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Support thread for women who are pregnant or TTC after a termination for abnormalities 2

1000 replies

LittlePoot · 05/07/2010 09:49

Dear all lovely ladies past, present and future. Welcome to support thread number two, to help us through the anxious TTC waiting, early scary weeks of pregnancy, nasty scans and tests, growing bumps and babies and everything in between. May this thread bring luck and (eventual) joy to us all and at least we'll all be here to hold eachothers' hands along the way. x

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LittlePoot · 24/09/2010 15:52

Oh coffee - that's just fantastic news! I'm so pleased for you. I've been logging on all day to check (sorry for not having time to say hi to anyone else in the meantime...) and I'm just so pleased that all is well. Enjoy cuddling your bump over the weekend. xxxx

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katiecubs · 24/09/2010 16:42

Super news Coffee am so happy for you!! I really hope you can relax and enjoy the pregnancy a little more now, have a lovely time at the wedding.

p.s boys are best Wink

Cantdothisagain · 24/09/2010 16:50

Yay!!!

And I LOVE the name Coffeebean. A little boy - fabulous. Oh it's so exciting to imagine another little boy for our thread... Gina - did you find out the sex or not?

Katie, you did everything possible for breastfeeding; sometimes it just doesn't work out. FWIW, my random observation is that boys seem to be harder to breastfeed - they seem to need more milk. But that's just based on the boy babies I know. And yes, the colostrum is the most important bit. Tell us more about him! is he smiling yet, etc?

Mishta, btw, that story sounds bad to me too. Think your friend needs another scan if she is sure of dates.

Drama, hope you're okay in the run up to amnio. Agree that hearing the heartbeat is magical....

mooms · 24/09/2010 19:16

oh coffee that is fab news! so, so pleased for you! great to hear good news on a friday, helps us all!

katiecubs · 24/09/2010 19:27

Thanks Can't - oh he is just lovely! Pretty happy most of the time apart from when he has windy problems or is trying to do a poo!

I'm not sure if he has properly smiled or not yet but today i am pretty certain he did - i like to think so anyway. I have posted some more bathtime pics in my profile if you would like to see - check out the chubby cheeks!!

It's crazy on one hand i can't wait for him to start interacting more and grow into his own little personality and on the other it all seems to be going too quicky and i just want to stop he getting so big :)

I imagine baby Can't is quite a little lady now? How are her sister and her getting on?

Cantdothisagain · 24/09/2010 20:41

Oh Katie he is absolutely gorgeous. Such beautiful eyes. He's clearly thriving; you must be so proud.

About the wind, you might have tried this, but massage works sometimes (google it). And I feel exactly the same as you about Babycant growing. She is sitting up unaided now, and she has the most infectious gurgle. Still hasn't learnt the value of sleep, but you can't have everything...

Dramamama · 24/09/2010 20:47

Can't- pretty sure Gina is expecting a little boy too!
.....i'll find out on tues if i am too...although i'm pretty sure i only make blue ones Grin

LongtimeinBrussels · 24/09/2010 21:06

Oh wow Katie, hasn't Felix grown?! I know they do that babies but he's changed so much. And what a gorgeous baby he is :)!

I'm glad at least you've sorted out what you're doing with his feeding. I understand the disappointment as I felt it too (though was lucky enough to turn it around) but you're better off without the stress and so is he.

Cant, just to be the exception, my DSs fed no problem, even DS2 who was 5 weeks early. It was DD I had problems with.

Lovely to see some good news on this thread :) (I feel I know you all as when catching up with Katie I check up on you all even though you don't know me).

Cantdothisagain · 24/09/2010 21:15

Hi Longtime, well my theory was entirely based on personal observation, and clearly total crap! Nice that you stop by.

Drama, hmm, so we have some more boys coming....

LongtimeinBrussels · 25/09/2010 20:57

:)

NumptyMum · 25/09/2010 22:43

Coffee - meant to post yesterday but so pleased you had a good scan, hooray!

Sorry not to write more but I'm shattered - off to bed now. Thanks for all the well-wishes for BabyJ Smile

Mishtabel · 26/09/2010 09:07

Just quickly...
Coffee, that's excellent, what a relief for you :)

Katie, Felix is gorgeous. Thanks for sharing the photos. Must pull my finger out and put some up myself

Can't, thanks for the explanation re: SWI - I was thinking it was something like Sex Without Interest, so I guess I wasn't too far off. I rang my pregnant friend - she ended up having the nuchal in the end, and pregnancy is all good thankfully, though they found a tumour in her uterus, which they're going to biopsy, so she's a bit worried about that now

Hello and love to everyone else. Enjoy the rest of your weekend xxx

mooms · 26/09/2010 10:42

Hi ladies. I need a bit of hand holding and honest advice please.
I'm worried because I'm 6 weeks pregnant but have no real symptoms. Only signs have been needing the loo more and a couple of instances where I've felt nauseous, but haven't been sick. also slightly bloated and tired more quickly on a night. oh and more spotty and greasy haired than usual.

