December 2011 - Support tights time!

[BeeMyBaby]

Had no idea what to call it, sorry. Just googled third trimester and that was the recommendation...

Haha jiggle - so did most of my friends and my DH, that's where we met

I went to an academic girl's day school in Hammersmith, to university across the pond which may start with an aitch and end in arvard and then a year freezing my bum off in that very same East Anglian icebox with a choral scholarship - DH was a third year atheist theologian - the rest is history. He now teaches that subject at the local secondary school - look up the thread and you'll see where I live, there's only one! - and I commute into the city and am a corporate lawyer specialising in carbon finance and environmental law.

(When asked, I always say I went to university "in Boston" - in the US this is considered preferable to "dropping the H-bomb"!)

PS no reciprocal reveals expected for the reasons you outlined plu - I tried to be oblique and not mention any full names...I do google myself often (for work! for work!) so I will know soon enough if it starts coming up in the searches!

at H-bomb.

hawthers I'm not proud to say I'm not sure how we'd cope if they weren't academic. Just being brutally honest. I think it would be difficult for us if one of our children was entirely different from us. Having said that, my sister isn't academic in the slightest and I think she's amazing!

DH went to Imperial, I went to Sheffield. We both did maths degrees and are now both qualified actuaries. Told you we were geeks!

I always feel slightly apologetic/embarrassed when I am asked where I went to uni - not sure why, apart from perhaps that people then tend to have certain perceptions of you related to that place. i wonder if we ever crossed paths tyelperion

hawthors - I don't actually mind that much how well DS and the next one do at school (at least I dont think I do at this stage) but I do hope they will have a certain level of intelligence yes. DH and I often say that we would be very happy for them to be plumbers or anything else and not go to uni (not that we will be able to afford it anyway!) I just want them to be happy , motivated and moderately successful in whatever they chose to do.

sorry must be being hyper sensitive today - i sort of read it like "unless they get into mensa i shall be ever so disappointed" - must try to regain some perspective!

Oh I forgot to say my degree was in applied maths and statistics but it doesn't really matter so much as at said seat of learning, you have a year to decide first, and one also does loads of different subjects which was so much better for me - in addition to my subject I did a year of linguistics, spanish, japanese literature and film, three years of chinese, music theory, human evolution, medieval manuscripts...the list goes on. I have to say, I liked my subject but am so so glad I got to do all those other things too.

It's not really academics I care about - it's really curiosity and interest in the world. But then I think - who is responsible for instilling that intellectual curiosity - me and DH. So we have to do our best to do so, within the bounds of their natural developmental stages, but also respect that they may develop different interests from me. It would be tough if those interests included a sports mania or being cool though, as these are things neither DH nor I know or care anything about

Loving the reveals. Me and DH both have degrees in Engineering/Computing (his a 1st from a Russell group uni - mine a little less shout worthy) and he is a Snr Tech Program Manager for an international software company in London, and I started out at an investment bank in London on the trading floor (in software not trading) and now run a large software development team for a specialist software company. We met at my/his previous company and we hit it off straight away. Down side of both being geeky and being in the same field is we know exactly what each other does at work and can have detailed conversations about this at home in the evenings which can be a bit of a yawn at times. Other downside is having me drop to a part time work pattern in my role is just not an option so I would either have to give up all together (not happening financially or from a sanity perspective) or try a different career and I have NO idea what that could be, so I work full time, so really looking forward to mat leave!

Tyel- I must be quite near you as I had my first in The Countess, would that be a backup option for you? They were good at my first birth and helped me stay active using birth ball etc despite being induced with a drip attached. I also love the idea of an athiest theologian, did he start the course like that?

On the issue of children's IQ I think if they are cared about and encouraged they are likely to acheive broadly similar levels to their parents, special needs aside. Really what concerns me more is whether mine are happy with their lives and have jobs they enjoy. I wouldn't want them pushing up the ladder and missing out on the other sides of life.

