The PESH deli – how extraorder, we're all in pig

[Muser]

We smacked our ovaries and sent them to Madame Bovary, and now we're in pig. MSDP ends here, just waiting for the MAD lot to join us.

BESH BAYBEES
dontrythisathome, girl born March 25.
Cheggers, twinz girlz, born April
FannyPriceless, boy, born June 8
CurlyCasper, girl, born June 24
CUNextTuesday, boy, born June 29
Skihorse, boy, born 1 July
Carrots, boy, born July
IggyPiggy, girl, born July

UPDIFFED
Cosmosis, the baybee that is never going to come out, due August 22
backinthebox, thinking of inventive uses for courgettes, due September 6
skatergrrrl, the one that overtook the rest, September 1
VAG, lives in De Nile, due 19 September
silversky, the biggest farter, due 18 October (first baybee)
Honeymoo, 3 wees a night, due October 31 (boy)
okiecokie, self-confessed control freak, due November 6
SomethingSuitablyWitty, benelux babe, due November 14
ReginaMonologue, knows when all the sales are, due November 20 (boy)
maswera, jungle hottie - due December 11
PollyPoo, wants to name her baybee after the dog, The New Messiah is due December 25
ChoChoSan "and Lo! The lord did resurrect her petrified womb" due 31 January
CluckyKate, hatching an egg - due February 2
Perfect Dromedary, defied medical science - due February 24
Ginhag, reckless cake-carrier, due 28th Feb
Muser, I threw up behind a tree - due February 27
Medee, finally over the Haribo craving, due March 12
Casserole living on hula hoops - due April 10
MrsFC, joining whether she wants to or not

Oh yes, forgot to say, he was in far too much of a hurry to get out - I had him on the bedroom floor! Hopefully this will pass on for later in life for when I want kids to get shoes on and out of the door. DD takes forever doing this!

Moo glad to hear baby is not the wrong size! Does this really mean the end to cream cakes and wine? Surely not! I too was at St George's today but did not see you,m although I would not expect to see you in the Dragon Children's Centre...

Box welcome back and how does it feel to be on t'other side? I can't believe you had him in the bedroom floor. Hope you did not make a mess . I also hope the undercarriage is ok - hairdryer to dry bits and tea tree oil baths is all I can say...
Congratulations again!

moomoomore great news. Must be relief.

I went to appt today. Dr said all was perfick. Tho to me the hertbeat didn't sound as is normally did but Dr said everything fine. Stupidly I didn't question her. Am seeing MW Fri to do some admin and will ask her about it. Prob all is ok as little person is v wriggly and giving me grief and frequent stabs.

how do you knowz if you haz the bum grapes? Plz to tell. SOMEONE!

Great story Boxy - I am finding stories of quick labours and births tres gratifying at the moment!

Hello boxymum! Fab story of your little 4 hour sneeze! Sorry about your gished bits though.

Silver Vag had issues with Chalfonts. Maybe she can drag herself away from daytime TV and enlighten...

moo glad he is ok, hope the tests go ok tomorrow. You are not a bad mum. Eating sugary stuff doesn't give you gestational diabetes. I know because I googled extensively after deciding to panic a bit about my diet. If you had the risk factors your docs should have tested you, if you didn't then there's no way you could have known.

Am in awe of Boxy's birth story. Quick! So quick! Ignoring the undercarriage bits though. Was it meant to be a homebirth or was it just super fast?

Glad all is OK, moo. Given my Haribo devotion recently, the diabetes thing has me a bit worried, so I am glad to hear it has no link.

Box seriously impressed; oh for a short, whizzy labour!

I has just been to see the lovely Boxy and she def. has the right idea - is loafing around in bed like lady muck whilst her minions wait on her

Am v. v. jealous of her pain-free homebirth too.....am hoping there's one of those still left for me.

Moo sorry to say that the leakage sounds like wee...'tis normal at your stage tho. Time to get some Tena Lady in.....you'll need it for after too . Great news about baby tho.

Cho - didn't feel any kicking with first baby until about 20 weeks (am tall & top-end of right weight). Felt it really early this time tho, around 14 weeks, but was prob because a) was on holiday not doing v. much and b) I knew what it was....you prob have felt it but have with been too busy to notice or have assumed it is normal bowel movement/wind.

Hello

Please may I join you all? I've been doing my research on here and you seem like kindred spirits. AND I recognised the Mitfordness of the title. I think I am definitely a PESH, if I've worked out the acronym right. I was a BESH at heart but didn't realise you were all there.

