The 'We are brooking no arguments whatsoever for an uneventful pregnancy and pain-free birth' thread

[Biscuitsandtea]

Ladies, our previous thread was getting full so here is a lovely new shiny home for us all.

I've put some comfy cushions around and plenty of pregnancy safe snacks and drinks. The Segway park is in the corner over there next to the stack of glittery vom buckets (plenty of extra buckets too for all the newbies).

In the corner over here you'll find our library of leaflets including sections on early pregnancy private scan clinics, pushchairs and car seats.

Hope you all like it very much :)

Hi everyone, I've been away for a few days and so I've missed loads! I've skimmed the nine pages that have happened while I was away, so I'm sorry if I've missed important things. Love and Musical, i'm glad your scans went well, and I look forward to hearing about your next scan, Musical.

I can't decide what to do about going to the GP. Strictly speaking, my surgery likes me just to collect a load of forms, fill one out for them and then phone up myself at 7 weeks to book my booking appointment and 10-13 week scan. Not seeing a GP or midwife at all before going to the hospital. Part of me is fine with this, but then another part of me wants to get to the GP and get on their radar. I don't know why, because it wouldn't stop a MC if one was going to happen anyway, and the GP would probably just send me away with all the forms. Such a dilemma! I think I'll wait until Monday (when I'll be 6 weeks) and then think about it again.

Hi Knittymum, if you want to see the Dr, do, I went a couple of days after my BFP as I wanted it on my records that I was pregnant as I would be off for testing if I had lost this one. And a head start on the forms is a good thing if you would be getting your booking notes? They take a long time to fill in. Just do whatever you feel comfortable with :)

I confirmed to my GP by phone that I was pregnant, but that was partly becasue I needed to extract myself from the infertility system! Am sure I would have done it anyway, though. I went in at about 5.5 weeks for blood pressure check. I would trot along - the worst they can do is think you are a bit precious (as I'm sure mine does .)

knitty I'm a GP and wouldn't think you were precious at all . In fact, most GPs should be delighted to see a healthy woman with some nice news. Brightens my day to be honest.

music my friend with twins delights in telling us the story of their first scan when her husband blurted out something along the lines of, "I wasn't even sure I wanted ONE". They are of course delighted with their 2 year old girls but still a shock to the system at first.

So glad to hear such good news from Musical and Love

Thank you all for letting me know about the caffeine recommendations.

I am rather embarrassed to say that I had no idea that caffeine intake might be connected to birth weight although I stuck to two cups a day last time anyway. I don't miss coffee at all but I do miss tea. Grumble grumble.

That's nice to hear, Deny - I was worried my GP would think I was wasting her time (but I went anyway!).

i'd pop along and see your gp - am sure they won't mind.

is it too cheeky to request some gentle brooking on my own behalf?

am now 27 weeks and the baby should be around 900g which is the weight DS was born at. This time with DS i was having twice weekly scans and being given survival percentages. was permanently in tears and barely functioning. DS was born at 31+4 which is only a month away.

have a growth scan booked in for next week which is a little nerve wracking to say the least and i'm pretty fed up of people saying:

a) your bump looks like its getting smaller (cheers really helpful. given you know my first son was only 2lb, do you really think that is the most sensitive comment you can make?)
b) you are so lucky to get another scan to see your baby (yes because i like to live in fear that they are going to find problems which may mean a lengthy battle of life or death in the best case scenario for my little bean)
c) ooh an early baby sounds good to me (really? because i promise you the reality is pretty shit)

all in all feeling rather wobbly. i'm definitely bigger than last time and gaining weight steadily. also vigorous movements from the bean mean that DH can finally feel them which he couldn't with DS. trying my best to be optimistic but due to above comments just need a bit of pom pom action

Hawthers how nerve wracking for you. Anyway - you can safely ignore what everyone else says - you always find people who are one day being told they're enormous and another day being told they're tiny - Obviously you have a whole lot more pressure on the size thing than most people, but don't forget, bump size isn't necessarily indicative of baby size. I've also heard stories of big bump but small baby, small bump but big baby, small bump and small baby and big bump and big baby!

I am Brooking. No. Argument - that baby of yours is growing like a good'un! Like you said DH can feel movements which is deffo a good sign.

And as for people saying silly things like early baby would be good - they are just being stupid - you've been through such a lot with your first one but I am taking no nonsense. This one will be stopping in there until you are at least at term!

