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little kicks and a bit less sick - half way to June 2012

914 replies

Kveta · 22/01/2012 16:08

new thread! 4th one already, wow, we can talk for Britain!! :o

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OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Dalrymps · 14/02/2012 10:32

Oh and welcome and congrats DontbugmeGrin

Warlin · 14/02/2012 10:40

Morning all

kveta I'll come and eat cake with you....yum yum!

Florin Monkey congrats on the scan and elly congrats on your little girl! How exciting.

So funny as girl I work with has just announced she's pregnant and due in Sept..:) Think our boss nearly fell off her seat as it's a small company and we are both ops managers and will be off together! Brought back memories of how terrified I was telling them. Great though as we will be able to talk all things baby in the office now!

ecstatica I have ordered the Bugaboo camelion. I have met loads of people with them out walking and they all seem to love them. I'm at the beach a lot with the dog so really need one that was good in the sand/ off road and it seems to be. Plus it's really light to steer and I love the look of it. Check if your Mother Care are doing the 10% off day on the 24th Feb...I know ours were so I used the potential discount to negotiate with our local baby store!

Amnethyst I'm going to the anti natal classes at the end of May. It seems late to me but if you do want to meet people it may be better to wait to start of June? March does seem a bit early but I'm sure you won't forget it all!!

mini enjoy your scan today. Jealous as I'd love to see LO again.

He is def getting more active now. I can't wait to the end of Feb either...I'm due 4 months today which seems like an eternity away.....:(

emblosion · 14/02/2012 10:46

Happy birthday kveta hope you have a fab day full of treats and cake!

Morning all, have been mostly lurking this week due to being mega busy with uni and placement but have been reading along to keep up!

I have booked nct classes BUT did get a really good discount due to being a student, if anyone is on a low income its worth looking into - there's no way we could have afforded it at full price. I'm also on a bit of a mission to get to know people locally so that was another reason I wanted to sign up.... I'm also doing the NHS ones and an active birth session so covering all the options lol!

dontbugme I am knackered too - sleeping ok at night but still needing naps all over the place, am hoping the mythical 'blooming' will soon begin!

miniangel am v jealous of your massage, what a lovely treat! DP and I are having a romantic trip to IKEA and to pick a new carpet Hmm which isn't quite the same ....

Have a great valentines day all x x

10000fireflies · 14/02/2012 11:04

Happy Birthday Kveta. Have a lovely day and enjoy that cake.

Congrats Florin, Monkey and Elly on your scans, and good luck with yours today Mini. Oh, and enjoy your massage and dinner later mini.

I will second whoever said the NCT courses are a tad pricey. Round here they are £300 a go! Could do with going just to meet a few local people with kids. Been looking at the local ante-natal classes too. Plenty of the OBEMs clearly haven't been. MWs talk them through beautifully. I think keeping calm is the key, though, isn't it?? Do say yes, you 2nd, 3rd and 4th timers!! That and having done some reading/research in advance.

Been told to dress up for tonight as DH has a surprise planned. Wonder if I can rustle up something comfy and glamorous??!!

Have a lovely day everyone. xx

emblosion · 14/02/2012 11:06

Ps Florin,Elly&Monkey congrats on your scans!

& Warlin great to have a pregnancy buddy at work!

Dalrymps · 14/02/2012 11:22

Not sure if I'm going to bother wit antenatal classes this time. NCT don't do classes here so it's just the NHS ones and I've been to them the last two times. Only reason I'd go would be to meet some mums due at the same time. Just not sure I can be bothered though, that sounds awfully lazy but my evenings are for working or OU reading so hard to fit extra stuff in.

fireflies yes, absolutely the best thing you can do is stay calm and focused. I found it helped to count through each contraction and think that each one was one closer to the endSmile

10000fireflies · 14/02/2012 11:31

So the motto is 'Keep Calm and Carry on Pushing', then Dalry??!!

Dalrymps · 14/02/2012 11:45

Erm, something like that fireflies yesGrin although in my case the calmness was littered with the occasional swear word

Kveta · 14/02/2012 11:51

my motto is more 'scream until you get the drugs' :o I am not a very calm person though...

OP posts:
Dalrymps · 14/02/2012 11:56

Lol Kveta also a good tacticGrin

My problem is my labours are so quick I never get chance of the hard drugs. Think I'll have to ore order them this time!

StarlightDicKenzie · 14/02/2012 11:59

TBH, I think it is really important for mothers, especially first time mothers, to do lots of reading and research and not rely on antenatal classes, or the midwives on the day to coach you.

The reason for this is that no two women are the same and a midwife might 'coach you' to do something that actually makes things more difficult. not deliberately, but because she just hasn't had the time to get to know you, or follow your pattern of labour.

10000fireflies · 14/02/2012 12:05

Considering adopting your motto instead Kveta Grin

StarlightDicKenzie · 14/02/2012 12:05

I would recommend that you consider strategies for keeping calm and coping with a regular minute or more of overwhelmingness, and practise.

