The PESH Deli; Won't somebody think of the children???????

[Cosmosis]

THE NOT LIST

BESH BAYBEES
dontrythisathome, girl born March 25.
Cheggers, twinz girlz, born April
FannyPriceless, boy, born June 8
CurlyCasper, girl, born June 24
CUNextTuesday, boy, born June 29
Skihorse, boy, born 1 July
Carrots, boy, born July
IggyPiggy, girl, born July

UPDIFFED
Cosmosis, the one that likes a good ride, due August 22
backinthebox, thinking of inventive uses for courgettes, due September 6
skatergrrrl, the one that overtook the rest, September 1
VAG, lives in De Nile, due 19 September
silversky, the biggest farter, due 18 October (first baybee)
Honeymoo, 3 wees a night, due October 31 (boy)
okiecokie, self-confessed control freak, due November 6
SomethingSuitablyWitty, benelux babe, due November 14
ReginaMonologue, knows when all the sales are, due November 20 (boy)
maswera, jungle hottie - due December 11
PollyPoo, wants to name her baybee after the dog, The New Messiah is due December 25

lol.

Hey all - thanks for the support re the evil grape(s?) Rots you talk much sense - I think you actually told me to get it/them sorted when I suspected they were lurking a few months ago. I'll try to gird myself up to seeing a GP tomorrow - gawd if I feel like this about having my bum poked by a medic, how am I going to cope with childbirth? Am quite grateful TSF is away for a few days so I can try to cope with this on my own and not have to tell him (right now at least). And just before the Pop Of Doom I ate a very huge, unhealthy club sandwich and chips

Swit nice to see you back and bronzed! Thanks for christening suggestion - will look into it. Suspect older sibling may also want in on something that fun though.

welcome back Witty.

VAG sorry bout the bum grapes lovely. Sounds like carrots has given you good advice so hope the doc sorts you/them out quickly.

Hello bronzedandlovelywitty!

I had first midwife appt today (am 11 weeks.) Have to have consultant care due to the em cs and all the fucking about they had to do after the mmc. Am not allowed in the birthing suite place :(

I am allowed to stamp my feet for a home birth but although the risk of rupture is small it's still a risk, and one with potentially horrific consequences.... And I have been trying to read up on vbac but just had a load of horror stories :(

Should've got them to put a zip in last time....

ski witters Baby shower was totally unexpected and not a Brit thing. SIL is just generally very thoughtful. It's the only shower I have ever been to and prob the last. There is no way I would send out a list of wanted items. Seems wrong in my eyes.

In terms of goodies we are brownies, apple pie, fruit cake with marzipan plus loads of other bad stuff!

Baybee now has full compliment of vests and babygros and has one of those hoodie towels. So can dry junior if we decide to ever bath him or her.

vag soz about the butt grapes.

I have neck ache to accompany my back ache. I am truly crook.

Someone at work I implied that I am rather large!!!!!! . Ok so I am all tittage and bummage with a good bump developing but to imply I am already huge is rude dude rude. We won't mention the raised eyebrows and knowing look of "you are gonna be so MASSIVE" when I say I am actually not that big and still have ten weeks to go.

witty I know someone who carried a cake once...SHE DIED!!!!

Oooh just spotted news of silver's shower! Lovely! I had the same just a couple of weeks before the birth. It's not the done thing around here as far as I am aware and if I attend any more it will probably be to return the favour if any of my master surprisers ever have a baby (long way off!). People are so generous, aren't they. I still can't get over the number of cards and gifts stacking up in the house. And my mum tells me she has more to bring this week.

