August 2011 - 2nd trimester blooming - not us!

[KTisPG]

New thread for us August 11 ladies

KLou we use washables and they're about to go on our third child, we must have saved hundreds and hundreds of pounds, you're making an excellent choice! I'm afraid BF cost me a fortune though - I leak so badly I had to have a new bra every day and buy breastpads for 6 months - I leaked straight through all the washable ones and found tommee tippee disposables the best. Probably undid all the good I had done to our bank balance by using washable nappies!

Yukana I just added a rant in your defence on the end of your AIBU thread, I hope it doesn't kickstart people being nasty again but I couldn't ignore the stupid, ignorant things they were saying about you and your DP. Can't believe people are so horrible sometimes. I've added my suggestions on your original post as well, both DH and I have indulged in the habit of late night computer gaming at different times, so hope it's helpful. I also noticed that you mentioned about saving for further education. I happened to be looking into this for a colleague last night and was surprised that there's quite a bit of potential funding out there to help with further or higher education (more than I thought). If your DP would be interested, I am copying and pasting the email I sent to my colleague yesterday below. There's stuff about loans for college courses; and if he doesn't have a first degree there's quite a bit about higher education loans and grants as well.

Sorry people were so nasty, glad this thread is friendlier :)

"Was just googling the possibilities of funding higher education for adults. A couple of possibilities:
www.direct.gov.uk/en/EducationAndLearning/AdultLearning/FinancialHelpForAdultLearners/CareerDevelopmentLoans/DG_10033237 (non higher education)

www.direct.gov.uk/en/EducationAndLearning/UniversityAndHigherEducation/StudentFinance/Gettingstarted/index.htm (Higher education)

It might be possible to get a Child Care grant too

www.direct.gov.uk/en/EducationAndLearning/UniversityAndHigherEducation/StudentFinance/Extrahelp/DG_171503

With the huge increase in tuition fees planned for 2012/13 it may be worth looking at 2011/12 courses!!

"The maximum tuition fee a university or college can charge is:
? £3,290 for 2010/11
? £3,375 for 2011/12
? £9,000 for 2012/13
The increase in the maximum tuition fee rate to £9,000 in 2012/13 only applies if you?re entering university or college for the first time in September 2012 or later."
www.direct.gov.uk/en/EducationAndLearning/UniversityAndHigherEducation/StudentFinance/Applyingforthefirsttime/DG_174046
"

Thank you for all the help Bryher, and your advice was much appreciated on the topic. I'll bear what you said in mind and be easier on DP in the mornings.

I am however, at the end of my daily tether quota, so please excuse me for a second whilst I rant.

We have a baby fund of my money that I've asked Mom to keep a hold of so I don't spend it - £800. I've spent some of the money on baby stuff, but mostly it's okay. DP has been going on about wanting a new laptop since October so I finally caved in and let him take the money out of the fund so he could buy one. I said he is allowed the money, on the condition that he tries to go to bed by 1am. (I think this is a reasonable time, I usually go to bed beforehand too. Let me know what you think on the matter). In response to this, I got a hefty grumble, non-verbal, but a sort of 'sigh'. I think you know what I mean.

I've just come back from a day out at Bristol, worried I overdid it as I'm not exactly the most active person (due to a lazy two months before the pregnancy, grrr at myself) and had to walk up quite a few hills etc, plus having to cope with a stiff back all day. I'm quite tired.
DP has gone out to buy his laptop, and then come home, playing world of warcraft it seems. I tell him I'm feeling rather hungry a little while after coming in (not just walking through the door mind you) and he says "Why not make yourself something then?" with a smile. I ask him if he could make something or go down to the chip van, and he grumbles again.

It honestly annoys me when he grumbles at me asking for things. Asking if he can massage my back, asking if perhaps he could tidy the room a bit.. I don't know what to say to him. Perhaps I've nagged too much? Said too much? Although I'm not entirely sure what I might've said. Sometimes I feel he is a bit ungrateful. Again, could be me overthinking/being stupid. Do say so if I am.

