when can i reasonably expect a baby to start settling at 7ish?

[VictorVictoria]

Have 4.5 week old dd. Strggling to settle her 7-midnight. Driving me insane. Whatks normal?

It really depends on your baby. Sorry, that is no help at all.
We started settling our ds at about 7 when he was about 6 weeks, which coincided with getting the babysoothe cd, which had a miraculous effect on his sleeping. I think with my next baby I will be a bit more relaxed about having him around later in the evening.

The first weeks are sooooo hard, it DOES get easier.

answering because don't want you to feel ignored, but not much help. 7pm bedtime started at 2 weeks for us, but he woke at 10, 10.45, 11.30, 12.15, 1am etc for a long time after that. turned out in our case that we had various problems, in particular ds had jaundice. Hope someone more helpful comes along.

How are you feeding her? BF babies will normally cluster feed until around 6 weeks.
Either way I kept both DD's downstairs with us and took them up when I went to bed until they started to fall asleep down here at around 8ish and slept properly, then I took them up at 7. With both this was around 6-8 weeks and now they both (2years and 20 weeks) go up together at 7.

are you breastfeeding? it's normal for a bf baby to want to cluster feed in the evenings, which may be what she is doing.
way too early to expect to be able to settle her down for the evening IMO
keep her with you and feed on demand

With my DS it was definitely before 6 months but after 15 weeks. But it was 7.45 not 7. He was awful in the 7-12 slot as well. But he is just 7 and has been a fantastic sleeper since he was 1. But definitely at 6 months he was doing something like 7.45-5.45 (but then up for the day).

DD was a bit better at the early evenings but took longer to go through the night.

Hi my dd3 (5 months) has only been going up to bed at 6 for the last 6 weeks or so, as i kept her downstairs in her pram whilst she still had feeds at 9 and midnight. Now by 5 she gets very ratty and is usually in bed by 6.30 at the latest and dd1 (6) and dd2 (3 next month) go up at 7.30.

i started putting my youngest 3 down at 7.30(more like 8 for dd3 though in the early weeks)from birth,but they would still faff about and want feeding again etc untill 6 weeks,when they started to become more predictable.

dd2 and dd3 both started going to bed at 7 from about 10 months,when they became mobile.

IME (but all mine were formula fed) they tend to go slightly longer between feeds from 6 weeks,plus they start to become more alert and notice theres a difference betwen night and day.

i think we started to put the dsses upstairs at about 10 weeks

maybe a bit earlier with ds1

in the early weeks they napped/dozed downstairs with us

ps congratulations! i missed a birth announcement

DD was at her most unsettled in the evenings. I used to find it easier to keep her downstairs with us and put her to bed at around 10/11 pm. From 5 weeks she'd sleep through from then until 7.30am, but I was very lucky with that! It was quite a few months later when I'd start putting her to bed earlier.

Bear with it, it won't be like this for ever.

Started from 5 weeks with DS with consistent bedtime routine - bath at 6pm followed by dressing then dimly lit quiet feed and in bed by 6.30pm. Dream feed at 10 - 10.30 ish. Slept through from 10 weeks, dropped dream feed at 3 months I think.Have stuck to this and DS now 20 months and fabulous sleeper sleeping a solid 12 hours a night. Second baby due May and will do exactly the same again at same sort of age IF I can - very aware I got very lucky first time around. Why are you wanting to settle 7 - 12? 5 hours is a very long time for a 4 week old to go without milk...

I confused myself so much with this in the early days with dd- "she's a BABY. Babies go to bed EARLY, don't they?". Then realised that if she fed pretty much non-stop from 5-10pm, she was one happy girl, slept better, we slept better, and things started looking up. She did end up covered in pasta sauce as I'd eat my dinner while feeding her.

Mine is coming upto 8mths and has only just started getting to sleep by 7pm. I think it is because we are temporarily sleeping in a room with only skylights for windows and they have no curtains/blinds. Now that the days are getting longer, she wakes at around 6.30am when it starts to get light, and then gets exhausted by 7pm!

yes do let me know. ds is 2.11 and has never fallen asleep before 8. ever. and he gets up at 6am.

With both of ours it was about 4-6 wks. After the first week we always did bedtime routine and they were ready for bed by about 6.30pm, then we would put them in their cot at about 7pm or whenever they were ready for a nap. If they didn't settle or woke up after not long we would just have them in living room with us and try again later. Eventually they just start settling better and sleeping longer!