DH and I are fairly acedemic, I have a maths degree and he went to oxbridge so I suppose we assume our DC will be similar but with the cost of graduating maybe we'll pursuade them to do something more practicle and learn on the job!

Oh tell me about it jiggle - I refuse to see the social network for exactly this reason (ie. it's total bullshit). I was warbling away in clare choir for the 05-06 academic year and working p/t at the careers service - maybe you were there too?

pippy I know some large investment banks and corporates nowadays have some or all of their software development people working full-time, but remotely - would that be possible in your line of work?

I am sitting here literally laughing at the geektasticness of all of us - what's the collective noun for pregnant nerds?

having chipped in, i should fess up that DH is a city lawyer and i work for the biggest of the big 4 in tax structuring - we're a barrel of laughs. not too sure we qualify for the geekiest couple title though - phew!

Collective nouns:

A bump of pregnant nerds
A hothouse ....

Hmmmm, actually, I like "a push of pregnant nerds" the best!

Mine is a language background, Oxbridge; DH maths/computing, same 'varsity.

Interesting discussion! I went to Cambridge and out of the 7 girls I lived with, one is a SAHM, one works for the church (and earns around £8k I reckon), one works in publishing and doesn't earn v much, one is an NHS physio, one is doing a phd and the other is a lawyer. With the exception of the lawyer, I think that most tradespeople e.g plumbers/electricians earn more than we do and have nicer houses/cars etc.! I think work ethic and ambition is definitely more of a driver to financial success than academic ability.

Dh runs a charity so we are certainly not rolling in it but I feel very "successful" as I achieved everything I wanted academically (used to be a lawyer) and have a wonderful family/home/work-life balance etc. I have a lot of lawyer friends and although they earn megabucks they also have megamortgages and feel like they HAVE to carry on being lawyers just to pay the mortgage and keep up their standard of living despite the fact that they all hate their jobs and are always always in the office!

Good afternoon ye geeks! I 'spose I should 'fess up to going to a normal uni, I knew exactly what I wanted to do as a career, so I went to the only uni in the country that allowed me to do marketing with two languages throughout. (But is was a uni, and not a poly - I'm that old - and was a snob about it). And now I am the Vice President of Marketing at a multinational company. So I'm not a lawyer or banker, but I hope that my very silly American job title gets me entry into nerd-tasticness. I married the UK IT manager where I work, so he can help out with the geek-factor. :)
(Just back from my big-baby-scan - and after over an hour's wait again - I have been told: yes it's a big baby, but within the average size ranges, so nothing to worry about.)
And the MW said that if I don't feel the baby kick or move more than ten times per day, I should ring in. Never heard that before.

I should add that my IT manager DH is no longer a geek. He gave up the desk job to drive a white van and do manual work, and was much happier for it - despite the halving of his salary. :)

OiMissus, it's interesting what you said about languages with something else. Good move! I realised after university that UK language graduates are at a disadvantage in this, as many of our courses didn't allow any other specialisations, compared to, e.g. Continental graduates, who basically ended up better qualified. Moreover, it's far more acceptable to make mistakes in English than in pretty much every other language, so didn't I choose a rubbish subject?! No wonder journalism (the destination of many language graduates) is (a) so competitive and (b) so insecure: there are so many people there, terrified thinking the barrier to entry was so low in terms of subject knowledge. Professional qualifications and technical expertise must give you a lot more standing to eff off those who pressure you to do unethical things and accept crappy pay! Not that I know much about being able to demand better pay...

Joining in with the geekiness...DP went to an ordinary comp, but is so amazingly talented (not that I'm biased or anything!) an artist that he sailed into St Martins and is happily designing away now. He is digital art obsessed.

I went to a naice all girls school, then did psychology at Durham, used to work as a counsellor in a referral unit for violent teenagers (I did my masters alongside it, then had DD1 the summer I finished my masters) and am a SAHM at the moment but aiming to go back to work when DD3 is 3 or so. I get very very geeky over attachment theories and disorder and child raising in general. DP and I are planning to both work part time so we can continue HE.

