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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

TV in childrens Rooms????????????

60 replies

TVornoTV · 25/10/2007 08:57

My two children aged 5 (girl) and 7 (boy) have been arguing constantly this half term about the TV - we only have the one - they do not have one in their rooms. They don't watch it all the time obviously but whenits on they argue about it - usualy because one wants a dvd and the other wants the Playstation. DH thinks we should get them one to take the TV out of the equation iyswim! Most of their friends have TV's in their rooms. Obviously it would be limited....... but what do people think. Good idea or not? what are your experiences? Thanks for your input!!!!!

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ScaryScienceT · 25/10/2007 09:47

Bad idea

Surr3ymummy · 25/10/2007 09:57

Any room for a TV in the kitchen/diner - wall mounted perhaps? We have a small LCD with an integral DVD which can be watched from the kitchen table. Not as comfortable, but that's no bad thing.

One of the problems with having a TV in the bedroom is that once it's there it's hard to remove, and as they become teenagers you will find it impossible to control. Plus I sometimes send mine to their room if they're out of order - if there's a TV there then it's not exactly a punishment!

Nightynight · 25/10/2007 09:57

No Way.
They do NOT need it.

Solve the arguments by throwing the playstation away, and telling them they've got to share the TV.

Original poster

TVornoTV · 25/10/2007 10:00

just been talking to DH about it again - he was saying he has a problem with them falling asleep in front of the TV if they are laying on their beds watching it, so suggested we put the TV's so they have to sit on the floor to watch it so they don't get too comfortable LOL. Trouble is in my heart of heart I against it, but sometimes the arguing is so bad and I want to do something that will make life easier - for all us. I don't want the kids resenting each other as they get older because of the TV. ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What to do???????????????

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Nightynight · 25/10/2007 10:02

ime, the more you give children, the more they want. Mine also have arguments over the tv, but they are learning valuable life skills of compromising and sharing (well, in theory anyway - or maybe they are practising fighting)

Original poster

TVornoTV · 25/10/2007 10:03

The reason I want thoughts from those who do have TV's in their kids rooms is because I disagree with it in principal - but I am interested to know if changing my mind will make things easier. I'm not going to let them up there for hours on end watching it - especially as I fundamentally disagree with it - just use it to stop the arguements.

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GillL · 25/10/2007 10:05

I don't see what harm it can do if regulated. As you say you will limit the time and it will result in more harmony within the family. My dd has a tv in her room but she is never allowed to spend long up there watching it. Ds likes to watch his programmes when he gets in from work so it's useful for the night garden.

Original poster

TVornoTV · 25/10/2007 10:05

Nightynight - yes thats what I always tellpeople when they ask why they don't have TV's in their rooms. They have had years of negotiating and stuff and they have done really well at it - I have said if they can't agree it goes off - but as they are getting older they are both becoming more bloody minded and the negotiating seems to have got lost and in its place is shouting and screaming LOL

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ScaryScienceT · 25/10/2007 10:06

I have found that giving them expensive gadgets does not generally improve behaviour. It just gives them something to get hooked onto and can make it very hard to communicate with them - and get them to do jobs in the house.

Original poster

TVornoTV · 25/10/2007 10:07

Thanks GillL!!!!! I must admit when we were on holiday in Australia and staying with family - they had a room with a TV and PS2 in just for the kids and it was really nice being able to watch grown up TV before 8pm!!!!!!!! Also the other children in the house had TV's in their rooms so there was no arguing.

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Original poster

TVornoTV · 25/10/2007 10:09

ScaryScienceT - I am not saying that if I get them TV's they will get hooked on them - they won't be allowed to watch it more - just when one wants something on downstairs the other can go and watch something else upstairs rather than arguing.

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GillL · 25/10/2007 10:12

If you teach them right from the beginning that it is not be be used after dinner, for example and for more than an hour per day then they should be fine with it. If you find that they abuse the privelege then take it away. I'm sure they'll soon change their behaviour.

EmsMum · 25/10/2007 10:24

TVs in bedrooms sound like a bad idea.

