Precious memories of all our beloved children, gone too soon but they will live on forever in our hearts

[lavandes]

For our beloved Richard, missed so much xx

Yum xx

Glass 3 of rose here!

Morning ladies. I just wondered if i could pic your brains???
A friend of mine died suddenly in his sleep early friday morning. He was only 21. I have sent his mum a message via facebook (i've never met her) saying something along the lines of I've never met her but am thinking of her and her family, Im sorry to here about her son and if theres anything i can do to let me know. I havent had a response and dont expect to. I'm going to get a card and take it over is there anything else i should do or say?
I know when Matt died we all really appreciated cards and a few gave flowers which was lovely. Im just not sure what to do with not knowing her personally. Thanks ladies

Morning all xx
oh Shelley that is such sad sad news. From my experience there is not really right and wrongs at this stage as his family will be totally in shock at the suddenness of it all. Personally I hated the flowers that kept arriving in the days after gregor died to the extent that I was sending them home with my visitors.. I wanted in the future to enjoy flowers. What I did find thoughtful were those folks who wrote to me with their special memories of gregor, and what he meant to them, what he did that made them laugh or smile. Just do what instinctively feels right for you... Sending you love and a huge hug xxxxxx

Morning girls. xx

Shelley - I agree that a letter would be wonderful. I still read the wonderful letters we received after Matt died. Many of them are from people I didn't know. x

With an adult child who dies it is lovely to hear from friends the same age who can share memories that the parents are probably not aware of. I have found out so much more of the funny things Sian got up to with her mates from their touching stories, helps to fill in the gaps. They have sent me so many photos from their times together that I would probably never have seen. Flowers are lovely but as they die it just seems to rub it in, letters and photos better.

Ive just read about Amanda Holden losing her baby!!! It brings back lots of horrible memories!!

Morning girls xx

So sad for Amanda Holden. She only told the press a few weeks ago - poor lady - 7 months pregnant.

Ladies - just seen the news about Amanda Holden. I know this will be very hard for so many of you to read. Just wanted to let you know you're in my thoughts.

So hard to go through that dreadful experience without the eyes of the world trying to catch every last image of human frailty. Let's hope they get the privacy and respect they need and deserve at such a terrible time.

Kazmus, i read what you said about people telling you stories about Sian, our vicar in our parish always says that at funerals, to tell the family stories and share memories. People have told me amazing stories about Wilfs dad that i can tell him. My late dh Frank was in the Marines and the SAS and was attached to the SBS. His last job before he retired in 1980 was to train all the men who stormed the Iranian Embassy. We have all his SAS plaques and certificate on the wall.

I meant to say Thanks to Northernlurker as well for your kind remarks and for thinking of us......

Morning ladies xx

shelley I am so sorry your friend has died.So young it is dreadful and such a shock for you all. I agree with the other ladies that a letter would be a good idea. With a letter you have the time to think about what you want to say. We had letters which gave us such comfort when Richard died, I sometimes take a look at them. Our house was full of flowers but when they had all died it seemed so bare if you know what I mean xx

Hi Ladies, hope youare all ok

Shelley - so sorry to hear about your friend. Aletter and a card would be a lovely idea and I'm sure his parents would appreciate your thoughts and kindness.

Just read about AManda Holden, that poor, poor woman. I feel so sorry for her and her husband, when I read that it was a little boy and she was 7 months it made it even more upsetting. Have been crying for her and her baby and for my darling Malachy x

Hope this is OK, but I've just heard about Amanda Holden's baby son, and I can't imagine what it is like for you ladies and your families when you hear news of this nature. Didn't want to intrude, just for you all to know that you're all in a lot of people's thoughts.

Oh god I hope Amanda and her family get the support they need. I am so sorry for her

I dunno why but last night I had terrible flashbacks to Frasers funeral...it was soo vivid. It has really knocked me for six

Shelly - do whart your heart tells you and you wont go wrong. You know from experience that just bein there will make a huge difference

Ditto all the comments above about how dreadfully sorry I feel for Amanda Holden and her partner.... so soooo tragically sad . Am feeling rotten today physically (rotten cough and sore throat bug) and think that when i'm run down physically my grief feels much worse than normal - whatever the hell normal is. Have just taken ds1 round to a friends for a couple of hours and feel like i'm wallowing....it is just so soooo tough

And thanks northern and knotty - it is nice of you to come and let us know you are thinking of us all xx

Pppm* I think when we are feeling low physically we feel worse about our grief, if that is possible. I seem to feel worse - not so able to cope, more weepy - when I am physically tired. But, sometimes the awful reality of it all hits me as if from nowhere, I suppose this is what we must expect to deal with forever. xx

I think the press saying that the death of Amanda Holden's baby is a miscarriage is totally wrong xx

peterpan, don't ever feel you're wallowing..you are just so much closer to the edge of the abyss on these days and need support to pull you back from the edge. It would be Sians 25th birthday tomorrow and I have my cancer tests at the hospital she was born at in the afternoon. I have even thought I dont care if the results are positive as dying would bring me closer to her again...I have another younger daughter and a wonderful husband so how ridiculous and selfish is that? The edge is very close tonight but letting it out here is a huge help, keep talking to everyone who understands what you're going through.

Kazmus I hope all goes ok for you tomorrow............ Sending love and prayers..................

good luck with the tests tomorrow kazmus,I will light a candle for you and your family tomorrow in memory of your precious Sian xx

Morning girls xx

Kaz - will be lighting my candle today in honour and with respect for your precious girl. I understand your words so much. Hope everything is OK for you today xx

Morning ladies xx

Morning all , kazmus a candle is lit here for your gorgeous girl . Good luck for this afternoon , you are in my thoughts xx

Hiya everyone xx Am feeling a bit brighter today both physically and emotionally - yesterday was indeed just a little tooo close to the edge for my liking.

Kazmus - Am thinking of you and have lit a candle for your gorgeous Sian - good luck at the hospital - am thinking of you xxxxx