I've got a mountain of thank you cards to write, but every time I sit down to do them, a certain little madam decides to shout in my ear

Loads of birthdays round here at the moment, so I have decided to carry a cake in to the deli (there should be a special GIANT CAKE counter), which is safe now that I have a six week old baby instead of a bump. I have used lots of booze to bake it. And it is best served with a nice glass of red. I'm only thinking of the children mummies

sorry about the bum grapes vag. welcome to the club.,

pol i addressed the dog in bug ishoo on FESH. I have a soft, new bath mat thingy on living room floor (just looks like a circle rug) which we use for changing baby. Mutley like to wait till we've finished and lie on it, even though less than a third of her body fits. She does the same with any towels etc the baby has been on if left on floor and I am just waiting for her to have a go in the baby gym...

gin please persevere if you can, and if you think its feasible. After getting to 34/5 weeks and not knowing why the hell I was under consultant care any more (all perceived risks addressed and dismissed) I got a MW to get a consultant to review my notes and they agreed to a MW-led water birth, as long as I was 37 weeks or over, of course. That was on the Monday at 35+5. Squeaks was born on the Thursday at 36+1. The little bugger - so consultant led it was. Booooooo! well, at least I had my personal, little victory for comfort.

right, I said I was out of here on FESH and this baby really won't put herself to bed...

Woke up for comfort break 40 odd mins ago and am now wide awake. Great.

Not only will I have to contend with colleagues thinking I am a chunky preggo monkey, I will now also have to disguise the luggage under my eyes too.

Won't someone think of the insomniacs???

Meh - had you poked a stick silver you'd have hit any number of Fesh's at that hour.

gin I daren't read the VBAC threads - I fear they'd be worse than Medee's footling breech. :( For my next, I'll go back to same mw for gestational care but I imagine I'll be up at the hospital for a zip.

It's worse when you google it ski. I advise not to, not ever, not under any circumstances. Zips are the way forward.

Thanks casp too...am not convinced it'll change as whatever happens I will still have the scar. It seems there are certain risks they don't want in the birthing centres and that's one of them. Am fairly sure it's more to do with their statistics than anything else... But anyway, have decided to stick my head back in the sand for a bit. Am not discussing anything with consultant til 20 weeks so will see what they have to say. I have concluded I am not going for home vbac although I thought I would after I had moo...it's something I would have to fight for and I'm not sure that it's even what I want!

Still, at least I only carried 4 bags of shopping for the 2 mile walk home last night and not.... A CAKE!

Gin I had a rather messy CS with complications and, well, just a bit of a mess really. I have paid for the services of and independent midwife this time, which I realise costs a bit but figure mine and the baby's health and happiness was worth it. I've had to change midwife part way through, but the first one said it really makes a difference which consultant I was sent to see, and she only thought it was worth going to see a consultant if I wanted to. She said if I really wanted a VBAC she would send me to one lady, and if I really wanted another section she would send me to a particular male consultant. If you are NHS it is luck of the draw who you get - whoever has the next free slot. Yet you can chose your consultant, it is just many NHS community midwives don't know enough about them to give you good advice.

When I went to see my consultant I wanted to get a few ground rules from my side sorted out - no CFM, no canula, etc. I went into see the lady and she was very laid back and has actually referred me on to a hospital midwife for a midwife led birth with use of the birth pool and 'homely suites.'

So, while to some I would be high risk, to this particular consultant I am OK to have a normal birth as far as she is concerned. You are very early days yet so I would do a bit of poking around and see what you can find out about your local hospitals and consultants before you get resigned to VBACS all being doom and gloom. Of course I am saying all of this from the 'before' stage of the actual process itself - check back with me next month to see if it all went wrong again!

I wouldn't go for a home VBAC either unless I had already had one successful one in hospital. I live miles from the hospital and in a fairly difficult to find place. I think even a 999 call with blue lights would take nearly an hour from calling them to arriving at hospital and that's just not good enough for me.

Right everyone STOP trying to scare Artie out until after Friday please. TGO came up trumps wiv birfday pressie of super posh spa day to happen on Friday (which sadly means have had to cancel fanny meetup :( ) but am vv looking forward to it and will be v cross if I can't go.

Thanks for the tan compliments - never happens in real life!

Were you all too horrified by notion of a baby list to even react to it? Except silver - who confimed my fears... I had a look at my most recently received birth annoncement cards last night (there have been tonnes recently) and they all contain a link to a baby list and ...an account number! There is something clinical about these Belgians! I expect boyfy will want to do it, seeing as he has bought so many things off baby lists in his time, but I am not sure I could ever bring myself to send such a thing to my friends and family. Dilemmas, dilemmas.

Ginny - I know little about how care is organised in the UK really, but the kind of scenario boxy and curly describe, with a midwife led birth in a hospital setting might be ideal for a VBAC? That is what I am planning on myself and feeling very positive about it.

Vag - hope you find something you like for the christening present. I thought the footprint thing was cute and though it was a bit of hassle taking the baby to get it done (which did not involve me of course)I think bro and SIL really like it too. How are the grapes of wrath today?

curly all this loose talk of cake carrying - didn't you listen to Cho's salutary tale of cake and mortality?

Sit tight artie! You'll be fine cos - just please don't eat pineapple or, you know, walk, between now and then...

I have never heard of a baby list, but if it's tradition there and he is willing to do it, get him to do it

Ohh and can I do a symptom question to honey, okie, silver and reggie and other date sistahs - are you guys having Braxton Hicks yet? I am getting this tight, hard feeling across my stomach, especially when I do something crazy, like walk up a flight of stairs... Is that what it is? Normal, right?

And: another rather shameful symtom - loads of my attractive shapeless cotton maternity bras are making my boobs unbearably itchy, especially underneath, but kind of all over. The only sort of bearable wear is an old lycra sports bra. It is way worse when it's hot, so I guess it is is some charming way related to sweatiness... I had to go bra-less a few times on hols (it was dazzling, especially in those chilly Spanish cathedrals...) and is generally very annoying. Any ideas what it is or what to do? BTW - I bought a couple of brand new bras while away and threw away some of the old ones, but this did not help... though it was an interesting language exercise.

Switty - normal.

Also I have abandonned bras unless I am leaving the house. I am living in Next 'hidden support' vests and preggo tracksuit bottoms. The support is so well hidden I haven't found it yet. Am resigned to having boobs by my knees for the rest of my life but at least they are comfy right night .

Babylists? I know what my friends and relatives would do if I presented them with a babylist! But I suppose if it is the cultural norm and your Belgian friends are expecting it, then go with the flow. Frankly I have too much other stuff to do to even think about writing my friends a list of things to buy for me - they can think of stuff to buy for the baybee themselves and save me the job. I like choosing things for other peoples babies anyway. When people buy you presents they have thought of you get things you might never have thought of yourself.

PS have noticed Reg has gone AWOL again.

Gin I think you're right not to worry until 20 weeks. You could drive yourself nuts with the hoo ha about it. I'm sure you don't have to have a zip if you don't want surely? They can't force you. but I guess it's what's going to give you the most peace of mind?

Witty glad you had lovely hollibobs. Very amusing that you were wondering around braless. I think I'd get arrested if that were to happen. I do get some itching underneath now that the bump is getting much higher and wider (from 34 to 40 inch!!!), but to be honest, I suspect you could probably get a better fitting bra that isn't just gripping you from round the rib cage if you see what I mean. My new wired ones are very comfy indeed, but can get a tiny bit itchy underneath if I don't adjust them right. I fink we are doomed to suffer from here on in though.

Also not sure on the BH. I haven't felt any specific tightenings, but sometimes the bump is definitely harder and tighter... not sure to be honest. I think it is normal though from this point.

I was in so much pain with the front pelvis last night I couldn't actually walk. The stretching exercises help massively though so might have to do some at lunchtime today so it doesn't get as bad. Move over Jane Fonda.

Should I have my office chair tilted slightly forwards so that my back pelvis is higher than the front? Isn't that the advice? It's feeling a bit odd, but if I have it like normal my bum and back go numb and stiff.

