Please or to access all these features

Bereavement

Find bereavement help and support from other Mumsnetters. See also your choices after baby loss.

Love, like starlight, never dies... Our precious children sparkling in the sky xx

984 replies

CazandBelle · 28/06/2011 11:13

"Small was feeling grim and dark. He was playing toss and fling and bang and crash. Break and snap and bash and batter. Small said ?I?m a grim and grumpy little small and nobody loves me at all?. ?Oh Small,? said Large. ?Grumpy or not, I?ll always love you no matter what.?

Small said, ?If I was a grizzly bear would you still love me would you still care?? ?Of course,? said Large ?bear or not, I?ll always love you no matter what.?

Small said ?But if I turned into a bug, would you still love me and give me a hug?? ?Of course,? said Large ?bug or not, I?ll always love you no matter what.?

?No matter what?? said Small, and smiled, ?What if I was a crocodile?? Large said ?I?d hug you close and hold you tight and tuck you up in bed at night?.
?Does love wear out? said Small, ?does it break or bend? Can you fix it, stick it, does it mend?? ?Oh help,? said Large ?I?m not that clever I just know I?ll love you forever?.

Small said ?but what about when you?re dead and gone, would you love me then, does love go on?? Large held Small snug as they looked out at the night, at the moon in the dark and the stars shining bright.

?Small look at the stars ? how they shine and glow, but some of those stars died a long time ago. Still they shine in the evening skies. Love, like starlight, never dies?.

NO MATTER WHAT by Debi Gliori

Missing my beautiful Belle, a year to the day we placed her to bed in her garden. Mummy and Daddy love you, always. To the moon and back xxx

OP posts:
shabbapinkfrog · 18/09/2011 07:45

Good morning girls xx

CheeseandGherkins · 18/09/2011 12:41

Afternoon x

bobble congratulations! Lovely name :)

Mini just a week to go, wow! Are you being induced or is that when your due date is?

caz hope you're all ok today, keeping you in my thoughts and sending love and strength xx

Minione · 18/09/2011 13:03

I'm being induced on my due date! I'm hoping things will get moving before hand, I cant wait any longer!

Hope everything is ok Caz xx

shabbapinkfrog · 19/09/2011 07:26

Morning girls xx

Bluetinkerbell · 19/09/2011 10:38

morning! just as I was about to get up and tidy up this extremely messy living room... toys everywhere, our cat settled down on my lap! guess I will have to stay put a bit longer Wink

shabbapinkfrog · 20/09/2011 06:44

Morning girls xx

shabbapinkfrog · 20/09/2011 22:53

Very quiet here girls - hope Caz is OK.

My husband is off to Germany on Friday afternoon just until Sunday night. His younger brother (about 44 years old) is Ex Army but now lives in Germany, fit as a fiddle, doesn't drink or smoke, has had a pacemaker fitted. He is out of hospital now but doesn't have any family there. My DH is going with his sister to make sure their little brother is OK. Will be the first time (except for when I had the children) in 34 years that he has been away without me. Quite looking forward to a bit of peace and quiet Wink

shabbapinkfrog · 21/09/2011 06:44

Morning girls xx

lavandes · 21/09/2011 06:51

Morning ladies xx

Enjoy your peace and quiet shabs x

I have been wondering how caz is I read her blog. We are all thinking of you caz xx

Bluetinkerbell · 21/09/2011 09:41

lavandes Caz is still in hospital! all is well, but they're monitoring her very closely. She will be induced in 3 weeks if all stays like it is.

I'm feeling extremely tired, throat hurts. I woke up this morning, sent DH to the shower and fell back asleep again. Think I'm fighting off flu :(

shabbapinkfrog · 21/09/2011 09:57

Hang on in there Caz and your precious boy. I know you can both do it - I have every faith in both of you xxxxxx

frasersmummy · 21/09/2011 21:55

Caz has been in my thoughts and prayers ...

I am glad all is "ok for now"

If you are reading this Caz please know we are all right there with you ...one day at a time sweetheart...hope they are taking care of you ..

