery so it looks certain that twins will be born by CS. I think I'm okay with this, especially as with twins I couldn't have a go at the whole waterbath-activeyoga-breathingbabiesout thing and then demanding an epidural anyway.

I have the whooping cough jab later today - o joy!

Type cot toys into amazon and LOADS come up. They dangle off the side of the cot and are choke and head banger proof I believe.

Reusable Nappies - right I did research these, quite thoroughly, in the first trimester. This is what I learnt.

1. You can use Terry squares, BUT the cotton and bamboo resuable nappies are more user friendly and bottom friendly. They are also pricier.

2. Reusable's today come in 3 parts*. There is the external 'pant' which looks like a nappy/panty. Inside this you insert your cotton or bamboo reusable nappy - not unlike a sanitary towel actually. Then on top of this you include a tissue layer. The tissue layer takes the worst of the poo/wee and can be chucked down the loo. The bamboo/cotton towel goes into the laundry bin (more on this in a mo) and the external pant can either be wiped down and reused or also popped in the laundry bin.

• there are all in one versions of reusables, but these are the most expensive option.

3. You buy a laundry bin for the reusables which is effectively a sealed bin, so it keeps the whiffs away from your nose.

COSTS

Bamboo - about £6 per nappy

Cotton - about £3 per nappy

Terry toweling - about £25 for 12 (cheapest but also bulkiest and hardest to use)

Covers (the pant) - £10 - £12 EACH

Bin - £35

Inner biodegradable tissue - £3.99 for 100

All in one's are £15 each.

Bamboo vs Cotton

Bamboo has a natural antiseptic and apparently that means no nappy rash. Also incredibly soft for babies bum. BUT take longer to dry.

Cotton is easier to dry, so can be more user friendly for those with tumble driers for instance.

Numbers

Babies use about 6-8 nappies per day.

Which means you can expect to pay £250 for reusable nappies for your baby.

Top advice
Don't buy in advance. Get newborn disposables for first couple of weeks and buy one of whatever two or three reusable nappy options you think you would like and try them out on baby. That way you know what best fits your babies bum and works best for you. Then buy the full kit. Should save you money and time. Also, you can buy them second hand on e-Bay so if you do this you can pick what you want online without worrying that you are buying the wrong thing.

Difference between the brands - negligible apparently.

(I'll pop this up on FB as well).

Lexi - I agree with Manda, if you don't trust him any more ditch him. Easier to do that and have building work a bit later than it is to have him start and then disappear. And baby will be with you for a little while before switching to nursery anyway, so it won't be too bad... fingers crossed it all gets sorted out soon for you.

manda think twins probably makes the agreeing to a section easier, you might have been more frustrated with a singleton. I had a good section with dd3.

Thanks, Ood, you're absolutely right Last thing I want is one vaginal birth for no.1 and then being rushed off for a CS for no.2, which I'm told can happen!

Yeah with dd2 I had a v long but not progressing labour followed by a section. Wouldn't recommend it!

Also, it's important to remember that it doesn't actually matter how/where they come out. All of that will just be irrelevant when you start your new life with the lovely little new person/people.

Sheldon I've got lots of different types, with ds1 I discovered pockets and found them to be the nappy for us. I've since branched out into other systems, but for the most part we either stick with a hybrid system or pockets. Lots of different brands as different ones did us at different times (plus I'm fickle).

Can I ask what the issue is with attempting labour even though C/S is a likely outcome? Is it just tiredness etc that's the issue? I always assumed that encouraging your body to undergo a natural process is a good thing even if you are unable to complete it. Not had to think about this issue before so just curious really.

rainbow IME it's the worst of both worlds! Plus an elective section is v different to an emergency one.

ood yes I appreciate elective section very different. I loved every second of my labour with DD1 so maybe that gives me a different perspective!

I had 42 hours of wandering round a hospital room to get to 3cm. Had all sorts attached to me monitoring dd2 and loads of meds. Then had an emergency section under GA in the middle of the night and my scar took ages to heal. So I had the pain of labour then missed the birth and had looong recovery. That's not including all the weird allergic reactions I kept having.

Rainbow, in 1996 I had a termination which went wrong and I didn't leave hospital for a week. After 12 hours it was discovered I was haemoragghing badly and I was rushed to theatre. I was never told that there had been a uterine perforation, but this is what all docs, gynaecologists and consultants have since told me probably happened. Unfortunately, as I've just discovered, that hospital have destroyed my medical notes it being so long ago. The facts are that if there was a uterine perforation and I try to labour vaginally there is a 3% chance that my uterus will split during the birthing process, requiring major surgery with probably removal of uterus. This risk is increased with twins as uterus is so much bigger. Consultants strongly advise CS as - although the risk is relatively low, in single figures - the worst case scenario isn't pretty.

