The great PESH dispenser

[Muser]

Here we go again:

BESH BAYBEES

dontrythisathome, girl born March 25.
Cheggers, twinz girlz, born April.
FannyPriceless, boy, born June 8.
CurlyCasper, girl, born June 24.
CUNextTuesday, boy, born June 29.
AlpinePony, boy, born 1 July.
Carrots, boy, born July.
IggyPiggy, girl, born July.
Cosmosis, boy, born Sept 5.
Backinthebox, boy, born Sept 7.
Skatergrrrl, girl, born Sept 10.
VAG, boy, born Oct 2.
Silversky, boy, born Nov 1
SomethingSuitablyWitty, girl born Nov 2
okiecokie, girl, born Nov 12
Honeymoo, boy, born Nov 11
ReginaMonologue, boy, born Nov 13
Maswera, boy, born Dec 24
PollyPoo, girl, born Jan 5?
MrsFC, boy, born Jan 7

UPDIFFED

ChoChoSan, "and Lo! The lord did resurrect her petrified womb", due 31 Jan
CluckyKate, hatching an egg, due February 2
Perfect Dromedary, defied medical science, due February 24
Muser, blooming at last, due February 27
Ginhag, reckless cake-carrier, due 28th Feb
Medee, has a deceptive bump, due March 12
Casserole, completely out of witty things to add, due April 8
Scorpette, now carrying a RL baby in addition to Clothilda and the squid, due 18th May.
Laurielou, the unmarried hussy with the "surprise" diff, due 31 May (ish)
Rocketleaf, no longer jealous of morning sickness, due 1 June.
TwinkleToes, supergluing her fanjo shut, due 20 June.
Orchid, hoping for a zen like child, due 1st July
Ginfox, loving the new mega-boobs, due 12th July.
LadyGoneGaga, Has lost her waist, due 24 July
Ivegotmrbitey, Marmite is a lovely name for a baybee, due 27th July.

Ah lovely news bootycall I can't believe she can have a guess at the flava already! Innnnnteresting. Also good you can relax about the feeling movement for a bit too.

Gorgeous news boots! I love scans and want them every week! We don't have nuchals in my trust so am trying very hard not to think about it until the blood test next week.

rocket can I come to your house for tea please? I think we are going to have "freezer medley" tonight and the thought is making me very depressed!

ladyGG I am an intolerant bitch to anyone that dares cross my path. I really can't help it but I imagine being trapped in a room with me is similar to being trapped with an angry bear. And some killer bees.

I know, I thought preggos were meant to be all calm and wearing a beatific and serene smile. I'm like a tasmanian devil when I'm not asleep.

I am permanently cantakerous. It has nothing to do with being up the duff

However I am finding myself somewhat sleep deprived due to night-time ligament stretching weirdness which is making me more grumbly than usual.

Yes Rocket I was also a bit gobsmacked but she does have a top notch scanner. Have decided not to really believe it just yet as do not want to start thinking of it as him then find out it isn't. Although oddly I'd decided last week it was a boy so was already kind of doing that.

Bitey tis a right bum they don't do nuchal thingy in your area but tbh the NHS 20 minute job I had last week was a complete bust anyway so I too would have had to wait for the bloods had I not gone private. I think the blood tests are supposed to be v.reliable though and do not rely on Mini-bitey behaving which is a big plus.

Yay for top Booty scan! (Sorry if that sounds like you've been photocopying your arse* ) Sounds like amazing detail - and wow that they can kinda tell the sex already; you must have a regular little Errol Flynn on your hands

I have an anterior (front) placenta too and didn't feel anything until 20 wks - felt some mild 'popcorn' sensations on Xmas Day, which was the best gift of all - but didn't feel an actual kick until a few days after my scan, which was 21 weeks. Think he was all 'yeah, I'm really here!' :) Still can't feel/see anything from the outside, but know it'll come. I bet your experience will be similar.

They never gave me the numbers for my nuchal scan, just said it was 'completely normal', which is basically the same, innit.

I'm a right mardy cow all the time usually but have been amazingly less so since about 20 weeks. Think it's being in pain that's dampening my fire, not Earth Mother-ness I feel more vulnerable and prone to random crying over nowt, if anything.

Have taken Ranatidine. Fingers crossed this helps the headaches! I need it, cos MC Hammer downstairs is delighting me with his second day of deafening DIY noise

*Again.

