Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Please or to access all these features

Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

Potty training.

231 replies

callie · 06/02/2002 08:57

Iam going to try and potty train my dd who is 21mths.
Would love some advice or tips.
Did you put yours straight in pants and put them on the pot every hr or so??

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
SueDonim · 21/02/2002 14:10

Have you tried using a toliet instead, with a toddler seat? Or starting him off on the potty while he's still wearing a nappy, then taking small steps, such as putting a nappy over the potty to sit on rather than actually wearing it etc? Good luck!

Pupuce · 21/02/2002 14:43

I agree maybe toilet is better than potty in his case. Not all kids use potties !

monkey · 24/02/2002 13:27

Thanks for your suggestions. I have tried toilet as much as potty with him - he has his own mini seat but he is as uninterested in that as he is with the potty. I have regularly tried him naked from waist down - he likes this but it makes no difference. If he needs to wee he just does it where he is then comes and tells me. Even if he's stood 1 foot from the potty it makes no difference.I haven't tried nappy on potty though, so I will give that a go.

Does anyone else know what, if anything I can do to light a spark of interest or desire in him?

lou33 · 24/02/2002 15:19

I got my son started by letting him sit in with his dad at the same time! So whenever dad needed to go we got the potty out and gave ds a magazine to sit and look at to divert his attention, lol. I know it sounds mad but it worked! Ds is 3 now and has gone on to weeing standing up, just because he was daddy's shadow for a while in the bathroom! It might be worth a try. If dad isn't there enough then maybe you could sit in with him instead, I wouldn't have thought it really matters who sits with him.

Melly · 25/02/2002 15:49

Alibubbles - was refreshing to read your message about how old your children were when you potty trained them. I know it is quite a personal thing and the current trend seems to be not starting before the age of 2. I am keen to potty train my dd at about 18 months or possibly a bit earlier. So far can't find any support, in particular my SIL who has twins says 15-18 months is far too early, interestingly, her dd was well aware at the age of 17 months and on occasions told her that she needed a poo. Mum didn't respond and started potty training her only last week (26 months) and has had a horrendous time and reverted back to nappies - do you think she maybe missed an opportunity?

Lindy · 25/02/2002 16:57

I think you will have to look at some of the older style childcare books for how to train at a younger age (Dr Spock/Truby King etc). Someone I know has started to train her son at 17 months, reasonably successfully ie: he 'performs' when he is put on the potty.

Good luck whatever you decide and don't be put off because it's not 'fashionable' to train at this age, if that is what you want to do. I am sure most of us of a 'certain age' were trained when we were quite young compared to the trend nowadays.

Lindy · 25/02/2002 16:57

I think you will have to look at some of the older style childcare books for how to train at a younger age (Dr Spock/Truby King etc). Someone I know has started to train her son at 17 months, reasonably successfully ie: he 'performs' when he is put on the potty.

Good luck whatever you decide and don't be put off because it's not 'fashionable' to train at this age, if that is what you want to do. I am sure most of us of a 'certain age' were trained when we were quite young compared to the trend nowadays.

Lindy · 25/02/2002 16:58

Sorry - clicked twice!

Melly · 25/02/2002 22:02

Lindy thanks for that. I feel much better now about starting to potty train DD earlier than most. I will try to get hold of the books you mention. Maybe the incentive for our mothers was greater i.e no disposable nappies etc! Certainly my SIL said that she found nappies so convenient and that having to put aside a week or so where she didn't go out much whilst potty training was "so restricting".... doesn't sound like a reason for delaying though.....oh well each to their own. I have a while to go before my DD will be 17 months and I might well end up having to eat a large slice of humble pie if I get it wrong.

jessi · 25/02/2002 22:57

Melly,what about the research that looked into children potty trained too early with damaging psychological effects? Can I ask why you are so keen to do it so early?

Pupuce · 26/02/2002 10:31

Jessi - why don't you ask your mum when she potty trained you ?
Alibubbles is right IMO - we tend to leave it to very late so as to make it (hopefully- but not necessarily) easier on ourselves.
I would have potty trained DS at 19 MO but didn't becasue number 2 was due a few days later.

jessi · 26/02/2002 13:01

Pupace, of course I know when my mum potty trained me (I was 2 3/4 years). I think it drove her abit mad as I had no interest in it for ages, but when I did,it went quite well. I just thought there were developmental/psychological reasons as to why parents should wait until their child is ready to give it a go, that's all.I'll get my coat as I'm not even on this stage yet!

bundle · 26/02/2002 13:10

my 20 m/o 'rehearses' going on her potty, including putting toys in it, piling up sheets of loo roll in it & sitting on it (it's one of those chair-shaped ones which is quite stable) - fully-clothed of course. the carers at her nursery say this kind of rehearsal is common, but it doesn't necessarily mean they're ready to give it a go for real. my dd certainly isn't.