Hi all

Just catching up, haven't been on here for too long! Lovely to hear about everyone's scans :) Am excited for my next one (23rd March, 19 weeks). Heard heartbeat when went to 16 week midwife appt, and before that with consultant at hospital, such a relief :) Have also had a GTT (screening for gestational diabetes) and that must have come back clear as they haven't rung me, so happy about that too. I have a high BMI, but surprisingly when I weighed in at midwives I'd lost a kilo!! Suspect it is down to morning sickness, and she said I shouldn't worry about losing weight in early stages.

RE maternity clothes - I'm really struggling! Esp with trousers. I'm size 20 normally, and I'm short - only 5 foot, it's really hard to find clothes that fit. I got some nice leggings from Red Herring, which miraculously were the right length, but they're not great for work. Have tried buying off ebay but so far have ended up with smart trousers from Mamas and Papas which are so bizarrely flared at the bottom and too long; and some black jeans which are way too long and don't really sit right, the bit which is meant to go over your bump sits too low so it shows below my tops. My new plan is to try and get some maternity long tunics or dresses which I can wear with the leggings.

Sorry for those who have colds, mine cleared up in end, but every night I get sniffly and start coughing and sneezing, not sure if it's pregnancy rhinitis or I'm having a worse allergic reaction to our cats than normal- drives me mad

Welcome Charleigh , expectantbean! , Alice and anyone new I've missed, I'm really not keeping up....

First timer here, I haven't bought any baby things yet, but hoping to get some second hand stuff from my cousin so waiting to see what I get from there first! Have been baffling myself with car seats recently, no idea what to get. I am planning to go to Newcastle to a baby roadshow tomorrow, if I muster up the energy! If anyone's local:
www.wherecanwego.com/search/ViewEvent.aspx?e=367610

bettyboo thanks for the link for nearly new sales, v useful :)

Leilandri sorry to hear you've had sad news, hope you're OK. Yay for unexpected early scan though and confirmed CS date though :)

I'm so impatient to feel baby move, I know it's early for a first timer though!

Yukana No, I don't think you're being unreasonable at all, and would really expect him to be more appreciative when you've just bought him a new laptop! I have similar issues with mealtimes with my DH, as he does the washing up and I do the cooking, but have been struggling with energy recently. I've found hints, like "oh I'm hungry and too tired to cook" get me absolutely nowhere, but if I come right out and ask him to sort food out he does.

Don't know what to suggest, but it does sound to me like he is getting a little too obsessed with WoW; and I reckon he should be looking after you better while you are pg. Good luck with getting him to listen.

(for tonight, if you can afford and he won't sort out dinner, I suggest a takeaway by delivery, save yourself some energy)

Yukana no I don't think you are being unreasonable but I think its an area where a lot of men seem to have similar faults! I am always saying to mine to try and get him to help out a bit, he does work long hours though but I feel like once he comes home he clocks off and literally will do nothing - wont put out his own food onto the plate, dirty plates in sink, clothes in washing basket or any of those basic things! and I am looking after 2 yr old and 1 yr old (both who wake up still at night!) and pregnancy itself is tiring but somehow sometimes they dont quite "get" it so you have to keep reminding them and as bryher said ask them directly for things because otherwise they will remain oblivious.

oh and bryher my scan is on the same day
i have got gtt scheduled too, was panicking the other day thinking when is it that i hadn't written my apt down but then realised its not til may, which is later than i thought. reallyy hope it doesn't come back positive! i had last time and was really worried but it came back ok, so hope same again.

I have just made a shed load of cup cakes with my dd and now she's in bed I'm going to treat myself to one!

yukana sometimes you need to get them on their own no distraction and spell it out in black and White that you need a little more help as your struggling. My Dp only realised when I fell down the stairs last time that I needed a hand. ( he does most of the housework do he's not too bad usually but I still needed looking after) I think that's what Dp likes about me being preg that he gets to look after me and I let him!

I hit a wall today and spent the entire time my dd was napping 2 hours shivering in bed. I want my bp to rise!

