to be mortified at ds behaviour at pre school today. he showed another boy his privates.

[cocopear]

picked ds up from pre school earlier. he is 4. his teacher took me aside and said that she had to put him in time out today because he and another boy were "touching inappropriate places" it turns out they had shown eachother their privates.

i am mortified, embarassed and angry. i dont know what to think, why has he done this?? he is not normally naughty, he is a very normal, happy, well balanced and generally well behaved little boy.

now all sorts is going through my mind, i am so worried as to why he might have done this??

i asked my dp (his stepdad) to have a word with him, which he now has. as i was so angry and embarassed i just did not know how to deal with it.

"why has he done this??"

Because he is a 4yo boy? You must have noticed by now how impressed they are with their willies? The trick is getting them to understand that not everyone is so impressed.

Normal behavior at his age TBH, I wouldn't get too stressed about it. They're just being curious.

Tis totally normal and if you over react he will be ashamed of his body.

Willies are interesting to little boys and is no different than showing a child another part of his body.

Really really dont freak out about this.

Normal.

You don't have to deal with it.

Ds2 once bit a hole in his ham sandwich and hung it on his willy, to his brother's enthusiastic applause.

All of my friends, particularly the boys, used to take great delight in showing everybody their willies from the ages of 4 until about 7, so I think it's a perfectly normal thing to do. They're just curious, and becoming aware that showing their bits is a bit rude and mischievous.

Woah relax he is just experimenting there is nothing to get so upset about I would just leave this be.

Yabu.... This is totally normal behaviour!
Please don't worry, he is not depraved or perverted just curious.

Colditz I am ROFL at the ham sandwich sorry.

YABU
mine does this with his mate all the time. I mean ALL the time
They even have a special willy song to accompany winky waggling and have wee wee races.

at the ham sandwich!! YABU.

colditz I think I may just have had a glimpse of my future...

Normal. Shame the teacher didn''t reassure you a bit.

I remember I worried a lot when DS1 went through a phase of this, but, honestly, they are just messing about.

I can understand you feeling that way but I think all children do the "show me yours & I'll show you mine" thing at some stage or another. When you've calmed down perhaps you could just say something about that's why people wear clothes, because we don't go around showing each other all our bodies? Please don't get too hung up about it though, it's probably just a one-off incident.

cocopear - I think you have over reacted here. He is 4 years old and private bits, especially willies are a massive source of curiousity and amusement to little boys (and big ones for that matter). It is totally normal behaviour.

You only job is to remin him when and where it is appropriate to have his bits out, and who is shows them too.

He doesn't need telling off for his interest though.

And FWIW little girls are just as interested in private bits too.

My ds sits on the toilet (he still doesn't wee standing up - he's 4 btw) and jiggles his willy around. He also pinches the skin around his belly button and pretends it's a mouth and makes it talk.
Very impressed he is by his wonderful body and keeps calling me to come and have a look

If it < ahem > comes up again, try and be a bit "bored policeman" rather than "worried, high-pitched mummy" about it.

Oh, and it doesn't mean he's gay (although that would be cool, too)

Came on here to post exactly what BalloonSlayer said!

his pre school teacher just seemed so horrified though as if he was some kind of pervert. the way she told me was as if he had done something REALLY awful.

and i am afraid i already HAVE gone off on one at him, that happened in the car on the way back from pre-school.

and thats the thing, i have never noticed him pay any attention to his "winky" as he calls it before.

i feel really bad now!

It gets no better I have 3 ds

Oh dear . perhaps now having a calm and NICE chat about it?

He's only little. The preschool worker (they are very rarely actually teachers) is a complete twat to worry you so much about such a normal and trivial thing.