Lindy · 26/02/2002 13:33

Melly - will be interested to hear how you get on with your DD if you don't mind sharing her progress with us.

Melly · 26/02/2002 15:54

oh dear, don't want to start war about potty training, as I said before, it is a v. personal choice. I will be following my instincts but not caving in to peer pressure either way. Lindy - would be happy to share my DD's progress with anyone interested, although she has a way to go yet as only 7 months!

Lindy · 26/02/2002 21:43

Stick to your guns Melly, before I had a baby I never realised how much other people would 'interfere' with your decisions in how you want to bring up your child - always 'pleased' to have some sort of medical report to prove the opposite to what you want to do! As we all know, statistics can be manipulated to prove or disprove anything.

Bringing up a child is the most emotive subject I have ever come across; being an older mum I have bags of confidence and usually let other peoples comments wash over me!

Rozzy · 27/02/2002 00:27

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Chelle · 27/02/2002 03:48

Christopher Green has some interesting advice/anecdotes on toilet training in Toddler Taming. He also includes physiological reasons why some children are better to be left until older whereas others may be started much earlier. We are still in the throes of toilet training ds (2 years and 8 months) so I can't claim success as yet but the information he provides is more than just someone's opinion.

Good luck to all brave toilet trainers!!

bloss · 27/02/2002 08:54

Message withdrawn

CAM · 27/02/2002 20:42

Melly I like your view of noticing when the child is ready and grabbing the opportunity when it presents itself. This is what I did with dd and she "did it herself" at 18 months because I worked WITH her, not for her. She has to date (now aged 5 years) never had a wet bed or daytime accident.

Melly · 28/02/2002 21:00

Thanks everyone for your support, it's good to know I'm not alone in my views. Cam, interesting to hear about your DD....good for you, I hope I am just as successful when the time comes.

Jessi - in response to your question about why I wanted to start "so early".....I don't actually think 18 months is too early, but that is my own personal opinion. I'm sure there are some children who perhaps aren't ready at that age. In the case of my SIL, she is always telling everyone how forward her DD twin is and proudly demonstrates this by getting her to recite her name and address....only trouble is she can also tell mum that she needs a poo and afterwards that she done a poo in her nappy, but mum finds it a tad too inconvenient to deal with yet as it would restrict her getting out and about and lunching with friends! Each to their own, as long as no-one interferes when the time comes for me to train my dd, I'm not that bothered.

Bozza · 28/02/2002 21:22

My DS was one last week and I was thinking about training him towards the back end of the summer. August/September time so that he will be 18/19 months. I think it will probably be less stressful in the summer - can wear fewer clothes, easier to dry any extra washing etc and don't really want to wait until May/June next year. When the time comes though I might back off. So Melly you will have to keep us posted with how it goes.

Lindy · 28/02/2002 22:29

Bozza - my son is 1 next week so ours are about the same age - I was almost thinking I would have to wait for next year but your comments have inspired me. I'd always heard that boys were more difficult than girls to train.

Shall we go for it and share comments etc?

CAM · 01/03/2002 14:31

Have you put a potty in the bathroom so that your child can see it and you can mention it in a very low-key, unemotional way. I happened to have a little board book for my child with a picture of "hippo" sitting on the potty and she wanted to copy. She realised that the potty was a "toilet" easily by 18 months and when she asked to go on it (using baby language, obviously) I also put her on the proper loo as well so that she could use all loos when out. I didn't fancy carrying the potty around everywhere I went if she had only got attached to that!

Bozza · 03/03/2002 10:49

Yes Lindy that would be great, assuming neither of us chickens out between now and then.... I have bought a potty and put it in the bathroom. He has actually done a poo in it but that was totally unintentional on my part. A case of stood naked in the bathroom and started straining - either the carpet or the potty.... I think over the summer I might get the books out of the library as Cam suggests. Good idea about using toilet as well as potty - must bear that in mind.