Firawla Yay for scan day :) May sounds normal for first GTT, I have a second one then, I had an extra early one because I was just under BMI=40 and they do an early one at that threshold Fingers crossed it's all OK, I'd convinced myself I'd got it so was v relieved they haven't rung me!

MrsVidic :( Hope your bp rises soon and you feel better. Hope the cupcake helps too!

Welcome and congrats Alice :)

I WANT TO KNOW THE SEX, no fair!!! DH doesn't want to know and I DO want the whole it's a boy/girl thing, but I just want to know NOW!!! :)

Found a fab pram/pushchair/travel system here,bit pricey, but my mum and dad said they'll buy the pram, just got to break the news of the price!! Not sure where to buy it from, as not done a lot of searching around. I just LOVE the car seat, fab invention, and means you don't have to have a pushchair section, pram section and car seat. It was in my Tesco baby and toddler mag I got today. Also 3 wheels, which I wanted, and all terrain which is a must for us as we walk a lot in the nearby forest and beach :)

Yukana just tried to message you a few useful looking weblinks, let me know if you don't get them as I've not used messaging on Mumsnet before...

Got the message, sent a reply. :) Me and DP are happy as we found part-time engineering courses both level 2 and level 3 ones, nearby. I really hope he gets in one, it'll make him so much happier.

Hello to the newcomers.

Good luck with the courses Yukana. I was astounded by some of those womens reactions to your thread. Stay here with us and we'll look after you.

Nice pram Klou. I'd love something similar but as a city dweller with a rather small car I'm having to go for a permanent car seat and smaller pram system. I rather fancy the icandy cherry but once again the price is a bit Various family members have offered to contribute which is nice. We're also being given quite a lot of things that friends and family don't need anymore - i guess that's the advantage to being one of the last of my friends to start a family :)

Hope everyone has a great weekend.

I'll keep away from posting in AIBU from now on. :) There were some lovely people in there, but a lot of what they call 'judgey-pants' too.

I bought two support pillows from mothercare, one of which is huge and the other is a wedge. They are wonderful and would highly recommend them! I slept very well last night. They also have some leg and foot cooling menthol spray to ease muscles and aches, I haven't tried it yet but I'm looking forward to giving it a go.

As for cars, I wish me and DP had at least one between us, as between my mother, me, DP, and my grandparents - there is only one car. It's quite problematic. But considering a £500 second-hand car would cost £2200+ to insure each year, it's a no-go. :(

Going pram shopping today! Excited! (about everything except the price!) Heading to kiddicare near Peterborough which is supposed to be good for test-driving prams.

Have a honking cough now and have to bend over when i cough otherwise I feel like I'm coughing from exactly where the babies are. Poor things, they've been through the mill this week with all my poorly-sickness.

Anyone know what chesty-cough medicines are safe to take when preggers?

Klou I know exactly how you feel! Im in the same boat as you!! I WANT TO KNOW NOW too! but DH doesnt!! Still have 2 more weeks to go until my scan and i dont know what to do!! I sooooo want to know. Loved the travel system you've recommended by the way. Its a bit pricey but looks very good.. Im going to do some research to figure out if its good for us. Thanks!

I have come down with a bad cold since last evenin - Runny nose, headache and sneezing all the time.. Havent slept well at all and been up since 6 am this moring cause i couldnt breathe well whilst i was lying down !! I hope all the sneezing is not going to bother my little bubba too much! I've taken hot water steam twice since this morning but im still miserable :( ..need some TLC

Anyone know what I can do to make this go away? Also is vicks vapourub ok to use when pregnant?

anu I think it's ok, if not it will say on the tub.

I have really bad back ache after doing the big shop then chasing dd round next while she was shouting 'jeans, jeans!' the staff thought she was adorable but I seriously wanted to cry! I still managed to spend fifty quid on some clothes for her though! I'm sure I went in there to find maternity clothes for me

I need to sleep but dd won't nap!

Hey everyone, and hello newbies :) we're all lovely here, you're in safe hands.

