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Support thread for speech and laguage delay toddlers...

481 replies

Orangeflower7 · 10/05/2011 21:07

Hi, I have a little boy of 2.5 and we have just today had our first speech and language referral appointment as he is not saying many words yet. I thought maybe other parents might be in the same position and would like to share experiences for support?

It took a few weeks for the appointment, which we were referred to by the health visitor. The therapist told us he has a moderate language delay and has given us ideas of some signs to use with him, she has advised us to keep language clear and simple and we will get a place at a toddler group run by speech and language therapists who will observe and support us. Not sure how long that will take as they only have 6 children in a group but there is an option we can go to the next town if necessary. He also had his hearing tested by the hospital audiologist last week and they said his hearing was fine.

OP posts:
Bellagio · 14/07/2011 22:31

just marking, back later to post!

alew · 14/07/2011 23:34

Hi all. My dd is 3, and has a hearing age of 7 months, she says 5 words/phrases in total, usually in a specific context of a particular game or other. We have been signing with her for the past 8 months, which has help her behaviour amazingly (she now has a strop when you sign no, which is frustrating but at least we know she can understand us).
She talks to herself all the time in her own gibberish, and I'm sure that that she thinks she is having a perfectly normal conversation.
She's not really interested in other children.
And I find it hard sometimes to explain to people that although she is a toddler she can't understand any more than a 7 month old baby.
Anyways. Hi all.

lucilastic · 15/07/2011 10:29

Just bumping this up. alew, I didn't know you could have a hearing age.

Tabitha8 · 15/07/2011 14:17

DS chatters to us but nothing makes any sense. No recongnisable words. I find it hard to know how to respond to him. It isn't like a baby babbling. He seems to be fine with other children.

He's started using his Makaton with other people now and I have to translate for him. Bless Smile.

I haven't heard of a "hearing age" either.

alew · 15/07/2011 21:22

Hi. lucilastic, their hearing age is measured from when they could hear (aided, grommits, or implanted CI), it isn't always the same as their actual age.
As my dd was born deaf, (the audiologists have only just figured out how she passed her newborn screenings), she was 2.5yrs when she got her aids, which was December, which gives her a Hearing age of 7.5 months.
Basically anything before that time is disregarded as she didn't have access to sound.
So her speech and understanding of speech goes on the length of time she has been hearing. So she understands as much speech as a 7month old.

(I also find it's more positive to say than "she has a speech and language delay of 2 and a half years" which always seems so negative.)

wobblypig · 16/07/2011 23:20

Hi Can I join in? Am very concerned about dd 2.2. Says ' mamma/dadda/nanna/ ello' and that's about it. She had tongue tie but it was snipped at 10 days. Her brother 4 is so chatty and has a wide vocab. I have just wrangled a SALT referral and hearing assessemnt out of a very laid back GP.
Just really want to be able to talk to her now - and for her to stop the grunting and pointing.

Gymbob · 16/07/2011 23:35

Hi, my DD is also deaf, we presume from birth although she wasn't diagnosed until 3.5 years. Obviously, she has speech and language delay too, as she had limited access to sound until 3.5 years. She also passed the screenings, although newborn testing wasn't available when she was born over 12 years ago. Her speech and language is still not of her chronological age, I doubt it ever will be.

alewVera · 17/07/2011 16:59

My dd passed her newborn screening. Well I say she did, but technically she didn't. 1st one picked up an abnormal reading, 2nd on, the did her " better" ear 1st, got a response as she can hear one frequency at a mild loss (the other frequencies have a higher loss), she then woke up as they did her 2nd ear, thus "passing" on her profoundly deaf side due to the HVs ignorance.
wobblypig have you thought about using basic signs with her?

wobblypig · 17/07/2011 23:48

My daughter sings and dances along to music which I have always thought a good sign. Really kicking myself for leaving this so long. Didn't know hte hearing assessments could be falsely reassuring.

