Support thread for speech and laguage delay toddlers...

[Orangeflower7]

Hi, I have a little boy of 2.5 and we have just today had our first speech and language referral appointment as he is not saying many words yet. I thought maybe other parents might be in the same position and would like to share experiences for support?

It took a few weeks for the appointment, which we were referred to by the health visitor. The therapist told us he has a moderate language delay and has given us ideas of some signs to use with him, she has advised us to keep language clear and simple and we will get a place at a toddler group run by speech and language therapists who will observe and support us. Not sure how long that will take as they only have 6 children in a group but there is an option we can go to the next town if necessary. He also had his hearing tested by the hospital audiologist last week and they said his hearing was fine.

Orangeflower ? no, it's not the same as wax. My DS also has waxy ears but it's not deemed an issue as wax will generally come out in its own time (the eardrops will soften it). I don't think they would syringe a young child (is very unpleasant).

Glue ear is actually a build-up of sticky fluid in the middle ear (between eardrum and inner ear, so can't be seen) and it causes a drop in volume of sound, basically. This page is good and clear: www.patient.co.uk/health/Glue-Ear.htm

Gotobed ? it can only be diagnosed with a proper audiological test which measures both hearing and pressure in the ear. It can occur after ear infections so if you are concerned it's worth getting your DD referred via GP or HV.

Gotobed - sorry, I didn't answer your last Q - it's encouraging there were no issues at her newborn test but yes, hearing issues can develop at any time so if you don't think she is hearing well (or you want a problem ruled out) it's definitely a good idea to get the referral.

Sorry, I know I am sounding like an expert, am not, just that I am hard of hearing so lots of experience of audiology and also my son is on the hearing test treadmill!

Thanks musicmaiden, that's really helpful!
I personally don't think she has a hearing problem, but dp thinks she fiddles with her ears alot when they go swimming & with the speech delay I think it could definitely be worth checking out.

She seems to me to have more 'selective' hearing. If we're offering her something she likes she seems to hear so much better than when we're asking her to sit down & eat her dinner nicely for example!
Today she told me had done a poo for the 1st time ever - I nearly cried!

How old is she gotobed? I would love DD to indicate she's filled her nappy either in words, actions or deeds?
How the hell am I going to ever potty train her? She's 3 in August.

Hi again Luci just out of interest in what you said about potty training could you just leave her nappy /pullups off a bit when in nicer weather eg in the garden pehaps, my ds suprised me by hopping up on the toilet and having a go, after showing no interest in the potty at all and not talking either...

Just got the report through from the SALT, says has significant language delay although understanding good. The nursery is being helpful too and going to speak to the SALT and their advisory teacher person hmm just hope all picks up a bit and all not needed...thanks for writing it is good to hear from others in the same boat! Am off to try and watch the dvd which comes with that book now. (if ds will let me instead of Thomas)

Will try that suggestion Orange. If I ask her if she's done a poo 9 times out of 10 she says no when she has!
She greeted me at nursery today with an almost perfect "hello" today.

So glad to find this thread today. My son is 28 months old and I thought his speech was quite good, slower than his sisters was but he does have quite a few words. He has slowed down a little lately and only uses a few 2 word phrases, all gone, etc but when I picked him up from nursery today the teacher said she thought he needed to be referred for sp & language help. She says she does understand some of the words he says - hello, bye, bye, milk, juice, water, mammy, daddy, etc but a lot of it is just babble and words they really don't understand.
I'm gutted, I honestly didn't think he had a problem. My DH is being very unhelpful too and asking if he means DS is going to be 'thick' have ADHD, Autism, etc...all of which I have lost my temper at! What stupid questions! I am upset that I hadn't picked itup myself and feel to blame for being in this position.
Are they any suggestions of what we can do at home to help while we wait to be seen? I do always repeat things back to him, read him stories, try to get him to repeat new words, etc...just not sure what else to do to help improve the situation.

Hi
Everyones DC are a bit older than my DS but me & my DP are starting to get concerned :(
He will be 1 in 2 weeks and we have no noises. Other than a cry. He has ALOT of other health problems - failure to thrive,so has gastrostomy, Large atrial septal defect, slow physical development - still not sitting or doing pushups on tummy, VERY noisy breathing, to name a few.
We saw S&L when he was about 8 weeks old as he wasnt drinking from a bottle properly and his weight was on 0.4th percentile for a long time which is why he now has a gastrostomy tube in as he still hasnt taken to a bottle properly.
The S&L was suppose to help us to get him to feed but she didn't think there was much she could do so she discharged us. I did ring her as i was begining to get concerned a few months ago as he hadn't laughed and would sit mute all day. She suggested going to a baby sign group but due to me having a DD who has only just turned 2 and not being able to drive it wouldn't have been possible for me to take him. Our DS physio has spoke to the S&L lady and she is going to come back out to see us on friday to see if she can help us to get him to start babbling.
I feel my DS problems are down to some form of brain damage :( he is having an MRI scan soon to look into CP. He finds things very hard to understand. Its quite heart breaking to watch him & not be able 2 get any response off him. Only thing that keeps me going is that he smiles at me so i know hes happy.

welcome Hayley, I hope the MRI scan will give you some answers.