God honey, that pelvic pain sounds awful! You poor thing. I was looking at my pregnancy book last night and it recommended two types of stretches: the one where you are on all fours and arch and relax your back and the one where you sit back from this position onto your legs and leave your arms stretched out in front of you. Obviously these are back stretches, but I presume the pain is linked to your back and bump carrying generally. If you find adjusting your chair stops you going numb and stiff I would say do it, definitely! silver may have moer advice, as she's been having bad back pain...

You have a point on the bra fit too honey but I did get the new ones properly fitted and got them fairly loose around the rib cage, so I guess that wasn't enough. I'm glad to know boxy is in the same boat and I had a good snigger at the hidden support ...

Thanks for the list views too - it's hard to know. My own feeling is that it would indeed be less hassle to let people pick for themselves, as boxy says - as anyway, what we really need we'll have to buy in advance. Well, I'll see with boyfy...It may be seen as inconsiderate here to force people to actually go to a shop for you. Dunno, dunno.

switty Maybe you should just go with it - for your Belgian friends & family at least. The Belgies are rather mercenary with their "money please" wedding list - so why not go with this? Let your expat friends do as they please - but maybe subtly suggest they buy something from UK/IE rather than duplicating Belgian stuff. :)

Just have to share this conversation with someone.

OH; We need to get DD's hair cut.
Me; Why?
OH; because it's knotty and lost it's bouncy curls.
Me; well, have you washed and brushed it recently?
OH; No - will that make a difference?

DD does not like to have her hair washed in the bath. OH has always done bathtime as he couldn't breastfeed her (obviously!) and wanted a job that was 'his.' So bathtime and bedtime it is then. However, he does not do washing of hair in the bath - bathtime is far too much fun for actual washing to be allowed to interfere! There is always much shrieking, laughing, splashing and water on the floor - every night. I have a shower in the morning and wash DD's hair then when it needs doing, and showers are a much more sober affair. Recently there has not been enough room in the shower for both DD and me - no idea why . So OH has taken over the showering duties too. Cue much shrieking, laughing, splashing and water on the floor - you get the picture! But not much actual washing going on. So DD has been getting out of the shower very entertained but with hair that resembles a sodden bird's nest all knotted up. She has lovely hair - but I will confess it has been getting a bit frizzy recently. It was only a bit or a closer quizzing of OH that revealed he thinks that conditioner and hairbrushes are overrated things when you are as wild and free a spririt as DD and he are! Of course, he is practically bald.....

Anyway. I quick re-education, and it seems DD is saved from the scissors, and her hair will be conditioned and brushed back to it's full ginger curly loveliness.

We took her out to a steam engine day yesterday, and I have a little old fashioned smock dress that she wore with her favourite straw hat. She looked all pretty and dainty (if you could ignore the bellows of 'I want to go on THAT train!') and very much like a little girl should look like. Bless. She's back in dungarees today

Mmmmm ski - got to agree that the Belgians are not too subtle with their lists. Mad, mad. One system for the belgians and one for the nons might indeed be the way to go. Maybe we could do an insert to include only with the Belgian cards or something like that ...

BTW ski I have just dipped my toe into the administrative mire that you have been attempting to wade through to register baby bear. Yup, turns out that I too will need to get a certificat de celibat and certificat de coutume (WTF?) before we can recognise the baby. Which we must do before the state will open its coffers for us. Always good fun skipping through the fields of red tape, eh?

Awww - you know I used to hate getting my hair washed when I was a baby. To such an extent that my parents just stopped washing it. Drastic measures... Your DD has beautiful hair - glad it's been restored to its full glory!

switty I applied for family allowance very smoothly a few weeks ago. Lo and behold I received a detailed survey in the post last week because I've thrown them by skipping across the border back and forth for the last 10 years. I've also just had to stick in the post a copy of my rental contract! You'd have thought paying taxes here since 2000 might've been enough...

I need to phone the consulate today actually - I'd put this all on the back burner but it needs to be done. :( Ugh. My baby don't have no daddy.

I might send an anonymous note to your gemeente claiming to be your WIFE!