And I would research the following:

Efficient positions to birth the baby.
Baby heart rate monitoring - continual and intermittent.
The pros and cons of vaginal examinations.
The types of assissted birth options. High cavity, low cavity forceps, ventous, fundal pressure and your feelings/preferences.
Rest and be thankful stage.
The pros and cons of being coached through the pushing stage.
The true likeliness of having a waterbirth if that is what you want (most people don't get them even if they want them).
The hormones involved in labour.
The physiology of labour.
The pros and cons of each of the drugs available where you will be giving birth.
The optimal birthing environment and how to increase your chances of getting it.

AmethystMoon · 14/02/2012 12:34

Happy birthday Kveta Thanks i hope you have a lovely day x
...and to all of you worry about turning 30 - stop and make the most of today 'cos you'll never be that young again! I'm nearer 40 and have realised age means nothing at all, just count your blessings and focus on the good things in life and don't waste valuable energy worrying about the crap stuff, especially the things you can't control.

Congrats on your scans MonkeyJR, Florin and Ellybett - congrats on your little girl :)

That's useful to know that you moved to a lightweight stroller Dalyrmps - they look so much less bulky.

Miniangel - how lovely of your DH, a pregnancy massage sounds wonderful, especially followed by a posh meal - enjoy! Hope your scan goes well today too.

Right back to work for me now I guess, just worked out only 15 and a half weeks left at work 'til maternity leave yipee Grin

CathFin · 14/02/2012 12:36

Starlight - I would add that its useful to know which drugs will cross the placenta and affect the baby too. e.g. An Epidural won't but Pethidine will. The NHS classes I did didn't offer that kind of information, just what the pain relief options were.

Its also good to know what your local hospitals have - are there birthing pools, how many etc. I nearly had a water birth first time but when my waters went there was meconium in them so I was straight out and up on the bed for monitoring.

Flipping heck £300 is expensive by the way! I did do a refresher course last time but it was under £100. Depends on where you live I think, not sure how much is was first time around but think it was less than £200.

I was very disappointed with the midwife support during my second labour, total contrast to my first where it was fab. There really is no rhyme or reason to what kind of experience you end up with in my opinion but you can make it clear what you want with your birth plan, even if that isn't how it pans out at least the midwives should read it and try to keep as close to the plan as possible if they can.

Ooh - I can go on a bit. Got a bit of a bee in my bonnet because I definitely want this last labour to be better than my second!

StarlightDicKenzie · 14/02/2012 12:43

Epidruals routinely have opiates in them. The opiate part crosses the placenta.

You can request an epidural without opiates but you might need to warn the hospital in advance, or give them more time on the day.

Not saying in my post that you shouldn't trust the midwives, but you are the only one for whom YOU are the priority. They have other patients, families, hospital protocol based on budgets and a variety of attitudes, experience and even the best mw can have a bad day.

You improve your birth outcome/experience hugely by making it clear that you have researched options and have a small clue about what you want.

AmethystMoon · 14/02/2012 12:51

Thanks for your list Starlight, any suggestions of places to start researching?

I think my plan is along the lines of Dalyrmps advice (love the idea that each contraction is one nearer the end - I'd never thought about it like that and I'm one for counting, so that's a great plan too), however Kveta's sounds a great back up plan too Grin. I'm generally a calm person - calm in a crisis sort of thing but am easily frustrated by little things - so not sure how I will react. therefore I want to try and prepare myself with techniques for calm.

Kveta · 14/02/2012 12:59

One other thing to add - don't get fixated on a birth plan. I know so so many people who were planning a water birth or a home birth and it didn't happen for whatever reason, and they were all beating themselves up about it.

Go into it with an informed, open, mind, and you should be ok.

I had a pretty grim 1st birth, and seemed to recover quicker than a friend who wanted a home water birth, but couldn't (not enough midwives available at the time), and had a very straightforward hospital birth, didn't need pain relief etc. She was so sad about it though, and said she felt she'd failed massively. I ended up in the delivery unit for mine, as had a bleed, and had a 3 day labour, pethidine, gas and air, 1 epidural (which failed) and a 2nd epidural, then a forceps delivery. It was unpleasant, but I got my baby out of it, and from speaking to midwives/consultant it seems I had no other options at the time, so it was, IMO, a success.

I'll have to dig out my birth plan actually, and see if it bears any resemblance to the actual birth :o

And my god, the epidural that worked was amazing... :o

OP posts:
ceeej · 14/02/2012 13:08

Just managed to catch up after a busy weekend, the shopping talk is very exciting, we're off to Kiddicare next weekend so I need to look through all the comments I've clipped into Evernote and do some proper research before we go.

congratulations to everyone who's had scans recently

HAPPY BIRTHDAY kveta Thanks hope you get plenty of cake

Mini what an excellent V day pressie, full marks to your DH and enjoy the scan

Hi dontbugme and welcome on board, I find peeing all the time at night annoying too and I seem less able to navigate around the furniture in the dark so there's quite a lot of crashing into things and swearing going on!

Starlight thanks for the fab list of things to investigate. With general medical concerns at the GP I have always taken the approach of making it clear that I understand the physiology/biochemistry of what they're talking about and ultimately consider it my choice whether to accept their advice so I'd like to be able to do the same with labour. Of course I have no idea if I'll be capable of rational discussion once in labour so will have to make sure DH has done all the reading too!

