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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

at my neighbours, for using my fence post?

93 replies

NewTeacher · 28/06/2010 14:10

Neighbours moved in recently and I noticed that they had put up a washing line by wrapping the wire/cord around our fence post.

Now AIBU as I've asked DH to have a word and ask them to remove it as he always bumps into neighbour at station of a morning. DH says he will but never does. I think he thinks I'm BU...So am I?

My worry is that over the years the post will come loose by having had heavy soggy wet clothes hanging on the washing line.

We paid over £3K to have the fences put in (We own fences on both sides of our garden and its 100ft long). Which means we will have to pay for repairs.

Am I justified in telling neighbours to get their own pole for their washing line?

OP posts:
saslou · 28/06/2010 14:16

YANBU but if you want to have good relations with your neighbours I suggest you leave it be and see if any damage does occur. If it starts to, that would be the time to have a quiet word. People being cheeky and not respectful of your property can be annoying so I see why you are not happy

clam · 28/06/2010 14:16

Well, not very neighbourly on your part, though, is it? It probably hasn't even occurred to them that it might be a problem. And a 3K fence ought to be able to take the weight of some washing.

Why don't you leave it for a bit, and monitor the condition of the post. If and when you see any signs of it not coping, then have a word then.

saslou · 28/06/2010 14:17

Meant to add that if they've just moved in they might be using this temporarily and will get around to buying a proper line

porcamiseria · 28/06/2010 14:17

this would anooy me too, but I'd hold off for now. If the fence stays OK, great. If you see even a shift, then drop them a nice note. if you go in guns blazing it might harm relations, unecessarily

booyhoo · 28/06/2010 14:18

tbh i would leave it. a fence costing that much should be able to withstand that and if it does become a problem i would raise it then but not until.

Original poster
NewTeacher · 28/06/2010 14:20

Hmmmm. Obviously with the lovely hot weather they are using it all the time now. Not at all in Winter.

IF damage occurs isnt it too late to say you've broken my fence post? What if they say they wont pay for damages? Thats my main worry!

OP posts:
Meow75 · 28/06/2010 14:21

Hmm, surely waiting until there IS some damage is too late really.

I think if you manage to get in conversation with them fairly soon, like before the end of the summer, mention it in passing. If by, for example the first of Sept, it's still there and they haven't bought a proper pole, go to them with the express intention of asking them what their plans are. Perhaps you could casually keep an eye on how much the line gets used and for what kind of stuff. If it's mainly smalls, baby and young child clothes, no problem. If it's heavy work pants, overalls, bedding, etc. then perhaps more cuase for concern.

CerealOffender · 28/06/2010 14:22

wait until they hang out lots of washing esp white sheets.

then watch if they go out.

if there is a good downpour go and dance in their garden to stir up the mud.

then chop the washing line down!

or alternatively chillax

booyhoo · 28/06/2010 14:23

perhaps you are right, couldn't you just say something in passing like "we were so disorganised when we moved in we didn't get a washing pole for a few weeks either." and then perhaps mention somewhere that they could buy one?

Lovecat · 28/06/2010 14:30

Oh dear God... YABVU and v. mean, that's what fenceposts are for!

wahwah · 28/06/2010 14:30

Perhaps they think it's their fence- is it on their 'side'?

GypsyMoth · 28/06/2010 14:33

agree with lovecat......not saying anymore but thinking it instead!!

yabvu

Original poster
NewTeacher · 28/06/2010 14:34

They know its not their fence.

I'm not trying to be mean or un neighbourly. I just thought its manners to ask first.Its not a shared fence its ALL MINE!

OP posts:
Floopy21 · 28/06/2010 14:38

It would bother me. Like you say, it's not their fence to ruin.

ExitPursuedByABear · 28/06/2010 14:38

I once lived next to an old woman who complained because I had tied up some roses round her concrete trellis. She wouldn't let me fix wooden trellis to her concrete trellis either. I thought she was being an old witch . Didn't spoil my relationship with her though.

Mingg · 28/06/2010 14:39

So it would be ok for them to use it had they asked before?

wahwah · 28/06/2010 14:39

To be honest, if they knew and didn't ask permission would piss me off too. Say something before it festers and they do something else!

Jamieandhismagictorch · 28/06/2010 14:40

It would not occur to be annoyed about this, although you do have an argument, I suppose. I think you should hold off mentioning this, or you may risk having your first contact with the new neighbours soured by something fairly trivial

Debs75 · 28/06/2010 14:40

Is it on your right side or left side of the garden?
Apparently as you look out of your back door you are responsible for the boundary on the left hand side and your right hand neighbours are responsible for their left hand boundary, your right hand side boundary.

If they break the fence on their left side then they should come to an agreement about repairing it.
Check local council/bylaws in case I have the wrong side.

Oh YABU. I have had my washing line attached to my drainpipe and to my fencepost for the past 7 years and they are nowhere near sagging. They are strong concrete posts so the can put up with a couple of pounds worth of wet washing

mumofthreesweeties · 28/06/2010 14:40

NewTeacher, if I was your neighour I would ask if you minded first because it is your property and on your land. Yes it is not very neighbourly but I feel it is always better to start as you mean to carry on i.e. be upfront so that you both know where you stand. I would mention it politely to them that the fence posts are your property and you are not comfortable with them using them to prop up their washing line. 3k is a lot of money and for that amount I would be willing to risk neighbourliness so to speak.

I just about speak with my neighbours; and each time their music is too loud I knock on their door and if they dont respond I report them to the environmental noise unit. Okay a bit off topic but if I was in your position I would certainly ask them politely to remove it. Legally that is a 'continuing trespass' on your land, albeit it is your washing line. YANBU

Greensleeves · 28/06/2010 14:40

"perhaps you are right, couldn't you just say something in passing like "we were so disorganised when we moved in we didn't get a washing pole for a few weeks either." "

booyhoo that would annoy me intensely

if you want them to move it, be honest and tell them to move it

but be prepared for the fact that they will think you are a petty sod

sue52 · 28/06/2010 14:41

YANBU But in order to have a good relationship with these people you might have to put up with it.

mumofthreesweeties · 28/06/2010 14:42

Sorry that should read 'albeit the trespass is on your fence post.'

Original poster
NewTeacher · 28/06/2010 14:42

Ahh Jamie to me its not trivial. The hassle of having someone come in and fix said post would be sooooo annoying.

I dont mind if they think I'm a witch.

OP posts:
DinahRod · 28/06/2010 14:42

Buy them rotary clothes line as a house warming present.