To be p'eed off when people don't give up their seats on the tube?

[splashy]

I know I'm not but I need to vent!

Am 28 weeks pregnant and am fed up off people ignoring me, pushing past me to seats, and even shoving me.

Was a size 8-10 before being pregnant and still only wear a regular size 12 (don't like the look of maternity clothes). My weight is all on my belly so it's not like people might mistake me for fat.

Just bleedin' inconsiderate!

Poor you, it's awful I know.
If I see you on the tube, I promise I'll get up for you

Tiresome isn't it. I remember it well. Especially lovely in this kind of heat as I recall.

Why not ask?

There are stickers by the seats at the end of the rows indicating priority seats.

Just say to the person sitting there, "Excuse me, do you mind if I sit down? I'm pregnant and it's very hot today."

I used to ask - very nicely. 9/10 times it worked.

Also - though you think you look very pregnant to you - at 28 weeks, other people may not be so sure

Wait until you are at 40+8 in the middle of a heatwave, then you are allowed to be properly pissed off!

I agree with Jamie. Being that mother who asked another mother at mum and toddler group did she have a new little bump.

She didn't.

The ground did not open up and swallow me whole and for that reason, most wise people will not offer a seat to someone they cannot be sure is pregnant.

Do you ask?

If you don't ask then you have no reason to complain imo. If you ask and people refuse then I'd be pissed off too. People don't want to make a mistake or offend or cause an embarassing moment - I think if you want a seat then it's up to you to make the first move!

I've always been too shy to ask!

Might try in future, was worried about peoples reaction.

Also I do look very pregnant! And def not fat!

Went on holiday recently and was surprised how everyobdy made allowances and was so considerate. Coming back to London was a bit of a shock!

I once offered my seat on a tube to a pregnant lady only to be told that she was pregnant, not disabled. I won't do it again.

You need one of these badges - quote from tfl website -
Pregnant women can also wear a 'Baby on board' badge to let other passengers know they may need a seat. These are available from our Customer Service Centre, or by calling 0845 330 9880 or emailing [email protected].

I was given one at a tube station by a member of staff about 3 years ago. I was about 35 weeks pg with twins and REALLY didn't need the badge for anyone to see I was with child...

You can get a 'Baby on Board' badge from tfl. You should also ask, I usually zone out on the tube and wouldn't even notice my own reflection on some days.

Weeeeeeeeeeeelll - you're 28 weeks pregnant - not ill.

Are you suffering in any way? Or is it the case that you would just like a seat?

That may sound harsh, but why should people give you a seat just because you're having a baby? You are, presumably, fit and well so that you can go to work?

That said, I agree with everyone else - if you want a priority seat (and they are earmarked) then you should ask. I have also seen other women wearing some kind of badge, with LU branding on it, that advertises their pregnancy.

Agree with Choogirl. People on the Tube are slumped with their heads in Metro, not looking each other up and down thinking "hmm, is that just flab...or...?"
I always offer, if I'm 100% sure.

Becauseimworthit - its not easy standing while heavily pregnant! Esp in the heat. I do feel nauseaus and dizzy and medical advice says pregnant women should not spend a lot of time on their feet.

Don't think I'm being unreasonable to expect some consideration. Am less able to stand than a fit young person.

And no I'm not working atm - not that that should matter at all. A lot of jobs are sedentary.

Thanks for the hint about the badges.

I do take the point that people may be to engrossed in their papers to notice.

28 weeks is not heavily pregnant.

And if you're not working, why are you travelling when the tubes are so busy?

You are not less able to stand than a fit young person. Unless you have some medical condition that you're not letting on about.

But if you're not feeling well, then just ask people.

I think that's a really unnecessary attack! Have you got the hump against pregnant women for some reason?

The tube is often busy, not just at rush hour. Its not that easy to avoid esp with all the line closures at weekends.

And yes being pregnant does make you less able to stand - don't take my word for it, look att current medical advice.

I don't see why you are being so nasty.

I've often stood in a packed tube carriage, pg and carrying a toddler, people look straight at me and stay sitting. it's crap.

People are rude.

becauseimworthit, at 28 weeks you might've been fine, not everyone is, and I think people should offer anyway, as a courtesy. What's wrong with being nice and polite? I don't think a whole carriage of commuters is likely to be filled entirely with people who can't give up their seat due to unseen disabilities ...

Jimmy Carr said yesterday it is better to see a pregnant woman stand than a fat woman cry.

if someone's overweight it is hard to tell sometimes, but a woman who's a healthy weight? it's pretty easy to see she's pg and not fat by 28 weeks.

YANBU

I nearly got pushed onto the train tracks heading home from work at the 5pm rush. Seriously. A woman shoved past me (I was at the end of the slow moving single line queue of people trying to get along the platform since it was MOBBED) and she fecking PUSHED past me. I too was not obviously pregnant from the back but was about to go on mat leave, highly emotional and HATED the rush hour commute into and out of the city.

She had a square go at me for holding her up then noticed my bump and started on at me saying she "could say much worse" to me but was "trying to be nice" as I do look quite young for my age (in a red cheeked 12 yr old way rather than anything else) so I reckon she pushed me, realised I was pregnant then chose to defend her pushing me by assuming LOUDLY that I was an underage mother or something equally as non PC!

Anyway, I seldom got a seat and would get jostled about when people try n get off at each stop n was constanly huddled round my bump trying to avoid the handles on the seats, people's umbrella's, seat corners, ticket inspectors, ELBOWS and such like.

YANBU. People are just selfish twats. I got the argument of "well, we all pay for our seats" but so did I as a regular commuter and seldom got a seat. When late stages of pregnancy, I nearly passed out from the heat and a few times people offered me a seat and I gladly took it. Sometimes other commuters tried to take the seat the person was offering as I was standing 3 people away and they would just see an opening n try to dive on in there.

No, you may not be ill but ur vital organs are squashed to a minute percentage of the original size, you have likely had a hard day and would not choose to travel rush hour at the best of times unless you are forced to ie get home before 8pm...

Ask politely if someone is willing to give up their seat and there maybe someone kind enough to do it. I never asked and lots of other standing passengers just gave me the "just ask!!!" eyes or the "Awww... you poor thing" eyes while the seated one's avoided eye contact at all costs.

Also, the trains these days go so bloody fast that you are thrown about like a rag doll n it is already impossible to stay upright when you have a humungous belly you are trying desperately to protect.

wait till you have a couple of toddlers and bump to lug about - then come back and moan

28 weeks not to bad is it?

Hmmmmm it is not unreasonable to expect someone to stand up when the train is very busy.

However, although I look fit and healthy I suffer terribly with lower back pain if I stand for a long time and I would hate someone to look at me and think I'm selfish for not standing up.

OP, I'm always surprised at how many people on these threads are unsympathetic. I think we as a society have really lost something when we start demanding that pregnant women/older people/people with disabilities should justify getting offered a seat. I always operate on the assumption that I'll offer a pregnant woman my seat, and if she doesn't feel she needs it she'll decline politely. It just makes for a more civilised life all round.