StarlightDicKenzie · 14/02/2012 13:29

Shiela Kitsinger, Michael Odent, Maggie Howell, Grantly Dick-Read, Ina May Gaskin are all good for the physiology of birth as well as strategies on how to keep calm. They are all pro-natural birth but if you're planning on using loads of drugs I would still recommend a read because the information can be very helpful regardless.

The drugs will bring up loads of information on google, but also MN is a very good resource. I think the NCT and many baby/pregnancy sites also give some basic information.

Some of the other things have been well discussed on MN too so you could look through the archives.

Homebirth.co.uk is a really good site on what a typical undisturbed birth should be like but also includes information on drugs and the pros and cons of hospital policies plus strategies for dealing with them if you need to.

I think also that if you can, try to think outside of the 'options'. Sometimes the NHS present things as one of the other when actually there is a third way. For example 'vit k orally or by injection?' - well what about none?

Or cord cut straightwaway or after pulsating? - well what about after placenta delivered?

For a c/section, even emergency, you might want to put in your plan that any lines into you are all fixed somewhere that enables you to have one arm completely free in order to be able to touch and hold your newborn immediately.

Assisted deliveries are used for a variety of reasons. Sometimes it is just the judgement of a midwive that you are too tired to keep going, and they may be right, but you may wish to have it in your plan that should the second stage be prolonged you'd like to exhaust a variety of optimal delivering positions before forceps are considered etc.

There is LOT to learn - lol. Thankfully we all have time! Grin

10000fireflies · 14/02/2012 15:31

Starlight thank you, and everyone else, for all that useful stuff about birth plans. I will do some reading based on that. V interesting about Epidurals. My initial reading had suggested the same as Cathfin though- that they didn?t cross the placenta. I do feel that the whole birth experience is as much in my hands as the MWs. Been getting a bit cross with DH for not reading the book I gave him. He doesn?t like being told what to do which is going to make him an interesting birth partner!!

Not sure why DH has told me to get dressed up tonight. He hasn?t booked anything and was just thinking we could go to the local cinema and then to Gourmet Burger, but the film he was thinking of isn?t showing there? So nothing booked? Ah, the age of romance is truly alive!! At least I don't have to wash my hair/worry about what to wear!! Hope you all have a lovely evening ladies, especially those of you who?re currently single, partners are away, or you?re feeling a bit under the weather. Why not join me on the sofa for a snuggle under blankies, crisps and chocolate and Holby City? Valentines day is so over-rated!! FF xx

bemybebe · 14/02/2012 15:41

Just popping in before walking the dog to say that fwiw Kiddicare do 10% off on purchases over £150 today only as a prezzie for Valentine's. So if you are/were thinking to buy something from them, it is a good incentive to do so.

Shelduck · 14/02/2012 17:29

Hi all - lots to catch up on I see!

Welcome dontbugme!

Congrats on the scan news florin, monkey and elly!

Hope you're having a brilliant birthday, Kveta. I really l liked turning 30 because it made me feel more of a legitimate grown-up, but maybe as you're already a mum you've got no worries with that one! Wink

ecstatica - hope you're doing OK. You sounded really down a couple of days ago. Sad

Seriously - I think we're going to go for NCT, but I think the course is a bit cheaper where I am, and my brother pretty much frogmarched me to my PC to get me to sign up because he insisted he found it so useful for meeting people. (Just read that back to myself, and should point out that he and his partner were expecting - he's not just a creepy man who likes hanging around with pregnant women!)

Amethyst - I loved your story about sticking your bump out for the delivery man! Grin I've found myself on he verge of doing the same, but I think people just think I've let myself go!

fireflies - have a good evening! I suspect DH and I will be toasting each other with champagne flutes of Lemsip, and sensually massaging each other with Vicks vaporub. Mmm sexy.

Have a good evening everyone.

10000fireflies · 14/02/2012 17:33

Yeah baby!! Seriously though, please don't make me laugh so much, Shelduck - puts pelvic floor under too much strain!! Grin

thedogwalker · 14/02/2012 20:06

Welcome Dontbugme, glad you could join us, pull up a chair and natter Smile. Kayzr, Warlin hope you're feeling better today. Kveta Happy 30th Birthday, hope you've had a wonderful day. Congratulations Elly on your girl Smile.
I've had a really busy couple of days so not managed to log on and tonight its taken me ages to read the 4 pages of posts, my can we natter Grin.
Even though DH is still away, came home from work tonight to flowers, card and chocolates waiting for me, he is an 'ole' romantic at heart. For those of you worrying about turning 30, I turn 40 at the end of the year and I still feel in my prime, so there is nothing wrong or old about 30.
Regarding prams, I bought the icandy peach for DS1 and all the attachments, I've found it bulky, so you need a car, not for use on a bus, but it is so easy to put up and down. It converts into a double which is why I bought it as I hoped to have DC2 quite quickly.
Hope everyone is having a wonderful romantic valentines, I will be at the weekend when DH finally comes home Grin x 1000.
Take care everyone xx