Support thread for anyone who has lost a parent ( 5 )

[mummylin2495]

Here we are , our new home

It sounds gross badvoc. Did you have an X-ray . Is this still do do with your gall stone / bladder problem

Yes. They make you drink all this stuff and then tilt you up and down on a Table! Bluergh.
Still feel crappy this morning.

I'm not surprised it sounds horrible. Hope you feel better as the day goes on, when will you get some results ?

I go back to the gp on 20th so hopefully no news is good news...
Well, today has been utterly pants!
Aibu to go upstairs to "rest" when dh gets in?
Sis hasn't been to see mum again today :(
So...today I have...
Taken mum to shops
Taken her to cemetery to do dads flowers (hyacinths, tulips and narcissus....gorgeous)
Spent over an hour on phone to HMRC to sort out a cock up with one of dads pensions annuities.
45 mile round trip to take her to see my aunt at the hospice (at least I didn't get lost this time)
Left the house @ 8.30 and didn't get back til 1.30!
Then school run for ds2 and then I was late getting back for ds1 because a bus had broken down across the traffic lights at the major junction of the village
Argh....

Oh my god you have had a busy day. I find it annoying if my dh comes home during the day ! I then can't get anything done because he is just here I like my own space. Feeling bit edgy today about my mum for some reason , not a special date or anything. When will this hole in my heart heal ?

Oh Lin :( I wish I knew. When you say edgy, what do you mean? Upset? Angry? Melancholy?
It will be 7 months tomorrow since dad died.
And I am pretty sure my siblings won't even remember :(

....7 months since my first post on this wonderful thread and 7 months since you took the time and kindness to reply.
Thank you Lin x

I think it's just a mixture of things today really. My mind went back to the last time I saw her so I went over it all once again. It disturbed me a bit. But after reading about Minmooch,s loss today I have pulled myself together a bit. I am lucky my son is sat here right now. What terrible pain she must be in, I could cry for her. I saw your post but had already posted myself on the other thread.
7 months already, I can hardly believe it. Where has all that time gone ?

Oh, I know :( I simply cannot (or at least my brain will not let me) imagine what min and her family must be going through.
As awful as dads loss was (and is) We can look back on 67 years of a happy and useful life. I have spent a bit of time in hospices lately, and I now know - absolutely know - that there are worse things than a quick death.
Thinking of you x

It'll be 5 months since I lost Granddad on Friday. I had a wee cry at Slimming World today, they're doing a big 6 week push and a few of us have set personal challenges. I said at the end of it, I'd like to do something in memory of him, as it was him who stood up to my mum for me - she was very against me going at first, but she's totally converted now.

It was just a bit too much to say and I shed a few tears. The Reverend who conducted his funeral service holds a coffee morning on a Friday - I've got to go to the job centre this week, in the same town, so might call in before I go there.

Hello ladies. I've been thinking of minmooch a lot this evening. Unimaginably devastating. Like you Badvoc, I am thankful for my parents' relatively long and very busy, happy lives.

Badvoc the barium meal sounds awful- hope you've recovered from it now! Sounds like you've had a really manic day today.

mummy I'm so sorry to hear that today has brought difficult feelings for you. Grief is so unpredictable, isn't it? And often there's no rhyme or reason as to why it hits on one day and not another. I'm sorry to say that I don't know if the hole in your heart will ever heal, I don't think mine will. My friend shared a lovely analogy with me, I'll see if I can find it.

Hoping you are all doing ok today. The weather seems to match my feelings, one minute bright and sunny the next it's pouring down and dark and miserable. I wish peace fr all f you especially the newest posters who are newly bereaved. Look after yourselves.

my god lin i couldn't have put it better! Mothers day is hanging over my horrendously this year, i hate the thought of it.
so i know what you mean. I'm here if you want a chat.
sorry not been around, when i work its crazy busy i really find it hard to catch back up. I've been given another month yay!! xx
Anyone who has joined the group so very sorry for your loss, we are here for you to talk to the beginning of the losing someone is horrendous its beyond sad. If you really struggle CRUSE generic help line helped me at times. Hugs to you x

Badvoc - hows the situation with DS? Hope better
hi waterlego, ssd, biscuits, super, fod, mouse, imnot, cat and anyone else on the thread thinking of you all xx

can i ask if anyone has read any books on bereavement they found good, in relation to the selfishness and callousness of others? not that i will ever understand how family haven't ever even asked me how i feel or even talk about my mum..its like she never existed but then they went to the funeral! wtf!

anyways thinking of you all xx

T - I found "you'll get over it - the rage of bereavement" by Virginia ironside very good.
I would send it to you, by its on my kindle.
It covers the feelings of anger and bewilderment that lots of use feel when people assume we are now fine.
Got a difficult day with mum tomorrow...she asked me to arrange some gardeners to come and look at the garden as she needs some landscaping done....except now she is says she doesn't know what she wants! Wish me strength!! (Might send dh)

Thanks badvoc for that, ill look into it. Good luck for your mum with the gardening!!

How is DS doing now hun?? x

I'm not really sure tbh :(
He is still coughing...but we have an appt with his paed in 6 weeks so am hoping I can wait til them to see a dr. I think it may be his asthma causing the coughing.
Sigh.

How is the school situation Badvoc that's what i meant hun? Been thinking of him x

Hope his cough gets better, there was a really good medicine i got prescribed for dd when she had that, i can let you know the number if you want x

Not sure about that either :(
His teacher says he was fine today. Dh and I have decided we will give it til Easter and then re evaluate the situation.

Dr gave him codeine linctus last time we were there which seems to help a bit.

hi girls, I still have no pc, so am at the library for a quick catch up, am missing chatting to you all

its funny how much we rely on the internet now, thanks god for it!

xx for you all

Hi ssd good to hear from you. How much longer will you be without the net ? Hope you are doing ok and that you can soon get back in cyber land ! Take care

Hi ssd :)

sorry I've not been back how are you all? have had an awful day today the mother's day emails and stuff popping up in shops has set off an incredibly low and fed up mood. my friends partner has been messing around behind her back and I'm trying to help her but want to shake him, why do people who have eveuthing just fuck it up for stupid reasons!

Oh ssd will look forward very soon to you coming back miss you!!

Yeah im with you on the low super - at my mum and dads again today and sorting out HER memory stuff and that was actually killing, all the personal affects and the special little things she loved, but on the flip side i took some home..honestly the stuff I have moved on is crazy! Did get some great bits though after my eldest asking for scissors in the week saying she hasn't got any as hers broke at school, we found LOADS of pairs of scissors today! Oh and felt tips which my youngest was asking me for..its like they continue to sort out from above I swear!!! Thanks Super

Hope ds is better soon badvoc and you get to the bottom of whats wrong.
lin - Thinking of you too and thanks
least we have had a let up from the horrible winds and rain went looking for hoovers today and cant decide, i know random..but what is your hoover? lol i like to go by reccomendations

love to all xx