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Original poster

DH died today and I don’t know what to do

523 replies

Pleasedontdothat · 31/10/2023 18:26

He’d just turned 57 and was really fit but he’d been feeling vaguely under the weather for the last few days. I ended up taking him to a&e this morning as he had severe abdominal pain overnight but all his blood tests etc came back normal and they sent him home with instructions to see the GP. He went upstairs to have a lie down then said he was having a shower. I was downstairs on work calls. A couple of hours later I went upstairs to see if he wanted something for lunch and realised the shower was still running. I called out but no answer so went into the bathroom to find him collapsed on the floor - he was obviously dead. I don’t know how I’m going to cope . No point in this post but in some ways it’s easier than telling wider family and friends

OP posts:
Dragonsandcats · 31/10/2023 18:34

I’m so very sorry for your loss. i hope you have someone with you- let them tell people. we’re all here if you want to talk.

TheShellBeach · 31/10/2023 18:34

How far away is your family?
Do they know?

winewolfhowls · 31/10/2023 18:34

I'm so sorry to hear this, I just can't imagine how awful this must have been for you. I hope you have some real life support.

RubyBoozeDay · 31/10/2023 18:36

You need people around you in real life. Tell friends and family, let them come and support you.
You have my deepest sympathies.

HermioneN · 31/10/2023 18:36

So, so sorry, much love x

Bideshi · 31/10/2023 18:36

Happened to me 7 years ago. I still get flashbacks even though I've made a new life for myself. I was lucky (!) in that my very kind GP came and signed it off as a heart attack so I was spared an inquest. Get somebody with you because the next few days will be bloody hard. I'm so sorry for you - it's an awful awful thing and not fair.

Iheartmysmart · 31/10/2023 18:37

Oh bloody hell OP, what a dreadful shock for you. I am so, so sorry for your loss 💐

RubyRubyRubyRubay · 31/10/2023 18:37

I don't know what to say, it's completely shocking.

Sending you strength and virtual hugs

FlowersFlowersFlowers

Brefugee · 31/10/2023 18:38

I'm very sorry for your loss, OP. Do you have someone who can be with you at the moment?

LulooLemon · 31/10/2023 18:38

So sorry to hear this OP. Please tell your family and friends so they can support you. x

NameChangedForThis195206644 · 31/10/2023 18:39

So sorry OP, sending love 💐

Georgieporgie29 · 31/10/2023 18:39

Oh my goodness I’m so sorry for your loss op 💐 such a terrible shock for you. I hope you have someone with you now?

Resilience · 31/10/2023 18:40

I'm so so sorry for your loss.

I hope you have loved ones who can support you in real life. 💐

Tanfastic · 31/10/2023 18:40

O my goodness how awful. So so sorry op, what a shock for you. I'm not sure what else to say. I hope you have some support.

TheSpikySpinosaurus · 31/10/2023 18:40

I'm so sorry to hear this. Sending you a huge hug.

What a terrible shock. Do you have RL support?

💐

Gazelda · 31/10/2023 18:40

I'm so sorry for your loss OP. I can imagine you're in shock.

Just try to think of one thing at a time.

Please call someone OP. Who would know how to support you right now? A sister, friend, colleague?

If someone I care about called me right now and said 'help me', I'd be round in a shot.

flapjackfairy · 31/10/2023 18:41

So very sorry to read this . What a terrible shock for you ! Sending deepest condolences x

Ylvamoon · 31/10/2023 18:41

💐 so sorry for your loss.

I hope someone is with you, holding your hand and guiding you through this difficult time.

PickledPurplePickle · 31/10/2023 18:41

Oh gosh I am so sorry x

Motnight · 31/10/2023 18:42

I am so sorry, Op 💐

Dacadactyl · 31/10/2023 18:42

Im very sorry to hear this. Let someone else know and ask them to tell other people on your behalf if youre not up to it.

Also (and this is practical advice, so I appreciate it is very early to be thinking about it, so I dont mean it to come across unsympathetically), but you may be able to claim a Bereavement Support Payment. I am only mentioning this in case your financial situation is difficult.

Oleaginus · 31/10/2023 18:43

I am so very sorry for your loss. I hope you have someone with you now.💐

LatteLady · 31/10/2023 18:43

Dear OP, I am so sorry to read your sad news. Death is never easy to deal with, especially when it is so sudden. Just as a practical piece of advice, can I suggest that you set up a WhatsApp Group or a Facebook group for friends and family. It will make it much easier for sharing updates and will be so much easier on you than having to constantly repeat yourself and everyone will get the same msg. My sincerest condolences.

ThirtyThrillionThreeTrees · 31/10/2023 18:43

I'm so sorry that your DH died, so young and so expectedly too.

Do you have anyone with you? If you are struggling to put it into words and call someone the paramedics or your GP will do it for you. Or text someone and tell them to come round.

Talk about him here if it helps.

SlashBeef · 31/10/2023 18:43

Oh I'm so so sorry. You must be in complete shock. Do you have anyone with you?

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