I am a little bit elderly, spent a while getting to the point where I am now 6 weeks pregnant, and convinced it'll disappear at any moment, so I sit cross legged (while trying not to worry that this is bad for me).

okiedokie I am not sure if I haz them thar grapes or not!

moo I sent Him Indoors out for pantyliners once and became back with Tena Lady!

The mutt is off to the quacks tmw for a physical to rule out the reason for self harming. Majority of people thinks it's all to do with the diffed me.

boxer give your servants hell!

Welcome stiffy! BESH/PESH/FESH all hardcore mares are welcome here as long as you enjoy gin

Well done boxer - impt question - did you win a ginger baybee?

Welcome stiffy - being ancient and ttc forever are fine qualities. Try to leave worrying about inane shit (e.g., carrying cakes, swimming, wearing yellow) to the mad, brainless twats found over in pregnancy so that we can take the piss out of people's neurosis without having to turn on each other. Here in PESHland you are expected to continue exercising, accidentally eat raw mussels and enjoy a dazzling array of stinky cheeses on a weekly basis. Danish blue and thick salty butter was once a standard Deli ms cure. Furthermore, if you find yourself in a Mexican bar with a margerita in both hands - the PESH girls won't judge you. You may even find your baybee enjoys the evening.

There is also a FESH creche further down the line for those who have laid the baybee. Reading should be done at your own discretion given the "real life" stories of laying, poo & bogeys.

Well done silver - rots is a "wine connoisseur".

'Allo, Stiffy. Is P G Wodehouse reference, non? Excellent stuff.

Second antenatal yoga thingy last night annoyed me. Yoga was nice, class was nice, but one of the women said that she had decided with her doctor to book in for an elective caesarean and the teacher put on her giant judgy pants. Grrr. There were sound reasons for said elective, I think - lady is forty, not amazingly fit, having quite a big baby (her bump is enormo and she's 7 months). And anyway, if you want to have a caesarean, that is your choice and you should be supported, not made to feel inferior or cowardly.

Bloody hippy tyranny. I don't understand why birth is forced on you either way - there's no-one who will help you make a properly informed decision. Midwives are all "women have been giving birth for thousands of years" without mentioning the fact that birth has been fucking dangerous for thousands of years. The medical profession are all a HOMEBIRTH. Well, you will surely have a four-headed child, then. Can someone just give me some facts so I can make up my own bastard mind? Thanking you.

moo! So glad the scan was reassuring. Nice normal-sized head is the main thing that you want to see . I had the diabetes test a few weeks ago (I think they do it as standard here). That drink they give you before the blood test is truely gross. I was told I could eat a normal breakfast that morning, but to avoid very sweet things as they would skew the test. A friend of mine had a breakfast of chocolate croissant washed down with chocolate milk before her test (she wasn't thinking) and indeed got a worryingly high score, so tea and toast probably the way to go! It's good that they are picking up on it and if it is diabetes, it will probably just mean a few weeks of controlled diet and all will be well!

stiffy old thing! Any Wodehouse fan is welcome as far as I am concerned! How are you feeling? Nausea and a weak desire for fizzy sweets?

Boxy you will be pointing out that spot on the bedroom floor for years to come. Sorry about undercarriage carnage though. Ouchy ouch. How are you feeling now? Sounds like it has been well taken care of, poor thing.

Cho I felt baby fairly early at 17 weeks, but could not call it moves or flutters. Felt like tiny bubbles of air bursting and way lower down than I would have thought - in the general region of public bone. Within days boyfy could feel it on the outside too - but nobody else, as feeling it involved hand in knickers . You are right though, placenta location does make a difference, so could be another while yet. All normal!

X-post with drom...

That is awful and one of the things I like about my midwives is that they absolutely do not foist any ideas onto you about how your birth "should" be. Obviously to do so is desperately unfair.

Only thing I can say though, is a pre-natal yoga teacher is pretty much wearing her credentials on her sleeve. She probably passionately believes that ELCS is not the right choice (even if that is not helpful) and probably feels she has to convery that to those in her class...

Must have been upsetting though - especially for the poor woman concerned, who probably doesn't even feel like coming back now - which would be the worst outcome really.

Cho I didn;t feel first til about 21 weeks and second was the same. In fact I only really felt regular movements around 25 weeks so plz not to worry.

Drom I also went to hippy yoga last night. Don't think it was same class though. It was a bit too hippyish for me. Lighted candles and "spa" music. I find it hard to let go of my inhibitions - was instructed to keep eyes shut but couldn' see what I was supopsed to be doing - I felt a bit of a nob to be fair And fuck me re the judgey pants yoga teacher. Surely we all agree that getting baybee out safe and well tis the best method whichever method that may be. I had first NCT refresher class yesterday too (starting to take this pregnancy seriously with my yoga and nct fest yesterday) and nct teacher is clearly very pro home birth - which is fine for some. I can't have a home birth (and would not want one unless it was like box's) and I almost wanted to have a stand up row with her - not good for the first class. In fact I can have an elective c-section if I want but the main thing stopping me is not being able to drive or carrying mini Okie for 5 weeks.

