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Support thread for women who are pregnant or TTC after a termination for abnormalities - Thread 6

999 replies

Treaclepie19 · 16/03/2020 10:15

Welcome to the newest thread of support for those ladies who are pregnant or trying to conceive after terminating for abnormalities. Since this thread first began (almost ten years ago!) there have been stories of heart break, sadness and fear, but from these stories there have also been stories of happiness, success and most importantly, hope. Here they are, our thread babies, and may the list continue to grow:

@Mishtabel - Bella 22/01/10
@Linspins – Franklin 22/01/10
@Shangrila – baby boy 01/02/10
@Cantdothisagain – Babycan't 12/04/10
@Katerina100 – baby boy 06/10
@NumptyMum - Josie 28/06/10
@Allstarsprincess – Frank 30/07/10
@Katiecubs - Felix 13/08/10
@GinaFB – Alexander 03/01/11
@LittlePoot - Jacob 02/02/11
@Coffeeandchocolate – Coffeebean 22/02/11
@Rushingrachel – Oliver 02/03/11
@Crazycatlady - Lawrence 08/03/11
@Dramamama - Isabella 13/03/11
@VivClicquot - Phoebe 28/04/11
@LisbethSalander - baby boy 7/11
@Stormbird – George 24/07/11
@Sarahmia – baby girl 25/07/11
@Eavers – Jacob 11/08/11
@Grandj – Eliot 01/09/11
@Babylily – Miles 05/09/11
@NatzCNL - Sienna 26/09/11
@Manitz - Sacha 28/09/11
@Cherrybug – Kade 02/11/11
@Ghislaine - Charles 14/01/12
@Mrsbigz - Callum 19/01/12
@MyangelAva - Isabella 21/1/12
@Bezzyk - Minibez II 2/2/12
@Katerina100 – baby girl 19/04/2012
@flower11 – Hannah 18/10/2012
@Bluecat83 – Noah est 24/10/2012
@katiecubs – Seth 05/02/2013
@Havingkittens – Alfred 14/04/2013
@ghislane – Frederick 22/10/2013
@lostlove – baby boy est 10/04/14
@AliBingo – baby boy est 06/05/14
@LuckyAugust –baby boy 26/01/2015

OP posts:
Thread gallery
12
Kiki275 · 26/09/2020 07:34

AF has arrived in full force early. I am beyond pissed off. Wish my body would just regulate so I can predict better. Half tempted to start temping. What does everyone use and would you recommend?x

Mummabear40 · 26/09/2020 07:49

@Kiki275 oh no sorry to hear, it’s so bloody disappointing isn’t it!

I temp and find it does accurately show ovulation and AF coming but it shows ovulation after the event rather than predict it if you know what I mean as it’s the trend in temperatures that signify it.

Kiki275 · 26/09/2020 08:24

@Mummabear40 thanks, would I be better with ovulation tests?? Just looked on Amazon and there are so many. Plus some are £££ x

Mummabear40 · 26/09/2020 08:30

@Kiki275 ovulation kits are better to show you your ovulation days, the trend in temp afterwards then confirms this. I like Temping as I tend to obsess less about whether AF is coming or if the cycle has worked as you can tell from your temps if it has. However it isn’t always accurate say if you don’t sleep well, don’t do it at the same time etc.
I didn’t spend a huge amount on mine, just got one with good ratings and that doesn’t link to my phone, I have to put the temps in.

Redhead43 · 26/09/2020 21:16

Sorry to read this @Kiki275 I’m so disappointed for you xxx

Kiki275 · 26/09/2020 22:21

Thanks ladies. Bought myself some proper preconception vitamins (rather than just leftover pregnancy ones) and some ovulation kit strips thing from Amazon. I meant business last month but things are about to get serious Grinx

1stbabs · 27/09/2020 12:58

@Kiki275 I'm sorry 😔 .. FWIW I fell first time when I tried using the ovulation sticks. If I was relying on EWCM I defo would have missed it. Fingers crossed this is your cycle 🤞🏽 xx

@Treaclepie19 hope you're enjoying every second with your baby girl, and that you've managed to get some sleep now!! X

Hope all you ladies are doing ok. I'm 28+4 today, and started feeling very anxious again about this baby recently. Cannot stop dreaming that something goes wrong and we lose him 😔. Hoping to speak to my counsellor soon, maybe that will help xx

Treaclepie19 · 27/09/2020 19:49

Thank you @1stbabs
Yeah I've had some sleep and I'm taking in every second with baby. So in love and content.

I'm so sorry @kiki275. I'm keeping everything crossed for you! All of you.

I felt like that the further I went on @1stbabs. Hope the counsellor can help a little. It's so understandable after what we've been through.

I was so grateful in labour that the student midwife I had understood TFMR because her nephew had died through a tfmr. I needed that compassion and deep understanding of how tough it might be.

OP posts:
NoCallerID · 28/09/2020 09:27

@Kiki275 ah I'm so sorry. Def try the ovulation sticks on top. One thing I found is don't stop testing once you have your peak, sometimes it can take another day of positive OPKs. And test several times a day, it's so easy to miss.

@Redhead43 keeping everything crossed in your tww. 🤞🏼

@Treaclepie19 this has actually had me tear up. I'm so glad you had someone with a deeper understanding of your situation around you during labour.

@1stbabs that sounds hard. Dreams can be awful, I've always had vivid dreams about things. I've actually had long conversations about this with one of my colleagues a while back as he's the same. There is a way of positively influencing your dreams, I've not mastered yet this but I can wake myself up from dreams now which helps a lot.

It seems my higher dose of Agnus Castus is starting to work and I've surprisingly ovulated more than a week earlier than expected. Managed a couple of hearts but feeling a bit down we didn't get any more in. I hate the tww but knowing that my follicular phase can be shorter makes me less anxious. Either way I'll know in less than two weeks. I'm due to take my LC to see my family abroad, I'd actually planned to get a tattoo in memory of our little boy when I'm there but I've kind of got cold feet now so I'm hoping that I won't be able to get it due to being pregnant 😂 (if I'm not I'll do it, no matter the pain.)

Mummabear40 · 28/09/2020 10:06

@Kiki275 I’ve caved and got OPKs too, even though I promised myself I wouldn’t as they make me obsess lol I’m glad I did though as I got a peak reading this morning on CD15 which is early for me. I just hope I’ve caught this cycle.

@Redhead43 thinking out you during your TWW as it feels like forever!!

@NoCallerID I got a wrist tattoo of my Joseph’s name not long after we lost him and absolutely love it, was also surprised how much it didn’t hurt xx

Kiki275 · 28/09/2020 10:55

@Mummabear40 good luck
@NoCallerID thanks for the tip
Thanks & Good luck with the TWW for you both x

NoCallerID · 28/09/2020 14:02

@Mummabear40 that's so sweet 💙
I'm getting his footprints 👣 tattooed on the bottom of my feet since this is the only way his feet will ever be able to walk this earth. I'm aware that it'll look washed out pretty quick but I don't care, I have this thought in my head and I'll just have to go with it. I've got a small tattoo on my shoulder plate and it wasn't very painful. But my brother who's basically got his whole body inked was like "ohhhh that's gonna hurt!" So now I'm doubting myself. 🙈 I'll bite through it - nothing can ever be as painful as losing your baby.

Mummabear40 · 28/09/2020 14:07

@NoCallerID what an absolutely lovely idea, it will be beautiful xx

Redhead43 · 28/09/2020 15:36

@Treaclepie19 So pleased you had someone who could understand with you. Will have made all the difference xx

@NoCallerID that’s so cute and thoughtful about having his feet on the earth. I’m a complete wimp when it comes to stuff like tattoos. Hopefully like you say you’ll be pregnant and won’t be allowed. I have my fingers crossed for that for you.

@Mummabear40 Ihope you managed to catch aswel. Welcome to another TWW. I’ve been so busy at work that this one is going quicker than last month.

Lots of positive vibes to us all 🧡xxx

1stbabs · 28/09/2020 20:44

@Treaclepie19 thank you, it's nice to know I'm not alone in my feelings at least. So glad you had such an understanding midwife too. Xxx

@NoCallerID that is an absolutely beautiful idea ❤️ .. Yeah I've read about changing/influencing dreams. I'm definitely going to give it a go! Hoping your shorter tww goes super quick for you xxx

Wishing @Redhead43 and @Mummabear40 lots of luck and baby dust for your TWW too ladies xx

Had a big cry last night about my little Lola, but I think I needed it as I'm feeling more positive today. Going to try and do some relaxation before bed tonight, and I've also ordered some wildflower and grass seeds to put on her grave (it's a shared grave so doesn't have stones or anything on it).

Hoping we all have a good week x

Kiki275 · 02/10/2020 18:10

Hey everyone, hope you're all okay?
My OPKs have arrived, I'm kind of excited but also afraid of just how obsessive I could get over it. 🤞it doesn't take too long x

Mummabear40 · 02/10/2020 19:18

@Kiki275 I hope you get on well with them and it doesn’t take long for you. I fell quickly using them with my first but got very obsessive with them with our angel baby 🙈 Yet here I am again using them lol I’m glad I did though otherwise I’d have missed my ovulation this cycle as it was early. xx

Kiki275 · 02/10/2020 19:39

@Mummabear40 thanks. I bought my toddler an overpriced 3in1 potty, which has a seat & pot that fit over the loo. Very convenient for Wee samples 😂. I'm perversely glad that I'm at least getting some use out of it as my toddler doesn't like it much x

Mummabear40 · 02/10/2020 20:03

@Kiki275 hahaha love your style!

Redhead43 · 02/10/2020 22:16

@Kiki275 haha I love the wee sample idea so funny 😂

MummyBearBoo · 04/10/2020 09:12

Hi ladies sorry I've been AWOL really struggling to read as the Cataract in my best eye is now much worse (getting it done on 28th) and I can't read thru the eye already done as it only make distance easier to see!!
Congrats @Treaclepie19 so pleased for you!!
I'm 39 weeks today and am being induced tomorrow so hopefully will see my little baby girl in the next couple of days!! Xxx

Redhead43 · 04/10/2020 09:37

Awww @MummyBearBoo not long to go until you meet her then! Hope your eye gets sorted soon - I hope your vision improves after the procedure xx

Kiki275 · 04/10/2020 10:12

@MummyBearBoo it's a shame it can't be done before baby arrives but exciting all the same. Good luck with the induction. How are they inducing you? Will you be allowed home?x

MummyBearBoo · 04/10/2020 11:24

once they start the induction I have to stay in coz I'm high risk -it depends on whether rehab the pessory starts labour by itself or not as to how they proceed after!!

They offered to do my eye before baby but it wasn't that bad before and it was gonna be too close to my due date they don't really want you pushing after you've just had an eye op as it can really-open the wound and not heal properly! !

The artificial lens you get can't adjust to depth like a real one so I'll need reading glasses after to be able to read but my overall vision will be better!

My aches and pain have actually got better since baby is engaged but the low down pressure and pressure on my bladder is so much worse!!

Kiki275 · 04/10/2020 15:57

Ahhh, well we'll all keep everything crossed for you, hope the pessary works soon. Have you got a lots of books, snacks and ear plugs in your hospital bag?x