Last time I had really tender and swollen boobs, nausea ( again, not much sickness) , needed the loo more, couldn't stand certain smells and was lots more swollen in general. i just knew i was pregnant.

This time round, if it wasn't for the positive pregnancy tests, i would hardly know.

Because of what happened with last baby, i'm just worrying myself sick. is it normal to have hardly any symptoms? am driving myself mad with worry!

honest answers please!

katiecubs · 26/09/2010 12:23

Hi Mooms i think it's totally normal, every pregnancy is differant.

This time round i had no symptoms at all until nearly 8 weeks - i was freaking out so much that something was wrong that i had an early scan and everything was just fine! Sure it will be for you too - BTW congratulations!

Mishtabel would love to see some pics! :)

LittlePoot · 26/09/2010 12:29

Just dropping in to see how Coffee's doing taking in the good news? Hope you're ok sweetie.

Mooms - I didn't get strong nausea until about 7-8 weeks this time, and my boobs weren't as sore at any point as they had been the first time. They did grow though.... but probably not as early as six weeks. Someone did once tell me that the boob thing is always worse the first time, but who knows what 'scientific proof' they had for that...

Six weeks is very early sweetie, and your list of symptoms (after you state you have no symptoms) sounds very much like mine - honestly. But nothing is going to make you feel much better this time until you get to see baby wriggling on a scan. And even that will only make you feel better for a week or two if you're anything like me. Have you got an early scan booked? For my first pregnancy after the termination, I had a scan at 8/9 weeks to get a more accurate date for the nuchal scan. Unfortunately, that one did show a missed miscarriage so for the next pregnancy (this one) they offfered me a scan at 6/7 weeks, another at 8/9 weeks and then the normal nuchal at 12. Nerver wracking as it was, it was eventually reassuring, so have a word with your doctor/midwife/early-pregnancy unit to see if they can offer you something. 8/9 weeks is probably the best point to go for (if you can wait that long) because at 6 weeks, the best you can hope for is a blob with a pulse - doesn't tell you a whole lot and isn't always easy to find.

Hang on in there and look after yourself - fingers crossed there's a bean-to-be happily setting up home as we speak. xx

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Coffeeandchocolate · 26/09/2010 18:06

Hello ladies, I am back for what I think might be a long (ish) post, after a busy week and no internet connection for most of today. Once again, thank you all for cheering me on. I?ve only been away for a couple of days but I feel like it?s a lot to catch up with.

Viv, I hope your scan yesterday went well, let us know how you are.

Catlady, how is the househunting going? And when is your scan next week?

Allstars, I am happy little Frankie is recovering and you are well. No worries about not being able to post, it?s good to hear from you though.

Mishta and Cantdo, it?s lovely to hear your voices and I?m so happy Bella and Little miss Cantdo are happy and healthy. I remember when I was only lurking and reading back in here, Mishta had just had Bella and Cantdo was about 32 weeks pregnant. Where does time go?!!! Same for Katie, you were not 24 weeks yet when I started posting on this board, and now it?s so lovely to read about you and Felix. He is absolutely gorgeous, I loved the photos.

Drama, last time I have seen my mw (about 16 weeks) she struggled to get a clear heartbeat, but the rate was 140 bpm too, she managed to catch it in the end. Our little ones are so tiny still and there is so much fluid around them? I?ll keep my fingers crossed everything goes well on Tuesday, you sound so positive though I am impressed.

Mooms, I completely understand why you are anxious although 6 weeks is really early. I was only starting to get mild nausea around this time in this pregnancy. What you describe are real symptoms though, but I agree that with our history we worry about everything. And every pregnancy really is different, my nausea has not been so bad this time. If you are not bleeding it really is a good sign. I would try to get an early scan if possible, even if just to put your mind at rest until the nuchal. Can you speak with a mw as well? In my area, they do the booking in much earlier if you had a previous loss, or if not you might be able to give them a call?

Poot,thanks for checking in on me. I am ok. I am enjoying feeling relieved while it lasts. I know we?re not out of the woods yet, but the prof?s attitude was so positive that we have taken heart from this. Even if my heart has skipped a beat just as I was writing this and I am still terrified that anomalies in the brain will start developing between now and 21 weeks. It is possible even if highly unlikely. It?s taken some time to sink in that for the moment nothing seems wrong with Coffeebean, and when I came out of the scan room I just sank on the sofa and sobbed. I still feel very emotional actually.

What a mammoth post, somebody shut me up! I hope everyone is well, hello to Gina and Numpty as well, and also keeping my fingers crossed for Kittens and Mimsy, I hope this is your lucky month! Big hugs lovely ladies xxxx

VivClicquot · 27/09/2010 10:49

Morning ladies

Just to let you all know my scan on Saturday was a good one - we have one perfect-looking baby, measuring bang-on for dates, with a strong heartbeat, making him or herself at home. Am so relieved to get over this first hurdle okay, even though I know there's a long way to go yet.

coffee - what lovely news about your good scan. And a boy! How wonderful!

mooms - I'm 8+5 and have been relatively nausea-free so far. In fact, I'd say my only two recurrent symptoms are mid-afternoon exhaustion and constipation - other than that, it's been very straightforward so far. So really do try not to worry - I know it's easier said than done, but as everyone else has said, it's better for you and the baby to relax and take it easy!