katster37 · 18/07/2011 14:51

Can I join? My DS is nearly 20 months and doesn't say much at all in comparison to peers. He talks gibberish all the time but only actually says 'owl' (?!) 'cheese', 'yeah', 'no'. I am 'ma', dad is 'da'. He says 'dirdie' for bird, and 'doddy' for dog. Do these sound like a sign of a deeper problem, that he gets his consonants muddled? I am so worried. He calls his baby brother (Harry) 'Arra' and cant ever get the end 'y' sound. The annoying thing is, he THINKS he is talking to me, but gets frustrated when I don't understand. I don't know what to do. His 'friend' is nearly two and says all sorts, full sentences, explanations, questions. And whenever we play at their house I feel like I have the 'thick' child, alhtough the other child is three months older. Each month I think, oh well next month he'll be saying more...Would you recommend HV 9they seem useless) or gp?

omnishambles · 18/07/2011 14:56

My dd (3.2) has speech delay - not language though, the SALT said she was just at the end of the normal range and not to worry but then her hearing test came back as a loss of hearing in both ears and so we are waiting on an ENT consult. I assume grommets and adenoids out and then we will see.

I suppose what I am saying is that I wish I had done it earlier and pushed a bit harder. I knew her hearing wasn't right.

Katster - you go to your HV and lay it on with a trowel and then they will get you a SALT appt and a hearing test - ours took 15 weeks though.

alewVera · 18/07/2011 17:35

Katster there could be the possibility that DC is not hearing these sounds. if you are worried get a referral and don't get fobbed off with the "they all develop at different rates", better to be referred and find out nothing is wrong, than not and regret it later.

What I never knew is that deaf children (including profoundly) babble, make speech sounds, (dd said daddy and where : Pre-diagnosis) then turn at (some) loud noises, they can sense when someone comes into a room or moves behind them, they feel footsteps through the flooring, their other senses are heightened to compensate. DD dances to music, and watches tv.

ewaczarlie · 19/07/2011 11:44

didnt get through the whole tread so someone may have already mentioned this but check out this theory of intelligence. I very much support it and believe that this is why we all develop differently. My 2yo son is also poor talker and i've been very stressed by it (especially since i speak 3 languages and want him to learn at least 1 other than English while he's young). so when i get stressed i just refer back to this and it helps calm me down. I may not have a mathematician or a writer but given his physical strengths maybe a future olympian lol check it out professorlamp.com/ed/TAG/7_Intelligences.html

Tabitha8 · 19/07/2011 16:58

DS is also very physical. Always has been. Smile
He can hear perfectly welll when I whisper to him, so that's a good thing.

lucilastic · 19/07/2011 18:32

Tabitha8, that's how I was sure DD wasn't deaf. She can hear the word "treat" or "sweeties" spoken at normal volume from upstairs! She definately has selective deafness.

Tabitha8 · 19/07/2011 18:37

Yep, that rings a bell, too! Grin.

wobblypig · 21/07/2011 23:47

After pushing my GP and HV I got a questionnaire sent throught the post. It bascially suggests that even if DD is not talking that if she makes eye contact and role plays she does nto need referral. Thsi doesn't take into consideration my cocnerns about her hearing or tongue tie with regard to speaking.

What should I do ?

lucilastic · 22/07/2011 12:00

My DD (3 next month) makes good eye contact and plays imaginatively all the time but has severe language delay. We turned down a Paed assessment a couple of months ago as I was convinced she'd be making significant progress by now. We're now at the bottom of the waiting list. TBH I'm terrified it's autism. I feel guilty and awful now.

wobblypig, ask your GP for a referral to a community paed doctor. They are the only ones who can properly assess your daughter. Push for it hard.
Good luck.

theDudesmummy · 29/07/2011 13:51

Hi all, this thread slipped down a bit so I am resurrecting it again. My DS had his grommets put in last week, which went fine. I have not really noticed any change in speech/behaviour yet but maybe it is too early to tell. The surgeon did say that he aspirated quite a lot of thick fluid out of both ears, so it would, he said, certainly have been affecting his hearing. I suppose I am just being impatient, but feel rather frustrated that he is still not talking.