Blood test booked am very forgetful when I haven't got the arse! Been examining the scan photos and decided there is definitely a little nose there . Although it could be an arm? I don't really have A clue!

at owlies christmas party photocopying antics scorps

Lady I sometimes wear a serene and beatific smile ala the Madonna but that is when people should be really afraid!

I'm amazed they can tell you've got a blue owlet already boots! How lovely! Will you find out for sure at the next scan? I can't decide if I want a surprise or if a baybee will be nuff of a surprise anyway!

Waaah! The friend I posted about the other day (IVF after testicular cancer) just had her baby this morning. Lovely big boy born at home. She sounds absolutely smitten. Soooo happy for them!!!!

aw congrates to your friend lady thats really lovely!

I am pretty zen at the moment but I think thats because I am not working much. I would probably be terrifying if I still was working full time and had the commute to do. Mad respec to those of you doing it is all I can say.

Hoorah!!! Lovely news :) Extra lovely to get a home birth.

Bitey probably will find out at the next scan if possible, just to see if the doc was right.

My commute is only 15 minutes by car so can't complain on that front. But the working...My problem is I feel guilty about working full time and being away from MiniG which makes me resentful of job and extra grumpy to be here. But only 88 working days left to go, hey! Going to try and go back three days afterwards I think. Really need a better work/life balance.

I honestly did love maternity leave last time, took full year and wasn't desperate to go back at all - he was just getting really interesting at that point!

What are you aiming to do afterwards, Rocket? I guess you can be bit more flexible being a freelance type?

As little as possible for as long as possible!! Yeah, I hope I am going to be able to freelance. I suspect that my last job who I am now doing bits and bobs for would have me back if the timing is right. But its an hour+ commute so I wouldn't want to do it more than 3 days a week (ideally one day at home, 2 in office but that might be pushing it!) as I probably wouldn't see Sprout at all the days I worked. :(

The ideal freelance is getting a long term contract a few days a week WFH and just going in for meetings. Short term ones tend to be all or nothing, massive work load 5-6 days for a week or so and then nothing which is obviously going to make childcare difficult. I think I am just going to have to cross that bridge when I come to it!

I am a moody cow at the best of times, pregnancy does not bring out the best in me.

Have persuaded TBG to go to the chip shop and get me proper chips. With either a fishcake or a battered sausage. So wrong. But so right. I want some big fat chip shop chips so badly.

Next week is my last week in the office! Woot. I am very glad to be going as things are not looking great there. Cost savings, possibility of redundancies. At least it may solve my dilemma of whether to go back full/part time or not at all.

Mmmm, big fat chippy chips, ghghghghnghghgnngh

Huzzah and hurrah for LadyGG's pal! Homebirth after all that stress and a beautiful, perfect baybee - everything does come to they who wait :)

Sounds like you're going on ML at just the right time, Muse. And if things do go pear-shaped as regards those possible redundancies, then it can often feel quite a relief to have a difficult dilemma (ie SAHM or WOHM) solved for you.

Also sounds like everyone is being pretty pragmatic about working as a mum. If there's one v good lesson that TTC and being pg have taught me, it's that worrying too much doesn't make anything better or worse and doesn't make things miraculously happen and that when something does happen then it's for the best or you cope, at least. Oooh, get me, Guru Scorps.

My freelance writing was just taking off when I got pg and have been too ill to pursue it as rigorously as I would've done otherwise, but I have kept in regular contact with my, erm, contacts and am v friendly with them and have kept my hand in with easy stuff like reviewing and the odd bit of unpaid short editing/blog contribution, so all that plus the fact I do it from home make me confident I can be a SAHM and earn a crust that way. Want to be solely a SAHM for at least a year, mind. Am lucky that TYF supports this and will really muck in and pull his weight and wants to be as hands-on as poss. (and he might be able to rejiggle his work to do 9-5 instead of usual 9-6 and work 1 day at home for the same wage).

We also have plans for our own bidniz, but is more of a pipe-dream at this stage.

I am very aware that I am in the "my diamond shoes are too tight" position of actually having a real choice over whether to go back to work or not. We can pay our mortgage without my salary. I'm really very lucky. I sometimes feel unfeministy for thinking that maybe I wouldn't go back. But then I realise I'm just conforming to the idea that career is everything and child rearing has no value. So bollix to that. I shall do what feels right when the time comes.