I was reading all the posts on the 'is it possible to breathe your baby out?' thread this morning and I'm so happy for those who are able to have a joyous vaginal birth. It sounds great.

However DH and I are very comfortable following doctors' orders on this!

If this counts as an 'elective section', which I understand some look down on, then so be it!

Thanks Sarah - you're absolutely right - health of babies (and mummies) is of primary importance in the end

Thanks tribble. I think I will get a few different types to go with my squares. This is all new and exciting :)
manda I would want a section in your situation too. There is no way to fail at giving birth.
ood 42 hours, that sounds traumatic :(

manda totally appreciate there are compelling medical reasons in many situations to go for section upfront as in your case. My question was a more general one as I know people who have been given the option of trying to labour first even though the likelihood is that they end up with a section anyway. Lots of people seem not to bother trying labouring in that situation and I just wondered why if doctors are on board etc. Just curiosity in case I ever find myself in that position!

I'm having an elective section, two weeks early, for similar medical reasons. I need to know when the baby is coming so I can stop my large doses of blood thinners two days before, otherwise haemorraghing/bleeding profusely in an emergency C section/tearing is a real possibility. The early section is also to minimise my chances of having pre-eclampsia again, which of course get higher the closer to 40 weeks you get.

Plus, having had five miscarriages in a row I kind of want to cut out all the variables at the end and have it all planned neatly.

sarah I am on blood thinners as well so I suspect possibility of a planned section will come up at some point for the same reasons. Totally understand on the planning side too after so much uncertainty. Those of you who have had/are going to have elective section, how much information were you given about the risks of the surgery and the related statistics when you had the initial discussions with consultants about an elective? Would be useful to know what kind of information I can expect to be given upfront or whether I need to do my own research as usual!

Eeep for all of you there, sounds horribly rough. I would always err on side of caution where gynacology is concerned. Experience has shown me that Drs can be a wee bit too laissez faire with your ladies bits, although not it seems the good ones nor your birth consultants.

Rainbow - I think the idea of trying to give birth naturally if you know you're only going to need a C-Section is well exhausting, depressing and in terms of spurring you on at the time of trying to push probably not great.

I am off to an NCT bump meeting tonight. MrM is coming, on pain of death. We were giggling at weekend because my baby book was explaining how I would be dropping my 'normal' friends and gravitating towards women who were going through the same things as me and how excited I would be to meet other women who are pregnant and due to have their babies at the same time as me. We were giggling because I couldn't be less enthused & I am actually avoiding a few pregnant friends because apparently they have lost the ability to talk about anything but babies - a little chatter is grand, but come on, there is more to all of us than our wombs! I suspect I will be in a room full of women looking forward to nice long maternity leaves, probably full into natural births and quite possibly more organised than I am. My idea of hell! But you never know, I may meet another woman like me and then all will be worthwhile.

Anyway, who needs NCT when you have the March Mumsnet thread?!

Tramp hope NCT class is fun and doesn't bring you out in a bump-allergy, hehe! There's more to us than our wombs - aye to that!

Five, Sarah ? So, so pleased to have you with us for the whole of this journey. We're all nearly there now.

I suspect there may be quite a few complicated histories behind so-called 'elective' CS. Many in my shoes may have chosen not to share their story because of the general taboo about terminations (especially, I find, on MN). I firmly believe in a woman's right to choose and in order to defend that I think it's really important to talk about these big life experiences so am open about it; but this strand of conversation makes me think there may be a lot of other similarly complicated reasons women might keep the necessity for their so-called 'elective' CS quiet? Just a hunch.

I only found out today that the hospital had definitely no surgical notes, so I expect to have CS section chat at my next consultant appt in mid-Jan.

Just waddled down the hill for WC jab. Nurse said it was a combo of things including tetanus, and it's the tetanus that makes the arm hurt. Arm already a bit sore!

Now, what of those two Marchers on bed-rest? Any news? Will scurry off to FB to see.

I'm going to have an elective this time, but I haven't really gone into details here for fear of putting first-timers off of labour/terrifying them. My labour was definitely not the norm though. x

Please don't put me off possum! I'm trying to bury my head in the sand :) my Girly logic tells me that if I think the worst regarding pain, I'll be pleasantly surprised!
I wasn't too bothered about labour until about a week ago and now I only have 9 weeks to go its suddenly at the front of my mind all the time :( I think it's probably the unknown aspect really! I've written my birth plan though :)

How is your arm feeling now manda? Mine has been dead all day!
Not that the rest of me is any less achy, my abs ache, my back aches, my hips ache. I've only had a gentle 2 hour stroll around town!

Honestly, the labour itself was fine. I did that, went in expecting the worst and it was nowhere near as bad as I expected.