Anyway, have a busy day ahead so better crack on. Much love to everybody else.

Viv x

ps - Katie, Felix is so scrummy! You must be smitten :)

LittlePoot · 27/09/2010 11:00

Hello all.

Coffee - glad you're enjoying the momentary feeling of relief! I'm about to head off for my 21 week scan, so am a bit of a bundle of nerves just now. Dot's kicking away though, so hopefully that's a good sign.

Viv - how was Saturday? I hope all is ok?

And how are you doing dramamama ahead of the amnio tomorrow? I hope they can get the results back to you soon.

Then its you next my Crazy friend? Hope you're hanging in there too. xxx

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LittlePoot · 27/09/2010 11:06

Sorry - xpost with you Viv. Fantastic news! xxxxx

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LittlePoot · 27/09/2010 17:33

Very quiet around here today? Hope that means everyone is ok? I'm now fully scanned and all seems well. Very odd feeling - like finding out I'm pregnant all over again, except I have a bump and only 19 weeks to go..... xxxxxx

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MimsyStarr · 27/09/2010 19:34

Hi Poot, Yay! Smile Grin Excellent news on your scan. Thank goodness. I didn't know your scan was today. Did you find out the sex? (I have a feeling you found out at your last scan, and I am being dim and not remembering... seem to be lots of boys about).

And Viv too - another big congrats.

I haven't been looking at MN that much lately - not really sure why, haven't been that busy! Dunno.

Numpty, I am very pleased to hear that about Josie's heart being all clear. A relief. xxx

Crazycatlady · 27/09/2010 20:25

Wonderful news about the scans coffee, viv and poot!

I'm struggling to keep up with the thread a bit at the moment but it's so lovely to pop in and hear about all this good news, it's just brilliant.

My 20 week scan is on Friday. Thankfully I have a very busy week ahead so will be distracted and will be in that scan room before I know it. Like everyone else I'm struggling to imagine that it will be anything other than bad news...

Our househunting has ground to a halt. We spent the weekend in Dorset exploring areas and viewing a few properties but it just didn't feel right. We want to be very close to the sea, but it's all quite urban and built up near the beaches, which just doesn't really appeal. So we're going to put everything on hold and think again next year, probably to move to Sussex, which was our original plan years ago. Only the dream home will tear me away from London though, so we'll need to find an extra £150k on top of our budget in equity, cash or mortgagability to get the dream house. Eek.

While I'm on, does anyone work in advertising? I've just been offered a contract in the PR arm of M&C Saatchi and am feeling a bit unsure about it. Looking for inside goss...

lots of love xx

MimsyStarr · 27/09/2010 20:44

Sorry, was called for dinner before I could finish that post properly (DH cooked quail, yum!)

We had no real luck in the TTC this month. I say no real luck, because my period arrived 3 days late, and I am usually Miss Clockwork, so I suspect that something might have happened but not 'taken'. Just a hunch, I didn't test until Sat night (so I could have a few wines) and it was neg by then.

Coffee, congrats on your positive scan too! It is good to see so much good news here. Making me think positive thoughts!!

Dramamama · 27/09/2010 21:05

Hi all,
With regards to the amnio tommorow i'm actually pooing myself tbh i can't help but think something will be wrong, so i'm currently trying to distract myself with crap tv!
Viv that is great news on the scan, sorry i'm not more talkative tonight but you probably understand i'm anxious; hopefully i'll be better after it's all over XxXx

Coffeeandchocolate · 27/09/2010 21:11

Hurray Poot and Viv, I am so happy for you, great news! Poot, I know what you mean that you feel like you?ve just found out you?re pregnant, you?ve hit the nail on the head! So little Dot is not so little anymore and just getting stronger now :)

Mimsy, boo to the AF! I hope next month will be luckier, until then enjoy as much seafood and wine as possible.

Kittens, you've been quiet, when are you testing this month?

Drama, you must be so anxious, I?ll be thinking of you tomorrow and waiting for your news.

Catlady, if you?re coming to Sussex let me know, I live in West Sussex, although I am in London quite often. It?s great you?re having a busy week, distraction is the only way to get through this. There is no way you can avoid feeling anxious, but time will pass and I?ll be keeping fingers and toes crossed that you get good news on Friday.

Mooms, how are you?

As for me, I am still relieved, although I can feel this is already starting to wear off. It?s much better than before though, and the chances that it will all be well increased dramatically. Trouble is I can?t really believe we will end up with a healthy baby next year. I couldn?t help getting excited at the week-end and talking with dh about the baby as if this were a ?normal? pregnancy. I even started making plans in my mind, but then it was all getting too scary and I had to stop and go back to my cautious self.

Anyway, this is the best I can hope for at this stage, so I am trying to find a bit of positivity in this thought.

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