Alternatively, we'll move on to my Dad's small holding when he starts to need help, live in a yurt and indulge our hippy fantasies .

If we lived in the SE we'd be poor, but houses are so cheap here that we're pretty well off!

An impressive list of degrees, unis and jobs! I was at the all girls college (but not the new one!) over the same time period as you tyelperion - that was my first year and DHs second year.

However I now work in a relatively low paid job (teacher - part time at the mo) having tried one of the big four accountancy firms post uni for a year, but I do feel generally happy and fulfilled in this career choice and like the holidays!! Out of my closest friends at uni none of them would be classed as really successful in terms of wealth or prestige but they remain an interesting and fun bunch of people who do lots with their lives outside of work. DH is a consulting engineer and very good at it, but is always somewhat resentful of the low pay compared with his contemporaries who went into banking, consultancy etc. We have also m oved to a lovely rural area in the last 2 years and to a small firm - the area is considered "the death of ambition" as nice area, good work life balance and too far away from London to really earn mega bucks, but we are happy with the choice (most of the time) and we can be on a variety of beaches in 20 mins or so or in the countryside within 5-10 mins.

just come back from the doctors with DS. No chest or ear infection and did not seem too concerned that his temp was nearly 40 degrees. Poor boy

I was actually wondering about you, msbuggywinkle, with your attending the feminist conference and home educating, which has got to demand a certain level of confidence in your own education!

The yurt sounds lovely. Will you supplement it with techie things like solar heating or a wind turbine? I imagine ebooks would assist with keeping the clutter down, too!

(Please forgive the detailed questions; I started wondering about this when some friends were building a narrowboat to live in. That was just before mobile internet came out, and of course now mobile internet is a boon to anyone trying to live less plugged into the grid!).

plu No worries, I can go on all day...I'll try not to though The yurt plan is a 6m main room yurt, which will have a big futon and be lined with bookcases. Then the DDs will have 3m 'satellite' yurts so they have their own space. We'll have a wood burning stove (we do now and I loooooooove it) and (here is where I sound like a loon) I make our own beeswax candles anyway, we rarely use our electric lights now. Our only tech is likely to be DP's computer for work and various laptops which we can power from a wind turbine (I have a friend who is a wind power geek!).

My Mum lives on a narrow boat with her partner, we spend quite a lot of time with them and it would be my first choice but not very practical with 3DDs. Maybe when we retire!

Re home ed, I know people from all walks of life who HE successfully, people who left school after A levels to people with PhDs, to people who grew up in countries where women don't get much education at all.

Lots of East Anglian 'old' uni members - me too! I also went to the other place as well. I confess that I am an uber-geek! But I still feel strongly that I want my kid to be relaxed and do what they are interested in - not what I am interested in. Just 'cos I am a total academic nerd does not mean I expect them to be. And my friends from both places are in a range of careers, from high powered and well paid to relaxed and badly paid. Equally, friends from other universities, or who didn't go to university have a similar mix of careers. I really don't want to be a helicopter parent. My parents were so relaxed when we were growing up and didn't put on the pressure academically, which was great. Some of my siblings were academic geeks and some weren't, but we are all doing fine now, academic ones not necessarily better than the others. So I hope to be able to emulate my parents. They gave us a great environment to learn in and music lessons and tons of books but more or less left us to it.

OMG i'm in a thread full of people from Fenland Polytechnic!

I met DH when we were both studying at The Other Place.

(and my degree was the only sciency one that lasted six years...Don't tell!.)

Am I the only one without a degree (or even A-levels)? I like to think I'm pretty intelligent, enough so that I have no doubts about my ability to HE. I got good grades in my GCSE's and did start doing A-levels, I wanted to be a journalist. However with the benefit on hindsight I'll admit I threw it all away. Still, sliding doors and all that, if I'd gone to uni I wouldnt have got involved in a longterm relationship with my now DH when I was 17. I wouldn't be married and I wouldn't have DS so I'm not complaining.

And how about a conference of geekmamas? Or a gestation of nerds?