I've forgotten now when you said your scan was (am on iPhone ) but I will be holding out for some great growth news for you

I see now - scan next week - while I'm brooking extra hard for you - do take care and keep popping in for a brooking uplift

Brooking hard, Hawthers! No time for proper post but sending nice sturdy baby vibes your way.

also brooking like mad over here hawthers. all sounds very promising from what you've said about movements and you gaining weight.

Why some people say such insensitive things is beyond me.

Hawthers - I have monthly growth scans from 20 weeks and everyone tells me I'm lucky. Even people who know how ill I was and how scared I get during pg with all the risks.
Annoying. Leave them too it. They're the bluming lucky ones!!

Hawthers - brooking for you. Try to stay positive, and ignore people's insensitive comments (easier said than done, I know). At least the scan isn't too far away :)

Deny - After DH ignoring the subject when I first mentioned it, I pointed out to him that several people had mentioned twins could be a possibility. He eventually said "Then we'll have twins" - but has pointed out it'll all be my fault. Which I suppose would be true, as twins are all down to the woman!

After more bleeding today (argh!), still hoping for one healthy bean, let alone more. Realised I think I bleed more when I move around more - wondering if something's in a silly place and is being agitated by movement? Could that be possible? Whereas yesterday I had a more relaxed day (asides from the whole exploding bladder and hospital experience), and there was significantly less. Hmmm.... busy day tomorrow, then quiet days over the weekend, so I suppose I can weigh it up then, provided it doesn't get tremendously worse.

Hawthers, brooking for you like mad! People are so annoying giving you gratuitous advice.

Aaaaaargh, I hate banks, I hate banks, I hate banks! They won't give me my money! Apparently I have to go into a branch with proof of address before they will release my savings. Naturally, I wasn't carrying proof of address and I couldn't get home and out to the bank before 5. DH is now sulking and says if I had gone into the bank at any point in the last year with proof of address this wouldn't have happened. I have no money in my current account but lots in my savings, but I can't get it, so I had to borrow petrol money off my sister to get home.

Hawthers lots of No Brooking coming your way! How ridiculous that people should say such thoughtless things to you! Your scan isn't too far away, soon you'll have confirmation that this little bean is perfectly healthy and growing really well. We are all Brooking No Argument that s/he won't be even considering an early exit! In the mean time though, I hope you manage to tune out the noise and focus on positive thoughts (easier said than done!).

Deny your story of the father of those twins made me laugh so hard I startled DH!

I know that simply by posting this message I'm dooming myself to sickness that is twice as bad tomorrow(!) but has anyone heard of sickness fading in week EIGHT?! I know this is just looking for trouble, and I was so whiny about feeling sick last week that I feel guilty even thinking this, but I'm a little nervous because for the last 2 days I really haven't felt that sick at all. I'm still completely unhungry - so I haven't been eating/drinking much (bad Scream!) but I haven't felt on the verge of throwing up all day like usual.

I'm just nervous because I really didn't expect any improvement before 12 weeks, and now I'm petrified it means my hcg level is falling! There hasn't been any cramping or bleeding so far which I'm very grateful for. I just wanted to know if you ladies had heard of this happening so early before (with a good outcome!)?

If I could just know that everything is fine with the little one then I'd be over the moon at the improvement! I feel alive for the first time in about 3 or 4 weeks! It's just that nagging fear...

hawthers never fear, no brookers are here! Heres for a chubby term hawthers baby, and im brooking no argument At. All. People are so blooming thoughtless in their comments, i cringe on their behalf!

I am ravenous every 3 hours! Im going to get so fat :(

scream, morning sickness isn't necessarily due to HCG, no-one really knows the cause, so it going doesn't point to anything bad. A friend of mine had twins and NO symptoms, whereas I was throwing up the whole time with my DS.

hawthers I'm also brooking for you like mad

I've had a chaotic couple of days in RL and have not even had time to turn on pc so I'm sorry I've not been on and posted before about your exciting scan news LoveIn and Musical. But I have been thinking of you both and I'm delighted to read that things are progressing well.

meconium so pleased your card idea went down well. Telling 2 excited grandmothers to be at the same time must have been entertaining. My mum and mil get on very well, but there's definitely a subtle bit of a competitive thing going on. Especially with my mum as DS is her 1st and only grandchild.

