Potty training.

[callie]

Iam going to try and potty train my dd who is 21mths.
Would love some advice or tips.
Did you put yours straight in pants and put them on the pot every hr or so??

OK I have a question! Ds is completely potty trained when he isn't wearing anything, and half potty trained when wearing pants. How do we progress to him wearing clothes and going out places. My mil took him out for the day yesterday without nappies and she used up 3 different change of clothes! Do we just persevere with taking him out and hoping he'll remember to tell us? Thanks!

I'd go with persevering, perhaps with regular pit-stops while you're out? DS2 went 4 days without an accident last week (3 wks into training) but went through 5 sets of clothes at nursery yesterday. Do you mind a little bribery, my kids always seem to manage trips out a lot better if there's a reward at the end (biscuit/stickers).

jessi, it will get better - but for now try not to take ds out for long day trips...short trips if necessary (with changes of clothes! and a full knowledge of all public toilets!) Also try to wait to go out just after he has done a wee, so hopefully he might "last the distance" - not always practical I know, just a thought. And of course the odd reminder - remember to tell mum/nan if you need to do a wee (rather than do you need the toilet which almost always gets a no!)

Ghosty, hope things are going well with the Potty Under the Stairs (sounds like a children's book!). Yes we did make a big fuss of ds, and happily his nan and pop were here for the weekend too so he had huge applause. I know what you mean about chasing them around the house lol - seems a bit absurd sometimes doesn't it!? How can they possibly be faster than us when their legs are half the size!?

Thanks mollipops! Tried today with the Potty Under the Stairs and he just looked at me as if I had lost the plot completely (he's not far off the mark there!).

He did tell me when he was busy doing his business that 'Mummy has to sit on the toilet and do a poo poo now!'

Well, I know one should do anything for one's child but really, there are limits!

Will keep trying (potty training that is!)

OK, I am now a little worried.

On the subject of not doing poos in the potty/toilet and ds being upset when I change his nappy - we have just had a bit of a stressful hour.

DS hasn't done a poo for two days, which is strange enough as he is a once a day boy. Anyway he was in the bath this evening and crying because he said he had a tummyache. DH asked him if he needed a poo and he said he did (we know that more than anything he hates doing poos in the bath). So DH took him out of the bath and put him on the toilet. I kept out of it as if I interfere DH gets the hump. However after 20 minutes of crying I decided to step in and DS decided he would rather sit on the potty. I know from past experience that if he wasn't interested he would not have sat for so long but he sat on the potty for another 20 minutes. He was obviously in a lot of pain and he was trying to do a poo but he just kept crying, very distressed and saying it hurt.

Eventually he got up, said that he couldn't do it so he got into his pjs, had his milk and passed out exhausted. (Remember that we are in NZ and it is nighttime here now)

We think he might be constipated as he has got such a problem with being near the 'poo poo' that he is avoiding doing one altogether, even in his nappy.

I don't think he has ever gone 24 hrs without a poo (even when he was bf).

Any ideas on what I should do? He has a very good diet - eats loads of veggies (his favourite food) and fruit and drinks lots of fluids.

DH is so keen for DS to be potty trained but do you think I ought to give up completely and leave it a few months?

Mollipops, thanks for the advice, have done 4 short trips with ds in the last few days, no accidents! Just remind him to have a wee before we leave and then when we get back, bless him! Do I now just carry on with this, until gradually the times get longer?
Also, what about night times, dh is not keen to leave him without a nappy at night, but he very rarely has a wet nappy when we get him up and always sits on the potty the minute he's up. MIL says I should stop using them at night, what does anyone else think?
Ghosty, sorry your having such a difficult time, if he is getting into a pickle about pooing then I would leave it for abit I think!? But who am I to say as I haven't got much of a clue about my own situation with ds!! Good luck!

One thing that comes to mind, Ghosty, is that your DS may have an anal fissure. It's a little slit in the skin on the bottom and can be excruitatingly painful. I'm not sure how you deal with it, as none of mine have ever had it, but someone on Mumsnet will know, I'm sure. Hope you both have some success soon.

DS woke up early this morning and finally did a poo! He did it in his nappy though and wouldn't let me near him to put him on the potty. GRRRRR

SueDonim - he does seem to have a sore bottom so I will take him to the docs if it gets any worse.

Hurray! DS just did a poo in the potty! OK so it was a rabbit dropping but a poo nonetheless!

Blimey - this is all so basic isn't it? Sorry but had to share it with someone!

That's good news, Ghosty - long may it continue.

Oh Joy of Joys!

I think we have had a major breakthrough! DS has spent most of the day in just the top half of his clothes - thought we would give it another go and he has done every wee in the potty, with very little encouragement! We just left the potty where he could see it and every so often he got up from whatever he was doing and did it!!!

BUT that's not it! About 10 minutes ago he was watching telly and he got off the sofa, went to the potty and did a 'proper' poo! He was a little shocked by it I have to say but DH and I just hugged and kissed him and told him what a good big boy he was. (We also gave him a chocolate froggie - is that wise to reward with sweets? - he doesn't eat many normally)

I am ecstatic, especially as I didn't sleep last night worrying about it!

Does this mean we've cracked it? No more nappies? Can we start spending the money on something else now - like a manicure or facial for me?

Congratulations Ghosty! That is fantastic news! Its so weirdly thrilling isn't it!

I have just reread my post and now wonder what has happened to my life! Where oh where have those days of clubbing, pubbing, shopping in shops with no children's wear in sight, going to the movies whenever you like and most importantly staying in bed until noon on a Sunday gone?

Can poo really be this exciting?