Stiffler welcome! Don't you realize that it is a bit late to keep your legs crossed - clearly not doing so got you into this mess in the first place! If you want to keep the baybee in then don't go swimming as that clearly washes the baybee away..

I'm pretty sure I'm going for an ELCS this time, after a failed homebirth, emergency transfer, EMCS, major PPH and tranfusions last time (fuck me that's a lot of acronyms)

Anyone who tries to make me feel bad about that choice in weeks to come will receive the full extent of my wrath and, in fact, I'd almost welcome it to happen in front of other pregnant women so they don't feel bad for their choices, too.

We make the best choices we can. Anyone who judges can Fuck Right Off.

Welcome Stiffy

Gosh, poor cass - that sounds very very tough. And I have heard Okie's story before as well. You are absolutely right of course to choose the best and safest option for you. It is awful to think someone would publicly question a difficult and absolutely personal decision.

okie I am confounded by the thought of a yoga class with lighted candles - where everyone has their eyes closed... Is that not an accident waiting to happen?!. I liked the class I went to, but felt the teacher should not simply have accepted any person who turned up regardless of the space available. There were way too many of us in that room. Thought it was rather mercenary and not very yogic of her. I will be starting a new class this week, as the old one required a 25 minute walk, which I am not allowed to do anymore. Hope it will be better. Tis fixed numbers anyway, so sounds like a good start...

I want an ELCS next time. I also fucking hate cunting yoga teachers. Tbh, only went to one yoga class (and got diffed that night and it fell out), but the hippy shite made me bilious. I also don't like spas or facials or massages or any of that shite. I don't see what a yoga teacher's opinion has to do with anything... your ob/gyn consultant yes, some twat who once spent 6 months travelling around India with a bunch of trustafarians and lonely planet can kiss my arse.

Muser I am so sorry. I think the GP appt is the right way to go.

Thanks Witty for the kind thoughts. It was hard, but ok. Prob not as bad as it sounds written out quickly like that. I didn't mean it to sound "poor Cass", anyway. I feel fine about an ELCS this time, in fact it sounds quite civilised! But I hate it when women are bullied about their choices.

I'd still love to have given birth at home. In theory at least. But I don't think it's ever going to happen now, and that's ok. In the grand scheme of things, the getting them out is such a tiny part of the bigger picture. It's all the days after that that count, really.

Ta muchly for the many welcomes. I'm trying very hard to sit on the neuroses and this place is a lot more helpful than many of the mad places on the internet - scary crap in a lot of places.

Is the yoga teacher the sort of thing to expect when preggers? IE opinions given freely and firmly by all and sundry?

muser I think we know each other from elsewhere - I can't contact you on here it seems but if you get in touch, I can explain. I am quite feminist in other circles... I hope the GP can sort this out - throwing up blood must be really distressing.

EVERYONE'S got an opinion when you're diffed Stiffler. I got to the point where I started saying "Does my face look like I'm listening? Because I can assure you I'm not"to a particularly annoying woman at work!!

Oh God Muse - I am feeling a bit queasy myself at the thought of puking up swallowed blood. Definitely to the doctors with you. This cannot go on.

Question for you peeps (sorry for the gross detail coming up, but if muse can puke up her own blood, I can have diarrhoea dammit).
Anyway, I have had it on and off for about three days. Not dreadful, but not the best. Now feeling a bit scared that maybe it's another premature labour sign, after the whole cervix scare earlier in the week. Should I ignore (this is my preferred option TBH, but wondering if it is stupid)or should I call someone and try and get some sort of opinion on it...Whaddya think?

I'm feeling bad about my earlier post now in case (a) have freaked out any first timers and (b) it sounded like I was ranting towards you lovely ladies.

On point (a) - it really wasn't as bad as it probably sounds. And I would still encourage anyone to try for a homebirth, or a VBAC, or an HBAC for that matter. I think I just got unlucky, tis all. Pliz not to be freaked out. I didn't mean to be one of those horror story teller type people. Cos it wasn't, truly. Just all went a bit Pete Tong towards the end.

On point (b) I just felt so cross for the poor woman Drom mentioned. In real life I'd probably slink off and cry in the toilets I think anyone trying to a VBAC is brave and courageous and probably much more sensible and reasoned and thoughtful than me, who is a big wuss. So there.