seven I agree that ambition and determination is key. How should DH and I instil that into our kids without becoming pushy harridans or arrogant shits though... it's a tough one! I can't honestly say "work hard and you'll be rewarded" as every day at work I see people (often but not always women) quietly beavering away as hard or harder as someone else, but the other person (usually but not always a man) not only works hard but demands recognition for their work and as a result is valued more highly. "Work hard, demand recognition and be rewarded"? 
Oi I'm going to go for the homebirth I think. The nearest hospital does have a birth centre but I have heard almost universally poor feedback from other people who've gone there (heard over and over that women were left on their own for hours during labour, MWs completely overstretched and stressed) and the hospital as a whole has a very bad MRSA/C. diff track record. I don't want to go near it except in a total emergency when it really is the only option.
hawthers - I'd say get the book too and read it, or better yet take a course - there is more to it than just listening to the CD though that is also key. My DH was a bit 
until the science behind it was explained, which he found compelling (he still thinks it should be retitled "relaxation techniques" rather than hypnobirthing which he thinks sounds dumb). The causation links between pain, fear and tension should be obvious to your DH (as it was to me, a fellow corporate lawyer 
).
Tell him to think about how he feels when a deal is about to collapse or the other side kicks off about something - adrenaline causes blood to flow to extremities to prepare for fight or flight, heart starts pounding, blood pressure goes up, breathing quickens to increase oxygen to muscles, jaw clenches, shoulders tense.
But what do we want for birth - all muscles relaxing, cervix opening, blood flowing to baby/uterus/placenta to keep oxygen going to baby, slow heartbeat to keep blood pressure of mother and baby at a safe rate, slow breaths to prevent hyperventilation.
What do all other mammals do when they give birth - they find somewhere safe, warm, dark, calm and then they produce oxytocin which kicks labour off (when you are induced they basically pump you full of synthetic oxytocin). Apparently with first time mums you are most likely to start labour in the middle of the night in your own bed with your partner next to you after having had sex or copious cuddles - as that's when your oxytocin levels are highest and you feel safest.
And oxytocin and adrenaline are in a feedback cycle - when the level of one gets high, the other gets low. Makes sense right - if you're in a dangerous situation, you want labour to stop so you can get away: adrenaline up, oxytocin down, labour stops. Then when you're somewhere safe away from the danger, adrenaline down, oxytocin up, labour starts up again.
So you need to teach yourself how to relax yourself and keep your adrenaline levels down and oxytocin levels up, even when things hurt and you're afraid. Can you do it yourself? No - your DH is the ONLY person who can help you, because you're going to be too out of it to remember what to do, he has to keep calm and collected, he's the one you trust the most to be there with you, and you need to practice beforehand like you're preparing for a marathon. He is as essential a part of this whole thing as you are, and you need him to be fully engaged to make it work. (Obv you can have someone else help you if necessary but don't tell your DH that - also it's hard to get enough practice if you're doing it with someone you don't live with day to day).
My DH has said the thing he likes best about the whole process is how he feels with practice he will be able to calm me down and help me relax - he wants to be as needed and fully present at birth as he was at conception He also said it's something practical that we can do together to prepare, rather than just taking our chances on the day.