Have you discovered the mumsnet special needs board? I 'lived" on it for about two and a half years and don't know what I would have done without it.

Welcome Hayley. I echo what lingle says. I imagine things will be easier to deal with when you have more idea what the medical issues are.

I have been worried on and off about ASD with DD since she turned 2, the age her elder sibling's speech took off. It's true she does have some quirky behaviour but she doesn't displayt any of the red flags for autism bar the quite significant speech delay and lack of interest in peers.
It does annoy me when people say "oh she's normal. It's JUST speech delay. Maybe it is but not being able to talk is quite a problem in itself and will become a bigger problem if she can't catch up before she starts school.
Am so glad to find this thread as my RL family and friends are tired of me banging on about my worries.

Lucilastic, my dd is 2.4. I imagine the nappy thing was a one off! And I had left her to cry it out in her cot at nap time (which I NEVER do) so it was her way of proving a point I think!
Aderyn if it's any consolation your ds sounds like he is doing better than mine. I avoid asking daycare what they think as I'm a bit frightened of the answer. I did hear a much smaller toddler say a very clear 'mummy' to her mum today which made me feel rather
I feel a bit stuck between burying my head in the sand on the one hand, and over analysing things on the other.

Hi sorry just wanted to say hi to all new people...Gotobead, Bellagio, Dudesmummy, Adelyn, Hayley..sorry hope got most of you am not so good at scrolling back and forth and remembering names. Here's hoping our little ones get on ok with their speech. I was thinking today hoping I wasn't making others more anxious talking about my own worries about ds' speech, it would be a shame if we all worried so much it came across to them wouldn't it. Just thought would mention the main things that seemed to be helpful to try from the SALT for our ds (2.5) were to speak clearly simple words, use simple signs just one or two to start (the ones from cbeebies/makaton) and from the book I got, anyway yes mine loves the Justin Mr tumble stuff too and tries to talk to him! Well it's a start!

AderynMelyn - I just wanted to say don't worry yourself about not picking up on it. You spend more time with your DS than most so you probably don't have much trouble understanding him compared to others. And if you're not with other little ones your DS's age how would you know really if he was 'behind'? Honestly, now you know, seek some help but try not to worry or see it as a failure on your part - as you can see from this thread so many of us are going through similar. Your husband is not being helpful but TBH it's not an unusual reaction for some member of family to say 'there's nothing wrong/he'll do it in his own time/are you trying to say he's thick' type thing. Ignore, ignore.

The book It Takes Two to Talk published by Winslow here will give some suggestions as to help your little one off.

Hayley Just wanted to send some support really. I hope you get some answers soon so your LO can be helped.

As for my (20mo) DS, I spent time in the park with my NCT group today and their kids. They are his peers and yet all seem so much more advanced than him, running round madly, talking in mini sentences etc. DS was a late walker too so is not yet physically confident and with no speech either he seems so far behind them. I just can't imagine him talking at the moment, we seem so far from that point. I am wondering if he has a general developmental delay and how likely it is he will just 'do it in his own time'.

Hayley, I wonder this about my DD. Is it just delayed speech or something more? I have my worries in check mostly but when we go to toddler groups and I compare her with her peers or kids younger than her I start freaking out again.

She is not interested in other children (she's 2.10 yrs) and spends a lot of time at groups running around shouting happily, lying on the floor and talking gibberish to herself. She will sit down for snacks with everyone else and does play appropriately with toys. She loves dolls/soft toys and likes to "talk" to them and put them to bed saying "night night" etc.
Do people think her social skills are delayed because of her speech delay?
She does respond well to her name, understands everything, asks for drinks etc but there is no getting away from the fact she's a loner and likes to play alone.

Thanks ladies. Think it came as a bit of a shock to me on Tuesday. I work full time but was able to pick him up for a change! I hadn't asked anything about his speech, was just talking in general about how he was settling in and they did say they were having trouble understanding everything. Funnily enough, I started to make a list of all the words he can say clearly now and of course the ones that aren't so clear.
I did speak to a SALT today and she suggested modelling talk, playing with him and saying 2 to 3 word sentences. It is something we do naturally and now it seems a little forced. I'm sure it will help though, there is currently a 10 week waiting list for him to be assessed properly so I'm hoping if we carry on playing and modelling, we'll see some huge improvements in the next few months.

