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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

DD2 is tiny, feeling a bit sad for her, tell me some stuff to cheer me up

57 replies

jassinkernow · 04/07/2011 14:39

DD2 is 2.9mths and 81cm tall. This puts her quite a bit below the 0.4th centile in her red book (she was just below at her 2yr check). I'm on the small side, as are my other 2 children, but based on this she's really little. I know it's not the worst thing in the world, but I also know it's not much fun being the smallest in your class. She's a pretty rubbish eater at the moment - grounds for hope when she improves, do you think?

OP posts:

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winnybella · 04/07/2011 14:43

Tbh I don't recall my short classmates having any problems because of it. She might shoot up later or she might stay small, but I really don't think it's a problem.

Lancelottie · 04/07/2011 14:51

Actually, what tends to happen at school is that lots of the other girls fuss and 'mother' the smallest in the class (great for some personalities, not for others), whereas the biggest girls are expected to act their size not their age.

drivingmisscrazy · 04/07/2011 14:59

my dd is also tiny at 2.5. I don't think there's much point in worrying about it - mine eats well(ish), but has one granny under 5 foot and most of the women in the extended family are small too. She is lively, and growing (finally we are up to 4.5 size shoes!) and happy - she has started to learn strategies 'don't push me!' to cope with her diminutive size. She is (rightly) wary of groups of (to me) giant toddlers, but more than happy one on one, or with a smaller group of children. But she is weeny. Bless.

Original poster

jassinkernow · 04/07/2011 15:11

Thank you all! Drivingmisscrazy that made me smile - we're in 4.5 shoes too, spent many a frustrating afternoon trying to get her some proper walking shoes before we hit the holy grail of size 4.
People do fuss over DD2, even her peers. She very blonde and cherubic, and extremely bossy. I know being small has lots of advantages too, think I just need to belt up a bit and be grateful that I haven't got better things to worry about...

OP posts:

drivingmisscrazy · 04/07/2011 16:19

well yes, there is that. Plus the fact that everyone thinks she is a genius because she seems like a walking, talking 18 month old. This must be good for her self-esteem. I am just grateful that she isn't a boy, as there is no positive word for a small man - at least our DDs will be petite and will be able to shock people with the size of their personalities (DD telling a fly to 'go away and get out!')

the shoe thing was a total PITA - although continental shoe manufacturers seem to start proper shoes at small sizes.

SootySweepandSue · 04/07/2011 17:00

I was always the smallest and loved it as I was always the cutest too

She sounds like she has a lot of personality so I am sure she will be fine especially if she has areas she is able to be 1st in.

suzikettles · 04/07/2011 17:03

My neice, just turned 3, is weeny too. She gets loads of positive attention because of it (as pp said people think she's a genius because they assume she's younger!).

She is cute as a button, bossy, smart and has no trouble keeping up with her older and much bigger brother.

Good things come in small packages!

Galena · 04/07/2011 20:08

DD is 2y3m and still wearing 9-12 month clothes... She's still only a 3.5 shoe size. Poor thing's going to have plenty to cope with - not only will she be small, but she also has mild cerebral palsy. Never mind, she'll cope!

changeforthebetter · 04/07/2011 20:15

DD1 is small (tiny feet, can still squeeze into 2-3 clothes) and I have had oh so many tedious comments since she was a baby from mothers about "how little/dinky/wee she is" the implication being that she was a runt, basically and that anyone who doesn't hit the 90th centile is a weakling

She was IUGR so I am just glad she came out basically OK. I did a lot to try and increase her physical confidence (swimming, footy, gym etc). I never let her play the pity-me card, just tell her she is fab and strong. Actually she is starting to catch up height-wise with her class now at age 6. However, she remains wonderfully slim unlike some of her taller (and podgier) classmates. I think the same mums will be rather envious in a few years time

Oh and the thing about small for age is that they do seem smart to those not in the know (I know that is unfair on tall-for-age kids )

NotJoiningIn · 04/07/2011 20:26

My DD is very tall already (7 months) and in 12-18 month clothes and I am already dealing with people thinking she is older and more able than she is (oh, can't she wave yet? etc). My friend's DD is tiny tiny like your DD, OP, and seems much the same size as my DD at 2.9 years. And everyone thinks she is very smart and cute!

kickingking · 04/07/2011 20:34

I think I was about that size at that age. I know I was under 100cm when I started school at 5 . I found being mistaken for being much younger than I was annoying, but overall I would rather have been small than tall.

