to not want a strange child letting herself into my garden?

[mitochondria]

We were sitting in the garden today, after school. There was a scrabbling noise. Gate opens. Small girl appears.

"My dad says I can come and play"

I don't know this child, although she lives in our street. She joined in with my boys last time they were cleaning the car on the drive with their dad. That day, she then came into our garden and started bouncing on our trampoline. I asked her if her parents knew where she was, so she went to tell them.

Today, we were just about to go and visit grandparents, who live locally, so told her it wasn't a good time.

"When will you be back? Can I come then?"

No, because then we will be eating our meal.

"What time will you be doing that? Can I come afterwards?"

No, because I want to spend time with my family. (I didn't say that last bit).

Girl is about 8 years old. My sons are 5 and 3. They don't know her either, she doesn't go to their school (different uniform).

Is this not a bit odd? I wouldn't let my boys go and pester some random family. Am worried now that she'll be turning up all summer.

Would it be unreasonable to bolt the gate from the inside so she can't get in?

Or is this just me being antisocial again?

Should I get rid of the trampoline?

Get rid of the trampoline - dangerous and ruins the grass. Nothing to do with the girl!!!

Bolt the gate from the inside - also stops your kids escaping.

It's not unreasonable to bolt the gate, maybe her parents were not aware where she was?

Oooohhhh, you misery guts. Seriously !!

I'm afraid I have to agree with the misery guts comment!

My kids can't escape anyway, as the latch is too high up for them. She can reach it though!

Did the boys enjoy playing with her previously or were they indifferent?

No, YANBU in my opinion. It would irritate me too.

But I am mean.

YANBU, weird.

I'd freak out of my DD started inviting herself round to anyone's house/garden let alone a stranger!

YANBU about bolting the gate so she can't just randomly come in off the street, I so would mind you I can be pretty anti-social

Seriously do you even know her name? her parents' names? You could open yourself up to all sorts of problems that aren't your's to deal with. If she keeps coming round I'd have words with her parents.

I know I do sound a bit misery guts. In my defence, I've been at work all week, it's been hard going and I've barely seen my children.

If she fell off our dangerous trampoline and hurt herself I wouldn't know who to contact.

I'd have to go into the street and shout "anyone missing a rather pushy child?"

YANBU, but I'm an old misery who hates uninvited guests

just giving you reason as to why the gate is locked when parents knock on door asking why their daughter can't have free childcare

Put an extra lock towards the bottom of the gate so she can't reach it.

By problems I mean the sort my mum once had with some new kids on our street who angled for an invite round ours then went and told their mum my mum had shouted and sworn at them "for no reason".

What actually happened was I (aged about 6) fell over during a very rough game of "it" and got a nasty nose bleed and my mum suggested they "go home now and come back tomorrow and play" didn't swear or shout to much protesting from them.

Before you know their mum was round ours effing and blinding at my mum and setting a bad example to her kids for, erm... effing and blinding and upsetting them. All in front of me and my sister who were both very upset by then

That's exactly what I'd do. At the end of a long day at work with other people's children, I like my family time and always have.
Seriously, that child has boundary issues and needs more guidance from her carers.
To randomly muscle in to someone else's garden and not take no for an answer the first time takes some brass.She's not three, and it's not cute. It's pushy and might be dangerous if she applies it as a general rule when she sees someone else having fun and feels like joining in.

We have a pushy girl who's started to come round quite a lot the past few weeks.
Yeah, you are a misery, she only wants to make friends with your boys, have fun and play...
But I'm a misery too, it exasperates me and I do like family only time!
yabu & yanbu...

it would bother me from the point of view that it means you have to supervise her play while she is there. if she were to hurt herself would her parents blame you? i think it is rude of her parents to let her come round without first coming to introduce themselves and ask if you mind.

tell her if she's lost, you'll phone the social workers to come and get her.

I have had that happen quite a few times over the years.

I dont like it because I dont like kids in the house if their parents dont know where they are or dont care.

I know its a bit mean but I just cant be arsed to look after someone elses kid if they cant be bothered themselves.

We live on a big green with lots of (v nice, polite) kids from 3-12 yrs. Ever since we moved here random kids have knocked for our dc, turned up in our garden and even walked in when the door's open!
We quickly got used to it. We are not the world's most sociable people but we love this for the dc - it's all rather Enid Blyton!
YABU, welcome her in!

Misery guts.

Goblinchild love it!

I think these children need lessons on why gatecrashing isn't good behaviour. It's never to early to learn good mannars, she'll be helping herself to your vodka in the years to come, this really must not be tolerated so it's better to act now.

When I retire I'll buy a little gingerbread cottage in the woods.
I will invite passing children in with a smile and sweeties. I intend to be as self-sufficient as possible...

Jolly good Goblin. May I help you with the design?