Thanks all for you comments :) I have been chatting to a few people on the special needs board. Is nice to have ppl in the same boat who understand what your going thru.
We had our first SALT session on friday. She was really nice & helpful. Has told us to take DS to the baby sign classes & she is going to start to do regular home visits as she said there are so many gaps in his development which we need to fill in b4 we can even start thinking about getting him to speak. She said he appears to have very little understanding of the world hes in :( Horrible to hear bt i no its true.
Has anyone had any experience of the baby sign classes? Me & DP don't really see how they will help but im sure if SALT say they do i should go along & see how they go.

Wow, it has taken me so long to get back to this thread and there are 20 of us on here!
It's so great to know that we're not facing these issues alone.
I am a bit ashamed of the time I've taken to reply so I've had a good read through all your posts.
Orangeflower7 thanks for starting this much needed thread. I am a tiny bit ahead of you but our circumstances are very similar. My ds is also 2.5, diagnosed significant speech delay and we are now 3 weeks into our "chatterbugs" group which is run by the SALT. I'm finding it quite helpful, it's not busy so lots of opportunity for input from the therapist and her assistants. I hope you get news of your group starting soon.
Whomovedmychocolate, Lingle and marioandluigi thanks so much for sharing all your good advice and reassuring success stories.
Lucilastic your posts also resonated with me. I sooo want to hear "mummy" and I'm at a complete loss as to how to even contemplate potty training! And I can identify with what you say about family and friends playing down your worries regarding "something else" eg. ASD
I think It's natural to have these fears. I also had reservations about signing but have very recently introduced a couple with great success, no words along with them yet though but quite helpful in certain situations (the one for "more" especially!)
BlueberryPancake that nursery sounds fantastic! You are lucky to have found it. My ds is also very into numbers, technology and puzzles as you and others have said.
BabyDubsEverywhere good to hear that you have had great success with the signing, I was apprehensive as I mentioned but I'm definitely coming round to the idea. Not sure I'd go as far as marrying Justin though ;-)
Chocjunkie good luck with the Paeds, hope they can give your dd some help/input, it's so hard.
Cinnamongreyhound hope the group goes well. That's interesting about the sound substitution, must be frustrating for him.
Fer1 I can relate to what you say about "forgetting" words. My ds is the same and also babbles a constant stream of nonsense! Hope your ds's hearing assessment goes well.
Summerrain I think we've "spoken" briefly before? I hope that your ds will now come on leaps and bounds now that the op has been done. It's good that you already have the SALT input. His is his feeding now? Are you finding the signing helpful too?
jigglebum that is interesting about your ds missing the syllables off, it must be frustrating. I hope the ENT dept can give him some help.
Chundle again I can relate to the "losing" words thing. I just don't get it sometimes. It's hard not to worry isn't it?
TheDudesmummy that seems good progress for your ds in a month,
hopefully he will carry on improving, good luck.
gotobedsleepyhead oh my, another fussy eater! I have one of those here! My ds is a nightmare, but hey, that's another thread entirely! I reckon the two things go together in some cases you know.
Lukeylou I hope you get your ds's SALT and hearing assessments done soon, the waiting is frustrating.
musicmaiden what are they planning to do for your ds's glue ear? I think babbling and pointing are both good signs.
8Ace it must be very hard to deal with two children with speech problems. What disorder does your dd have if you don't mind me asking? Is your ds being assessed for ASD? You must be very strong.
AderynMelyn I'm sure you know your ds better than anyone. A SALT assessment may help clear up any differences in opinion for the nursery though and then you can move on.
Hayley16 I'm sending lots of wishes and luck for your ds's forthcoming MRI, what a tough time you must be having. Stay strong.

Phew! I think that's everyone!
I'm really keen to keep this thread going and looking forward to getting to know you all better.

Bellagio.... we probably have 'talked' before, I've certainly mentioned ds2 plenty on MN. His feeding has improved hugely, although he's still on lidded cups. Food wise he manages most things. He's still not making a huge range of sounds but we have had a couple of new ones since the op. He also noticeably doesn't use his mouth quite the way he should but hopefully SALT will help with that, he hasn't been back yet since the op so she'll probably try a different tactic when we see her again. Signing has been the single biggest help, he was so frustrated before whereas now he can ask for what he wants so we don't have massive meltdowns 200 times a day anymore. It seems to have boosted his confidence loads too and he's become far better in social situations now and will actually play with other children and allow people to speak with him without crying. He actually wants to start playschool now whereas before he cried every time we were in the building (I'm on the committee so in and out weekly)

Hi I'm so glad there is a thread on here about this! My DS is 2yrs 3 months and altough he constantly chatters most of it is gibberish! Also leaves the last sound off a lot of words so many words sound the same which is frustrating for me and him! Thankyou everyone who has posted at least I now feel like it's not that unusual!