At the moment I am utterly stuffed full of chips. We really shouldn't have ordered two portions. T'was good though.

Being a SAHM can be v powerful and feministy. My Mum became a full-time SAHM after my bro was born (went back p-t when I was 18mnths, I was nearly 4 when bro was born) and she did her degree, did huge amounts of charity and voluntary work, was involved in political activism (was at Greenham Common, etc.) and set up our city's first language teaching programme to teach immigrant woman English and empower them, etc. And she was there for us at home time with kisses, cuddles, chat about our day, lots of fun and attention and a home-cooked meal. Of course, my Dad is a dude who always did housework and childcare as equally as his work allowed.

You do what feels right, Muse - that's exactly the right 'tude you've got there :)

As a feminist, am quite excited about having a son to 'raise right' IYKWIM

BTW, to those ESH who are working mums or who will be through choice or no choice, I was in my 20s before I knew my Mum had worked when I was so little (I still can't remember her not being there or missing her, etc.), so let that reassure you that, done right, it really doesn't affect your kids!

Now you've put the thought of chips in my head too Muse, no fair! Not enough to actually do anything about it though.

Hurrah for good scan results Owlie, and I'm amazed she shared an opinion on the sex so early (given how paranoid they are around here about making sure you know they might get it wrong).

I'm another mardy cow, although how much of that's pregnancy related is debatable. The poor colleague I share lifts with got full force grumpiness on the way home from a couple of meetings last week when I was completely knackered and not up for having my time taken up by things which weren't relevant and I added nothing by being there. Or by people who seem to live on a different planet to everyone else, and try to force agendas based on the awkwardness of a minority. This week I've not been to any meetings and so am wonderfully serene. Well, sort of.

You were all right about the dullness of booking appointments, although it was made slightly more interesting by having a student practise on me (although not taking blood thank goodness! - I don't mind being a guinea pig for most things but not needles). So now I get to wait for a consultant's appointment which will hopefully involve them saying 'that's nice, go away', and more interestingly the scan next week. Then maybe it'll start to feel real....

The first scan will be anything but dull, Occers :) The waiting about before and afterwards, however... it's worth it, that's the best you can say about that!

The one thing that used to drive me mad about meetings is that there's always one arsehole who starts asking pointless questions/bringing up irrelevant points just as things are drawing to a close and everyone has to hang round cos of the twat, who will invariably just keep going on and on whilst everyone else is trying not to shove 2 pencils up their nose and bang their head against the table in frustration.

Morning!

Yesterday's absence was due to attending a pointless meeting, with suited idiots just arguing.

Muse good news on the lack of US trip. Even better news on the chippy chips. Is it wrong to be drooling at 8.30am?

Owly excellent news on scan. I wish I could be scanned every day - I love it!

LadyG thanks for the friend update. And what an update! Its made me feel all warm & fuzzy.

Mr Loz & I were discussing hormones & mardiness this morning. I'm lucky in that I've never really been a slave to hormones. I'm normally quite a mellow, fairly cheerful soul & I have it on good authority that hasn't changed much since diffment. Don't get me wrong, when I do lose my temper it isn't pretty, & there are days filled with tears & snot, but thankfully they are few & far between. That's the kiss of death now, isn't it

Guess where Mr Loz & I are heading this weekend? Good ole London Town! Its a flying visit - we had vouchers last Christmas off MIL, one of those boxes with "Choose your present" kind of things. There were lots we fancied, mostly unsuitable for differs. So we kept delaying & delaying. At least now I'm well & truly diffed its limited our options. So we have vouchers for a nice meal in London Town. My Nana also gave us some cash for this Christmas, so that's hotel sorted. We've purposely booked a hotel with a lovely looking pool, so we shall be mostly bobbing around in there.

But first I have to get through the last working day of the week..........

Like you Muse I recognise I'm in a very privileged position of being able to choose if I come back to work. Am planning to take 12 months off, then planning to put in an application to work 3 days. Someone of my grade has already been successful in getting that, so I'm hopeful. Put it this way, if they refuse they'll have a bloody big fight on their hands. Of course, I'm not making any hard & fast rules yet as I don't know how I'll feel once Bug is here. It would obviously be a change in our lifestyle (like having a baybee isn't!) but we could manage on Mr Loz's salary alone. We're just very very lucky to have the option. My mum is also retiring next month (she decided this before I got diffed) & has already offered to look after Bug 2 days a week for me. So all in all I'm one very lucky lady.