However, one with no actual TV channels (no sky, no freeview, no aerial) might be tolerable. DVDs or/or playstation hookup only.
Strictly limited usage. If they turn it on without permission you can remove the fuse from the plug for a while

My DD has a computer (no internet) and TV in her playroom. The former is an old one that it seemed a shame to just chuck, latter is purely because she still sometimes watches old videos. She would never use them without asking but actually hardly uses them. Its not the presence of kit, its how, and how much, its used.

formerlyknownasfatslag · 25/10/2007 10:36

A little story: I know a family, Mum, Dad, DS aged 11. Every evening after dinner, Dad goes to parents bedroom to use computer and watch the TV in there, Mum watches TV in the main room and DS watches TV or playstations in his bedroom.

I know I shouldn't judge (but who doesn't but I think that's sad.

crazylife · 25/10/2007 10:36

glad to see more are coming through that have tv's.

Each to their own. I personally not a fan of send my ds to his bedroom for punishment, even if he didn't have a tv, i dont see him playing with his toys as a form of punishment at all.

Think its one of those things tvontv that people wont agree on. I am sure there are plenty who don't have a tv in the kids bedroom, but have it on all day downstairs while they have to feed their mumsnet addiction

I sleep soundly knowing that the days are filled with plenty of outdoor time and family time, we do curl up and watch films together, and happy for him to go to bed an hour early to watch a film of his choice.

If you are totally against it, then don't go against what you feel, but you know your kids better than everyone else and you know whats best for them.

crazylife · 25/10/2007 10:37

fkafs that is very sad. pretty much what dh home life was life. Thats why ours is nothing like it.

Original poster

TVornoTV · 25/10/2007 10:51

Thanks for your input crazylife.......I completely understand what you're saying. My don't get sent to their rooms for punishment either - only maybe to calm down if things are getting heated!!! I imagine if they did have TV's in their rooms then putting a DVD on while calming down in their room would be a good thing. My two are upstairs playing now - as we've done baking this morning already, I wish I had time to feed any addiction ;)They are happy together at the moment. I know that when they come down wanting to chill out they will argue again!!!

OP posts:

Georgeous · 25/10/2007 11:00

DD is a bit young for TV in her room but I hope when the time comes i will say no. How can they get a good night's sleep?

Original poster

TVornoTV · 25/10/2007 11:01

I wouldn't let them have it on at bedtime............

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hanaflower · 25/10/2007 11:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster

TVornoTV · 25/10/2007 11:04

Surely watching a kids DVD is calming for kids.................and again I'm not saying at bedtime.....it wouldn't be on then

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bluenosesaint · 25/10/2007 11:10

My dd has a TV and DVD player in her bedroom and she got it when she was 5 almost 6.

She just uses it so that she and her little sister (aged 4) can play CDs on the DVD player and have a 'party' ...a VERY expensive CD player methinks

As you can see, i have never had the problem of 'over-use'

crazylife · 25/10/2007 11:10

so you wouldn't let them have it on at bedtime then? lol

My son watches tv before bed and his telly goes off at 8.30 on a school night and he sleep peacefully until 7.30 then next morning.

I have a tv in my bedroom and we watch telly in bed to wind down, and I sleep fine until the alarm. I find it very calming to wind down before sleep.

WalkingCorpseScum · 25/10/2007 11:34

Personally I wouldn't let my child have a tv in his room so young, or preferably at all. There are ways to chill other than the tv. I think solitary tv watching is quite a sad thing really.

I don't see a problem with a it's your turn, then your turn or it's nobody's turn attitude. So what if they argue and moan more now than when they were younger, some things have to be learned.

Tortington · 25/10/2007 11:34

its a snobbery thing - if you don't want to appear like youare devolving your parental resposability with regards to a night time routine -to the telly - then you shouldn't have one.

becuase "good mums" read stories and make their children go to sleep without electronic devices!

thats the implication anyway.

my teens have tellies - but not connected to tv - just for gaming and dvd purposes. they dont have it on at bedtime.

they didn't when they were younger - cos we were skint.

my own personal view is that telly should have its place within the normal day - this could be to wind down after work - after the evening meal etc. but i wouldnt put in small childs room - becuase they would get goggle eyes and i would ignore them and mumsnet all day.

there is TV snobbery - with a recent thread where people exclaim they have given up the telly - like its heroin.

its akin to growing your own vegetables in my mind and having a pig called henry that your fatening up for sunday lunch.

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