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Original poster

my partner smacked my dd

456 replies

majormug · 07/09/2006 23:03

help.... the other night my partner smacked my daugter because she licked her hands after she had eaten a doughnut..... he had told her not to and told her to go wash her hands.... temptation got the better of her and she licked them. i giggled because its the sort of thing i would do. it was a smack not a tap. he isnt in my good books anyway.... long story but we havent been together long and even her daddy wouldnt smack for something so trivial. he is always getting at her.... on a recent holiday she went through a 'dribbly' phase (how else do i put it.... little accidents' he went mad... took away privaledges and i had to turn my head whilst i cried. i know that this is def NOT the way to treat her or deal with her but our relationship is very fragile...

OP posts:
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Tutter · 10/09/2006 12:21

good luck MM. don't look back.

arfishymeau · 10/09/2006 12:40

Well done for getting out MM. You will look back when it's all over and be happy that you've made the right decision.

Your ex doesn't deserve you or your DD in his life.

If you need Mumsnet for support you can get really cheap old second or third hand computers now and use a dial up connection - I've had to use dial up all over the world to get mumsnet and it's just fine.

redbull · 10/09/2006 12:44

cheap laptops

makemineadouble · 10/09/2006 13:07

nice one redbull lol

Tyedye · 10/09/2006 15:51

Message withdrawn

runkid · 10/09/2006 18:28

Have you moved out and are you ok

MrsApronstrings · 10/09/2006 18:52

just read the thread - hoping you've got out.XXX

pinkchampagne · 10/09/2006 18:58

I have also just caught up with this thread, & hope that you got out ok.xx

ills · 10/09/2006 19:00

Take care. Hope you are OK

thinkingmum · 10/09/2006 22:06

Good luck with getting yourself and your daughter away from this man. My mum didn't know about the abuse her daughter was receiving so has had try to help pick up the pieces of a sad adult woman and live with her guilt. You have the advantage that you know what this man is capable of, be thankful for that and act on it. Can anyone advise MM on an organisation which may give her actual life help and strength to get out of this situation.

bubblepop · 10/09/2006 22:38

its time to move on. you owe it to your dd.

Cassoulet · 10/09/2006 23:25

Majormug, have you got out? I know it leaves you without computer and therefore no access to mn. I do hope you've managed it OK. Best of luck to you. My thoughts are with you.

CHOCOLATEPEANUT · 11/09/2006 00:12

I am just catching up here..

I read that you put "her daddy was abusive also"

Was that to you or her or both? You seem very frightened about being on your own but when you have a child you are never on your own.

I am happily married now but was married to a monster before.We had no children (thank god he was infertile) and he bullied me until i was a shell of a person.I would not leave through fear and one day something just snapped and I stood upto him.He beat me but i fought back and I think it lost its appeal to him after that.I walked out with £7 in my purse, a bin bag of clothes and the dog and NEVER looked back.

I am now living in another universe with a lovely man and our dd.But it changed me.I love my dh sooooo much but if he ever did anything you described (he wouldnt never though, he cant even tell dd off when she is naughty) I would do time for his murder.simple.

even a wild animal will protect its young.

Earlybird · 11/09/2006 20:17

Thinking of you, and hoping all is well. Let us know when you get a chance.

Cassoulet · 12/09/2006 23:27

Still here thinking of you majormug. Look after yourself.

MrsApronstrings · 12/09/2006 23:52

just making sure this doesn't go from my list..

Cassoulet · 13/09/2006 22:48

Still thinking of you majormug.

jacksma · 13/09/2006 23:42

Just a word of advice - having worked with many women who have left abusive relationships - just spend some time working out what you want/need from a relationship before getting into another. You said your previous relationship was abusive and I would suggest you need to regain some self confidence before you start anything new - abusive men tend to pick on women they can bully and that may be you if you venture into a relationship when feeling low and vulnerable - the best relationships are ones you want rather than need - and it is always better to be with noone than the wrong one. Very good luck to you...

makemineadouble · 14/09/2006 12:05

MM just jumped on to check if there's any word on you hope your ok Choc P what lovely ending and brill advice

makemineadouble · 14/09/2006 12:06

Jacksma this is so true why do we women do this ?

Vindaloo · 14/09/2006 12:24

Just read this thread. MM i hope you have moved out now, please let us know how you are getting on. Thinking of you and your daughter. XX

Kessernags · 14/09/2006 12:26

majormug, have you moved out? I have just read through everyones comments and I really hope that you have taken your daughter and moved out. Let us all know that you are OK.

Earlybird · 14/09/2006 12:27

Yes, thinking of you too and watching this thread for news. Let us know how you are please.

majormugsfriend · 14/09/2006 13:06

She's still there AFAIK.
Don't know what to do anymore, I can't help her until she helps herself & her dd . I can't physical go and pick her & her dd up and remove them, although I wish I could.
Sometimes I wonder if she really wants to leave, although I cannot understand why she stays.

desperateSCOUSEwife · 14/09/2006 13:10

mmfriend
you cant do anymore for her
you sound like a good friend for being there
but it must gall you tbh