I did grow to 'normal' height range, I'm 5'1" now. Being mistaken for being younger than I am is a lovely experience now!

I used to teach a little girl (age 7) who was very, very small for her age. She was, of course, pigeon holed as 'cute' but was also one of the feistiest girls I've ever come across. She's 16 now quite a bit smaller than me, and still feisty!

drivingmisscrazy · 04/07/2011 21:01

one further big upside to DD being small (although usually acknowledged to be very pretty...) is that she will not be tall enough to be a model with all the crap and issues that entails even if she wanted to...

I was tiny as a small child too (DD is not my biological child) predicted not to make 5 feet - I am about 5'2" and not the elfin frame of my childhood, alas

suzikettles · 04/07/2011 21:06

Oh, and I was tiny when I was preschool. My mum has some of the dresses I wore as a toddler and they look like doll's clothes. Even my niece didn't fit into them at the same age.

Anyway, I'm 5' 6" now. Not tall, but not short either.

youbethemummylion · 04/07/2011 21:52

"I am just grateful that she isn't a boy, as there is no positive word for a small man"

Oh dear I came here looking for some cheering up for myself having just discovered DS2 is just below 0.4th centile at 14 months!

GrimmaTheNome · 04/07/2011 21:58

mummylion - my DD was always the smallest girl in her class at juniors but there were two boys who were smaller. They both had enormous characters - one got the acting trophy in yr6 and the other was the star athlete who could outrun and outjump everyone, even the beanpoles.

menazovut · 04/07/2011 21:58

I was the shortest/ lightest girl in my 9 form entry high school in year 7. I'm now 5'9

I have a 14 month old now who's a bit lost in 6-9 month clothes. I'm not worried as late growth is a family trait but I get sick of the comments on his size.

My solution has been to be-friend other mums with tiny ones! Together they fit, it's so funny when their average/ large sized friends play with them. DS is the oldest out of our lot, but is around shoulder height to others.

MogTheForgetfulCat · 04/07/2011 22:06

mummylion - my DS2 is v dinky also, now (at 3.4) noticeably smaller than his peers, than most 2yos we know etc. Could also have done without the fatuous comments about "petite" DDs as opposed to "no positive word for a small man" DSs. Thanks for that .

NumptyMum · 04/07/2011 22:20

On the converse side, my DS is quite tall for his age (nearly 4) which has given us some problems as actually he's still catching up with his language/social development - I think kids and adults think he's older than he is. My DH was tall as a child and older kids in the school used to seek him out to 'prove' themselves on him... I guess the best we can do is to help our kids find a way of dealing with unwanted attention, whether it is because they are small, big, wear specs etc. With any luck they will work out their own strategy (acting, being the clown, being the person who will help others).

RandomMess · 04/07/2011 22:23

Life has been much easier for my small for age dd than her siblings that were very tall for their ages.

campergirls · 04/07/2011 22:23

So what is the positive term for a small man, mummylion?

youbethemummylion · 04/07/2011 22:26

hang on a minute I too was upset by the comment I quoted it wasn't me that said it it was another poster further up the thread!!!

NormanTebbit · 04/07/2011 22:31

My DD2 is also tiny. She is 4.5 and still wears size 7 shoes. My friends 2.5 year old toddler is the same height.

She is a great dancer and very clever. She is a fighter too - nursery say she gives back whatever she gets and more.

I am very proud of her.

drivingmisscrazy · 04/07/2011 22:34

apologies - I didn't mean to upset anyone, truly. All I meant was that I think it is probably harder to be small if you are a boy. Having said that, the smallest boy in my school was the one that had the toughest reputation - he was brilliant at judo. And I'm not mad about the term 'petite' either (which I meant to put in quotes) - I think it is generally rather patronising. But I can't think of a male equivalent Sorry again. Fatuous is probably about right.

choccyp1g · 04/07/2011 22:37

The male equivalent is "Pocket Hercules".

fuckmepinkandCALLmegoran · 04/07/2011 22:43

My DD2 is tiny. She's 9 and wears age 4-5 clothes.

She won the sports cup at school on sports day for the best girl performance overall in the whole school - first in the sprint, first in the "long" race, first in the sack race and second in the obstacle course.

It won't hold her back I promise you

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