I do know dd was still waking up for an 11 p.m. feed when she was 11 months. I have no memories of what ds did, expect I was too knackered.

We didnt start doing this with DS until he was 4 months old but that was because he had colic for the first 3 months and just wouldnt settle. He is a good sleeper now though (usually!)

I'm pregnant again and will certainly try to put the new baby down at 7ish as soon as possible, but like others say, it does depend on the child.

Go with the flow re bedtime. She doesn't have to be asleep by 7 PM.

Focus on surviving the first three months. Once your DD is 3 months old, it will all get much easier.

It was around 3-4 months for us, and I wouldn't have bothered except for the fact that dd1 was going up at 7 (she is 4 years) and dd2, now 6 months is/was a bad sleeper at night.

We were up/down up/down all evening for several weeks (we don't leave our babies to cry at all) but eventually the time she took to settle got less and less and now she is tired around 6.30/7. The nights are another story entirely, but I couldn't stand having no evening followed by a bad night.

We didn't do the early bedtime thing until they were sleeping regularly until the early hours, so about 3 months or so. And even then, bedtime has never been before 8pm, because we don't do pre-7am waking!

In the meantime they all napped or fed or were cuddled downstairs with us until our bedtime.

Worked for us.

I don't think my daughter ever went to bed at 7 before she started walking at about 13 months. At three months and less, her bedtime was the same as mine - about 11pm. Now that she's nearly 18 months, she goes to bed at 8ish and sleeps through until 6.30 or 7. At 4 or 5 weeks, what I found easiest was to watch telly with daughter on my lap on a pillow, fast asleep, and feed her whenever she woke up. This also meant my other half had to fetch me tea, snacks, magazines and books, which suited me just fine!

I didn't even attept it with either of mine until about 5 weeks. I BF and in the first couple of weeks with both DD1 and DD2 had them down with DH and I in the moses basket during the evening. They were both v unsettled and screaming between 7pm and 11ish, I would do a final feed around 10.30 and then settle them properly by midnight. But I found with both that by around 5 weeks ish my patience was at an end and i made a concerted effort to get them into bed upstairs from 7 pm. With both it took me about 4 or 5 days but we soon got it sorted (bath, feed, dummy, swaddle, vigourous rocking of the moses basket in the dark... repeat 'dummy, swaddle, rock' as necessary, i.e lots!!). Initially i'd find it would take me a good hour or more to get them settled so I was exhausted and damned if i'd wake them again for a 10.30 feed, and with both I found (to my surprise) that once settled they then slept from about 8.30 to 2 am ish then 6am. After a week or so of working at settling at 7pm I found they both went down brilliantly at 7 ish and slept to 3am ish then 7am ish. The early hours feed then gets later and later until we got to a stage of regular waking at around 5.30am ish, at which point i decided that night feeds were over and I would never feed before 6.30 come what may - I felt if they could make it that far they could last until morning! Arbitary I know and possibly mean, but it worked for me. DD1 slept 7pm to 7am by around 9 weeks and DD2 at about 10 weeks.

At first, DS used to stay down in moses basket with us til we went to bed. We noticed that at about 7 weeks he was falling asleep about 8:30ish and we were having to wake him to dress him for bed and feed him to put him back to sleep again.

We started about this time of getting him ready for bed and putting him in his cot at 8:30pm. By about 11 weeks we had moved this time forwards to 7:30pm as he was sleeping for longer and longer. Ever since he has slept through til 6:30-7:30 am.

Make sure you get a good routine going- whatever works for you. We bath ds at 6:45pm ish and take him upstairs to his room with the lights dimmed. We give massage, dress for bed and feed. He's usually asleep in minutes of being in his cot (around 7:30) with no fuss at all.

The first 5 or six weeks though, we never even thought of putting him upstairs as he would still be wide awake at 11pm sometimes! It doesn't last long though. Try and get a routine established as early as possible. Good luck!

My dd is 2 years and still doesn't go up at 7!

Thanks all. I do have 2.5 year old ds and I know he was settling reliably by 12 weeks. I would then wake him to feed at 10. I just can't remember when he started doing this. We are already doing the bath, feed, settle, bed thing 6-7 and I have settled her once but mainly she yells on and off till 10, feed her again and then I struggle to settle her for the night before 12.30. Am hoping it will miraculously improve at 7/8 weeks...