Williamsmum02 · 22/09/2011 00:01

Hope it's OK to post here... having a bad night, remembering my son who died 9 yrs ago. Somehow ended up reading Bereavement threads (which i usually avoid) and they have set me off big-time. Usually he is in the back of my mind but I can go days without thinking about him properly. Some days it feels like it all happened to somebody else - it is so long ago and happened when we were living abroad... I have three more children and am of course, super-busy, so in some ways it's good that I don't have time to sit and mope. Of course then it hits me HARD when it happens. It's nearly midnight and my mind is racing, tears flowing down my face... I just want to curl up in a ball and yell at the world. Where is he? Does he even still exist somewhere? Was it my fault? DH is away at a meeting tonight - if he was here I would not even have read the threads as he would have been nagging me to go to bed and get some rest!

We were living in the USA for DH's work. I had our first child, William, he was the first grandchild but only my mum ever got to meet him. She was visiting when the accident happened when he died. We were waiting to cross quite a busy road (which I had crossed many times before) with him in the buggy. Two cars clashed when one tried to change lanes, and the one closest to us just came at us - mounting the pavement and hitting us - it hit the buggy first and the force pushed me off my feet, and I hit a wall (breaking a vertebrae). I knew immediately that my son was either dead or dying. The whole thing seemed so surreal... It turned out later that one of the drivers was 16 and had got her licence THAT DAY (which was also her birthday). The other driver was 87 and could not see out of one eye (he panicked and accelerated - it was his car that hit us). Neither driver lost their licence, even though William's death cert. said that the cause of death was homicide. Why didn't I chase this up? Sometimes I feel like I should email someone and ask about this... but for everyone else this is eight years ago.

William would have been nine this December. I still miss his chunky little body and cute grin. I wish I'd made more of the time I had. I just want to hold him one more time.

Williamsmum02 · 22/09/2011 00:04

oh, and the elderly driver's wife was also celebrating her birthday that day. Do you know, I still almost rejoice that those two drivers could never celebrate those birthdays in quite the same way again. They will never be able to forget, even if they wanted to. Sometimes I feel like seeking them out and DOING something to make them feel as bad as I do. Other times I realise (in my more sane moments) that there is no purpose to that, it just makes me bitter and twisted up... it won't bring him back.

shabbapinkfrog · 22/09/2011 06:44

Morning girls xx

Welcome Williamsmum - sorry you had to find us but so glad you did.

Very sorry to hear such sad news about your precious little man xx

Minione · 22/09/2011 11:56

Hi Everyone, just a quick message to say that Ruairi Elias was born at 3.38 on tuesday morning. I went into labour on Monday evening and everything progressed quickly however he really didn't want to leave and had to face the dreaded forceps! He's absolutely gorgeous and we're all so happy. I will try to put a photo on but I'm not very techno savvy!

Hope everyone is ok, CAZ I'm thinking of you and hope you and Xander are doing well

Williamsmum - Welcome, thank you for sharing your precious little man with us, I'm sorry you had to find yourself here x

shabbapinkfrog · 22/09/2011 12:08

WOW welcome to the world Little Man xxxx

Congratulations - thats fantastic. Hope you are both doing well.

How do you pronounce his name? Its an amazing name just dont think Im saying it right LOL xxx

CheeseandGherkins · 22/09/2011 12:18

Mini that's fantastic news!! I'm so pleased for you! Hope you're recovering well and that Ruairi is also well :) So pleased to hear this xx

janedoe25 · 22/09/2011 12:39

Just catching up with the thread, caz I really feel for you, I hope everything is ok and Xander is safe and well. Im thinking about you x

mini huge congratulations!

Bluetinkerbell · 22/09/2011 13:33

Mini congratulations with your little boy!

shabbs I think you pronounce it as Rory
Williamsmum welcome! so sorry to hear about your little boy and how he became an angel!

Bluetinkerbell · 22/09/2011 18:29

Update from Caz she will be going home on Saturday! On 11th of October she will be induced to give birth to their screaming little boy! So keep the prayers going!

shabbapinkfrog · 22/09/2011 23:07

Read Caz's blog tonight and she sounds much calmer and 'sorted out' IYKWIM.

Will say goodnight ladies. As my lovely Nan always said 'Good night, God bless.'

shabbapinkfrog · 23/09/2011 06:43

Morning girls xx

Helyantha · 23/09/2011 08:39

Many congratulations, Mini! xx

CazandBelle · 23/09/2011 13:03

So thrilled for you Mini! I love his name! :)

Just letting you all know I have come home today instead of tomorrow. Had an awful night feeling claustrophobic so asked to be discharged this morning instead so I could get out properly to breathe! So I'm at home, feeling weepy and exhausted but generally ok. Going back daily for monitoring now anyway.

Induction 2 weeks and 4 days away.

OP posts: