Support thread for women who are pregnant or TTC after a termination for abnormalities 2

[LittlePoot]

Dear all lovely ladies past, present and future. Welcome to support thread number two, to help us through the anxious TTC waiting, early scary weeks of pregnancy, nasty scans and tests, growing bumps and babies and everything in between. May this thread bring luck and (eventual) joy to us all and at least we'll all be here to hold eachothers' hands along the way. x

Hi Gooldy, have been wondering about you. That is fantastic news. BRILLIANT news. It is great when you can come out of a scan with confidence.

Glad you enjoyed Turkey. We were supposed to be leaving tomorrow for Turkey, but we booked via that company that went bust recently, and have put the holiday off for a while. (will spend some days somewhere in tropical sunny scotland instead!) Where did you go in Turkey? Would you recommend a place? We were going to Turunc, a quiet village outside of Marmaris. I am still keen to go there.

Katiecubs hope the workshop helped. Its amazing how much support is out there. The NCT breastfeeding help line was good for me too - I am pretty sure you dont have to be a member for them to help you either.

I went to my appointment yesterday at the MC clinic. Not much to be done really, seeing as all tests have been normal. They are willing to try me on progesterone pessaries once I get preg again. Not on the basis of evidence, just on the basis it might help me feel I am at least doing something! I had one healthy baby without progesterone supplementation, so I know I don't need it, but it can't hurt ... so I may as well try it. That's all the news from Chez Starr.

Kittens AF has just been and gone, so I am getting out the Ov sticks again. You?

x

Great news from Drama, Coffee, Gina and Goodly

I'm still only getting time to pop in fleetingly so apologies if I'm not up to speed with everyone.

I hope Katie is getting back on track with the BF and wish Poot the best of luck with her upcoming scan. Still would love to hear from Allstars to know that all is well with her and the little one. Also wondering how Sarah got on with her scan. As a new member of the thread I was worried that she would have seen the 'silence' after her posting up until her scan as disinterest but it was just that I suspect we were all absent for the bank hols. I hope all went as hoped for her.

Mimsy, I should be joining you on the TTC quest soonish. I have my appointment on Monday with the Hematologist. Still haven't heard back regarding my MTHFR test so hopefully that will have shown up in time for my appointment but it's primarily to discuss what course of treatment I would have for the Antithrombin III deficiency during my next pregnancy. I think AF is due next weekend so I am OV again in 2 weeks so I guess that's when I will start trying again.

Hey all,
With regards to the invasive testing we are talking to our consultant on the 13th so we'll see what he says, but i'd rather have an amnio then a cvs as i've done it before and i know what it entails and obviously it's got a lower mc rate, i guess i just want an answer one way or the other.
In other news today would have been Liams due date so i'm not in the best place but i'm coping as best i can (been throwing up all day) Hope everyone else is doing better then me atm, love to you all XxXxXxX

Oh no, just noticed that Sarahmia has started a new thread and looks like the news is bad - Sarah, if you're reading this thread still, do feel free to return for hand-holding through this time and the times to come. xx

Hi Girls,

Was pointed in your direction by another MNer on a conception thread.

We are TTC after a termination back in May due to Annencephaly. I was 15wks at the time and very much looking forward to becoming a new mum even though it was unplanned and ver scary for us both. We were both devastated when we found out but decided to start to try again pretty much straight away. I didn't know about this thread otherwise would have maybe posted you sooner.

I have battled with guilt ever since, even though I know we made the right decision really. Every month AF arrives it deflates us both. My poor DP was absolutley gutted this month cos I was 4 days late and we really thought we hit the jackpot then AF arrived Sunday morning. Boo!

Could I please join your thread?

XX

Hi MIMSY thanks for your reply. That's V bad news re not going on your hols I hope you have managed to recover your money? It's the 6th time for us to Turkeyhaving been to lovely place each time. We are just back from Antalya, Lara from a hotel called Baia Lara, which is an ultra deluxe all-inclusive. Can highly recommend it. It's only in it's second season so well worth a visit whilst it's still new. Fethiye is also a lovely place to visit or Belek all around the Turkish Riviera.

:-)

Welcome StormBird, good to have another TTC'er on the board. It's a scary step to take, but I hope you will take heart from all the thread babies who have made an appearance over the last year that it is still very possible to have a "happy ending".

My news is, well, no news really. I feel a bit like the last 8 weeks may as well have not happened (in terms of hospital appointment only, of course!). I went to see the Hematologist and she said that the Antithrombin levels that had been flagged up were only very slightly lower than normal - should be 8, mine reads 7.7. She also said that as I had the tests quite soon after my miscarriage that the results could not be taken as an accurate representation anyway, so, I had another lot of tests today and have to wait for another appointment in a month - as it's only a monthly clinic. So, all I know for now is that she will recommend taking asprin during any future pregnancy but the tests are to see if anything else is necessary. From what she said, it's looking like I am in a similar position to Mimsy in that it's possible there is no real reason other than bad luck for the 3 miscarriages but that I should take asprin anyway...... FFS! I still feel like I should hold off TTC until I get the full picture to give myself the best chance of my next pregnancy working out though. I also left a note for Mr "Miracle Man" to ask his opinion on the progesterone supplements. Somewhat frustrated

Don't know if Sarahmia is reading this thread but if you are, I am so so sorry to hear your news.

Sorry to hear about your holiday Mimsy. I do hope you can get some compensation and get a nice holiday still.

LittlePoot, when's your scan?

Hi guys,
God - work's a pain!! It's always the same - people come back from their summer holidays and suddenly expect me to drop everything and do their stuff for them instead of the stuff I'm already quite busy on myself, thanks very much. Grrrrr....

Anyway, first up - big welcome to StormBird - of course you can join us. I'm really sorry to hear about your first baby, but wish you all the very best for TTC now. I don't know if you've trawled through any of this thread at all, but between us we know exactly where you are and how you might be feeling. I'm 18 weeks pregnant with pregnancy number 3 and hopefully baby number 1 after losing one to Downs syndrome a year ago and miscarrying another in February. Have my anomoly scan tomorrow so panicking again right now, but have actually been feeling pretty sane of late (for a change!). So hopefully there is some light at the end of the tunnel. We've got some fairly new mums here who have had previous problems, and quite a few entering the 2nd trimester as well as some fellow TTC-ers. We don't have (m)any magic answers, but I've found it incredibly helpful just to have some virtual voices who understand where I've been and where I am and are routing for me along the way. So welcome, and I hope we can help.

Viv - how's things? Hope you're not suffering from too many early symptoms - just enough to make you feel like things are going well....

Drama - your results sounded pretty good to me, but I can understand them not giving you as much reassurance as you were hoping for. Hope you're doing ok.

Kittens - how did your appointment go today? Hope there was something useful and no more backwards steps. Can't wait to be holding your hand through another nuchal scan - or you Mimsy. Fingers crossed for you honey.

Gina and Coffee and Gooldy and Rachel and Crazycat and everyone else I've just forgotten - hope all's well and bumps are growing. And love to Katie, Numpty, Can't, Allstars and all - hope babies and boobs are doing their thing.

xxxxxxx

Sorry - x-post with kittens. xxx

Hi all. Just a very short one to let you know I had a scan this afternoon which confirmed an early miscarriage, so sadly I'm back on the TTC bus, or will be soon.

Really sorry to hear that Wombat. I hope you're bearing up. x

Oh Wombat, I am sorry. Hope you can get through this awful time. Do you have lots of support around?

And Sarahmia, your news on your other thread is truly devastating. I am so sorry this has happened to you again.

Welcome to Stormbird. We will keep you company. I am just starting TTC again after a recent MMC. Found the Pregnacare today (where I had tossed it in a huff last time) and started taking it again. Next, it will be peeing on Ov sticks ( I bought a stash from a site Kittens recommended). Back on the merry-go-round ...

Kittens, that must be very frustrating, but also in a way could be good news, if your levels turn out to be normal on the repeat test. Do you start the aspirin before you are pregnant, or once you know? I will be interested to see what Miracle Man says about progesterone too. There has been a lot of press about recurrent MC lately, did you see the Observer thing about cohesins? (think that was the spelling. It's some 'glue' that holds our chromosomes together in our eggs, and decreases with age.) Sounded very clever. Made my thoughts turn to PGD again.

Gooldy, I am liking the sound of ultra deluxe all inclusive! I will check it out. I am determined to get to Turkey again one day. At least we got our money back easily (the agent hadn't yet paid it over, so we got it straight back).

Better stop typing and get some sleep. Big wave to Poot.
Hope Numpty has recovered after the party. x.

Hi Mimsy, yes, I did see that article. MIL tore it out for me. Sounds like an exciting breakthrough but sadly I suspect it will be those a little younger that will benefit from the eventual solution - ie. not sure how long it will take before they come up with anything.

Here's the article for anyone else who hasn't seen it;

www.guardian.co.uk/science/2010/sep/02/fertility-study-mice-eggs-older-mothers

I fear that once my blood results come back, I will just be in the hands of the hematologist, if at all, and that my dealings with the "miracle man" may be behind me.

Thank you all for the welcome. I'm looking forward to getting to know you all.

I have my first counselling session today so will let you know how I get on soon.

Afternoon all. Just a quick one (for a change) to let you know the scan was all good. All of it. They could see everything they were looking for and it was all doing what it was meant to be doing. I feel kind of shell-shocked. I got myself into such a state before the scan - maybe one day I'll get over my scan-o-phobia. Not bothered today though, because me and my kicking, wriggling little dot are doing just fine. xxxx

HURRAY LittlePoot! Again, I am getting all emotional reading positive news in here, I am so happy for you. Well done LittleDot!

Just checking in for the first time in a while and am very happy to see lots of positive scans ? congrats to Gooldy, Dramamama, Gina, Poot!

Strormbird welcome ? so sorry for your loss, we have all been there with the guilt but we did the best we could for our little lost babies, ourselves and our families. I really hope your TTC works out for you soon. I have a 3 week old baby now sand there are many other ladies on here who have had happy endings too.

Sarahmia and Wobmbat so sorry to hear your bad news ? I am thinking of you both xxx

Kittens sorry you don?t have any answers yet, but in a way it could be a good thing although frustrating. Good luck TTC again if that?s the way you decide to go ? I would say I hope it happens soon but it always does! Good luck this month too Mimsy!

As for me all is good ? breast feeding is not really going anywhere, just don?t seem to have enough milk and I can be trying to feed Felix for an hour and a half and then he will still be hungry and wolf down 3/4oz formula afterwards. Trying to feed him for so long has made me sore again so I am back to expressing as much as I can but it?s so time consuming and as Felix is difficult to get to sleep in the day I?m really struggling to fit it in!

Any tips for getting a baby down to take naps would be much appreciated! He was awake nearly all day yesterday and by the evening was so overtired he was inconsolable poor wee thing. Nights are good so far though!

Quick hello from me! Poot I'm so thrilled for you!!! Its wonderful to hear your news, like Coffee I'm all choked up here! xxxxx

Poot, that's brilliant news. Yay!

Katie, sorry to hear the BF is proving to be somewhat of an ordeal. If you end up formula feeding him full time, so be it. There is so much pressure to BF these days and if it works out then great but there's no point in putting yourself through so much pain and beating yourself up if it doesn't work out.

I'm pretty much shitting myself at the prospect of TTC again. After reading that article too, I am just thinking that after so many 'failures', especially with the 2 TS21 pregnancies in a row, that maybe what they have written about is the reason and on that basis why should it ever work out for me?

I have just been given some money by my grandma after she sold her house and am planning to buy myself a car. I am trying to be practical/optimistic and go for a 5 door car but part of me just thinks 'f* it, why don't I just get something sporty? The way things have gone so far, there's every chance I will remain childless.' So, not feeling massively positive at the moment I'm afraid. Shame, 'cos I'm broody as hell at the moment!

Hello, sorry for silence - been on holiday.

Good news from so many of you, that's fantastic. Good scans are such a happy novelty.. and it means the end is getting closer... which is also good news.

Wombat I am so sorry about your early miscarriage.

Kittens/Mimsy, I've been reading about the cohesing thing too. I agree it may explain why some of us have had multiple problems and it may seem v discouraging. Having said that, Shangrila, Lins, me, we all had more than one termination and we ended up with healthy babies. So even if some of us do have higher propensity for these problems, we can still have healthy babies - don't lose heart, please. And Kittens - I would recommend the sports car purely because Sod's Law makes sense to me - surely a sports car would mean you HAD to have a successful pregnancy.

Katie, sorry about the breastfeeding. Have you tried fenugreek etc to boost supply (maybe post in breast/bottle feeding area to ask for other tips)? Otherwise I agree with Kittens that formula is fine.
About the sleep. Ha. I have 2 sleep resisting children, and know all the tips... What works most easily for mine is the electric swing - if you dont have one, you can ask to try one in Mothercare/Mamas and P, etc, and see if Felix likes it; don't buy before seeing - vigorous pram walking or lying down with baby and holding both hands with arms around them, oh and a sling. Do you have a sling? I have 2 Hugabubs and a Connecta - babies love being nestled in the sling and walking up and down stairs tends to get them dozy....
Of course I have a crap track record with sleep so probably you are better sleep-training them to nap for hours at a time in their cots rather than catnap as my two did/do. Just offering tips for if you are as desperate as I have been!

Babycan't is nearly 5 months, and is growing cleverer by the day. She is also a massive poo-monster, capable of defying nappy, vest and clothes to spurt all over me...

Quick post as only just getting time at the computer today! Sorry I'll be brief, welcome to Storm and I'm really pleased to read about all the positive scans for ladies already on the journey (well done to Poot and Dot!!), as well as being very sad to hear about the news from Wombat and Sarah...

Kittens, I'd also suggest getting the sports car, I got loads of non-pregnancy non-breastfeeding clothes when fed up last autumn, just prior to getting pregnant with Josie - so I was stylish for all of 2 months. At least you'd get a few more months use out of a sports car. On the other hand, getting in and out of a sports car when pregnant might be a struggle!

Mimsy, I'm hoping your hols aren't too damp... the party went well thanks, only just starting to recover - we were exhausted on Sunday evening and Monday! I think there were 16 small children, hard to keep count when they move at the pace of a sugar fueled 3-year old . We survived! I even got the church hall cleared up by 5pm, thanks to willing and kind parents helping out.

Katie - have you managed to get along to a breastfeeding support group? They might have tips re feeding. I used to 'switch feed', ie 15 mins one side, then swap to the other, as a) was more comfortable and b) baby gets full breast, so gets fuller quicker. I think! Anyway, that's what I'm back to doing again now so long as Josie doesn't fall asleep when feeding. Re naps, with DS I sometimes fed him on his pillow then sat there just so he could sleep for a while longer... which is OK if you've not got anything else to do, or haven't got the remote control/cup of tea/water JUST out of arms reach. With Josie, electric swing works too (borrowed from friend), or sling (wraps, got 2nd hand - check out slingmeet or UKbabywearingswap yahoo group for used ones) or if timing right, in the buggy/pram. Sometimes she'll start fussing/crying right before going to sleep, it's very easy to think I need to pick her up but actually she's just on the point of dropping off and fighting it. Also if the environment changes, she can wake up; eg we walk along a busy street and she's fine, go into a quiet shop and she'll wake. With DS my trick was to go shopping to local supermarket (5 mins away) when he was needing morning or afternoon nap, hang round the chiller section til he dropped off, then nip back home within first 20 mins of his nap - that way he was in deep enough sleep he'd go for an hour or so. If I stayed out, something always woke him up... You could also try swaddling blanket, I've a spare one if you'd like me to post it to you (fleecy, so hopefully OK in cooler weather).

Anyway, so much for brief post! Better go to bed. Good to hear from you Cant, and love to BabyCant. I think Josie might have matched BabyCant's explosions on Sunday, luckily it was after the party and luckily DH was holding her xx

Morning all
DS is off at nursery so i am taking full advantage and putting my feet up with the laptop and a cuppa to catch-up with my favorite ladies,
Kittens i was also going to suggest buying the sports car as numpty said sods law can be a wonderful thing when you learn how to use it to your advantage and if it does work you can always sell it or trade it in for a 5 door?
Katie I had a similar prob (ie:the sleeping) with DS i found fresh air was the key taking him out for a stroll before nap time usually had him out for the count especially if he was in the sling as he could hear my heartbeat too, but the pram worked just as well as he got a bit older that or taking him for a drive helped..in fact he still zonks out in the car now and he's 4 lol. As for bf i agree with Kittens too there is so much pressure to bf these days unless you feel 100% really strongly that you want to carry on there really is no shame in bottle feeding and if you do go down that route i can recomend aptimil i started bottle feeding DS at 4 months and it was the best one i found, but if you are determined try your local surestart centre they often have a bresast feeding group where you can get support and advice mine was a life saver good luck!
Poot So happy for you! i think i may have also developed scanaphobia so your good news has boosted my confidence a bit, give littledot a pat for me
Cant good to hear from you! i pmsl at baby cants nappy explosions i remember it well and fingers crossed will have to contend with it all over again soon!...what i want to know is hasw they manage to get it up their backs...thats a skill! lol.
Hello to everyone else too Mimsy,Allstars,Coffee,Kittens welcome to Stormbird! and lots of love to Sarahmia and Wombat be gentle to yourselves and if you want a few friendly voices you know where we are XxXxXxX

Hi ladies, I am back with a longer post after a few days? absence. The truth is I am not in a great place at the moment and am feeling very negative about everything. I am grateful to be pregnant and I?m feeling really lucky about this, but at the same time I can?t see how this can be a successful pregnancy, ?just? the second time. And I have started to get really attached to this baby and can?t imagine losing him/her too. A little bit more than 2 weeks to go until the first anomaly scan and I am getting more pessimistic by the day.

First of all, welcome to Stormbird, and lots of luck with TTC!

I was very sorry to hear about Sarah and Wombat ? if you?re reading, please know that you can always come in here for a bit of hand holding.

Kittens, frustrating indeed about your meeting with the haematologist. I hope you will get some answer from the Miracle Man and not have to wait for a whole month. Did you also have the results of your motherf...... test?

Cantdo, it?s good to have you back, I?d been wondering about you. Glad to hear Littlemisscantdo is doing so well, though you must be shattered! I?m also wondering about Mishta, I think she?s caravanning somewhere gorgeous :)

Hello to everyone else, Gina, Numpty, Mimsy, Poot (has the news sunk in yet?) , Catlady (I hope you?re well), Drama, Gooldy... did I forget anyone? xxxx

Oh Coffee, sorry to hear you're feeling this way. It's so hard to feel optimistic after our experiences. I don't think there is a single person on this thread who hasn't hit this patch if you read back over the last few weeks. I don't mean that dismissively, of course. Just that I hope you will glean some sort of hope from their positive outcomes recently.

I didn't really understand what she said about the MTHFR thing. She said it wasn't significant and that it was just dotting the i's and crossing the t's and that 40% of all women have what I have, whatever that means. I guess that she would've said if she thought that whatever the result was meant I should have anything more than asprin.

I have to rush off now to work again. I'm sorry I keep posting such brief posts and not getting a chance to properly catch up and mention everyone but I feel a bit like I'm chasing my tail at the moment!

Love to you all though. And if anyone else on here, apart from Sarahmia and myself are jewish, Shana Tova to you x (Today is Jewish New year)

Sorry, that last bit doesn't sound right. I did sent my wishes to Sarahmia on her other thread but, if you are reading this first Sarahmia, I hope the new year brings you luck and joy. Well, I hope that for all of us actually even if you're not jewish x