Firawla and Yukana, I think I'm right in thinking you're both young (compared to my mid 30's oldness! ) Please don't think I'm being patronising, but this is something I really wish I'd been told in my early 20's- boys are a) rubbish and b) need everything spelling out to them. You need to tell them, straight, what is wrong with what they're doing, not so you're critical, but they cannot pick up on hints and sighs like girls do. They're just not made that way!

My 20 wk scan is 04/04/11 - so 3 weeks yet. We're finding out because I want to, DH doesn't really, but I made the point that it's not him getting stretch marks and going through labour. He saw it a bit differently after that :)

I went to mothercare last weekend and was nearly in tears trying to fathom the difference between prams and travel systems (whatever that means!) and the prices.... omg! So I gave it up as a bad job and bought myself 4 new pairs of shoes in new look. My fantastic SIL is going to help us choose one. Going to anearly new sale in Leeds tmoz if anyone's vaguely local- it's at the Sikh centre on chapeltown rd if yr interested.

So jealous of everyone's 20wk scans! Think I felt the baby a couple of days ago - it was like fingers tapping, but on the inside - does that sound right? Haven't felt it since tho but I'm only 17wks so I guess it's early? When I turn over in bed though I can feel a heaviness shifting across, will that be the baby?

Sorry for epic post :) am loving hearing all your tales though, I come in every day and catch up on everyone's news.

oh pram shopping how exciting. what one you thinking of getting? i've seen some nice ones for twins i think icandy or something like that? but expensive!
i will just have to stick with my p&t i think, put it back to baby and toddler mode instead of with the 2 seats. so one less thing to buy, but it is fun to go and look at the different ones so i feel a bit missing out as i dont have to do it

hope everyone's colds gets better! not sure about the vicks?
i feel like getting a slight cold but not too bad, hopefully wont get any worse. caught it off my 1 yr old i think, poor thing had quite a bad cough

I think by travel system they mean carry cot, car seat, pram, pushchair all in one Jenny, that's what we're going to get :)

Sorry about all the colds, just a stuffy nose here, but not a 'cold' :)

Off into town now to watch the Welsh Rugby game x

Jenni
I'm eighteen, so you were correct and no, not patronising at all. :)

I smiled at the 20 week scan and stretch marks comment! My DP doesn't really mind, we're both just excited to be making a family.

DP and I went looking at prams and car seats last week! It was very exciting but I think DP's enthusiasm wore off quickly! We liked the Silver Cross 3D Vogue which was small and light and the BeSafe fixed car seat which has won loads of awards. It's very expensive but lasts until the baby is 4 so prob cheaper in the long run. Anyone have any experience of these two things? It's so complicated!!

jenni my next scan is the same day as yours!

Our new buggy arrived yesterday! We've got the maclaren techno XT (a great umbrella fold) as our experience with DD was that after the first couple of months of needing a pram, the big buggy was just too bulky and we used our umbrella fold (a mamas and papas one) the whole time, it was so small and light and folded easily and took up no space in the car. That buggy died after several years faithful service and was ceremonially taken to the tip last week, and a shiny new one arrived in its place yesterday! DD is nearly 4 so we're trying to make her walk more (having a phil & teds with 2 seats means that being lazy is often an option for her) so we'll revert to just the maclaren for DS (2 1/2) so she has to walk or ride her bike. Then DS will have to do more walking/learn to ride a bike when the baby comes, coz I only want to take the small light buggy out with me!

For congestion, try inhaling steam over a bowl with a tea towel over your head. The steam alone will work wonders even without any fragrant oils in it (so my MIL says, and she seems to know what she's talking about!).

Hello everyone, I was on this thread a million years ago but moved house and have been broadbandless for ages. Finally back online so hope to catch up with everyone again. Apparently I am still pregnant Heard heartbeat at mw appt a couple of weeks ago and have 20wk scan a couple of weeks from now. Hopefully we will find out the sex. Both of us are far too nosy to be able to wait, plus with a houseful of boy clothes it makes good economic sense to find out if we're having a girl.

Hope everyone is doing okay :)