Husband left me sleeping in hot car

You need to remind your family that no one should leave any member in a car or they could become ill with heat.
See poster above!
Just talk about it calmly at dinner and have your 14 year olds also learn that piece of safety advice, and also to leave windows open or door ajar if feelinig like a car snooze..

Say that you felt alarmed and uncared for and to please wake you up in future.

Surely if you, as an adult, in control of your own actions, think that sleeping in the car is dangerous because of the outside temperature, then you make sure you don't fall asleep in that environment?

TBH, I probably would have woken my DH in that situation, but I find it odd that OP, who is presumably a fully functioning adult, doesn't seem to think she has any responsibility at all for her own actions and her own safety. And if alcohol isn't in play as the OP insists, then yes, a trip to the doctor is most certainly in order to work what the underlying cause of her inability to function normally without needing excessive daytime sleep is.

@BlinkeredBay, yes, I fell asleep in a stationary vehicle which had just been parked up. And the OP was left asleep in a stationary vehicle which has just been parked up.

And something did happen - I was hospitalised with heat stroke, which as I'm sure you know, but are purposely ignoring, is a life threatening emergency, which can lead to, amongst other things, seizures and ultimately death. It vanishingly unlikely that the OP would have got anywhere near that sick, but there was still the chance if her child hadn't happened to come out to the car for something he had forgotten, that she could have become significantly unwell, given how tired she was and potentially how long she could have slept there.

But anyway, I guess saying this is probably pointless because you seem to be being purposefully antagonistic and missing the point. Which is, if her DH left her there on purpose it was a cruel and potentially dangerous thing to do.

@BlinkeredBay

"everyone left the vehicle and despite having a painful neck managed to remain fast asleep…"

Ok, now I know you're at it 🤣, you've never woken with a sore neck after sleeping for his know how long in an awkward position... riiiiigght!

That’s not true is it?

I read it was the other way round and most cars you can’t get out of if someone locks you in?

So, 15min nap in a car, massive over reaction. Take some responsibility for yourself.

How exactly is the OP not taking responsibility for herself? Has your partner/friend whatever never woken you to say "that's us arrived", "the plane has landed", "wake up sleepy head, we are here?" And is it wrong to expect a friend or partner to do so?

Whilst i dont think you would have died, you would have been really uncomfortable or worst case some varying degree of dehydration / heat stroke. Either way, not a pleasant thing for you and very uncaring and inconsiderate of him.

I would be really unhappy if my husbands anger/frustration led him to have so little regard for me.

Well on MN it is a cardinal sin to wake someone up, maybe he thought he would just leave her to it.

OP's husband says he did do this, but she didn't respond. If someone's sleeping deeply enough that a car stopping and everyone else getting out of it doesn't wake them up, a gentle nudge won't do it either. And if they're sleeping that deeply I'd leave them to it rather than going all out to make them wake up.

Either he thought she was asleep in which case leaving her was reasonable for the above reasons.

Or he thought she was awake but sulking in which case leaving her was also reasonable for different but obvious reasons.

But surely even if waking someone up is a "cardinal mumsnet sin", you wouldn't take that to the extent of leaving them in a potentially unsafe or even uncomfortable situation. Unless of course you're doing it out of spite because you have the humph with them...

@WhereTheFuckIsMyFuckingCoat Totally agree with you.
The worst thing the OP did was post in AIBU. It should be renamed as ‘The Mumsnet Pile On’

I butn really easily, even in the car.

Leaving you in direct sunlight is really bad, the more I think about it.

When did standards get so low for men?

Even if it is unlikely that @BlueNavy would get seriously ill in the hot car (children, the elderly and pets are more likely to get serious heat stroke, but it can happen to others), she could still have become very uncomfortable in the car, and it was hardly kind of her husband to leave her there, and not to notice that she hadn't come in and was asleep in the hot car.

You think he did it deliberately because of an earlier argument & you don't believe that he didn't know you were sleeping.

What's the point of being with him?

Exactly!

OP you are moaning about the fact that he didn’t wake you up and left you to get seriously ill or die in a boiling hot car but then say he didn’t think you were asleep.
So he’s not done anything wrong.

I’m guessing the argument earlier in the day was also started by you.

There’s nothing worse than having a parent who you have to walk on egg shells around because they’ll try and start an argument over anything.

How is it her husband's problem/fault/issue that she fell asleep in the car and got hot? That is a her problem. She's not a toddler and he's not her dad.

Isn't that what marriage is, to love and cherish someone?

Do you never do things for your partner just to look out for them and be nice?

It was 15 mins! He didn't leave her in the car for hours. If she was that uncomfortable she would soon wake up, which she did. Total non issue.

Sure, when I feel like it. It's not a duty and I don't do it if I've just been arguing with them.

I most definitely have had a dose after a late night and a large lunch.
The food combined with being tired might knock me out for a short nap.
Very normal, and rather nice.

OP, it most definitely was not nice for him to leave you there to boil.

Not life threatening perhaps but you could wake up feeling quite weak from dehydration.

I certainly wouldn't allow anyone I cared about remain in a hot car.

He could have opened some windows and allowed you snooze safely,......but he didn't.

Do you not wake up at night when you're too hot?
He didn't know you were asleep. You'd had an argument so it's safe to assume he thought you were ignoring him.
You can't have been that wound up by it if you went inside and slept for another hour and a half.
There's no point comparing it to dogs and children. They can't get out.

Not sure actually. If my husband was fast asleep and I knew he was really tired I might have got the kids in first, etc. but would certainly have left the windows open. Really thoughtless not to.

It's a weird thing to do but you wouldn't have come to any harm as you would have woken up once you got too hot. Why do you think that wouldn't have happened? Don't you wake up in the night if it's too hot? Humans wouldn't have lasted very long as a species if they didn't wake up when necessary.

My older sister and her adult children came to stay at my mum's, where I lived at the time.

I used to stay up with them until 1/2am to keep them company. One night I must have dozed in the chair and I woke up to find everyone gone and the light still on.

Turns our they'd all gone to bed and left me there. If I'd been lying on the sofa I could understand, but they just left me there and didn't even put a blanket on me. I asked the next day and they'd all gone up together.

I stopped being so available to them after that.

I think most people would gently wake the person up.