Have probably missed loads, but have only had time for a quick skim through.

I have also now told my parents. They are delighted but I sense apprehensive. This is after all the 3rd time I've told them I'm pregnant in less than a year, so I understand why the bunting didn't come out this time. They're very very happy I know, just worried for me that's all. Still, it's less than a week now until my next scan and I'll also be 9 weeks tomorrow! Haven't got that far since I had DS so it's all looking good still.

Hi all. Fantastic scan news. On new smart phone (yay!) So will try a
nd post properly later.

Hello everyone, just checking in with everybody's little bean news. Good to see no brooking is in full force. I am now 5+2 and have very few symptoms( nausea has eased this week) so almost feel I shouldn't be here. I will be phoning my GP next week to ask about the booking in process so hopefully will start having things to do to make it a reality.
I will keep checking in so I don't lose the thread! Thanks for listening!

I have just put my name down for NCT ante natal classes :/ i hope there nice to me i have never been to anything like it before! its in January and almost fully booked already
Im hoping it will all be ok now as I have paid the deposit! It should be im 14+5 today. Also started to think about how I am going to fit dd1 AND shrimp in the box room? or how I convince DH to move house?
found some ikea furniture that would be great and doing an overtime shift tomorrow to start saving.

Still really tired had two bad days of sickness but easing now.

hoping your all okay :)

hawkers sooooo brooking for you must be nice to see the baby but terrifying at the same time I didnt have growth scans really just a random scan at 35 weeks where they told me to expect a small baby approx 7 lb max. DD was 9.9lb :0

I meant Hawthers

Lots of brooking going on for you here, too, Hawthers.
I came to the conclusion that people think it is a compliment to tell you that your bump is tiny, a bit like saying you have lost weight or something. It drove me mad.
Thank you for letting me know about your antenatal care. I think I will ask next week what sort of pattern of care I can expect. Half of me wants them to say I can just see a midwife but the other half wants things to be a bit more medicalised this time just in case it goes a bit wrong again.

I am glad to hear about the positive reactions people have been getting from their parents and friends! I am waiting until after the 12 week scan to say anything. My mum tends to ask lots of questions and then tell me what the answer should be and I really don't want to talk about it yet (other than here, of course!).

hawthers, I think people just don't engage their brain before opening their gob... Totally insensitive. Early by a week is good, yes. Saying early is good to the mother of an ex-premature baby is dreadful. My friend who delivered at 31 weeks found her DS's time in special care very, very difficult (her baby was a whopping 5lb 11 already then, but has other difficulties, and still does). You seem to be doing differently in every way this time though, DH is feeling your baby kick, you're bigger than last time and there's no reason to believe it'll be the same is there? My friend with the 31 weeker had her second at a healthy weight, i think 6lb or so (her first would have been delivered early as so massive) at 35 weeks, with no problems after the birth for mum or baby.

I know what you mean in a small way with the opposite problem, as I was enormous with DD, didn't put weight on elsewhere and even lost a bit through morning sickness, but I was totally panicked about having an enormous baby which I wouldn't be able to deliver and have an EMCS- that was my fear (my bump measured 98th percentile but I could wear my normal size 10 jeans under the bump up to 28 weeks). All anyone said was 'oh my, but you're enormous! You must be due soon. Not for another 6 weeks?! My GOODNESS but you're big'. Opposite worry, but I still hated it, and it frightened the life out of me for labour/big baby complications. DD was 7lb 5.5 (not that it helped the third degree tear!)

meme, my friend loved nct classes, she met a couple of really good friends there. I reckon it'll be great! We moved when DD was 5 weeks so I don't have that worry, luckily... Lots of things can be fixed with furniture that helps, I reckon you've got the right idea (unless you a good persuader for a house move!)

My 'spare' car seat for my parents' cars arrived today, and goes in the front seat of our Focus, in front of the BeSafe!!!! The lady from the shop said over the phone therre was a very slim chance of it, but it goes...just!!!! I'm so blooming pleased we don't have to change our car to get 2 RF children in . Have seen pics of the BeSafe behind the drivers seat in a Mini (!!!!), and the Two Way Elite in a tiny car...can't rememeber what. But I'm very happy as I wasn't expecting it and was expecting a change-the-car battle with DH. It's not my first choice seat, but hey ho. It goes in!!!