That all sounds really positive Summerrain hopefully your SALT will be able to give him some more pointers at his next appt. Interesting that you feel he doesn't move his mouth properly, I sometimes think that about my ds, he kind of grimaces sometimes, kind of like his jaws are wired IYKWIM ! I know he can move his mouth properly and I certainly know he can open it wide when he wants to scream blue murder ! My ds also uses lidded cups most if the time as he sometimes just doesn't "get" how to drink from an open cup. I probably haven't pushed this as much as I could though due to his fondness for making puddles with his drinks at every oportunity!
sarahlou welcome! let's hope we can all help each other out by sharing our stories.

Hi all, I'm glad I've found this thread! My DS is 2 yrs 10 months, and is currently having speech therapy. I knew there was a problem quite early on because although he made lots of sounds he didn't 'babble' at all, so when he was 15 months old I took him to a Sure Start group run by a speech therapist who agreed there was an issue. So at 2 the HV made a referral for SALT and he was seen every 3 months until a month ago when he started having weekly therapy.

I get very upset about it and it's a constant worry, particularly as I'm a lone parent and don't have anyone to share concerns with. But he is doing really well with the therapy. The main issue seems to be that he can only make vowel sounds so everything is 'a-a-a' but there have been some developments. He has started making 's' and 'f' sounds, and has started to use the correct amount of syllables for words, eg. "hello" is now "o-o". He has also started copying and mimicking, which he only started in the last few months and this is helping him too.

He is a very bright and interactive little boy, and understands everything, and so he sometimes gets quite frustrated when he can't make himself understood, and I feel terribly guilty. I also have concerns about him being left out by other children because he can't converse with them, so when he started nursery 2 days a week a couple of months ago I made the conscious decision to put him in a small open plan nursery. This way, there are babies and toddlers of all ages and he is able to seek out and play with children who can understand him or don't mind his speech, rather than be shut in a room for his age group where he might be left out. He is actually thriving at nursery, he is gentle with the babies and some of the older boys have taken him under their wing which is very sweet.

Sometimes I sit there and wonder what he's thinking, or what his voice would sound like if he could speak properly, things like that. I long to hear him say mummy and I hope, with the therapy, it will happen one day. It's nice to read other peoples stories and realise that I'm not alone!

Welcome Millie :) Glad to hear your DS is doing so well at nursery. We're currently looking at pre-schools for my DS for next year (he's a bit younger - 2.2 years), and although there is still loads of time for his speach to take off before he starts, I have been worrying about how he would cope of he's still behind. The fact your DS is thriving is so encouraging!

I totally understand your longing to hear him call you"Mummy". My DS was a much longed for, long awaited baby, and sometimes I feel that I'm never going to hear that wonderful word :(

Hi Millie,
it's great to have so many if us on board now

Well it's late and I'm a bit pissed tired nimbus just wanted to say how well the signing is going! I am amazed at the progress in just a few days, I reckon ds has mastered around 8 signs now, it's really coming on.
It's lovely for him to have a better way to get his point across. He loves doing them too, and was proudly showing them off to my friend and her dd (the love of ds's life!) earlier!
I'm just feeling so proud of the little man!
Night all

Oh god, sorry for spelling/autocorrect random words!
Must learn to proofread posts!

Hi All

Very interesting and helpful reading all your posts. I have DS 2.9 months who has severe speech and language delay and is awaiting a multi agency assessment at a child development centre - 2 days a week for 4 weeks (gulp!) He had grommits a year ago owing to no speech at all - hasn't been the great leap forward they expected - few more unclear words and professionals continue to refer to him as complex and ask what additional needs he has and what age he is operating at! (Ahhhh!) I just remember that in the midst of them attaching labels and terms there is my gorgeous, loving funny little boy who melts the hearts of all the old people in the wating rooms by giving them kisses!

Just wondered if any of you had contacted afasic - I have found them fab fab fab and our local support group has just ordered me the makaton parent pack which they are funding for us. Find it quite rubbish that I have to go to a charity to get the support as my SALT doesn't seem to be offering much. Wants me to introduce Makaton and then finds a course for £150 which me and DH then have to find cash for! But afasic have been extremely helpful.

Sorry if I sound like a moaner - I'm not (honest - OK well yeh if my DH talks about football one more time....) I just don't feel that I have been well supported by the NHS in some respects. Wondered how others feel they have been supported?

Well done if you got to the end of this little rant!!