Ghosty - congrats to you and your ds. I know what you mean about your life - when dd finally went out on the bus with me in only pants and was dry all day I had phoned 6 people to tell them before I thought 'I must get a life ......'
We rewarded with sweete - it worked! She isn't demanding a chocolate button wit every trip now, it wore off fairly quickly. Whatever works!!

Hi. My dd is 23 months, and has been dry by day for a month now when we're in the house...I was just wondering how you broach the subject of leaving the house without a nappy on...do you take a travel potty, or just hope for the best? It's really been confusing me! lol! DD is quite happy to use a toilet if it's got a child seat on it, so I'm going to get one of those fold-up ones...but what if there's no toilet? I had considered buying some trainer pants, and putting them on her when we go out, in case of an accident, but wasn't sure if this would make her less likely to say she needed a wee or poo.
Also, just wondering how you go about training on a night..how do you know they are ready?
Sorry to go on for so long! lol!

Aimeesmum, I think if your dd has been dry for a month, then it's a good idea to try the knickers-all-day idea, as it can be confusing to have nappies put on sometimes and not other times. The best advice I could give you is to make sure you start with very short trips out. Do it at a period when you don't have a lot of running around to do, and try to go where there are toilets nearby (check where they are asap!). Also ask her before you go out to use the potty/toilet; if she doesn't respond to this yet, just wait until she does a wee and then go out (if feasible)! Take a change of clothes with you, as well as a small towel, some wipes and a plastic bag. Sounds like a big hassle I know, and you may not need them but they will be very handy if you do! After a week or two she should have the idea that she needs to go beforehand, or let you know as soon as she gets "the urge", when you are going out.

As for the bedtime thing, is her nappy usually dry in the morning (you can tell by its weight)? If not I would wait until it is...she's only little and you have both done well to get this far before age 2! Good luck & HTH!

I've been really chuckling while reading these messages. Ghosty - you've prob. stopped reading these now cos you last posted at the beginning of the month, but your chats really made me grin.. I too have been dreaming/living and cheering the arrival of 'poo' in the proper places. Did you ever dream you'd be doing this?

My ds is now (thankfully) trained because he started nursery a few weeks ago. It's funny how it all eventually settles into place doesn't it, and all your angst has been a waste of time really.... actually, ds bypassed the poo in the potty bit and first did it in the toilet (although I think it was by mistake!) He was a bit 'loose' and it came out. He shouted out to me and said "Mummy happy now?" I nodded vigorously wondering where my life had gone!

It's been plain sailing from there, although I've not even approached nights yet. His nappy is still 10lbs heavier in the morning ....so we'll leave that one.

Funny thing is when he does the poo, I have to go out (where did they get the privacy thing from?) and he calls me when he's finished. When I go in to 'help' him, he's sitting on the loo, his little feet curled up on his stool and he's bent over his knees in anticipation... he then solemly hands me some toilet tissue......

Ah, bless him. He's SO cute... but as for facials and manicures..... HUH!!!

I'm glad you've cracked it Munchkinsugarpie! We are still at it here. Fine with no clothes on, accidents when he wears pants - I am refusing to be stressed about it at this stage as we are moving in two weeks time (timing!!!??!) and thought that if I really go for it completely it might go all pear shaped when we move house! He is however, been an absolute star about the pooing in the potty situation and I am a little embarrassed that I made such a fuss about it a couple of weeks ago (head hanging and blushing!)
So the softly, softly approach - when we are at home no kit on and uses the potty, when we leave the house nappy on.
Once we are settled in our new house we will go for it once and for all!
PS How long should I give him in the new house do you reckon before I clamp down?

Another graduate here,ds has cracked it too, and he's dry at night at the same time.. only drawback is he calls me at sometimes 6am telling me he wants a wee..bit of a struggle to get him to go back to sleep! hey ho ! Good luck Ghosty, sounds like your little ones almost there too!

I'm glad it's going well Ghosty... I'd take my lead from ds .. by the time you've settled in yr new house, and toilet training's been on a 'back-burner' for a bit you may well find that he's just graduated on his own.

They all get there in the end, it just doesn't feel like it when you're struggling. I remember thinking he a) wouldn't teeth b) wouldn't walk, c) wouldn't talk (mind you, still can't properly!) and definitely not use a toilet... now he's just growing up before my eyes and all the baby stages have gone!

Good luck in the move and let us know how it's going..

Hi. Thanks for the advice about taking dd out of the house without a nappy on..I'lld efinatley give it a go, and take all the things out with me that I need.
Her nappy is still rather heavy when she gets up in the morning, and she does sleep from 7:30pm-7:30am so it is rather a long time to ask her to be dry!
Thanks again.

Just about to tackle this fun stage! Can anyone recommend a good cleaning product to have at home to take care of those inevitable accidents!

Your partner!

Vanish Powershot spray.

Just wanted to add my thoughts on the night time nappy bit. It took quite a while for DS to get the hang of potty training. Like many I was using nappies when we went out and I think it was confusing. Then we had to get up early to take DH to station for a while, meaning I had to wake DS in the mornings. I noticed his nappies were virutally dry. I went totally "pants" for daytime and by the end of the week he'd cracked it. Next week we tried nightimes but he immediatly wet the bed. I'm rushing I thought. Back to nappy, nappy dry. So I persisted. It was like he needed to have a couple of accidents to get the hang of it but by the end of the week he's cracked that one too.

DD went through the same process and this time I was wise to the nighttime nappy thing. Once she'd cracked daytimes I had a go at nighttimes even though her nappies were still bulging. I'm sure its just that they wake up in the morning, pee, play, pee etc. After a couple of nights she too mastered it so now we have no nappies at all. Woopee!