JoshuasMummy2008 · 29/07/2011 15:00

Hi, I'm so glad I've seen this support thread. My little boy is 2.8yrs and is saying very little. We have seen the HV and she's referred him for speech therapy. His favourite word is 'hiya' which is uses alot, he can say around 10-15 words but some of them are not clear. If he wants something he can say 'this' and points at what he wants. We have started to do our own sign language to get by, otherwise he gets frustrated as I don't know what he's saying.

I was hoping to start potty training but it's not really going well! But just today we were at the library and he came up to me and waved his hand in front of his nose - that means it smells! I was sooo pleased! :o
It's heartbreaking at times.

We got to the local playgroups - and when I hear other children his age talking away to each other it really upsets me.
I haven't read all the the replies yet, but I will once DS goes to bed later!
x

theDudesmummy · 29/07/2011 17:12

Yes my little boy is starting to get frustrated that we don't understand him, he doesn't point (which of course worries me immensely) but he does bring things to you and also take your hands and put them on what he wants done (like putting a book in your hand if he wants it read, or pushing your fingers on the pushchair buckle if he wants to get out). I just wish he would make things easier for all of us and say something instead! He gets so cross when we don't get what he is trying to convey.

It can be very heartbreaking at times, as Joshua'smummy said. Especially when other children his age are chatting away (and I have to hear my mother telling me about DS's cousin, who is a couple of months younger than him, lives in a different country and we have not met him yet) talking in sentences. I get rather despondant at times.

BessieBooPooBum · 30/07/2011 08:45

Hi, I was JoshuasMummy2008 but had name change! Just a quick question - how long did you have to wait for your appointment for speech therapy? We saw the HV about 4 weeks ago and hoping it will come thru soon! thanks

theDudesmummy · 30/07/2011 10:31

I am seeing her privately so we got pretty quick appointments. I don't know what the general situation is with the NHS though, sorry.

lingle · 30/07/2011 20:08

Hi Bessiepoobumbum

My boys were at comparable stages at that age.

I think it's great you're using a "sign language". My speech therapist said that visual cues are not an alternative to talking, they're like a scaffold that your child needs to climb up.

Whilst you're waiting for the speech therapy appointment, I'd recommend you get hold of a copy of a great and very non-scary positive book called "It Takes Two to Talk" at this point published by the charity Hanen. www.hanen.org or available cheaper from winslow publications or order it from your library if you really can't afford it. But I suspect you'll find it money well spent. It is mercifully free of milestone charts, pessimistic anecdotes, discussions of syndromes and the like.

hollysmam · 30/07/2011 21:43

Hi everybody, Im new to Mumsnet but I am so glad I have found this thread to know that me and DH are not alone as we both have days where it all seems like it will never happen :( . My little girl is 3 and a half and not talking at all. She has just started to say Daddy (Daddoo) and using ByeBye appropriately. This last week she has started to copy more and more sounds like musical sounds or me making silly noises. She has been seeing SALT off and on for about a year. The way they do it where I live you have an initial assessment in clinic (where she just kept trying to open the door and leave!!) and since then we have 4-6 week blocks once a week every few months at home. In the middle of one of those right now. She has had hearing checked twice, now waiting for the third one as each time the result has been 'inconsistent', tho they did tell me she can hear the frequencies she needs for speech. She saw paediatrician before Xmas where we answered endless questions about her then in May she had a Ruth Griffiths assessment, the results of which were not surprising but depressing to see it in black and white!! :( Next step for her now is school, she will start in September mornings only and luckily the school have been really supportive. They have arranged (along with HV and SALT) for her to be seen by educational psychologist quite soon after they start, as the concern now is that there may be more to her delayed speech ie ASD. It may be then she will have to go to a special referral unit for autistic children or that she stays in school with additional help. We are in total limbo. She is obviously not potty trained and as some earlier posts mentioned, dont even know where we will start with that one! Luckily again school have been very supportive of my concerns in advance and advised to put her in PullUps and take it from there..... Im really sorry Ive rambled on for so long but sometimes it helps to write all these things down so make it clearer in your head!! As I mentioned before Im just glad to know we're not alone and other people are having similar problems. Thanks for 'listening'.