Life is pretty good

Just to put the other side of things out there; I LOVE my job with a deep and abiding passion. I've spent my first week of maternity leve checking out local nurseries. I know that things may change when Berwhale is actually here, rather than just kicking me in the ribs on a regular basis, but I fully intend to go back to work full-time. Not for the money - again, we don't actually need my income - but because my job is important to me.

And I don't worry about whether going back to work or staying at home makes one a better mother. Being happy and sane makes one good at parenthood, so whatever it takes to make that happen. My mother worked full-time through most of my childhood and that worked for her, and so I was happy.

NB I was at the birthing centre yesterday and I am officially heading there to give birth, yay! They're sending me for yet another scan just to check the baby's size, as I am HUGE. But both the midwives said that s/he felt absolutely normal-sized. .

Interestingly, there was a sheet of little red stickers on the back of the toilet door, with a note saying that if you're experiencing domestic violence, you should stick one of the dots to your urine sample and the midwife will find a way to discuss your options. I thought this was impressive organisation, even though for horrid reasons.

What a lovely positive post laurie Life IS good! :o I am in the very lucky camp too, although TB isnt a very high earner we are really lucky to have very low out goings and some savings. He has always been uber supportive of me being self employed and is now the same about me being a SAHM for as long as I want to. The only small fly in the ointment is that there are major cut backs going on in his sector (aren't there everywhere!!) but we have decided that should the worst happen then which ever one of us got a job first, then the other would do the caring. And we are both pretty much of the mind that it isn't worth worrying about unless it happens.

muse I don't think you should worry you are betraying feminist principles, the whole point of feminism was to give us choice. Feeling pressure to go back to work before you want to is just as much oppression as being chained to the kitchen sink! Well, thats my admittedly rather uninformed view that allows me to do exactly as i please

Funny tho, I wonder how many of us with be tearing our hair out dying to get back to work after a few months, I think pony said she planned to take a year off and went back sooner just cos she really wanted to get back into it. You just never know! (although think I have mentioned how work shy I am, so I don't think I'll be one of them!)

cross post there drom but thats exactly what I'm talking about! What ever makes YOU happy will make Berwhale happy.

Yey for smashing birth centre and correct size sprog. And yes that sticker business is very subtle and well thought out.

I completely agree that going back to work/not going back to work doesn't make you a better mother. It's nice to be able to make the choice freely though, rather than be forced one way or the other by financial necessity.

If I loved my job right now I would be back like a shot. I love parts of it, but not all of it. Maybe being away from work will make me realise that I do love it and I'll be back without even thinking too much. It's so hard to know at this stage how I'll feel in 6 months/a year. Maybe inspiration will hit in maternity leave and I'll go and do my phd!

Drom that is a very cunning system the centre has in place, I'm impressed. When is your scan? I can't remember if you found out what flavour you're having, but if not are you tempted to do so now? Hope Berwhale is a perfectly normal size.

Tis VERY nice not to be forced by financial necessity. Given how much full-time nursery care costs in my area, there would be a very strong argument for me to give up work if that's how we calculated family money.

Muse We didn't find out the flavour. And yes, have to admit that I'm tempted to ask...luckily, after my "baby's not kicking" flap, I had a routine scan. They're so much less fluffy with the clinical scans - it was very much find and measure bit of baby, right, all's fine, off you pop. I suspect therefore that they wouldn't tell me the sex, even if I asked...

Owwwlliiiieee!! that sounds like a brilliant scan with fantastic results! I'm a-crapping myself with the wait for the blood tests which I get Wednesday...

Gaga how lovely for your friend and lozz it's so nice to hear positive things!

As for the work-SAHM discussion, I went back part-time after no.1 when she was 9 months and it really worked out for me. I love my job but needed a balance. I'm not sure what we'll do when this one turns up but will deal with it when I need to. Luckily Italian maternity is fantastic and I get 5 months full pay plus 6 months on 30% so have lots of time to see whether it's worth it. It's such a personal choice, no-one should feel guilty or superior, whatever they choose. and, just for the record, my daughter absolutely thrives at nursery and cries when it's time to go home

Drom am very impressed with that system for identifying domestic abuse and good news about choosing the birthing centre!

I'm highly intolerant of anyone who isn't like me. All the time.